Quantcast

Friday, September 13, 2013

213

Friday Open Thread

Today we say farewell to summer Fridays and hello to 5 p.m. Open Threads. How do we live, even? Anyway, this will catch you up on the week that was:

• We talked to AHP's mom, and Arisce Wanzer, a transgender model. An important takeaway from the latter:

No, I’ve always been boy crazy! I just love boys. I think they’re so cute, and also so awful, they’re just the worst for you.

• We got over a breakup or two, and quit cardio.

• We started to understand the bros. OK, not really.

DIY? DIY!

• What happens when a man writes a woman? What happens when Cormac McCarthy reviews Miley Cyrus videos?

• Jared Sabbagh's epic sexual history came to a close, for now.

• We engaged our cores, and, um, a dickhole.

See you back here Monday.

Screengrab via.



213 Comments / Post A Comment

iceberg

This week with the Bergy Bits:

Crying for the usual reasons, although this morning at about 5:30 the Diva woke her brother up with her sleep-crying, so he got her back:
"I eat all the cookies!"
"No, [Clown]! No eat my cookies!"
"[Diiivaaa], I eat all the cookies!"
(sing-song voice accompanied by sly grin)

The other night, Diva swanned into the house and proclaimed confidently "I want too many cookies!"

The Quiet One poked me in the belly button and said "You got a big ol' butt!"
I didn't know whether to be insulted, or impressed at her knowledge of the classics.

A conversation I am having way too often when I catch a child stop what they're doing and stand still staring off into space:
"[Bergy Bit], what are you doing?"
"I pooping!"

A conversation I can never get enough of, every morning dropping them off at daycare:
"Mama, I need a huggakiss!"

Also, my mum is visiting, so the Bergy Bits are getting extra attention and affection and LOVING it.

stonefruit

@iceberg "Amanda Hugginkiss! Hey, I'm lookin' for Amanda Hugginkiss! Oh, why can't I find Amanda Hugginkiss?!"

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@iceberg So I was randomly thinking about your "OMG" situation last week, and decided I would tell you that teaching the Bergy Bits to say "Cheese and crackers!" might be hilarioua.

SarahP

@iceberg !!! I want too many cookies, too, Bergy Bit!

vittoriama

That's so cool! @v

frigwiggin

This has been A Week.

frigwiggin

Well, A Week of good things (Dad visiting, finally Hairpin published, wooooooo~) and also not-so-great things (mostly workwise). Who else can feel their brain slowly leaking out of their ears?

Jinxie

@frigwiggin OH, ME {waves hand frantically}. I am just done with people and work and work people and my roommate and her sick cat and I would really like to run away and be alone for a few days to recharge.
But to end on a positive note: hooray to you for getting published on the 'Pin! I hope you're celebrating this weekend :)

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@frigwiggin Me! I took a sick day this week so that I could get some rest and whatnot. It was the first time I've called in sick to any job ever.

Also congratulations! How wonderful! (That was sincere, but maybe the exclamation points were a little off-putting.)

siniichulok

@frigwiggin Me! Me! Though in my case it's because all I ever do is nurse my baby and eat. And spend lots of time having a conversation that goes like this:

Him: [Looks deep into my eyes]: "Ghii!"
Me: "Ghii!"
Him: [Grins, waggles his little butt]: "GHHH!"
Me: "GHHH!"
Him: "GHHH! GHHIIII!" [laughs hysterically]

It's fun though. Just not very complex. I actually managed to take a shower today and feel like running around and bragging about it.

tealily

@frigwiggin Bring the beers! [What did you publish?? I'm just hopping on here now.]

frigwiggin

@frigwiggin Grahhhhh, apparently I've also lost the ability to link things properly. I wrote this gross thing!

tealily

@frigwiggin Ooooooh!!! Haha that was GREAT!

sophia_h

@siniichulok Ghi! That's totally every baby's first sound, right? In my son's case it usually means "I am really frustrated your milk is slowing down after 15 minutes and will now scream."

Hot Doom

@frigwiggin I'm so late to this, but I just wanted to say I LOVED YOUR PIECE! It was hilarious (the pillowcase one made me sputter) and is totally classic Hairpin. More from you, madam!

bevrockin

I got a new job! I start it in a couple of weeks! I was unnecessarily worried about turning in my notice but they took it just fine. In fact, they took it better than I'd have wanted. But that's part of why I'm glad to be leaving soon. Way underappreciated. Onward and upward.

And Roll Tide! Beat A&M!

tealily

@bevrockin AWESOME!! You go rock that!

Myrtle

@bevrockin They only took it well because they don't know how the work will now pile up and their questions have no one to answer them. But, you'll be lunching with new co-workers who have dishy single/available friends, and won't be available. HA HA dumb old job!!

Beaker

Let's have a happy Friday the 13th: Hairpin, what are your small victories this week? Mine are sticking to this half marathon training plan, giving a well-received lecture, and (future victory) getting an IUD Monday.

Small victories!

bevrockin

@Beaker Turning in my notice at work without crying, exercising this week after being lazy and not exercising last week, and cooking dinner twice this week instead of picking up dinner! Yay us!

adorable-eggplant

@Beaker I tried blueberry kombucha, and it was heaven.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@Beaker I have purchased some key pieces of my Halloween costume.

stonefruit

@Beaker I kicked this cold in the butt and I didn't lose my voice! (I was really worried about losing my voice b/c I need it for tonight and tomorrow.)

Briony Fields

@Beaker Taking my iron supplements every day, started a new project at work without melting down.

frigwiggin

@Beaker Remembering to take my new brain medication every day!

VolcanoMouse

@Beaker I launched an Etsy shop! It was scary and I doubt I will sell anything but I put things I made out into the aether anyway.

Beaker

@frigwiggin Man, my attempt to use positivity to mask sleepiness doesn't always work — I thought you meant you had a new brain instead of new medication FOR your brain.

I'll see myself out.

frigwiggin

@Beaker

If only, Beaker. If only.

BattyRabbit

@Beaker My small victory was successfully calling/planning/leading a last-minute meeting of the people I'm in charge of (??? whose idea was that)!

I AM PROUD OF ALL OF US

tealily

@Beaker I stayed within my budget for the week and did NOT have to put anything at all on the credit card!

yeah-elle

@Beaker A cute guy gave me his number, I saw Neko Case in concert and she was transcendent, I ate a burrito!

snowlate

@Beaker I have been careful and didn't take the stairs more than I had to in my hot aircast, didn't act catty at my direct report when he was being passive aggressive and instead addressed it professionally (he still cried though), and am making progress in my needlepoint!

Myrtle

@Beaker I unfriended and blocked a man who was super-manipulative and not of the calibre of person I want in my life. I also blocked the person he lives with, in case he tries to use that person's computer to contact me. I did it once before but that was before I learned that he's a sociopath and got manipulated into being linked again... I feel FANTASTIC!!!!!! I have my happy life back!!

Bittersweet

@yeah-elle I have tickets for the Neko Case show in Boston in November. So psyched!

This week I gave a good presentation to a group of executive MBA students, and went to the Harpoon brewery in Boston for the first time.

MrsTeacherFace

Gas pain is super traumatic when one is in the first trimester of pregnancy and paranoid about miscarriage for no real reason at all.

Everything, including frozen prepackaged lunches taste bland to me, like they need salt. Either pregnancy has broken my taste buds, or the baby is really craving sodium.

No cute new crafts are happening for the baby, but I did take one pair of maternity pants that were too long, hem them, and then attach the cutoffs to a pair that was too short, plus lace to cover up the frankenpants.

Audley

@MrsTeacherFace As someone who comes from a family of people who hate hemming, I really admire that you were not only able to get around to hemming something, but also able to do something cool with the leftovers.

tambourine

i have had possibly the most boring week of my adult life. was ok, though. but i have a v important question, which has directly led on from said boring week:

if you were going to be one of the x-men, which one would you be?

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@tambourine I want to say Jean Grey but I'm not sure why.

adorable-eggplant

@tambourine Rouge or Wolverine or Beast or Nightcrawler.

MrsTeacherFace

@tambourine I would say Gambit, because he's just awesome, but since I don't particularly want things to explode after I touch them, probably Storm, because Texas is too hot and we need more rain. Also, she can fly.

adorable-eggplant

@MrsTeacherFace Smart thinking. I change my mind and would be Storm also.

katiemcgillicuddy

@tambourine Gambit, every time.

JanieS

@tambourine Shadowcat or Storm. I want to run through walls and/or smite people with lightning.

phipsi

Your best tailgating/party/outdoor picnic recipes...GO!

bevrockin

@phipsi Always a hit: Bacon Bowties. You need cream cheese (whipped is best), bacon, and Town House crackers. Slice your bacon into thirds. Put a little cream cheese between two Town House crackers & wrap that bacon third around the middle. Repeat until you're out of bacon. Bake in the oven at around 350-375 for about 30 minutes, until the bacon starts to squeeze the cracker into a bowtie shape. You'll just want to make sure the bacon is good and done. Amazingly easy and so so so delish.

paper bag princess

@phipsi Sangria. It's super easy to make but really impressive looking. Just toss together almost any combination of fruit/wine/ice/juice/other booze if you want and it all tastes good!

adorable-eggplant

@phipsi Seven layer dip! Put things in layers. Nom nom nom. Especially important layers: refried beans and sour cream.

Briony Fields

@phipsi For picnics, anything with cold potatoes/pasta/quinoa. I make a quinoa dish with soup stock, chickpeas, fennel, olives, and lemon/orange juice.

Hot Doom

@adorable-eggplant AND GUAC.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@phipsi I got this recipe from Skinnytaste dot com, who says you can serve it as a salad (if you cut everything into big pieces) or a dip for chips (if you cut everything into small pieces):

Cut two ripe avocadoes, one cucumber, a tomato (one big one or two small ones) into cubes. Drain and rinse a can of black beans. Chop up some red onion (about a quarter of an onion should be plenty) and as much or as little cilantro as you want. Mix everything together, and use lime juice as dressing.

The recipe calls for the juice of 2 limes, which I think is more than enough. I add some salt and pepper into the lime juice for extra flavour. Also, by some weird magic, the lime juice seems to keep the avocado from turning brown!

(brb considering changing my screen name to Weird Avocado Magic)

phipsi

@Hot Doom Guac is happening already! @Briony Fields Oooh...had not thought of a non-mayo potato salad. I know a good roasted one. @bevrockin Had to google those for a pic because I couldn't envision the finished product. Sounds kind of awesome! @paper bag princess YUM love sangria. @adorable-eggplant There will be many chips'n'dips at this particular party, but that is ALWAYS a hit!

Onymous

@phipsi
In a large bowl:
shred up a 1lb of cooked chicken
add
2 sliced green/red bell peppers
2 sliced medium onions
1 cup sliced olives
1 large tsp garlic
~1 Tb paprika
~tsp salt + pepper
pour half and half (apple cider/malt/red wine, probably NOT balsamic) vinegar and olive oil over until you have enough to thoroughly coat when tossed (about a 1/4 cup each). Refrigerate over night.

adorable-eggplant

@phipsi Other class tailgating tips: Do your seven-layer dip in a glass bowl or clear tupperware. Classy.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@phipsi Oh, the website that I found that avocado salad recipe at also had a recipe for something called "BLT Macaroni Salad"! That sounds like a decent tailgating food, right? I haven't made it but it sounded good, except for the fact that the dressing was a small amount of mayo. (Mayo is delicious, but cannot be relied on to dress and flavour an entire dish on its own.)

adorable-eggplant

@phipsi It's probably too late, but I just made a crazy good party snack and it was so easy! Ingredients: a pop-can of ready to bake cinnamon rolls, a few spoonfuls of jam. I unrolled the rolls and spooned on the jam and then re-rolled them, although it might have worked just as well and have been slightly less messy to just put a dollop of jam on top, but then the jam might not have seeped out and caramelized slightly on the bottom.

I'm already thinking about other jams to try (strawberry-rhubarb, apple cinnamon) because these are so damn good.

Briony Fields

I was sitting here refreshing the page, waiting for the Open Thread so I could whine about how shitty everything is, but I got bored and went for a walk. Except it was a magical, problem fixing walk and now my list of complaints have disappeared! I mean, for this evening.

Thank you, legs. Thank you, fresh air.

adorable-eggplant

@Briony Fields Dude, walks are magic.

coolallison

@Briony Fields My therapist would be really proud of you. :)

lasso tabasco

YOU GUISE!

I just got back from spending two weeks in Dubrovnik where they are filming GoT AS WE SPEAK! I ate dinner at a table in front of Peter Dinklage and took a sneaky selfie with him over my shoulder- it was amazing. Also accidentally wandered into the backstage area of the set they were filming on one day. I cannot wait for the season to air!

In other news, I'm on Day 2 of quitting smoking. It's not as miserable as I thought it would be... yet. Please send some encouragement my way!

discombobulated

@lasso tabasco Congrats on quitting! You're awesome and can totally do this.

adorable-eggplant

@lasso tabasco Eat lots of figs, stay strong!!

Laughable Walrus

@lasso tabasco Congrats on quitting! You can do it! I mean, if you can take a sneaky selfie with Peter Dinklage, you can do ANYTHING. (Because you are obviously living my dreams.)

Briony Fields

@lasso tabasco BEYOND jealous. Good for you!

skeedaddle

@lasso tabasco Congrats on quitting smoking! I was worried when I quit because everyone kept saying that I'd never stop wanting a cigarette. Lies, all lies. It's been years and I never, ever crave a cigarette, or even think about them, really.

wallsdonotfall

Being deliberately vague about the specifics because of anonymity/privacy concerns, but what do you all think about ethics & obligations to your employers when you're considering looking for other jobs? My place of work is understaffed, and we're all very stressed out because admin won't offer us more money (non-negotiable, bureaucracy) and isn't making things easier in other ways. This makes me want to look for a higher-paying job in a for-profit, in part so that I can someday afford to have a family. But I already felt guilty about the prospect of leaving my workplace even more understaffed, and now I just heard that a coworker will be taking maternity leave/possibly leaving next spring. I know we won't be able to replace her with a temp, so I'll be doing 2x the work with no pay increase. Am I right to feel like I shouldn't leave in that case? At what point do I pack up and go?

Unrelated second question: what do you all like to do on road trips? A friend is driving a few of us 800 miles in a single day, then doing it again two days later to come home. I can't drive, so I've offered to pay for gas and bring snacks/entertainment. What's good road food? Podcasts? Dumb games?

bevrockin

@wallsdonotfall From my experience, you honestly CANNOT worry about the folks you're leaving. They will be OK there, or they will also leave. That kind of mentality keeps so many good people staying at crappy places. I will be leaving my co-workers in a semi-bad spot when I go in a couple of weeks, but they are going to be OK.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@wallsdonotfall For the road trip: Find out what her beverages and snacks of choice are! The friend I go on the most roadtrips with (who also has to do all of the driving) is a (not Red Bull) energy drinks and Timbits kind of girl.

Other good road food: Get a pack of those mini chocolate bars they've started selling for Halloween! Fresh and dried fruits, and it can be your job to keep an eye out for roadside food stands and diners.

Make epic playlists. I once made a 5-hour playlist of the greatest songs of the nineties. (Five hours is a little bit too long, just fyi.) Think of every song that's fun to sing at karaoke. Or make a playlist of only songs that are longer than 8 minutes. Pull out the mix CD's you made like ten years ago, and allow yourself to be embarrassed.

As for podcasts, anything that's relevant to the interests of the people in the car is good, especially if it can provoke a discussion. Also: trivia podcasts! I found one a few years ago that I think was called Great Beginnings, that played the first ten seconds of a song and you had to figure out what it was. So much fun.

bitchycrosstownexpress

@wallsdonotfall I was fretting about leaving my last job (which was also understaffed and about to make some big changes to my position). I started into "it's going to sucks if they get all this set up and then I leave" and my boyfriend reminded me "it will suck - for THEM. You'll have a better job." if you wait for a good time to leave, you'll be stuck forever.

angelinha

@bitchycrosstownexpress So true! There is never a good time to leave (or to dump someone). Plus, part of an organization's function is to find new staff when old staff leave. They did that before you, and they will do it again. I so understand the feeling of wanting to save the organization/be a martyr for your non-profit, but at some point, you have to take care of yourself. Good luck!

siniichulok

@wallsdonotfall Some of the wisest words I have ever heard about this were from my fellow bookseller at a big chain bookstore that treated its workers like crap. I had gotten an offer for a temp job that paid twice as much (we got paid minimum wage) but I had to start the next day or else I'd lose it, and I was tortured with guilt about leaving the terrible bookstore in the lurch. My fellow bookseller friend said, "your job will take care of your job. YOU have to take care of YOURSELF." Which was true.

panther

Headed to Toronto next week! Suggestions for things to do/see? Places to sit quietly and do work when necessary? I'm a vegan and don't really like bars, if that helps.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@panther They have a zoo (where I think the animals are pretty well taken care of?) and I've heard that this zoo has red pandas.

If there are any exhibits going on at TIFF Bell Lightbox, I highly recommend. I think those are the only recommendations I have, since I've spent a pitifully small amount of time in Toronto, and very little of it was relevant to your interests. (And some of it wasn't even relevant to mine!)

shalalas

@panther the distillery district is pretty cool! it's historic, and has some cute galleries and shops. there was also a nice fresh foods, etc. market (St. Lawrence i think?)that i stopped in on my way to the distillery district. the Kensington neighborhood is unique and lively. and although you aren't into the bar thing, i realllly enjoyed a tour of the Steam Whistle Brewery, which is housed in a converted historic train station type thing--it was informative, and there were a couple children along for the ride, too(but not for the tasting, haha).

Amphora

@panther Royal Ontario Museum and Art Gallery of Ontario (they're close by each other). If you like to hike, you can cross the entire city without leaving green space. It's pretty amazing.

karenb

@panther there are bundles of coffee shops and tea places that will be happy to provide to with good work spots, but depending on where you are, I like the reference library (on yonge just north of bloor) for that. There are branches all over the city with free wifi, too. since you're vegan, definitely go to Kensington market, the urban herbivore is there and pretty delicious.

http://www.blogto.com/toronto/the_best_vegetarian_restaurants_in_toronto/ is a good list, although veggie, not always vegan.

A good bet for event listings is Now Toronto or The Grid, free alt weeklies with good webpages. Torontoist and BlogTO are good general pages, too.

zamboni

@panther Other good vegan or vegan-friendly places to eat: Sadie's Diner (they also have an vegan ice cream/juice/sandwich bar in Kensington), Disgraceland (also a bar), Hogtown Vegan. I also really like the Toronto Reference Library for working but yeah, there's no shortage of coffee shops. I like The Tampered Press which is near Trinity-Bellwoods Park. Speaking of parks, go for a walk in High Park on a nice day.

panther

@all Amazing! You guys are the best. Thank you!

honey cowl

I had an interview today! Party party. Good week Pin.

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

CHICAGO

Cat show! October 12! We are going!

http://www.prairiestatecatclub.com/

bevrockin

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll Are you entering a cat?

thisisunclear

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll “People tend to put cats under one big label,” says a veteran TICA Judge from the West Coast. “And that is a mistake."

Related, it would be a mistake to miss the CAT SHOW.

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@bevrockin

Good question! I do not have a cat as of now, but perhaps I can obtain one.

Amphora

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll I want to come but I don't have a car!

dale

Washington DC & Chicago pinners!
I am coming to your cities in early October - DC is Oct 2-9, Chicago 9-13. If you would like to try to meet up, even just for tea, I'd be glad to see you! I think the best option might be if you email me, I am on the gmails at tindomiel, and then we can try to figure out if something will work. :-)
I'm excited! I've never traveled this far east in the US before, so this is all new!

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@dale
Do you like cats?? See above!

Seriously, totally come along!

dale

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll Ha ha, that's the one day I will have something definitely on the go with other friends!

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@dale
Oh no! Well, if you're downtown during the day earlier in the week, I'll buy you a coffee and we can go stare at the Bean for a bit and drink our coffees.

dale

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll Thursday I'm definitely bumming around with a friend (mostly the Art Institute and other art-related bits). Friday she may have to leave to go home, so that's a bit up in the air right now/more open? I could maybe meet you during your lunch hour, if you are working? Pop me an email and I'll keep you posted as to what is developing.

Amphora

@dale Come to my museum! We have art!
ETA In Chicago, in case you can't read my mind

dale

@Amphora which museum??

Amphora

@dale Email me at amphora.hairpin@gmail.com - I'm afraid there's already way too much personal info on the Hairpin from my comments...

coolallison

I'm going to share this, despite feeling really mortified. But y'all are my sisters (and understanding brothers) so I can let it out. But it's some lady TMI so brace yourselves. Today... I no joke bled through my skirt and onto my work chair. I feel like I'm in middle school. I'm on implanon, so despite just having my lady time finish a week ago, today was a fun surprise! I might offically be over this implanon business.

tealily

@coolallison Ughhhh, that sucks. Do you use a cup? I'm on Paragard, and it's been a lifesaver. You have to know when to put it in for it to work, however, so that may be moot. What a drag!

Hot Doom

@coolallison OOOH I'VE DONE THIS! Many empathic feelings. I'm also now on Paraguard though, and things are bloodier than ever. You're welcome.

P.S. to tealily, really about the cup? I was just thinking about how much I hate pads (as of getting paragard, wearing tampons causes me terrible cramps) but was worried there would be too much gore for a cup.

tealily

@Hot Doom YESSSSSS. As long as you change it regularly, it's not bad (unless this is something you are extra sensitive to). Instead of the usual twice a day, I change it more like I would be changing tampons most of the time. I'm a fan.

tealily

@Hot Doom I should add, though, if you are having problems with cramps with tampons, it may not be the best option. I'd try Softcup over a DivaCup, etc. and see how it goes.

bitchycrosstownexpress

@coolallison I am so sorry. I bled on my couch recently. Jolie recommended saline solution to take out blood in one of her Jezebel columns and it really does work, if you're still working on cleanup.

hurts

@coolallison Ah fuck! I once bled through my skirt in a biology class. One of the handful of times we had to wear the school's white lab coats.

Amphora

@bitchycrosstownexpress I bled on a friend's couch, accidentally. Someone I hadn't seen for years. I haven't seen her since, either (oh god did she notice?)

maxine of arc

@coolallison I bled on a relative's couch once. There's really no plausible deniability there, and it's someone I see frequently, so I had to be like "oh my god I'm sorry I just menstruated all over your couch, can I have a wet rag to clean it up with?" It was a significant factor in my decision to switch birth control pills.

meetapossum

@coolallison Is this where I can bitch about Gawker's Thatz Not Okay this week? A dude wrote in who had old period stains from 4 different girls on his bed and basically was too cheap to buy new sheets, which is gross for a bunch of reasons, but then Caity Weaver had to go and say this:

"How is it possible that four (4) separate girls have bled on your bed if you are not a murderer? I don’t think I’ve done it once, and I’ve had a whole ellipses of periods. A woman’s menstruation is not like an Eli Roth film, with blood gushing out of her, spraying everything in sight. You can usually tell when it’s occurring and it generally starts out pretty low-key. Whatever is happening in your bed, it deviates grossly from the norm."

Fuck you, Caity!

adorable-eggplant

@meetapossum FLAMES ON THE SIDE OF MY FACE! Even if it does happen to be mellow (not always the case), how am I supposed to tell if (for example) my period decides to kick off while I'm asleep. Riddle me that, Caity.

Briony Fields

@meetapossum Erm, what? My diva cup holds a limited amount of blood, and if things get gushy around 2am, how am I supposed to keep an eye on that AND sleep simultaneously? Eight hours of not changing a pad/tampon/diva cup is a lot, especially during the heavy days. I just hemorrhaged all over my sheets this past week, and I've been menstruating for 18 years, sheeeeesh!

maxine of arc

@Briony Fields Ugh yes, I sleep on a towel on my heaviest days because there's really NOTHING else I can do that will stop every single tiny leak for eight hours that isn't hideously uncomfortable.

loren smith

Austin pinner! A girl friend and I will be in your fair town in Nov for a lady weekend - what's the best? We mainly want shopping and drinking.

coolallison

@loren smith Are you beer drinkers, wine drinkers, or margarita drinkers? I haven't lived here long, and can't really speak to the shopping question, but homegirl loves to get her drink on so I can try to help?

loren smith

@coolallison In uni we invented something called a "rum bucket". We're just general drinkers. We're meeting in Austin after not having seen each other in like 5 years, so places to put our feet up and catch up would be great!

coolallison

@loren smith People are going to want to tell you "go to 6th street!" I say avoid 6th street. It's where the drunk college kids hang out.

There are quite a few "chill" bars on the east side (so if something is east 6th, it's okay.) The Liberty Bar has a food truck out back called East Side Kings that Paul Qui (winner of Top Chef) opened and is awessommmeee. There is another part of town with some bars made from old houses called Rainey Street... but I tried to go once and it was so crowded that I couldn't find a place to park and gave up. :/ People seem to love it though. There is a place up near my house called the Pour House that my husband is obsessed with (because it's laid back and the beers are cheap).

Also I found this: http://www.thrillist.com/drink/austin/the-best-bars-in-austin

I'm probably not helping as much as I was thinking I would. :/ While you're here though, you need to find some breakfast tacos (my fave are TacoDeli), and get some queso with guacamole in it (I had never seen it until moving to Austin but I'm in love). And maybe a Mexican Martini. (Guess what my favorite kind of food is.)

OH and I do want to go shopping on South Congress because it seems cool... that's just one of those things that I keep saying I'll get around to and... not so much yet.

adorable-eggplant

@loren smith Trudy's for Tex-mex (emphasis on the tex half of that: you will not be wanting for fake cheese) and Mexican Martinis (which are, from what I can tell, just powerful margaritas served in a martini glass) they will only give you two per person max, which is more than plenty (seriously, don't have four and drive/walk).

Uchiko happy hour is the best thing ever invented: $3 sake and less expensive versions of their killer, killer food.

I'm not a shopper, but I hear good things about South Congress?

the ghost of amy lee

@loren smith I enjoy E 6th street (NOT dirty 6th downtown). There really isn't much shopping in Austin. There are a few cute thrift stores on South Congress and South 1st, but besides that, it's just generic malls.

For cocktails, I'd suggest Rio Rita on E 6th, South Congress Cafe, or Halcyon (downtown on 4th). Margaritas are everywhere, but Guerros on South Congress is particularly good. For beer, I'd try Black Star Coop on North Lamar. Rainey St. is fun too, but like Coolallison said, parking is a bitch. It's a good place to land if you are using cabs or pedicabs.

Beaks

@loren smith I have not been to Austin in 3 years (but am moving back- yay!), so my info is outdated, but...
South Congress is/ was fun for recreational shopping. The store at the museum of modern art was also fun (more central downtownish)
I was going to recommend Hoover's for good ole southern cooking but it looks like they've moved from their old location. Might still be worth a shot, though, if you like all your vegetables to contain bacon. Austin Java is/ was good for breakfast (migas!), and they have a few locations. For drinks, the Dog and Duck pub was always good for beer (often local) and fried things- if it's still nice enough to sit outside, I'd hit them up. Near UT but somehow not full of college students.

Also, "east side" is east of I-35

loren smith

@coolallison Thank you!

loren smith

@adorable-eggplant Happy Hour! The prohibition era laws where I live prevent that so it is such a novelty!

camanda

We were completely, mind-bogglingly swamped at work this week, and got absolutely nothing done. It was horrible. I've never had such a depressing, discouraging week at my job. And it's only September! I stayed at work an extra hour and a half tonight trying to wrap something up and I know I didn't finish. One of those weeks -- every task we had was like that, just not done despite our best efforts.

So over Labor Day weekend, we had some nasty thunderstorms, and my house totally got hit by lightning. Not awesome! We had power, but it blew out the Internet/phone/cable, and it took out the electric fence. Like, direct hit, blew the plugs for the fence right out of their sockets and burned the surge protector. We were really, really lucky. Everything's up and running again now, though, which is good, though I have no way to play my Wii right now (TV's component input is not working, and my cable signal is shit so I can't use my RF modulator) and that's upsetting. Sigh.

One good thing: pre-ordered the new limited Zelda edition Wii U last weekend! The price drop coupled with the inclusion of Wind Waker HD finally got me to cave in and buy one. It comes out next Friday and the anticipation's killing me. Toys! I am a grown-up.

Happy weekend, all!

celeec4@twitter

@camanda Work sounds like a horror, do you at least have the weekend off?

Also, omg, pictures of shiny new limited Zelda WiiU? I have no time for straight up console gaming anymore. At least handhelds, I can take around with me and sneak time over lunch at work?

Being grown-up sucks.

camanda

@celeec4@twitter I have tomorrow off. Sunday I have a couple of projects to do in th emorning and then I'm helping to put the Christmas shop up. /sobs By this time last year it had already been up for a week, so, uhm, progress?

Here's a promo shot of the thing. It's really basic but I'm glad they did that instead of, like, a gold GamePad. Me, console gaming is my jam, I make the time for it. I don't bring my 3DS to work because I'm too afraid of it getting stolen but I still play it plenty! Especially now that I can't play my Wii. /grumbles

celeec4@twitter

@camanda Oof. Rough.

As much as I love console gaming, something in my life had to give. X_X

Stupid graduate school. Ahahaha....

tealily

It's my boyfriend's birthday, but I'm mad at him. He's been down in the dumps lately and taking it out on me, which isn't fair at all, but rather than have it degenerate into a full-blown fight, I've been holding my tongue and taking it. I don't feel like this is a good strategy, but I don't know what else to do. Maybe all the tension and resentment will flit away this weekend, though, amid celebration. One can hope.

Hot Doom

@tealily Aw, I'm sorry that's happening. See how things go this weekend, but it might be time to muster some courage and say something like "Boyfriend, I know you are down in the dumps, and I want to be here for you, but sometimes it feels like you take it out on me unfairly." Or something like that. I was on the flip side of this last year when I was going through depression and stressful times and was taking things out on my husband because I had no one else, but he finally told me it was taking a toll on him. I found it helpful that he said something to keep me mindful of how my depression was affecting him, so maybe your bf would too? Either way, it's not healthy for you, as I'm sure you're aware. Good luck, girl!

frigwiggin

Oh yeah, I think I got in touch with everybody from last week who signed up for the CD swap! You should all have partners, so get to swappin'!

[sic]

@frigwiggin I don't think I got your reply: could you resend it? Thank you!

frigwiggin

@[sic] Oh, what do you know, I missed you! Sorry about that. I'd better go through my inbox again and see if I missed anybody else! Thanks for letting me know.

frigwiggin

@frigwiggin (P.S. If anybody else is interested in doing the mix CD swap, email me at figwiggin [at] gmail! Exactly one person ought to do the trick!)

Briony Fields

Can we talk about monogamy? How do you deal? I'm pretty sure any form of open relationship wouldn't work for me, but sometimes the thought of having to see my boyfriend every day and continue to work (barf) on the relationship bums me out. I feel guilty, because he's a gem of a boyfriend and 99% of the time I'm thrilled that he's mine, we love each other a lot. But...sometimes I just want to run away and make out with ALLLLLL the cute boys!

tealily

@Briony Fields If you were non-monogamous, you would still have to work on the relationship though. Unless what you truly want is a series of short relationships, rather than one ongoing one. Which is fine too!

Hot Doom

@Briony Fields Hmm, so I'm married and still think about this sometimes. I think it's ok and normal to be attracted to other people while you're attached, but if it really, actually starts to bug you, maybe reassess how you feel about your bf, as in, he is a gem, but is he the gem you want to make out with at the end of the day? It seems like he is, so there's probably not a problem. Fantasies are fun. I have them (a lot..safe distant ones, that is), you have them, he most likely does too.

Briony Fields

@tealily I want all the things, without the work. Is that so much to ask?

Briony Fields

@Hot Doom We have actually talked about this, and how it's normal to have a wandering eye, etc. I think it's all about how much discomfort you're willing to put up with. Yes, I want to smooch other people now and then, but even then I'm never actually tempted to do it. I still recognize that he is what I want long term, and that I'd be throwing away something very precious to me. I also don't feel this way very often. But when I do....BLARGH.

celeec4@twitter

Hey, just wanted to say thanks to the 'Pinner's in last week's FOT for advice and perspective on dealing with well-meaning but slightly overwhelming family. Sure, we snapped at one another a bit this past visit, but oh man, it went more smoothly than others have gone in the past.

This doesn't mean they aren't still attempting to set me up with introductions to men they think are acceptable. But at least they're being more polite about it?

In other randomness, is anyone else watching Free! Iwatobi Swim Club? It is absolutely silly and I love it.

Oh and, apparently airports are great places to get StreetPasses for 3DS, if anyone else is wondering where the hell to meet people and snoop/see what games other people are playing.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

Can we talk about two major events in pop culture this week?

1- Reflektor

2- Julianne Moore cast as Coin in the last two Hunger Games movies, which had apparently been rumoured but I never saw it coming.

DISCUSS

SmartCookie

@Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that) I didn't see Julianne Moore as Coin coming either. I don't think I like it... (But then I never like who they cast for any movies from books.)

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@SmartCookie I think I like it? If only because I'm interested to see what Julianne Moore will do with a character that has zero vulnerability. She isn't who I pictured in the role at all, but I think she's so talented as an actor that this is a pretty big "get" for a franchise that already has a really great cast.

And for some reason I keep thinking about her hair. Coin is supposed to have grey hair, I think, but I'd love to see her keep her red hair for the role.

SmartCookie

@Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that) You're right, it's totally the hair that's throwing me. I love JM as an actress and I'm sure she'll do a great job but it will be interesting to see what they decide to do with her hair.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@SmartCookie Did you have anyone in particular that you would have cast, given the chance?

Also, who do you think they'll cast as Paylor? If I remember correctly, in the books Coin is supposed to be around 50 or in her early fifties, which Julianne Moore is, but she looks younger. (Also, who'll they cast as Paylor?)

SmartCookie

@Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that) If I could magically age Sandra Oh, that's who I would have cast. I don't have any image at all of Paylor in my head... Do you have a dream Paylor?

JanieS

@SmartCookie omg I thought I was a proper Hunger Games superfan but I don't even remember who Paylor isssss ...

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@JanieS To avoid spoilers: http://thehungergames.wikia.com/wiki/Commander_Paylor

I had written a whole thing, but then I accidentally navigated away from this page, so I'll just write a list:
For Paylor: Either Rose Byrne or we pretend that Jennifer Garner is a couple years younger than she is.

For Coin: Helen Mirren, Olivia Williams, Lena Headey, or (most of all!) Alfre Woodard.

yeah-elle

I have a date tonight and even though it's super super low-pressure (he's just a cute dude who gave me his number, I have a teenage-level-brain-eating crush on someone else) I am still so nervous I could vomit. Whyyyyyy

Gulfie

@yeah-elle Because dates are weirdly, distressing, horrifyingly nerve-wracking. I find the worst is over by the time I'm physically in their presence though! Good luck, and good on you for going despite the vomit-feels. That shit is not easy.

yeah-elle

@Gulf of Finland Arrghhh thanks for the luck! Might probably sorta need it, oof.

mystique

So what do you think of the Hairpin's new deal? The thing is, I appreciate it, I understand, I know change is good, but ugh, I miss some parts of the old Hairpin.

I know the political stuff is really really important. But I miss the weirdness! Especially the focus on personal weirdness and essays. And there are excellent essays like that (and not-so-excellent ones...which the comments: love it!), but the focus is so starkly political as to wear me out. I think it's important to have that political consciousness, but the reason I loved the Hairpin was that it was one of the few sites "for women" that wasn't about politics or beauty or love, but about women's stories about their humanity.

Change is inevitable, of course, but I wanted to say how much I miss the old 'pin, and checking it everyday.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@mystique I kind of don't mind the political pieces, just because I like the tone of them, which I find is, um, on-brand with the Hairpin brand?

I find that the weirdness we have now isn't always the same weirdness we used to have, save for the pie charts.

RNL
RNL

@mystique I'm with you, generally! The tone has changed, and it's pretty obvious that lots of people have left.

I feel like it's missing the funny, glib sweetness. Lots of re-posting political stuff, and the original content is just not hitting the right notes. I don't know! It's just not working well. It makes me sad.

coolallison

@mystique My favorites were always the... what were they all called? Was it the "best time I..." stories? Basically where someone would write about something they had been through. There was one about a colposcopy, and after reading it and all the comments I felt so much better and like I could actually talk about these things.

mystique

@Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that) Hmm I think the political pieces are on brand but they are so differently presented. Doing a roundup of stories about the subjugation of women in developing countries with the headline "Three Stories of Women Who Don't Have It All" is so damn rough -- it's so painfully trivializing. I would rather an essay about that, where we go into these topics and dissect them like the dead frogs they are.

paper bag princess

@mystique It's definitely odd to realize how much of a website like this is actually down to the editor -- maybe Edith is the 'Pin and the 'Pin is Edith. But it's also the commenters -- I finally found a full-time job a few months ago and I haven't been able to comment much, not like I ever did. But I just looked at the front page and only 6 of the 14 posts have double-digit numbers of comments, which seems sad. (Although also, no email notifications is a real drag and probably some part of it.)

I'm not ready to give up yet because there are still a lot of things I like....change is just hard! @mystique, I agree that I'd rather read personal essays about newsy topics rather than link roundups, but I recognize that it's tough to find all those writers and edit all those essays. I dunno, things are definitely changing around here but it makes me sad that people are being so negative. Maybe we should all write some personal essays and send them in.

anachronistique

@mystique For me, part of it is the weirdness and part of it is being super busy (start of the academic year and I work at a university) and part of it, honestly, is that I forget to come back to keep up with conversations when I don't get comment notifications. And the site keeps logging me out a lot as well, which is just frustrating.

drydenlane

@mystique I'm with you, the new Hairpin kind of bums me out. There are a lot fewer articles that I enjoy reading or even feel like clicking over to read from my feed reader. It also feels like sort of a pretty girl club I feel way separate from. That might not be appropriate to say, but I'll go with it.

I think it's pretty telling that Deadspin now links over to Hairpin posts on the reg. (Yes, I read both, even though Deadspin is kind of fucked. I like sports!) It makes sense they'd continue to follow (what's now) Emma's site, but both site should, in theory, have a fairly separate schtick.

Angelena@twitter

@mystique i agree... i used to really like that the hairpin was a 'little bit of everything' and i checked it everyday... i still usually do just because i work nights (lol) but i find myself never really clicking on much these days and i'm in somewhat of a mourning state. ask a lady...ask a clean person..funny lists/quirky essays with feelings! aaah i need the feels.

sophia_h

@mystique the site previously felt like most girls/women I know -- considering ourselves feminist and progressive for sure, but having lots of girly guilty pleasures which we then feel guilty about labeling "guilty pleasures" because we like what we like, right?? I think that paradox of modern feminism/womanhood has gone from the site's mission and identity and that's why we feel more like it's full of articles we "should" like than ones we do.

skeedaddle

@sophia_h It's like Jezebelgate 2008 all over again.

Hot Doom

@mystique Glad you put this up, because I feel like it's sort of coming to a head this week. I am also in a bit of a mourning state. There are fewer articles I'm interested in reading and just don't bother clicking on them anymore, whereas in the past, I would think "ok, not into this topic, but it's the Pin, I will give it the benefit of the doubt" and would still wind up liking things. Not so much anymore. Seeing holdovers, like Ann Friedman's pie charts perks me up, but really, I'm finding more content (and commenters) elsewhere *coughcoughtoastcough* that I identify with (in the same way I used to with the hairpin). Reading the Hairpin used to give me a warm fuzzy feeling, both in content, and with commenters, because it was like finding a kindred spirit to discuss allll sorts of things with, which felt so unusual. Now it sort of feels like, I dunno, that friend went to camp and came back...different. More like all the other girls, and sort of (SORT OF??) sometimes acting like the girl who just prefers to hang out with guys and drink whiskey. Which is to say, things change, editors and writers change, but this all seemed to happen pretty quickly (and I think lack of comment notifications also contributes to loss of community), so it just seems sad. According to the podcast, I know Edith said go forth and do whatever with the hairpin once she left, and the change in tone is so slight, but it's clearly enough to alienate the group of people who were devotees of the site.

mystique

@coolallison There's so many things I miss! Katie Heaney, Carolita, what's in your purse, weird stories about clocks and Canadian politics conflated with Tinker Tailer Soldier Spy...at least we have the archives!

mystique

@Hot Doom YES. The Toast. I think the 'Pin'll be my site to check weekly, and the Toast will be my new home.

Pound of Salt

@mystique I really miss Friday Bargain Bin and League of Ordinary Ladies

Scandyhoovian

@mystique That's what's happened to me -- I'm at the Toast every damn day reading every little thing that they post regardless of whether or not I think I'll find it interesting (and I am often pleasantly surprised). This is behavior I used to do here at the 'Pin, but since the change a lot of the things I loved about this site have stopped or have gone to other places, and I have followed them to their new locations. Jolie at Jez/Deadspin, everyone at the Toast...

I used to be here at the 'Pin all day every day, and now I find myself just skimming over once or twice a week in a "what's going on at the 'Pin lately?" mood strikes me. And actually clicking into individual posts or following links out of the 'Pin is a far less frequent occurrence than it used to be. I'm not a fan of the changes.

polka dots vs stripes

Why is UPS so terrible? Why why why. I don't order much online, but everything I've bought this past month has either been terribly late, not even delivered, or arrived with the box completely opened. I guess I should be happy the delivery guy didn't want a women's dress?

Oy vey.

anachronistique

@polka dots vs stripes I was just ranting on Twitter about how UPS has decided that my vacuum, alone out of all the packages, cannot be left in my building's entryway. Which is hidden from the street and has never had a problem with theft. It didn't even require a signature, they just didn't feel like leaving it. And this facility is apparently closed weekends (???????) so my options are stay home Monday to get it, or have them keep it and haul a giant upright vacuum home on the bus. I fucking cannot.

katiemcgillicuddy

OH SPORTS, YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD

The Nationals are coming up Milhouse, and I am afraid to believe. They still have a ways to go but, eeeeeeeeeeee.

Hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey is coming to town. I just heard John Carlson do an incredibly boring interview with Chris Cooley (who is on local radio now, yay, he's great at it, too, I love that he could so still be playing in the league but was like, eh, I am going to make pottery and hang out at the bar and be on the radio instead)and it was still SO EXCITING BECAUSE HOCKEY, EVERYBODY.

People are cheating in NASCAR, or something, you'd have to ask my brother, I'm not great with the NASCAR.

Boxing? Anyone? Mayweather v. Alvarez?

Fucking Alex Rodriguez. This fuckin' guy! He's been crushing it. Please, AL East, don't let the Yankees in (come on Orioles!)

Men's National Soccer Team, REPRESENT.

Guys, what's tricks with your teams??

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@katiemcgillicuddy I'M GOING TO A PRESEASON NHL GAME ON SUNDAY

SUNDAY!!!!

Also, the New York Jets, who I said I was on a break from, won on Sunday so like now I don't know what to think. (They lost yesterday, and the Pats-Jets matchup is actually one of my favourites to watch, but I was at a bachelorette party so I couldn't watch it, and also I forgot.)

katiemcgillicuddy

@Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that) Dude, it was some ugly motherfucking football, you missed nothing. Woo-hoo about the preseason game!

Onymous

@katiemcgillicuddy Storm are locked into the play offs but their almost certainly playing the Lynx in the first round so we aren't getting past that.

Sounders aren't locked in but they've spent the last two months climbing the table so they're pretty safe.

Unfortunately I'm not going to get to watch the 'Hawks/Niners game (boo work at 3:30 boo) but we made them look like jokes last year and it is a home game so I'm hopeful.

bitchycrosstownexpress

@katiemcgillicuddy It was ugly, but somehow not as soul crushingly ugly as Jets losses usually are? I don't know, maybe having the Pats also look bad helped.

The Cardinals can not shake the Pirates, but the team as a whole has been playing better so I feel less like we're doomed to immediate elimination if we wind up with a Wild Card. Though having a weekend series against the Mariners in September is all kinds of bizarre.

camanda

@katiemcgillicuddy Between USMNT's victory and Argentina trouncing Paraguay 5-2, it's been a good week for fútbol. In my view, at least.

Dodgers: Juan Uribe hit three home runs the other night. I...I don't...I just can't...there aren't words.

katiemcgillicuddy

@Onymous Man, I am so excited for Seahawks v. Niners, it's gonna be a battle. I love that the coaching rivalry goes back to college.

Lurkasaurus

@katiemcgillicuddy Obviously all my "I'm so over the Chiefs, I can't be hurt by them anymore" posturing was total BS and I am just as much of a sucker as ever...because 1 good win (against the woeful Jaguars no less) and I'm going crazy. I will be sad and disappointed if we do not beat the Cowboys on Sunday. Hope is a helluva drug.

Stanford has probably its easiest game/most guaranteed win of the season this week. It is nice to not be nervous. It is less nice to have to wake up for a 9 am PST game on a Saturday, but oh, the sacrifices I make for football ;)

katiemcgillicuddy

@Lurkasaurus Man, I can't believe the Cheifs are the favorites over the Cowboys, I love it (although, fuck, hopefully that doesn't help the Cowboys)

katiemcgillicuddy

@bitchycrosstownexpress Goddamn Pirates, as a Nats fan, I wan't them to win their division (I know, I'm sorry) so they are removed from the wildcard race and we have a better shot, but I am afraid to root for them because, ugh, please don't take the wildcard away from us :/

sophia_h

@katiemcgillicuddy the Dodgers are totally going to clinch this weekend in front of the Giants, probably with Brian Wilson pitching. Last season was written by a fairy godmother, and it seems like this one got handed to Maleficent. Sigh.

redheaded&crazy

@katiemcgillicuddy SO EXCITED FOR HOCKEEYYYYYYY!!! I'm gonna be living in BC and therefore have to come to some sort of terms with the Canucks (who I know nothing about), as well as with probably being the perpetual butt of jokes (which I know lots about but do not enjoy HAHA hmmm).

I have decided that if Luongo can compel me this season I can get on board. But anyway I'm really really really really really pumped for hockey!

Bittersweet

@katiemcgillicuddy et al: The Chiefs beat the Cowboys! A lot of close games today. But not the DC team, who got their asses handed to them by the Packers. Sigh. And yes, holy crap, that Thurs night Pats-Jets game was MF ugly.

Took my daughter to her first game at Fenway yesterday. We had a blast! Great seats behind the visitors dugout, ate junk food all afternoon, and the Red Sox beat the Yankees 5-1. Can't beat that with a stick.

mrsnurse

My apologies for all the pregnancy related posts I do, I'm kind of useless otherwise. As of today, I'm 12 weeks pregnant and am so excited to be leaving the first trimester behind. It's been a long couple of months. I'm anticipating spending the weekend trying to distract myself from next week's happenings: Monday I have an appointment, and they didn't hear the heartbeat last time at 9 weeks (via Doppler, they did on the ultrasound), but promised me I would at 12 weeks. I've had terrible nightmares this week that there won't be one. Later in the week, I need to come out of the closet about this at work. I'm a school nurse and even though I've put on zero pounds so far, I look huge (to me). Up a bra size or two, and I swear my weight has been rearranged to all be right in my belly. Anyway, between my zillion appointments and feeling crappy (a daily headache is the new symptom), as well as the whole body change thing, I'd rather say it than let others wonder about it. I think it will be a relief to have it not be a secret anymore, but I'm also dreading it because I know I am going to be bombarded with experienced mother wisdom such as, "Sleep now because you never will again!" and questions about whether it was planned. Admittedly, I haven't known the baby daddy forever, but I also knew on our first date that I wanted his kids...after saying for 5 years previously that I'd never have kids. We have already received many questions about this, speculation that we're only getting married because of the "accident," and I'm at my wit's end with such comments. I just can't think of a response other than trying not to punch those people in the face.

Basically I continue to just be totally overwhelmed by pregnancy, which has been a bit rough on my relationship with Baby Daddy. I hope this gets better.

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

@mrsnurse I hope so, too! I have no motherly wisdom to impart, so you won't get any of that from me. It sounds like you're nervous about the whole thing (which is normal) and experiencing some pretty crappy first-trimester stuff (which happens to other fabulous pregnant ladies as well.)
If I can give you some advice? From my perspective, here's how you should be prioritizing things:
1- Your and the baby's health (physical and emotional)
2- Baby Daddy
3- Telling people that you're very happy to be expecting a child with Baby Daddy
4- Now that people know you're pregnant, figure out ways to use this to your advantage, like, I don't know, free snacks or people holding doors for you and stuff

and I'm wishing you all the best for Monday's appointment!

mrsnurse

@Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that) Oh, totally going to be working on #4!! Ever since I told my dad (at 8 weeks), he's been watching out for me like no other. It's been awesome, I wish everyone could be so positive about it. (Unlike my mom's reaction, which was, "I thought that's why you were engaged." Uhh...we were engaged before we knew. For two days, but still.)

Thank you for the kind words, I'm super into lists and love your priority list. :)

TheBelleWitch

@mrsnurse Ooooh "Sleep now because you never will again!" was my least-favorite comment during pregnancy. It just made me scared to have the baby! And it's not like you can store up sleep for later, so it's stupid anyway. ALSO you will sleep again. Yes, you're going to be a walking zombie on a 24-hour clock for awhile. It will pass, and you will look back and be amazed that you did it and shocked that the baby is already {x} weeks old and sleeping longer stretches.

Sorry you have to deal with nosy personal questions. My Advice Column hero Carolyn Hax always suggests a straightforward, "Wow." or "That's an awfully personal question." I wish I ever had the presence of mind to try one of those, because those people need to be SHAMED hard.

milominderbender

Today in tales of my most-not-favorite coworker: she volunteered to plan our group retreat. She chose a large hotel in an uninteresting city. She then sent a survey around to all participants listing every possible activity (including "group olympics" and "zumba") for them to select for some of the relaxation and team-building time. Now that everyone's responded and the agenda is drafted, she revealed that the activities are scheduled at the hotel and we would have to plan our agenda around them. So she circulated the activity calendar for us to rethink the agenda. Are you annoyed yet? What about when I tell you that most of the activities she offered aren't even available on the days that we will be there?

I die.

Briony Fields

@milominderbender Is this the same coworker who did a conference call in her pajamas last week? If so, I think I'm becoming a fan.

milominderbender

@Briony Fields YES!

I really think I would find it pretty entertaining if it didn't all seem to ultimately equal more work for me.

loren smith

@milominderbender You don't work at a Utah-based communications company do you? This sounds - structurally - like the company my husband works for.

milominderbender

@loren smith No, but if they're hiring, I have someone I would recommend!

Blue skies

@milominderbender Oh my lord, I know what you mean. Today my least favorite coworker, who is a director, left the office early for the THIRD week without dismissing her team, who are mainly temps who cannot lock up our offices for admin type reasons & so cannot be last in the building. But the FTEs had summer hours and used to leave at 1 pm (which usually meant 2 or 2:30 for me), so when she left with no plans for locking up it was an issue. The first two times I and the other junior staff person were stuck calling her to see if we could dismiss them because we also needed to leave. I had to stay later than I wanted to once because of this. And it's a bit odd to have another team's admin (me) dismiss your own employees. My boss wasn't pleased.

But today I was vindicated because the executive assistant was the one who noticed she just bailed early and didn't dismiss her team, so a) I didn't have to stay again because she handled it and b) the assistant will bring up to her boss, the president. Summer hours are over, but the president let us all leave at 4 because we worked an event last night, late. And yes, the temps worked it too. This woman is just so inconsiderate! She never even thinks of her own employees! Argh.

Amphora

Has anyone learned to ride a bike as an adult? Has anyone tried to learn how to ride a bike when you also have panic disorder and hyperventilate when trying to get both feet on the pedals at the same time?

up cubed

@Amphora I learned as a kid with training wheels. I'm not sure if that is an option for adult bikes?
I'm always nervous getting started though. My 2 best tips are to get the things that cover your toes on the pedals (like cages)- I assume they are designed to be tightish, but I keep them be loose. I also adjust the seat SUPER low, so I can put both feet on the ground while on the seat.

Amphora

@upupandaway My city has instituted a bike rental program, so I'm using a big clunky bike with a relatively high seat and no options to modify the pedals. That's part of what's so scary, definitely (the other part is SPEED EEK)

SarahP

@Amphora I learned just a few years ago! I did ride on the roads a bit, but the time I felt the most confident was when my husband took me to a big empty parking lot--road-like conditions with few of the dangers. Are there any parking lots you know of that might be empty (or at least have a large section empty)? Maybe an office area on a Sunday afternoon when not many people are working?

up cubed

@Amphora I imagine there must be some type of seat adjustment mechanism, unless they think people will remove and steal the seat? Carry a wrench??

harebell

@Amphora
YES! I learned as an adult, and what really really helped was taking a class from a professional at teaching adults how to ride bikes. They exist in a lot of major cities -- New York, & Boston I know for sure, but probably others. It was so great to have someone non-judgmental who knew it is a skill you learn, not an in-born thing (because most people you encounter have forgotten their whole learning process since it happened in childhood, arrg).

The main thing that she did, other than being non-judgmental, was have me glide around on the bike in a parking lot without touching the pedals AT ALL to get my sense of balance working, and to get me used to the speed and sensations of the bike. You just have to find a space like a parking lot with a very gentle downward slope to glide on, and practice. Once I felt comfortably balanced, it was much easier to put my feet on the pedals and pedal without losing balance, get started from a stop, etc.

The other thing that really really helped was riding an upright bike, not a forward-leaner one; one of those nice sturdy Amsterdam granny bikes that you can't go fast on but you also will always feel pretty steady on. And then zoom, zoom, enjoy!

apples and oranges

@Amphora The REI near me has adult learn-to-bike classes! And the staff in that store are all very nice and not in any way judge-y outdoors people who will scoff at you for not knowing how to bike or what a crampon (full disclosure I first tried to spell this "crompin") is or whatever. So if there's an REI near you, maybe check it out? Or another store like that!

Good luck!!! you can do it!

Pompis

@Amphora

The best way to get a comfortable feel for biking -- a tandem!! I was fairly old when I learned how to ride (and a smidge anxious) but my dad and I rented a bicycle built for two, which really let me feel what it's like to ride. Seriously, I can't recommend it highly enough. Now I commute by bike every day! Plus, tandem bikes are all-around hilarious.

paper bag princess

My office is freezing all the time, and my poor feeties turn into icicles. Anyone have any suggestions of good slippers that I can keep at the office? Something that looks a lot like shoes -- I dunno if "professional slippers" is even a thing, but I just need something that's not bunny slippers or Ugg boots.

milominderbender

@paper bag princess Some companies make shearling loafer type things but I kept a pair of ordinary black house slippers for this purpose. They were definitely a little fuzzy but no one seemed to notice because they were black.

coolallison

@paper bag princess Maybe some kind of moccasin? That, like milominderbender said, has some kind of shearling inside? I'm about to get some for myself for this very reason.

SmartCookie

@paper bag princess Mine is always freezing, too. I love love love my tiny space heater.

Onymous

@paper bag princess Would you consider work socks instead? Just buy some nice thick wool socks and switch into them at work.

polka dots vs stripes

@paper bag princess LL Bean makes fabuuuulous lined moccasin slipper type things, some of which look very shoe-like: http://www.llbean.com/llb/shop/513347?page=20-off-end-of-season-gear-sale&nav=pA1b-hp#/llb/shop/503005?nav=ln-609&page=slippers

paper bag princess

@Onymous That's a good idea, but I worry that I'd take them home to wash them and forget to bring them back? I don't know why the idea of not washing the slippers seems better, though. That's an odd question. Maybe I'll try the socks before I commit to a pair of slippers!

@polka dots vs stripes ooh those look nice! I hadn't thought of LL Bean!

Jinxie

@paper bag princess For what it's worth I LOVE my LL Bean slippers. I got the them for Xmas one year and they still rank as one of the best presents I've ever received.

skeedaddle

@SmartCookie Could not live without mine. (It's not allowed. I don't care. They can fire me before I'd give up my little friend.)

Away Laughing

@skeedaddle Ugg makes tennis-shoe-looking-things that have shearling on the inside? I've seen people use them after swimming when it's cold. They're not very formal, but at least they're not obviously Uggs.

milominderbender

@skeedaddle Once, my next-door office friend and I both had our little (illegal) heaters running and we blew a fuse. All the electricity on half the floor went out. Everyone's computers shut down. Luckily the grumpy partner (and retired judge) was out for the day or she really might have fired us. Instead, the other partner walked out of his office and announced "time for coffee!" and took us out while facilities fixed everything.

Gulfie

Hey MSW Pinners! I have to interview some MSWs about their work for a paper and seeing as the only MSWs I know in real life are my professors, I thought maybe a few of you might be willing to help me. It shouldn't take long and I can do the interview over phone or email, whichever way you feel comfortable, but we would have to drop anonymity for it, and I know that's asking quite a bit. But I would really love the help! Thanks Pin.

SarahP

I haven't been able to be on the Hairpin as much because my new job is keeping me crazy busy. I love it, but I miss the 'pin.

My new coworkers are all so wonderful and fun and kind, I have giant friendcrushes on them all. I had a dream last night that we were all already friends and went out for dinner, just hanging out talking, and it was one of the best dreams I have had in a loooong time. I was a little sad to wake up and realize we still have to make the jump from colleague to friend yet.

BattyRabbit

@SarahP That is the cutest dream!!!! And soon I bet it will become reality.

Mae
Mae

@SarahP I want to work at your office!

SarahP

@BattyRabbit and @Mae One of them just friended me on facebook! IT HAS BEGUN!

Clara Morena

Teehee, I got a volunteer opportunity at a health clinic and I turned in my application for graduation. :D

sophia_h

Practical motherhood complaint: California, get your shit together. I am six weeks post partum and still haven't gotten my family leave befits, which is holding up my application for state insurance, so my son is uninsured and I have no money coming in. Fix your budgets and hire more staff!

Emotional motherhood complaint, c&p from the Momterview today because I am typing with one finger (sleeping baby on me): How do you get to the point of being ok to leave your baby? I thought I'd look forward to returning to work and letting my husband stay on unemployment as care provider, but I can barely stand to move my six week old to the swing when he falls asleep on me, and I haven't even tried pumping to bottle feed yet. Is it just a function of time? It's not even like this is so much fun, I am tired of typing one handed emails and comments (ahem) but anything else feels wrong.

TheBelleWitch

@sophia_h I missed that Momterview thread! I will have to go check if you got any good advice, because I'm going through the same thing. I underestimated how physically attached I'd feel to my daughter. I can really identify with what you're describing, wanting to have your hands free but not wanting to put them down.

Three months out is getting easier than six weeks, though. I do think time helps, plus as they get older, they seem stronger/more independent and it's easier to stomach. We've gotten our daughter a sitter, and it was a little wrenching to hand her over that first time, but it has gotten easier. I'm not back at work full time for another two weeks, though, so look for me freaking out on the first open thread in October. :/

siniichulok

@sophia_h Typing one-handed with sleeping baby too! I only just started feeling like I'm creeping back to normal recently, and it's been eleven weeks. I'm always anxious to get a breather outside, but once I'm there I miss his little face. Incidentally, even in Canada, the Land of the Family-Friendly, my husband took two months of leave (before he extended it for six more--I'm unemployed so he was the one who took it), and it took them the entire first two months for the money to get to us, even though he handed in the paperwork well in advance, so we had no positive cash flow during that time. Bureaucracies!

Blue skies

For those of you who replied to me a few weeks ago re: crush on my friend's boyfriend's roommate:
1. nonononono it is not my friend's boyfriend (think Darth Vader no... google if necessary)
2. he is single. I would NEVER go there if not and we wouldn't have this issue.

So I haven't really gotten up the courage to text him for drinks. I did once before and it turned out that our mutual friends, the couple, were "being lame" so he wanted to reschedule, which tells me he didn't pick up on the fact that I wanted to hang out with him just him. I guess I didn't make it explicit, but he was the one to say "I'm getting back into town in early evening, will you be around?" so I kind of got too excited about that I guess. I didn't follow through to suggest just us two meet up because we live in different neighborhoods and it was already pretty late by then in my city where public transport shuts down early. I think I am not getting the good vibes from him which is too bad, but I'm okay with it.

Also our mutual friends used to basically live at his apartment, but they moved in together as a couple so he has a different roommate now. So maybe I'll see him less anyway... but this moved happened over Sept 1 and that sort of coincided with a ramp up in the texting/general interest in hanging out.

Blue skies

Also: unrelated awesome thing of September: I moved into a great apartment with two great roommates! Two weeks in and it's going really well!

Myrtle

@Beaker I unfriended and blocked a man who was super-manipulative and not of the calibre of person I want in my life. I also blocked the person he lives with, in case he tries to use that person's computer to contact me. I did it once before but that was before I learned that he's a sociopath and got manipulated into being linked again... So grateful to websites where people posted stories about their sociopath experiences, so I could read stories just like mine. I feel FANTASTIC!!!!!! I have my happy life back!!

Post a Comment

You must be logged-in to post a comment.

Login To Your Account