@fabel I never wrote my pen pal either. But I also never got a letter. Maybe we were each other's!
@zamboni When that thing got to "YOU'RE NOT FAT" I did a serious double-take here in my office.
I think in some ways the experiment was doomed to fail with how intense the parameters were--I mean, weekly couples therapy? Being required to see each other daily? A weekend trip after a month? That's way more, way faster than most "normal" couples. I'm totally unsurprised it didn't work out.
Also Tim seems like a juicebox. When she wanted to quit halfway through and he got all hurt and convinced her to keep it going, then at the end he says "I'm in love with you but we can't be together"? What is that? Argh!!
I'm sad this doesn't have any other comments, because I always sort of loved Jojo. I can't believe I didn't know she had any new stuff out!
@karenb Maybe I just have particularly messy friends? I feel like I know several people who don't appear to regularly sweep/vacuum their floors.
I'm so sorry to hear about your pup. My childhood cat lived very many years and eventually everything stopped working, and we had to let her go -- it's not any easier to lose a family member even if you know it's coming. (Don't listen to anyone who doesn't think pets are family members!) You're doing the right thing by being concerned about her quality of life. Snuggle her hard for the next few weeks, and grieve however feels right to you.
@Quinn A@twitter Sometimes it's better to wait and bring things up later -- an immediate response is more likely to be seen as defensive. My current bosses coach people to accept feedback by simply saying "thank you for the feedback, I understand what you're saying" (or asking questions to clarify what they are saying if you don't get it) but making no other response in the moment. Then later, once you've had a chance to think about it, make a further response or adjustment if necessary. That shows that you really were thinking critically about it, not just reacting.
I hope it works out for you!
@wallsdonotfall I'm a shoes-on person, living in a mainly shoes-on area. If I walk into someone's house and there's a big pile of shoes by the door, sometimes I'll take my shoes off if I am wearing socks and/or I can tell that their floor is really clean. But sometimes peoples' floors aren't that clean and it's super gross. Or I'm wearing mismatched socks or something and I feel self-conscious about taking off my shoes.
I feel like if you're in a place where the norm is to not remove shoes, and you want to REQUIRE people to remove shoes, you should offer socks or slippers. If it's just a suggestion, then no need and just make sure people aren't actively tracking in mud (which hopefully they're not doing without needing to be told). And if you're in a place where it's the norm for everyone to take off the shoes, then your guests are expecting to and no special accommodations are necessary.
@cuminafterall BRING A BOOK. I've been called in three or four times and have never actually made it past the waiting room.
@Quinn A@twitter Can you meet with your supervisor and try to get more clarity on that recent feedback? Maybe you can say something like, "I'd like to talk about some recent issues and make sure I understand what I could be doing better. Firstly, I recognize that forgetting attachments on daily emails is unacceptable, and I will do my best not to repeat that mistake by double-checking for that every day. I am a little unclear about [these other things], can you help me understand exactly what is wrong here and how I can improve?"
In other words, be specific. Fess up honestly to what is an actual mistake and show that you understand why it's a mistake. And then ask him calmly and rationally to explain the other things to you. If you show you've taken the time to think about these things and sound like you genuinely want to understand his feedback and improve, hopefully that will be a good sign to him. And if he DOESN'T have good reasons for criticizing you, maybe he'll realize it when you ask him to be specific and explain why.
Also don't bring up your coworker that messes up more, because it'll make you sound petty (even though i have been in that situation too and it is indeed shitty). Just focus on you and your work.
@BosomBuddy Lately I've been into Dark & Stormys -- rum plus ginger beer. Especially nice if the bar has fancy artisanal-type ginger beer that's all spicy.