Posts Tagged: emily weiss
63

Rejected TXT Wine Ideas

LMK!!! Vioginer OK!!! Rosé BRB Gewurztraminer kdfjsvhsba aersaofh 2 Liter Chablis PLZ? 4ME? Prosecco Get Horn New!! Auto-Correct Series Reserve Blend Sangiovese IMHO … Carmenere URAQT Beaujolais GTFO! Malbec Fume Blanc RU Sleeping??? Booty Call Bordeaux POS!!! Watered Down Vodka Lemonade

Emily Weiss never abbrevs anything.

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Foods From Fiction: Turkish Delight & Raspberry Cordial

After our last post about fictional foods and the lively discussion that followed in the comments (we MUST read these Redwall books), a very nice editor from Penguin emailed and told us about this very charming book they published in 2010 on the very subject of fanciful foods from literature.

Among the many adorable recipes and games the book provided, we found a recipe for Turkish Delight and another for Raspberry Cordial, and decided to set about making our youthful food-related dreams come true. Except that Turkish Delight is, as it turns out, a radioactive rose-flavored nightmare.

Katie: I generally don’t cook anything with more than three [...]

23

Nine Things to Name Your Oregon Trail Family

Ophelia Basically only prudent if you get to the point in the game where you are forced to forge high rivers with only one yoke of oxen, but “Ophelia has drowned” gives the English lit dork in all of us a reason to nod in self-satisfied agreement.

Your Mom’s Butt Works on many levels but is for sure funniest in the event of dysentery and to some degree, snakebite.

Somebody The ambiguity of the message “Somebody has cholera” allows you to feel that this is not actually an announcement of the probable loss of a member of your crew, but rather a mere warning that the disease is [...]

350

The Baby-Sitters Club: Where Are They Now?

Today, the original founding members (none of this Abby bullshit) of The Baby-sitters Club would be 37.

Let's see what everyone's up to.

Kristy Thomas Well obviously Kristy is a lesbian. She and her partner, Tori, started up a gay softball league when they moved to Baltimore in 1999, which Kristy coaches. Reminds her of her old days with The Krushers! I guess now we know how she really felt about Bart.

Tori and Kristy met while doing Teach for America. Kristy is active in the Baltimore public school system where she works in administrative policy.

Kristy reconnected briefly with her estranged father, Michael, who owns [...]

76

Harry Potter and the Liniment Layer Cake of Secrets

Hello Pinners! We are back to share even more foods from literature with you, this time with a “holiday” focus. And by “holiday” we mean we really stretched some of these recipes to make them festive/timely/edible. Once again we open a page in Turkish Delight & Treasure Hunts by Jane Brocket … and stare at it with mild confusion.

Emily: Our original plan was to make the most wintry treat in the index, which is “Sugar on Snow” from Little House on the Prairie. We assumed that, since we live in Minneapolis, we would have an endless supply of both ingredients, since it is cold like seven months out of [...]

8

Real Housewives Spin-Off Proposals

The pitch: After too many seasons of getting the villain edit, Jill from RHNYC decides to absolve herself AND return to her real estate roots, helping troubled and attractive live-in couples to go from renters to buyers. The working title: Owning It! With Jill Zarin Bravo’s reaction: “We are 90% sure this is already in development at HGTV.”

The pitch: A RHBH spin-off dedicated to following Vanderpump Jr.’s (you’re welcome for the cover-band name idea) preparations for her Big Day. The B plot follows Lisa Vanderpump as she travels the world to find six Fabergé eggs that will complete her daughter’s trousseau. The working title: Pandora’s Box Bravo’s reaction: [...]

11

Alternate Titles for Sheryl Crow’s New Cookbook, If It Makes You Healthy: More Than 100 Delicious Recipes Inspired by the Seasons

Anything But Sit-Down: Quick Snacks for Your Next Cocktail Party

A Chanterelle Would Do You Good: 50 Things to Make With Foraged Mushrooms

All I Wanna Fondue

Everyday Is a Suckling Roast: Hosting a Luau on a Budget

My Favorite Mix Cake: Simple Ways to Dress Up Duncan Hines

97

Decoding Movie Reviews

“A triumph!” = biopic set against a horse-related backdrop

“Dark, edgy” = someone inexplicably huffs chemicals

“Impeccably acted” = British person with good American accent/American person with good British accent

“High-octane thrill ride”  = contains cars that go fast and blow up

“…gives a brave performance” = gained weight for the role/wore prosthesis

“Sure to leave you on the edge of your seat” = ladies in underwear will be covered in blood

“…tugs at the heartstrings” = cancer*

467

I'll Have What That Character's Having: Foods We Want to Try

Emily: “Raspberry Cordial” – Anne of Green Gables I imagined this to be like an old-time Shirley Temple, but far more sophisticated. That lush Diana Barry could not wait to get her paws on a tumbler-full (I typed that “tumblr,” twice. Internet!) of this shit, so it must have been good because, since she was vaguely rich, I assumed she must've been something of a cordial aficionado. Of course what she was drinking actually turned out to be currant wine (notably absent from the list), but according to the Anne of Green Gables Cookbook, this elixir is basically just raspberry sugar-water.

Katie: “Edible Teacup” – Willy Wonka & [...]

9

Done Anything Lately? You Might Be a Role Model

Say what you will about the current spiritual zeitgeist, but I take comfort in the fact that these days it's just so easy-peasy to become a guru! Check it out — in the old days it was like, “learn all thesevedas, exercise humility, live under this one tree, and confront (capital T) Truth.” As a regular person in 2011, you only have to go so far as throwing the word “guru” after the word “social media” (mouthbarf) in your Twitter bio. But as a celebrity it takes a little bit more work: You must write a book. And if you happen to be a lady celebrity, it has to be [...]