Posts Tagged: evil
18

Being Maleficent

We were a motley band of homeschoolers, playing on a sunny back porch while our mothers had a Bible study inside. We had been warned against coming in and interrupting, so we scuffed our Keds against the floor boards and broke sticks into little logs. Most of the girls wore ankle-length skirts or jumpers. They all had long hair, except me. I had mine cut short because I wouldn’t let my mom brush it, and she wanted it out of my face.

One of the older girls, her hair pulled up in a large bow that matched the trimming on her socks, glanced over us. “Let’s put on a [...]

269

How to Carry a Knockoff Designer Handbag

1. Don't?

2. Don't. Get a regular one.

3. Just really don't. Most of them are cheap because there is evil in the world.

4. If you're going to carry an evil knockoff designer handbag anyway, at least get one that looks like you could, in some stretch of the imagination, afford if it were real. Otherwise, it's obvious you're carrying an evil knockoff, which defeats the purpose. (What purpose?)

5. Don't.