Posts Tagged: advice

Precious Emotional Energy, Getting a Haircut, and The Gay Man's Crush-o-Meter

Last winter I went to an art museum with my mom and girlfriend. We ran into a lady who frequented my place of work (retail). We'd always been friendly and had known each other (in a work-customer relationship way) for a few years. I’ll call her "Jane". Jane approached us to say hi, and I introduced my girlfriend.

Jane: Ooh, girlfriend? As in, a friend or a mate? Because my daughter just told me she has a girlfriend and that she's fluid! Are you fluid? What does that even mean? Me: That means she isn’t attracted to just one gender. Jane: Oh! So, let me ask you something, I'm [...]


Clean Killjoys, A Lack of Chill, and Crop Tops

Hi guys! Classic Hairpin advice column "Ask a Lady" is back and I am very excited to announce that this time the Lady is me, your friend Monica Heisey. As an anxious and bossy person (great combo), I basically live to over-analyze situations and offer life suggestions based on that analysis. I have even written a how-to book about generally being alive, a little volume called I Can't Believe It's Not Better, which you can buy in Canadian bookstores after April 28th and in American bookstores in September.

In the meantime, I have tried my best to answer a few pressing questions from [...]


Keeping it in Your Professional Pants, "The Window," and Telepathic Hints

I have such a crush on my intern. I'm not her supervisor, though I'm a senior person on a team that she is also on, so I'm in a leadership role in relation to her. I'm only two years older than she is. She is so ambiguously queer I can't even stand it. We either have extremely subtle, almost-undetectable queer-girl sexy eye contact going on, or I am *totally imagining everything.* When she leaves our office at the end of the school year, can I ask her out? TBH I don't actually want to date her, just make out with her. I really don't want to be a creep, or [...]