Posts Tagged: barbies

Make These Dolls Do It

"How Do You Do It?" is a game that was made for you to revert to your eight-year-old perverted self. You wait for mom to leave on an errand, you go to your Barbie and your Ken doll, and you reenact the scene from Titanic by smashing pieces of plastic together. Oh, you never did this as a kid? You're lying. (NSFW, probably, because that would be weird for you, to get caught making dolls have sex at work, I think. So really, nothing has changed; we are all still eight-year-old weirdos.) [Nina's Games]


If "Starry Night" Were a Barbie

Mattel's "Art Barbie" series — featuring a Klimt, a Da Vinci, and a Van Gogh Barbie — will be available in July, and all three dolls are currently available for $38 preorder. One of them is not like the others.



The Barbie Beauty Pageant

"It is a sort of symbiosis — you become something strange there, and it is like your daughter, but at the same time you are you, and you create its personality." These dolls, and their Venezuelan fathers, are simply magical.


Toy Guns, Barbies, Open Pill Bottles…

Andie Fox, on her failed toy gun ban:

Since that night I have been either giving up or making well-considered peace with him; I never can tell with my parenting. In my head I played with some of the moratoriums I saw other parents use: no assault rifle toys, but ninja swords and pirate muskets could be historically charming enough to be okay. I also considered the rule some parents have made about not allowing toy guns, but turning a blind eye to sticks and pieces of toast that make pew pew noises.

What was/is verboten in your home? My husband was welcome to pick off squirrels, unsupervised, [...]


Architect Barbie to Be a Barbie at Last

She's going to come with a tiny version of The Fountainhead, and she's going to be an asshole. "There is not a person in New York City who should be allowed to live in this dreamhouse," she'll say if you press her back. Also, "If you want my advice, Peter, you've made a mistake already. By asking me. By asking anyone. Never ask dolls. Not about your work. Don't you know what you want? How can you stand it, not to know?" And if you put her in a drawer she'll build something to set herself free, and then hiss at you from the opened drawer, "You know that I [...]


Barbie Has an iPhone

This is Computer Engineer Barbie, or Blogger Barbie, as I'm going to think of her from now on. Blogger Barbie comes with a pink laptop, pink iPhone — an upgrade from the pink brick thing she once had — matching pink watch and glasses, and a very cool blazer/t-shirt combo that has a computer and a handful of flying pink QWERTY keys on it. (I know the first thing I'm taking OFF Blogger Barbie when someone sends me her in the mail as a present, because really she's only $12.99 and to give is often more rewarding than to receive.)


Barbie's Friend's Bangs Ruin Wedding Album

What up! This one's for the dudes.


Spot the Differences Between 1990s Barbie and 2000s Barbie

1. Her back is more arched.

2. She has a head.

3. She dyed her underwear flesh-colored.

4. She got bikini-cut underwear instead of the hi-rise ones. (What are those called, thigh-cut?)


The Farrah Fawcett Barbie Doll

A doll inspired by the poster teenage boys liked many years ago will be available in wide release in February of 2011, but in the meantime the prototype is now on sale for $1,500. Be aware it is "for the adult collector" and that the "multi-stripe blanket" is included. But it looks like you'll have to make your own nipples out of grains of salt or whatever. Tiny bits of a mechanical pencil?