Posts Tagged: blah magazine
8

BLAH Magazine: The Summer Issue

Beach Blanket Blah

How will you spend the summer? A reader poll:

• Standing in front of an open grocery freezer, staring at a box of two-stick popsicles and wondering aloud about who will be my Popsicle twin – 16 %

• The seasons changed? I didn’t realize – 23 %

• Sitting in front of the air conditioner with a blanket and hot tea – 18 %

• Thinking about getting highlights and then not getting them because we’re all going to die anyway – 29 %

• In denial – 14 %

Getting in Shape for Summer

With the days getting hotter, you might be forced to confront the [...]

6

BLAH Magazine's Spring Issue: Let's Get Equi-Noxious

Dear BLAH Girls,

The response to our first issue was overwhelming. And not in a good way! See, this is why we usually avoid doing stuff: doing nothing ensures a perfect record of non-failure.

But anyway, we’ve gone and done a thing, so it’s all downhill from here. If you do read on, I recommend opening a tutorial on how to make your hair do beachy waves in a separate browser window and toggling back and forth—at least that way you’ll learn something.

Or not. Do what you want. If you need me I’ll be searching for errant Teddy Grahams lodged between the couch cushions.

—Your editor

Sunlight [...]

19

BLAH: A Lifestyle Magazine for the Depressed Woman

Are You a BLAH Girl? Take Our Quiz and Find Out! Pick the phrase that best describes how you feel about yourself on a typical day:

a) My 12-year-old self would be disappointed b) Mayor of Crap Town c) Have lost all connection with self, am dry husk d) This isn’t a good time

Getting Out of Bed

What fresh hell is this? Oh, daytime. Is there a point? Well, can you still feel the crushing weight of existential dread pressing down, forcing the air from your lungs until each breath is more shallow and desperate? Yes?

Congratulations, there is no point. Hit the snooze button just right [...]