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Monday, April 7, 2014

20

April Horoscopes from Galactic Rabbit

Dearest Starbunnies,

O April is the cruelest, I know. Too many days it took me to catch these thoughts for you. 'Tis hard to be a crystal whilst suffering Spring plague. 'Tis not hard to slip into this silly, affected voice. Okay, I'll stop fooling around: here is what I have for you, my Spring hares! Before you search for your personal sign, I would like to avail you of some key planetary information. This April presents us with a Cardinal Cross. What is that? That is when the four cardinal signs: Aries (Uranus), Cancer (Jupiter), Capricorn (Pluto) and Libra (retro Mars) form a square in the sky! They will be exactly 90 degrees or 180 (across) from each other. That is a lot of cardinal energy! The energy of change is fueled by the influences of each sign, each planet that’s inhabiting it, and in the year of the Horse, of course! There will also be a solar and lunar eclipse. Are you ready for all that moon jelly? Well, get ready! You can take a look at this site for some more Cardinal Cross info.  Now! Behold my love notes.

XO, Galactic Rabbit (with sniffles)

Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19): Unfathomable creature, are you the righteous goat bleating against the boundaries set before you, or the fishtailed water dweller: sealing cracks as you discover them, mending the machine as it turns? Cardinal Capricorn, you might not know it yet but there is a great cosmic conspiracy in the works, and it’s got you quartered, tied to elements beyond your control: wild fires, large egos, emotions that well up from an endless fount. Capricorn, for years you have been living under the dark shadow of a planet you do not belong to. Everything in you craves change, knows how to build something out of what feels like nothing. Don’t despair, wonder-animal. If there is a fire to your left, then make the meal you’ve been craving. If there is an impossible project to your right, then master it. If before you stands a straight shot to whatever love is, then step forward, Capricorn, and claim it.

Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18): Aquarius, I’ve noticed something about you: sometimes you forget that you are not water but the strong wind that bears it. This comes up often, over coffee shop talk or late night drinks. You lean over, heavy with the river of emotions, and ask: how can it weigh so much? Aquarius, in this cosmos we are all trying our best (whether you’ve spent all day praying to Netflix or not) and anytime you want you can rest your arms and lay that river down. This isn’t permission I’m granting you. This is a reminder. You are the intake and outtake of breath that calms the heart down to a steady pace. Remember, when you are still, the needs of others will flow toward you. Sometimes the best kind of friend we can be is the kind that retreats to take care. How else can you gather the strength you need to direct the currents of this world?

Pisces (Feb 19-Mar 20): Oh, my magic fish. You have been swimming in a whirlpool lately, haven’t you? Could you be any more resilient? Well, yes, of course you could, so mutable, so open to what the world has to offer. But just because you could doesn’t mean you should. Maybe this month you should spend some time out of the water. What I mean is, your element, the murky depths, filmy sea bottom: it’s beautiful, but it might be killing you. I’m not about to go into some toxicity metaphor here, no degradation. I’m just going to suggest that it wouldn’t hurt you to spend some time in the sun, taking things for what they are and nothing more than that. It might, in fact, give you some relief. And if you want a warning video, “What Now” by Rihanna is a Piscean feeling I just don’t wish for you.

Aries (Mar 21-Apr 19): Aries, I know you’ve been waiting for something magnificent to happen, for the world to crack open and swallow you up or spit you out into another galaxy altogether. Patience isn’t your strongest virtue, and to speed up the Next Big Thing you’ve been keeping your ax to the grindstone, sweating as small fires fly up off your wheel. You electrify the air and your dedication is un-matched. Aries, you deserve the rewards you’ve been working so hard for, and you are most certainly going to get them, in time. Let’s take a long walk, around the park after the dark, find a spot for us to spark. That’s me singing you some Jill Scott because she’s an Aries who seems real relaxed. Take a minute to collect your energy and lend those sparks to a good fire. Sit yourself down in front of it and enjoy what you’ve made. When you move with intention, you move closer to what you’ve been dreaming of.

Taurus (Apr 20-May 20): Dear Taurus: thank you. Thank you for showing me that dreams are achievable and that the only way to pursue them is to turn them into matter: physical work, tangible material. Your work ethic is outstanding and I applaud it. What concerns me is how often your work ethic cloaks your fear of self-examination. Last month must have felt endless for you, pushing through the remnants of winter’s shroud energy, ready to turn the earth over and welcome spring. Did you overcommit out there? Were you too eager to make sure that your date book left no time for reflection so that you might catapult quickly into the re-birth energy of spring? Well, spring is here, and I think you may have rushed into it. I think you need to take a moment and restock. Are you taking care of the small soft bull in your heart? Does she feel as powerful as you act?

Gemini (May 21-Jun 20): Hey Twinstar, how are you? Take a minute before you answer and consider that we are fictional to each other, that I could be anyone. Does that make it easier or harder for you to approach me with the truth? In a diner booth drenched with sun, on a street anywhere in America, I am sharing a piece of pie and some black coffee with you. I am waiting for you to bare some small part of your darker self without fear. The people around you, the ones who love you, see you. They celebrate your easy laugh, your uncanny wit, your undeniable talent. But they are also waiting for the other side to come out: the side that feels confused about the future, weighed down with incessant insecurity. Consider that Alanis Morissette made her fame with Jagged Little Pill, a dark, weird, absurd pop album. All the enlightened bullshit she produced thereafter just couldn’t compare. Sometimes our dark selves are our best selves.

Cancer (Jun 21-Jul 22): Everything’s going to be okay. That’s what you wanted to hear, isn’t it, Cancer? Well, that’s what I’m here to tell you. Of course, there’s the human condition, the fact that most everything is "okay," relatively speaking. Like Missy Elliot, you can’t stand the rain, but it’s April, so! Listen, instead of worrying so much about how everything is going to be, take a minute to recognize how it is. Surely there is a lot that is going right. Jupiter has been shining down on you for long enough to have some effect: strokes of good luck, moments of perfect synchronicity, a large goal checked off here and there. Truth is, you are going to find yourself getting pulled in a couple of directions: the cusp of great change, debilitating indecision, surges of great willpower. Ride them through toward you dreams, Cancer, you’re more powerful than you let yourself believe

Leo (Jul 23-Aug 22): Hey Lioness. Did you know that Kate Bush is going back on tour? I know! It’s been at least 35 freakin’ years but she’s getting on that spotlight pony like it was waiting for her all this time (it probably was). Here’s what I think: maybe it’s the season of Leo resurgence, our proto weirdo-nymph out there like a banner. One Leo calls to another, the way Kate called up Emily Bronte from the grave with "Wuthering Heights." Lions everywhere are finally waking from their slumber, stretching their big furry paws, and taking up their rightful places amongst their respective prides. I know you will say, "But some Leos are quiet stars." Oh yes, I know your kind. And even you shy lions have a starring role to play. Don’t you think you’ve spent enough time whiling away your days getting ready?

Virgo (Aug 23-Sep 22): It’s easy, isn’t it, Virgo? You put on your jauntiest cap, your biggest toughest boots, your wind-breaker and you’re off to make life what you want it to be! If only, Virgo. Here is a comic I have for you. That Alison Bechdel has got her Virgo thing going on. What better way to escape Virgo depressive mind erosion than by diving deep into fiction? Of course! Just make sure the fiction is not one you are writing with your life. Otherwise you run the risk of coming home every evening with a face that aches from smiling and a chest that aches from, well, aching. Having those two going at once is a confusion your soul would do best to avoid. It may sound hokey but take a long bath, Virgo, light a candle, write a journal entry, let your connection to yourself be the strongest connection you have.

Libra (Sep 23-Oct 22): Libra! Look, you made it! Through last month I mean. Even through Mars is still going retrograde all up in you, I believe you have mastered the art of that disaster. Maybe I am making it up, but I get the feeling that you are regularly traversing the path towards your heart’s deepest truth. I mean serious traversing: bindle on a stick, bladder full of water, thumb out to the open road. And, because of this idea I have of you, I often admire your ability to move quietly amongst the rest of us. You can charm your way out of someone else’s shadow and make just the right joke at just the right time. You’re so good at appearing fine. Sometimes I wonder who really knows you. Is there anyone you meet on your path that is allowed to come along and bear witness to your personal journey? Libra, you don’t always have to go at it alone.

Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21): Hey Scorpio, I just watched The Punk Singer (I KNOW! WHY DID I WAIT SO LONG??). There was one moment with Kathleen (a Scorpio, of course; duh; what else?) that resonated with me so deeply I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And the Hairpin captured the exact moment in an interview, and here it is: “I needed to get used to the sound of my own voice, and I think that’s what makes a girl’s bedroom special. You can make whatever you want when you’re alone in your room. There are all these different girls' bedrooms and all these girls are making their stuff, and then they’re throwing it away…” Oh Scorpio, maybe you’re like me. Maybe you didn’t have your own bedroom growing up. Maybe it’s hard for you to make something you feel is good enough to keep. I think it’s time you, too, got used to the sound of your own voice. I think it’s time you made something like you were born to make it, go after something like you were born to have it.

Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21): Dear Sagittarius: goodness, am I glad to know you. There are days when you are a beacon of genuine light at the end of a very affected tunnel. Self-assured, honest, direct and to the point. I know that not everyone sees this side of you. Often, you come off as something else entirely. It’s your mutable nature, you adapt. This is how you survive social drama and avoid confrontation. Well, Sagittarius, in the wake of all this cosmic chaos: the cardinal cross, the solar and lunar eclipse, you are definitely left standing strong (nervous, but strong). Your adaptive skills are going to serve you well. Of course, you know that something has got to change. You’re not happy where you are, you’re just waiting for the right time to act as your strongest self. Let the planetary dance settle into its rhythm before you string your bow and aim your arrow.

Gala Mukomolova is a poet ruled by Pluto, a planet in our hearts.



20 Comments / Post A Comment

rebecca the brave

SHE'S HEEEEEEEEEEEEERE she's here.

novak

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay finally! and great news this month!

Shara

FINALLY!! And thank GOD everything's going to be okay.

adorable-eggplant

High-fives all around, fellow libras!

bitzyboozer

I like this month's way better than last. And as a Libra who did take a bit of a galactic beating last month I'm ready to believe.

large__marge

As a Cap who is finishing grad school and staring down a whole ton of changes in the coming months, all I can say is, BRING IT.

up cubed

@large__marge: Capricorn, for years you have been living under the dark shadow of a planet you do not belong to
It is so relevant that it hurts my heart.

adorable-eggplant

@large__marge The capricorn in my life is also getting ready to graduate. I really hope this part is on the nose: "If before you stands a straight shot to whatever love is, then step forward, Capricorn, and claim it."

mochi

galactic rabbit, making me tear up(in a good way).

supernintendochalmers

GR does the best horoscopes. Hit home for this Libra.

Mavis

@supernintendochalmers They are the best I've ever read. And it hit home for a fellow Libra. I was so proud that I got to the end without crying and then BOOM. Dead on, Galactic Rabbit.

meetapossum

"Everything’s going to be okay. That’s what you wanted to hear, isn’t it, Cancer?"

...it sure is.

Cat named Virtute

@meetapossum High five, lady. Amen.

cei-face

@meetapossum It's like, how do they knoooooooow

LydiaBennett

@meetapossum Late to the party here but yes, NEEDED that.

Statham

Man. Mine is spot on and exactly what I needed to read. I want it like, on a post it that I can read all the time.

In fact...this might need to go on my fridge.

large__marge

@Statham I've taped all of my 'pin horoscopes to my monitor at work.

roseandthen

"Ride them through toward you dreams, Cancer, you’re more powerful than you let yourself believe"

LearyJ

Pretty sharp post. It made me giggle incessantly! fitness vacation

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