Posts Tagged: horoscopes

If Chain Restaurants Had Astrological Signs

Cancer: The Olive Garden When you're here, you're family! But even if you're not, that's okay, because Cancer’s extreme need for emotional stability and fear of change will force you to stay, eating endless salad and breadsticks, until you have no choice but to love them.


July Horoscopes from Galactic Rabbit

Dear Internet Bunnies,

We’re most of us in the thick of summer and this July I’m a fuzzy love bunny lounging in the cool shade. Come outside and sit for a spell with me. We can steal the burgeoning root veggies just toeing up in the warm dirt. For these horoscopes, I’ve decided that each of you needed a song and I know we all have different tastes but I hope you’ll give your music-familiars a chance. The sun is so bright, and the flowers born new everyday. If a storm comes, let it be a relief, an opening—we are in this together, you and I.

Yours, Galactic Rabbit


The Gift of Small Predictions: January Horoscopes from Galactic Rabbit

Welcome to My Mystic Galaxy Lair, Hairpin Readers. It is my pleasure to offer you this gift of small predictions, warnings and love-notes. This is an informal tea, a midnight crumpet party, so take what you need and leave the rest. All My Cosmic Love, Galactic Rabbit

Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19): Capricorn, inscrutable animal, it’s your month. The Sun and Moon are with you and illumination is yours. HARK! The cosmos sings your name so take the risk and sing along. It’s time to make a home of your body, the house you are always building but never have time to reside in. Have you made yourself dinner? Was it nourishing? Give [...]


The Ancient Butter Face

Something fun/ridiculous for a Friday: Are you an Earth Face, a Wood Face, or a Water Face?


November Horoscopes From Galactic Rabbit

Dear Windswept Bunnies,

This November marks yet another month deeply influenced by Venus and Saturn which continue to move close to sun and ache to teach us about the love we make in this world and the promises we should keep versus the ones we do. I am sending these notes out to each of you and with them my love and my commitment.

In deep listening, Galactic Rabbit


April Horoscopes from Galactic Rabbit

Dearest Starbunnies,

O April is the cruelest, I know. Too many days it took me to catch these thoughts for you. 'Tis hard to be a crystal whilst suffering Spring plague. 'Tis not hard to slip into this silly, affected voice. Okay, I'll stop fooling around: here is what I have for you, my Spring hares! Before you search for your personal sign, I would like to avail you of some key planetary information. This April presents us with a Cardinal Cross. What is that? That is when the four cardinal signs: Aries (Uranus), Cancer (Jupiter), Capricorn (Pluto) and Libra (retro Mars) form a square in the sky! They [...]


Horoscope Is Life

Vintage romance comic book treasure trove / secret garden / haunted mansion / invisible crypt Sequential Crush outdoes itself today with the 1970 story "Horoscope Don't Fool With My Heart," in which the gloriously haired Ginny relies on her astrology books a little too much — or does she???

Plus there's another story at the end, and it is amazing.


October Horoscopes From Galactic Rabbit

Dear Fall Bunnies,

I might have mentioned before that I love fall. I love the birth and death of it. The harvest reaped in the midst of thinning trees, the slow and steady slide into winter’s blankets and cool gray skies. I must also mention that October is a hard month for me. That I spend it and the month that follows oscillating between deep gratitude and soft depression. That this is primarily due to a personal wound I carry, but I think there’s more. I think that as Adrienne Rich (oh my Taurus moon-heart aches) once wrote, we lack a language for talking about personal pain as communal. [...]


What Your One Direction Crush Says About Your Year

With the dawn of the new year, the astrological tides have shifted, giving new meaning to old loves. Read on to see what your One Direction crush—your most important zodiac feature—means for the year ahead.


It’s time to come out from the woodwork, Zayniac. You are the core, the xylem, the support beam. You smiled your way through 2013, but dimples can’t work forever. Have you been longing for more attention, more respect, more tattoos? Don’t worry: this year, the vernal lunar patterns will usher in a period of openness, making it feel easy — even necessary — for you to move into the spotlight. Some people may shy away from [...]


Tonight's Full Moon

Last weekend for whatever reason I decided to check my horoscope on AstrologyZone, which can sometimes be entertaining even if you don't buy into any of it, mostly because Susan Miller — AZ's proprietress — writes with such thoughtful and breathless conviction, it's amazing. Anyway, I lost my iPhone a few weeks ago (sorry to everyone I know; this has been the only thing I've talked about since), and then in the horoscope it said that March would be a month in which it'd be easy to lose valuable possessions, such as smartphones. What! Oh my god. *faints* And then she said that the full moon on [...]