In just under two months, I’m going to a wedding where I’ll be seeing my ex-boyfriend for the first time since we broke up. So naturally, I want to look bangin’ and make him drool a little and tug at the heart strings, etc.
How do I stay warm, not feel like a weeble and not spend an extra 20 minutes putting on pants?
Talk to me about the essential wardrobe to build in my 30s, a timeline, and a how to do so on a public servant salary.
Skip ahead to 1:15 for how to get the pretty, office-appropriate eye; to 6:35 for the colorful, peacock-y eye; and to 12:20 for the classic smoky eye.
YES! If not every day — and then I would ask you, “Why not every day?” — then at least if you know you’re going to have your picture taken or you care generally about being as beautiful as possible. Like, if you see models and actresses and think, “If only I had her cheekbones!” and you are NOT wearing highlighter, you are playing yourself. But if you don’t ever think that, then no.
I keep telling myself that tights with shorts are off-limits because I did that trend the last time around, when I was 21 — 20 years ago. But all the cute shorts I keep seeing (and lack of appealing skirts/dresses) are tempting me to second-guess that decision.
I need help with finding a good natural (and preferrably animal-friendly!) shampoo and conditioner. I’ve found some natural shampoos I like (Beauty Without Cruelty is decent) but the conditioners are always thin and leave my long, fine but abundant hair super tangled by the end of the day. This is troublesome because I try to wear my hair wavy with some light texturizing product but then if it’s tangled and I try to brush it the style is ruined. I feel like if I had a nice conditioner that made my hair a little more silky, I’d be able to keep my mitts off. Help!
Also, how does one figure out what color tights/nylons/stockings/what have you to wear with what?
Nail polish — I’ve been unreasonably squicked out by it for far too long now, but all the girly blogs I’ve been reading have worn me down. Problem is, I gravitate towards the sheer, pale, pinky stuff and it NEVER goes on right! No matter how many coats I do (OK, so I’ve never gone beyond two really. See: lazy) it looks streaky and uneven. What’s the trick?
I need the perfect t-shirt. The sort of t-shirt that’s tissue-soft but still manages to not be totally see-through. I want to dress like a cool California girl.
Embarrassing problem here — butt acne. What do I do about it?
Here’s my philosophy: only freeboob for a reason — to create a certain silhouette, because straps would ruin the look, because you’re trying to get laid, etc. Never freeboob out of laziness — you can leave that to the 23-year-olds. When you try on clothes that might work without a bra, look in the mirror and think, “but would I feel better about this if I were Bianca Jagger?”
Would you characterize this as HIGHBROW content? Hahahaha, get it? Ugh, sorry.