Posts Tagged: sorry
78

Why I Have To Be So "Rude"

"Rude" is the #1 song in America; “Rude” is a strong contender for the worst song I have ever heard. For the lucky uninitiated, I can only explain “Rude” like this: it’s the aural equivalent of a man listening to reggae for the first time in his racecar bed, slowly fucking the hole in a Kidz Bop CD.

Here, take a dip, the water's absolutely disgusting!

Ostensibly, the success of Magic!’s “Rude” can at least partially be explained by the history of American top 40's irregular dabbles in reggae, which have tended to appear in the form of one-offs rather than any tangible wave: “I Can See Clearly Now” in [...]

3

Everyone Is Daydreaming, Everyone Is Miserable

Are you even paying attention to this critical blog post or are you daydreaming about that thing that you did or that thing you might do or could have said in that situation that already happened, but also maybe what outfit would look good when you go out later, and should you even go out later at all, because honestly if you were smart or even vaguely responsible you would just take a sleeping pill and disappear? Or are you having sex? In which case you aren't daydreaming at all. (But also, let's be real, if you're having sex you're definitely still daydreaming, it's just a little different [...]

2

Sure Would Look Horrifying If a Hornets' Nest Were to Form Around An Abandoned Statue

A hornets' nest is usually a frightening sight, but one discovered in an abandoned shed recently is truly the stuff of nightmares. The nest formed around a wooden face with a spooky-looking face to become a terrifying combination of the two – a hornets' nest with a human face.

-There is a photo of this at the Daily Mail. It is a scrolldown horrorshow, but maybe it's that kind of Friday.

2

The sad thing about dying is you can't even appreciate how much QUALITY REST you're getting.

43

This Is What a Swamp Booger Looks Like

Hello, hi there. This is a swamp booger. What is a swamp booger? Oh, just a deer hide that someone has stitched a face onto for decoration. Sometimes they go on the mantelpiece. From Hairpin pal Seth Rosenthal, who excerpts from Dave Madden's The Authentic Animal:

The swamp booger is the answer to the question, What are we supposed to do with all these posterior deer hides? You take the ass skin of a deer, turn it upside down so the tail hangs to the floor, secure some glass eyes near the top, and fix an artificial bobcat jaw right where the anus used to be. Et [...]

1

Blake Lively, Penn Badgley Split

OMG SERENA AND DAN BROKE UP IRL. If this speaks to you, head over to Us Weekly, where lots of people are hilariously, frantically "Like"ing it on Facebook.