air travel

Go Visit Your Contraband

Where your corkscrew lives on without you. What have you left in the bin of death, and how often does it cross your mind?


Everyone Remain Calm

To be an "unruly" passenger these days likely means one of three things: exhibiting violent or dangerous behavior that could pose a security risk; engaging in confrontational behavior with the flight crew that might escalate throughout the trip; or, unwittingly signaling to the flight crew that a problem could develop en route.

Hours too late for some passengers, MSNBC has attempted to make clear two of the three ways you could be considered "unruly" the next time you fly, but what is that third way they're talking about? I unwittingly signal to everyone that a problem could develop anywhere all day long. I guess double the Valium [...]


Flying the Other Classes

It happened to me yesterday: a business class seat on a five hour flight. No, I didn't buy the ticket or upgrade or anything like that, but it happened. Here are some things about not flying coach that may be obvious to some people, but are very exciting when they actually happen to the rest of us: You get ear plugs and eye masks. You can have a glass of "champagne" while the plane is still at the gate. They hand out menus for dinner. There are breakable dishes. There are quilts. There is Toblerone. And there are all these other people getting the same stuff and you're like "I [...]


Metric Conversion Errors Can Be Costly

Not everyone finds reading about plane crashes as fascinating as I do. Nor should you, because people die, and that's really bad. So here, instead, we have a casualty-free air NEAR-disaster of particular merit.

The Gimli Glider incident of 1983 was like the logical end-result of being super-bad at those "so and so leaves such and such place at four pm, when will he intersect other loser who left blah blah at other time" high school math problems.

I mean, the first issue, right, is the fuel gauge was busted. But Air Canada's policy was that if the fuel was measured on the ground, you could still fly with [...]


No, Really, This Poor Guy Died

Well, it finally happened. Another lesson in the merits of a strict "peanut M&Ms and alcohol only" policy while airborne.