Posts Tagged: texting
93

The Ghosting of Ghost

Day 1 hello hi hello oh  oh hi there has to be someone here  there really just has to be i dont want it just to be me here  hello? oh oh i dont want it to just be me

Day 19 well this happens to be a phone I couldn’t really say about the others so nobody knows then  I didn’t say that Some of them don’t wind up here or some of them do but not all of them or not for very long I can’t make you any promises you won’t end up in a cactus for a time or a cursed and collapsing star or a [...]

125

309 Days of Unanswered Texts

Texting can be like a reverse Brigadoon, with people emerging from and disappearing into the fog. Sometimes my phone registers an incoming text on duplicate: Hey! Hey! But sort of like email threads where you can now tell — whoa! you've spent 17 emails just figuring out which movie to see with your friend! — text logs can be eerily distilling things. Have you really not texted that friend since 2010? Sometimes you notice how someone replies almost entirely with the same text (I have a correspondence consisting almost entirely of "amazing"s and smileyfaces). But nothing is quite so haunting as being on either side of a one-way conversation. I'm [...]

149

Texts From Scarlett O'Hara

where r u Scarlett I'm at work I can't text right now need u at mill Scarlett I have the baby with me I really can't come to the mill what baby My baby. Wade. My baby with Melanie. guess what kind of corset im wearing I don't see what this has to do with the mi- im not

Darling, I was going through some old things this morning and found Charles’ ornamental officer’s sash I thought you’d like to have it So I gave it to Mammy for cleaning and she’ll give it to you later who is charles Scarlett, how you joke! was he that guy I [...]

215

Text Messages From a Ghost

October 14th hey im gaunting you ok Do you mean haunting yeah sorry i don’t have any fingers so im poltergeisting a stick to help me text this Who is this? oh sorry im a ghost So do you live inside this phone yeah kind of

October 21st sorry if last night was pretty loud Sorry? some other ghosts came over last night and we fought we used to be roommates Oh. they weren’t good roommates I’m sorry no no it’s okay I mean its really nice of you to care I really like haunting you a lot Don’t you mean “gaunting” hahaha you remembered

131

A Text Dialogue With a Twist

The background: a few months ago, I borrowed a friend's car to make a short trip and was, within minutes, in a car accident. (Ugh.) Both cars were rendered undriveable. The man with whom I collided texted me a couple of days later. The following is what ensued. 

272

Texts From the Baby-Sitters Club

Hey Claudia I know math is really tough for you but even you should know that two dollars an hour for six hours means we’re at least twelve dollars short of what should be in the treasury i know how much twelve is, Kristy and i didn't take your stupid money look all I'm saying is that someone that good at hiding candy in her room probably has a few great places to hide twelve dollars like maybe in an incredibly ugly macrame wallet with velvet appliqués yeah well at least my dad still lives at home unlike some people’s dads unlike your dad  Kristy

Kristy? It's Mallory I hope [...]

112

Text Me Possibly

"I happen to love long conversations on the telephone, probably because I think I’m pretty great at it – I’m highly verbal, thrilled by the joust and parry of a good debate, and the pure audio allows me to stop worrying about stupid stuff like how I look in this dress, and what your eyes are staring at right now OMG there is something in my nose." —Salon's lovely Sarah Hepola is insane.

206

Texts From Little Women

MEG  MEG  MEG WHAT’S ALL THIS  WHAT’S ALL THIS I’M HEARING ABOUT YOUR GETTING MARRIED tell me it’s a wretched lie  Jo I don’t know how many more times we have to have this conversation I’ll have it a THOUSAND TIMES if I must but yes I am still marrying John tomorrow OH GREAT TRIPLE-HORNED GOD just like I was planning to yesterday this is unbearable and also last month answer me this, then who exactly do you think is going to play Mercy when we put on my version of The Pilgrim’s Progress this summer? I wrote that part for YOU  wrote it beautifully in fact I don’t know, [...]

121

WYMM? ;)

Dear Miss Manners: In the past year, two male friends whom I have known for years proposed marriage. I turned them down due to the fact that both asked me in a text message.

So. Many. Questions! 1. How old are you guys? (27) 2. Two in one year! Not so much a question. 3. Did you get a new hairdo recently or something? 4. Is it possible they were being funny? Sarcasm in text messages is hard to read. 5. What were you guys doing for all those years? 6. Being friends? 7. Are you sure? 8. Did you turn them down also via text? 9. How? Just [...]

238

Reading Between the Texts: S.O.S.

The Texts

Him: Are you familiar with the Myers-Briggs personality assessment? M: Yes. Him: Might I ask what your results were? M: INTJ. Him: That's what I surmised. M: Haha…why? Him: I noticed in class that your lower jaw is slack during class, and INTJs typically have underdeveloped facial muscles.

The Analysis

K: I’m just going to very quickly grab a butcher knife. I’ve seen like six episodes of CSI that start this way. M: I know. I’m SO glad I know karate. I mean … it’s probably fine, I just think he’s never actually interacted with another human being before, ever in his life. K: No kidding. He [...]