As part of our ongoing series of conversations with animals on policy and population control issues, we recently sat down with Anne, a Gunnison sage grouse living in Utah.
Us: Hi, Anne.
Anne: O THE ROSY-FINGERED DAWN! O HERALD OF THE MORNING!
Us: Is this a bad time? Who's he?
Anne's Special Friend: MY DARLING! LET US GREET THIS NEW DAY TOGETHER!
Us: Oh. Ohhhh. Um, we can come back?
Anne: POP THOSE AIR SACS AT ME.
Anne's Special Friend: You want me to fan my tail, too?
Anne: You know it, baby.
Us: I mean, we only have an hour or so in Moab to get this interview [...]
South Africa study finds donkey meat sold as beef.
What will they find in meat tomorrow? Somewhere an olive oil wizard and his public relations team are sharing seven celebratory glasses of wine and a handful of nuts.
As part of our ongoing series of conversations with animals on policy and population control issues, we recently sat down with Whale, a humpback whale currently based off the coast of Alaska.
Us: Hi, Whale.
Whale: Long time no talk, huh? It's been…twenty years?
Us: I know! I'm sorry. I grew up.
Whale: It's okay. This is what happens. Being a whale, particularly being, you know, more of a metaphor for childish wonder and exploration, I'm used to it. 30 Rock! That movie with Jeff Daniels. It's like being the Velveteen Rabbit, or something. What brought you back?
Us: The baby had a stomach bug, so I found a bunch [...]
"[Crabs] were willing to give up their hideaway in order to avoid the source of their probable pain." —More evidence that crustaceans don't want to become lobster/crab rolls/sandwiches in the way they likely will, or ever. For all the misery in the world, is it possible that there have been equal and opposite moments of greatness? Or is there more darkness than light, in which case is this whole thing another planet's 'Cabin in the Woods'? Or are we all alone with our disgusting mess? Also: Is there a word for people who only eat meat that they've killed themselves?