Posts Tagged: jolie kerr

A Happy Ending for Bath Wine

On Monday, I lamented; this Friday, I rejoice. Copied and pasted directly from an email from the one woman who can save America: "This would work, right? Better than suction cups? Clip it onto the soapdish? Use a stemless wine glass? Too much of a stretch???"

Not a stretch but a stroke of genius.


Celebrate National Clean Off Your Desk Day With Jolie

Are we doing Year of the Clean Person? Surely I can start with Day of the Clean Desk? I cleaned mine off really well on Saturday, but it's already wearing a light layer of cups and pens and headphones and Kleenex and keys and lighters and sandwich crumbs. Jolie Kerr, perpetual light in the filthy, filthy darkness, suggests an office-cleaning toolkit:

  • A tube of pre-moistened wipes
  • Canned air
  • Isopropyl alcohol
  • A chamois or other soft cloth for cleaning electronics
  • A small bottle of dish soap and a quick-dry sponge for cleaning up spills on clothing, upholstery or carpet

Yes. I can do that. Canned [...]


Ask a Clean Person: Holiday Disasters 2012

Happy just-about-holidays, everyone! Here we are, facing another holiday season full of potential cleaning disasters. But this year we're getting a jump on things so you can be PREPARED. In the spirit of preparation, a festive reminder for you that topics covered last year included Menorah wax, massive butter spills in the kitchen, frosting on fabric, pine sap on everything, stains on ties, and barf on green corduroy party shorts.

Here's to hoping your green party shorts remain barf-free this holiday season!

1. This is a sort of MacGyver question. The holidays are loaded with unexpected visitors — here’s a scenario: You’re at home. Someone calls and says, “I [...]


A Salem-Lover's Tourism Guide

With the exception of Sainte Chapelle in Paris, Salem, Massachusetts, is my favorite place in the entire world. You'd have to be very hard of heart to argue with the winning combination of witches and salt water taffy.

As a youngster growing up in Boston, my mother and I would head up Route 1 every year in October to attend Salem's annual psychic fair and putter about the town enjoying the lovely fall weather. (Everything they tell you about fall in New England is entirely true, by the way. I'm getting misty-eyed just thinking about it.)

That yearly outing was in addition to the school field trips and [...]


Ask a Clean Person About Her New Book: A Conversation With Jolie Kerr

Lovely, stylish, very clean person Jolie Kerr has a book out Tuesday from Plume, and we are very excited, not least because Jolie got her cleanliness-writing start right here at The Hairpin. My Boyfriend Barfed in My Handbag . . . and Other Things You Can't Ask Martha is precisely what it sounds like, a cohesive, informative, and fun compendium to help you reduce filth of all shapes, sizes, and proteins without judgment. New York-area folks: Mark your calendars for the book launch, moderated by Hairpin writer Bobby Finger, at the Powerhouse Arena in Brooklyn on Wednesday, February 26.

I talked to Jolie about how the column got [...]


Ask the Non-Squalid

If you've been missing the lovely Jolie Kerr's "Ask a Clean Person" un-filthying column on this site, it's now running on Jezebel and Deadspin, on alternating weeks, as "Squalor."

Sadly we couldn't keep her here forever, much as it would have been nice to (in an immaculate steel cage for all eternity), but the first installment deals with problematic outerwear, among other things, and everyone remains reassuringly disgusting.


Jolie Kerr is also on Tumblr and Twitter.

Wait, Jolie, how do you get [chickadees?] out of an air-conditioner?


Beauty Q&A: Nails 101

Jolie: I have fingernail anxiety. Well. I have anxiety in general but today we're going to talk specifically about my fingernail anxiety. The issue is this: I like a nice looking hand. I admire the sort of woman who always has a manicure. I aspire to be that sort of woman! But I cannot, for the life of me, sit still in a salon long enough to let things dry and then I get angry with myself for ruining the manicure I just paid for but also I can absolutely not manage to get my cuticles looking remotely acceptable on my own, though I am rather good with the painting [...]


Impress Her With a Clean Bong

"That was a friend who emailed me. I hadn’t talked to him in a while, and he wrote and said: 'Hey, how are you? San Fran’s great, I’m seeing a new lady, and I want to impress her with a clean bong.'"

—We'll have more with Clean Person Jolie Kerr on the site next week, but please tide yourself over with her Q&A in the New York Times (!) today. My Boyfriend Barfed in My Handbag is due out next Tuesday, and she and Bobby Finger will be chatting at Brooklyn's Powerhouse Arena next Wednesday, Feb. 26 at 7 p.m. Details [...]


Memories of Austen and "Pride and Prejudice"

In my junior year of college, I took a Jane Austen seminar with about ten other women and one guy; the chaff (like, two hundred women and…one guy) having been swiftly winnowed out by the necessity of writing an introductory Austen essay to be judged on. And it was a great seminar, and I met my best friend in it because we had both just been dumped and could not write our final papers and got basically eternal extensions on them—I think they still have my diploma—because our professor had also suffered great heartbreak. So, when I think of "Pride and Prejudice," I think first of female friendship, now, and [...]


I'm Redecorating My Living Room*

Coffin Couch | VonErickson They say that the centerpiece of any living room is the couch, so we'll start from here and keep going. (I'm not exactly sure who "they" are.)