Wednesday, October 9, 2013


Grimes' Tour Rider: "If possible, one cute bulldog, french bulldog, pug or pomeranian to visit & hang out"

More of her very environmentally-friendly rider is up at her Tumblr (no disposable silverware or plates allowed, no individually-sized water bottles, the artist and crew will bring their own). It all seems very reasonable, especially the bulldog part; last year, Noisey collected a few more ridiculous ones (Trent Reznor requested two "VERY IMPORTANT" boxes of cornstarch, Queen Latifah asked for a 12-piece KFC bucket and a 12-pack of Rough Rider condoms, Britney Spears asked for bunless McDonald's burgers and a framed photo of Princess Diana).

What would be on your tour rider? Mine would definitely include a dog or two. St. Bernards, though, with some booze tied around their necks as God intended.

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Lily Rowan

The cornstarch is for leather pants, right?


@Lily Rowan does it keep you from sweating in them? i am imagining a coating of corn starch goo beneath trent reznor's leather pants and crying.

and now i just googled it and it says corn starch is for cleaning? help i'm so confused

Lily Rowan

@j-i-a Oh god, I don't know. I'm sure there's a fine line between enough to slide in and too much that makes goo!

Corn starch is for everything.


@Lily Rowan Ooooh! Pick me! I know the answer! Trent and the other band members douse themselves and their clothes liberally in corn starch before shows to create a dusty, post-apocalyptic look. I saw it in a documentary years ago, so I assume this is still the case. Unless Trent now uses it to prepare Cook's Country's recipe for Honey Fried Chicken, which uses only corn starch as a batter!

Lily Rowan

@FlufferNutter OK, that's way better than my guess!


@FlufferNutter oh my god that is so interesting


Very interesting@t


I would volunteer my very cute chi mix to hang out . . .


I didn't even really like Grimes at first, but her consistent awesomeness has forced me to keep giving her music more and more chances over the years, which, I'm totally glad I have.


@leonstj As Grimes newbie, what should I listen to first?


@DairyCat I like this remix a lot!


@DairyCat - I dunno really a best song, but what I do w/ music that kind of interests me but I have a hard time getting into is playing it in the background when I'm just around my house, cooking or cleaning or reading or whatever off and on for awhile.

For me, once some of the grooves / vibe sorta bake into familiarity, I'm a lot more able to enjoy music (I call it 'the bodega effect', and it's why 'new/hip' bands I like are always sold out of their first local shows by the time I decide I like them). But I'm totally uncool & a cheesy dork who likes to feel comfortable w/ music, so, ya know, your mileage &c.

(oh and i also really love http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5t9qeEPskYM avi on her i think first record)

A. Louise

@DairyCat I really like this live recording of Circumambient - it's just amazing. I think her music videos are pretty great as well, just because they're very visual and bizarre. The more interviews & social media I watch/read from this young lady the more I like her and her music - she's smart and pragmatic when it comes to the industry but very much her own quirky self and willing to backtrack and call out her own faults, which is refreshing.

Also she's into Pokemon and Game of Thrones, so I like to think if we ever met we'd have a lot in common.


@leonstj try listening to Oblivion and Vanessa! Those two both have videos and are pretty "easy" to listen to, if that makes sense... you have probably even heard Oblivion before, somewhere.

jaimebee tho

I LOVE HOSPITALITY RIDERS OMG. I think if I were a famous musician with the ability to make a LIST OF BACKSTAGE DEMANDS, I'd totally squander all potential for glamour and luxury and just request, like, a bunch of chips ahoy cookies & vanilla soy milk. And ribs. Hell of bbq ribs.

Oliver St. John Mollusc

@jaimebee tho Oooh let's all make imaginary hospitality riders! I love this game! I think mine would include pickles, a big bowl of popcorn, Shiner Bock, and either paper dolls or a coloring book.


@Oliver St. John Mollusc omg


@Oliver St. John Mollusc ok i just added that to the post. here is my tour rider:

12 st. bernard pups with booze barrel necklaces
someone to take care of any puppy issues
grilled cheeses
coco cafes
paint by numbers also featuring puppies
[redacted for illegality]
bob ross DVD
a big giant hotel bathrobe

jaimebee tho

@j-i-a this game is EVERYTHING and also omg 12 ST BERNARD PUPS

I'm going to add to mine:
- a bowl of grapes and sliced asian pears
- a few v chill parakeets flying around, assorted colors
- 1 beagle puppy, mostly asleep
- 1 paperback copy of The Outsiders
- a book of fairly-easy crossword puzzles and a really good pen

I think we nailed it, guys. I think we really did.


Grimes if you want to hang out with a corgi I can hook you up.


Don't front like you wouldn't request a puppy if you had the chance.


@iceberg Uh, yeah. I mean, puppy.


@iceberg I'm frankly amazed that she was able to restrain herself to requesting just ONE puppy. This is a genius idea


@iceberg The problem is if you put "a puppy" on your rider that puppy gets chucked at a shelter the next morning, if not just let loose in the alley out back.

"it is important... they have a safe home to return to" is not exactly enforceable.


I feel like I've heard that artists often request at least one totally ridiculous thing because if whoever's putting the show on gets the 12-bowls-of-ONLY-red-smarties right then they probably got all the bigger, more important things right? Has anyone else heard this?


@supernovice I think it was Van Halen and the bowl without brown M&Ms that this particular explanation comes from.


now exactly how trust worthy David Lee Roth is when it comes to this explanation? Who knows. but it does sound kind of reasonable if it actually was placed in the middle of the technical section and not the hospitality section.

Iggy Pop's rider is amazing by the way:


@supernovice Yes, this is true! Even less iconically famous nationally touring bands often do this, from what I understand (They Might Be Giants has talked about it, for one). Like, yeah, tech problems can totally fuck up a show and you don't always know what you're getting into with venues; seems like sound practice.

My imaginary rider (as an actual but very much non-big-time musician):
Drinking fountain placed discreetly to the side of the stage so I don't have to fiddle with water bottles or worry about knocking over cups
A firm but comfortable piece of furniture to stretch out on in the green room
A thing of cashews

. . . I guess that's about it?


@supernovice I came here to post exactly this! I just read it in a book. The story is that Van Halen would request a bowl of only green M&M's in their dressing room, and if it wasn't there they'd lose their shit, which to the rational outside observer sounds like celebrities just being spoiled and weird -- but in reality they were using it as a tripwire of sorts. They were on tour and so were going from venue to venue with these hugely complex shows that came with long lists of very detailed instructions that were sent in advance to the venues. They would bury the M&M's request somewhere deep in the instructions, and the idea was that if they could come into their dressing room and immediately see the bowl of green M&M's, they could rest easy that the venue had read the instructions carefully and were following all the instructions. If they didn't see the green M&M's, then the venue had probably missed other stuff that was actually important. That is freaking brilliant, if you ask me.


Grimes, will she suffice?? IMG 20120719 173722

(Simply and excuse to see all y'alls' bulldogs!)


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