Here is Chairlift's Caroline Palochek rowing, as chill-like as possible, among alligators in the Florida Everglades for the first single off her new solo album as "Ramona Lisa." Palochek calls the track "a song about a sweet fling that quietly finds its own way out the door without having to be asked" and then, still very chill-like, tells Vogue, "At first I was very nervous about the alligators drifting in sneaky circles around our boats, and even had to hit one repeatedly over the head to get it to let go of my paddle, but by day two I found them elegant and intriguing, like the reptile [...]
Via the Miami Herald, a hideous tale of institutional privilege:
Earl Sampson has been stopped and questioned by Miami Gardens police 258 times in four years. He’s been searched more than 100 times. And arrested and jailed 56 times.
Despite his long rap sheet, Sampson, 28, has never been convicted of anything more serious than possession of marijuana.
Miami Gardens police have arrested Sampson 62 times for one offense: trespassing. Almost every citation was issued at the same place: the 207 Quickstop, a convenience store on 207th Street in Miami Gardens. But Sampson isn’t loitering. He works as a clerk at the Quickstop.
258 times in four years. [...]
Dorcas and his team have driven over 57,000 kilometres of Everglades tracks, counting animals as they went. They worked between sunset and sunrise on 313 separate nights. Their roadside census showed that since 2003, when the python populations really took off, raccoon sightings have fallen by 99.3 per cent. Opossum numbers have fallen by 98.9 per cent. There are 87.5 per cent fewer bobcats. They didn’t see a single rabbit.
A Catholic priest in Miami has admitted to violating the chastity of a woman he was attempting to exorcise.
He denied that he "targeted vulnerable women." He said that he conducted exorcisms on women with witnesses, except for occasional emergency sessions . He denied soliciting money, other than to cover his travel.
But what does this mean?
"Some have even claimed falsely and maliciously that there is a possessed person living in my family's home," he wrote…
I think I'll stick with the demons.
The Boston Public Library's Flickr account has an amazing collection of postcards from the '30s and '40s, all published by a Boston firm called Tichnor Brothers, and you can search them by state: Florida, from whence came Ma and Pa Pelican, has over 3,000 postcards in the archive. [Via]
Photo via BPL/Flickr
The year: 2003. My grandma was turning 80! So my big brother and I went down to her house in Fort Lauderdale to hang out with her and celebrate. We went to the Mai Kai and drank tiki drinks … we went to the Rustic Inn and ate garlic crabs … and, of course, we went to the beach.
Usually we opted for Dania Beach because it's generally pretty quiet and deserted. (I think 'cause there's nowhere to buy beer.) But for some reason, that day we ended up at hot, crowded Hollywood Beach. My super-tan grandma oiled up in the sun, my pale brother read a paperback in a cabana, [...]
"If Carnival and Las Vegas had a baby, this would be the placenta." —There is great excitement in Florida this fall, as the Florida Marlins become the Miami Marlins, get a new logo, wear new uniforms, and build a new … thing in their new ballpark. It's like the Mets home-run apple, but different. And incredible. [Via]
Daytona Beach moves in waves, like purple against the sea, airbrushed angels and what looks like Marilyn Monroe done up in Bedazzled cotton with denim tassels, as if to say Welcome, I’m some type of mermaid, nothing matters.
A bunch of guys with UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA shirts pound their chasers back. A volleyball hits the deck. I’ve got sand in my teeth. Something is thumping somewhere, but gets silenced the farther you get from the beachside bar, silenced by the boom of waves and the deep of the ocean horizon, a guttural clurng that you can imagine would eat steel and oar right up.
Bus route [...]
"I asked her again if she would like to attempt the task and she stated not really because she has big breasts." [The deputy told her to keep her hands by her side and] "she stated, 'hell no not with these.' Telling me again she can't do it, not with her big boobies." —Police were unmoved by a Florida woman's request that they "understand that she is big-chested" and therefore unable to adequately demonstrate sobriety. (SIGTUTIBCOIGTKD?) [Via]
So, a friend and I both live in Central FL and it seems like we’re the only ones, but you never know! So. We’re planning a Pin-Up in Orlando the first weekend of November (Saturday, Nov. 5th), at 7 p.m. at Redlight Redlight on 475 Bennett Road, Orlando, FL 32803. If it’s just us, well, we’ll have a beer and a hot dog.
Diana and Laura will be eating hot dogs and drinking alone in Orlando if you care to join them.