"The child got into the machine as we walked past, and I said 'you have no chance of getting her out' so I started filming to see what was going on. I didn't see the child get out as I had to go back to work." —Kids climbing inside crane games is totally normal now. Did it ever occur to you when you were little?
When buying a gift for your niece or nephew, you need to follow a few important guidelines. Clothes (too useful), video games (too boring for you), and any living creature (no explanation needed) are out. Also, try to steer clear of anything that is collectable, such as Yu-Gi-Oh!, Webkinz, or — heaven forbid — anything to do with Magic the Gathering, as these kind of things are simply too cruel to all parties involved. To get the maximum enjoyment, and thus the greatest return on your investment, you will need to think strategically and identify something that walks that thin line between being totally fun for kids and completely aggravating [...]
"Contemporary, gender-neutral, medium skin tone Baby GoGo™ appeals to every child." Hmm. Also, it is "outfitted in bright, gender-neutral colors" like orange and green.
"Shh, 'it' is sleeping."
Dolls we couldn't find on Paper Doll Heaven:
Paul Rudd Drake Josh Groban Jason Momoa Ryan Gosling Tony Hawk Wiz Khalifa Jon Hamm
Stimulates without overstimulating.
"A baby doesn't just shove the giraffe's head into his maw—he cradles it and squeezes it and gazes deeply into its dark black eyes." –Josh Levin on the love affair American babies are having with Sophie the Giraffe, the $25 French teething toy that has become the best-selling baby toy on Amazon. So what if you've purchased Sophie for at least three of your baby friends? Does that mean the poor kids will grow up to have some sort of giraffe fetish? : – [