The sexy Halloween costume is tyranny; it is irony without attendance. Sexy Halloween costume, I decry you. This Halloween, I humbly submit that we take our costume cues from a simpler, less brazenly sexy time: Arden Holt’s Fancy Dresses Described; or, What to Wear at Fancy Balls, already through five editions in 1887. This volume has suggestions for everybody: “brunes,” fair women, history enthusiasts, elderly ladies, and even gentlemen. Here are some selections of fancy dresses:
Kate Thornbery made our dreams come true this weekend. Bravo, Kate. Bravo.
Cecilia Rebecca Ziko: One year my brother's friend dressed up as The Best Man: disheveled and in an ill-fitted suit, top buttons and tie undone, shirt half untucked. Maybe missing a shoe. He spent the night standing on chairs making toasts, spilling his gin and tonics, putting his arm around people and telling them awkward stories. Doing the worm. Whenever someone asked who he was suppose to be, he would act all offended, "What do you mean 'Who am I?' I'm the best man!" I think he ended the night passed out in a closet.
Drew Zandonella-Stannard: One of my old coworkers once went as a garden gnome. She basically [...]
Literary Halloween: Susan Sontag in a Bear Suit, Virginia Woolf in Blackface, Anais Nin Dressed as Her "Madness"
"[Anais Nin] described her costume as follows: I wore a skin-colored leotard, leopard-fur earrings glued to my naked breasts, and a leopard-fur belt around my waist. Gil Henderson painted on my bare back a vivid jungle scene. I wore eyelashes two inches long. My hair was dusted with gold powder. My head was inside of a birdcage. From within the cage, through the open gate, I pulled out an endless roll of paper on which I had written lines from my books. The ticker tape of the unconscious. I unwound this and handed everyone a strip with a message." Pictures, and more reminders that writers are totally fucking crazy, at [...]
Also known as "spider ballet," spider dressage (or, dressage araignée) is the highest form of spider training, and its fundamental purpose is to develop, through standardized progressive training methods, a spider's natural athletic ability and willingness to perform. At the peak of a dressage spider's gymnastic development, the spider will respond smoothly to a skilled rider's minimal aids. The rider will be relaxed and appear effort-free, while the spider willingly performs the requested movement.
A woman's five-year-old son wanted to dress up as Daphne from Scooby Doo for Halloween, so he did, and he looked adorable, as you can see at left. The problems, however, started when he got to preschool, where a cluster of "concerned" moms started acting like big old C words! So his mom took to her blog and wrote an awesome, heartbreaking defense — I recommend it all, although here's a choice excerpt:
If you think that me allowing my son to be a female character for Halloween is somehow going to ‘make’ him gay then you are an idiot. Firstly, what a ridiculous concept. Secondly, if my [...]