A real winner wrote into The Guardian to explain a dilemma:
I am a 23-year-old man and am obsessed with celebrity culture. Whenever I have sex with my girlfriend, I insist that she must wear a mask of one of the female celebrities who really turn me on, such as Billie Piper or Kimberley Walsh. My girlfriend isn't too impressed with this, but goes along with it anyway. However, when she wants me to have sex with her when she is not wearing a mask, I don't think I can, because I can only get turned on by the celebrities.
Now, the first sentence of the official response began [...]