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Wednesday, November 20, 2013

14

Ask Baba Yaga: Last Year I Met the Love of My Life During Harrowing Circumstances

Transcript after the jump.

Dearest Baba Yaga,

Last year I met the love of my life during harrowing circumstances. As we fell in love, he was also falling into a deep depression. When he hit rock bottom, our "we" had to end so he could heal on his own. I don't know how long that will take, or if he will ever be with me again. How do I place my love for him to the side, so I can try making room for another?

BABA: Love cannot be so easily placed aside — where would you put it? ;No — the love will work through you in its grieving ways & spell its strange and painful phantasms through yr body. But waiting you must not do. Nothing,is coming for you. It is only you moving( forward and around , & there will be fine makings for you as you do so. But you cannot conjure another to do yr bidding.

Previously: There's Got to Be a Way to Exist Without Constantly Inflating and Deflating My Ego

Taisia Kitaiskaia is a poet, writer, and Michener Center for Writers fellow. She's taking questions on behalf of Baba Yaga at AskBabaYaga@gmail.com.



14 Comments / Post A Comment

stonefruit

"Where would you put it?" Indeed, Baba. Indeed.

carolinaclay

Such an awesome article! @y

Sarah Librarian

Happened to me this Summer. Except partner had a manic episode and as soon as I said no to him, he left and ended it. Just. Like. That. It took the entire Summer and part of Fall for me to process it. I've never had a relationship just stop like that and with mental illness its nearly impossible to place too much blame. But it hurt so much at the time.

Briony Fields

@Sarah Librarian Ahhhhhh, a similar thing is happening to me, it just happened 3 weeks ago. Minus the manic episode, but basically some emotional problems manifested and what seemed like a wonderful relationship ended very abruptly because of them. He was really the love of my life, or so it felt. I'm so sad I just pretty much want to stop existing.

adorable-eggplant

@Briony Fields You'll pull through! But be gentle with yourself in the meanwhile. Hugs!

Briony Fields

@adorable-eggplant That actually means a lot. Thanks! *sob*

nebula

@Sarah Librarian and @Briony-Fields, the question to Baba Yaga was from me. The abruptness is terrible, I feel for you both. It was the feeling of being blindsided that made it take so long for me to recover. Sending out love to you two.

Barracuda

@everyone

Hugs hugs hugs to everyone. <3

Briony Fields

@nebula Being blindsided - YES. The worst part.

It sounds like things are going better for you now, which is nice to hear. Thanks for your comforting words!

Barracuda

Oh, Baba Yaga, I need to heed your words. Just after the Iraq war started, I met the brother of a friend online. Chit chatted here and there, no biggie, we all chatted online, eh? We met in person and talked for a few minutes at an event in 2006. We ran into each other again at an event in 2009. Afterwards, he or I found each other on Facebook and he asked for my number. He started calling me from time to time and it was nice. I took it to a friendly interaction as he was living four time zones away. I finally figured out that he liked me. We spoke more intimately and the mutual attraction grew. Now, he's on the same coast and buried in PhD stuff. He said to me, "As pretty as you are and as much as we get along, I'm not dating anyone right now. I'm afraid it would be a few fun months of a very physical relationship and I'm trying to get away from that behavior. I need to get my head screwed on straight."

He's so smart and funny. He volunteers with little kids at an after school program for robotics/engineering. He was an Air Force pararescueman for years (read: the person(s) that extract wounded military personnel from behind enemy lines aka badass). Some of the people trained him for that job trained me as a youngster. He communicates simply, getting right to the point. He is gentle with me.

I go on dates here and there, but so far, very few compel me that way he does. I wish and do not wish to wash him out of my hair.

WilmaGrajs00

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mikealbert

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