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Thursday, July 18, 2013

109

Other Rolling Stone Covers

You have seen the many varied responses to the image of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev on the cover of Rolling Stone. I read Janet Reitman's (long and well-reported) "Jahar's World" story for the magazine last night and found it to be a soft, soft softball, but that's just me, and anyway the debate around this controversy felt like a sinkhole as soon as it started, didn't it? We live in a world of mistakes and misguidance and tragedy and young people who don't know what the fuck they're doing and the good eggs being ignored while the idiots get all the attention. Here are some other Rolling Stone covers that bring that fact in, although, of course, in a much different way.

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Anne Helen Petersen

"Britney is There for Contrast Only, Guys"

SmartCookie

@Anne Helen Petersen Phew! I missed the alt text and was temporarily sad and confused.

Tragically Ludicrous

@Anne Helen Petersen thank you for letting me know that there is alt-text!

Judith Slutler

@Anne Helen Petersen I'm just glad this was reiterated in the tags.

stalkingcat

@Anne Helen Petersen
But do you remember how absolutely scandalous that Britney cover was when it came out? She was under 18 at the time, and this was before she was writhing on stage with a snake.

It's blase now, but back then it was OMG CHILD PORN!

Brunhilde

@stalkingcat There was also a picture of her with ruffle-butt underwear inside that people were very OMG CHILD PORN about inside. (I was a subscriber in college and got this issue, it pissed me off at the time because why the hell is Britney on the cover of my rock 'n roll magazine? That music is for children please make it stop!)

kkmmcc

I live in Boston and have for eight years -- I went to college here and have basically become an adult in this city. I was absolutely devastated and heartbroken and terrified this April. But I cannot really muster up anger at this cover. I think the article is something to be far more angry at -- how many times do I have to read how "chill" and "cool" this kid was? soft soft softball is calling it lightly, in my opinion.

j-i-a

@kkmmcc Yeah. Full admission that "soft soft softball" is itself a softball. I'm with you; the article is much worse than the cover; just am still processing, and don't think I'm the right person to say why anyway.

Statham

@kkmmcc I agree that the article is a rough read, and I'm glad the Mayor spoke up and said something.

The cover bothers me immensely though, because a lot of younger girls are already up in arms over how he's attractive, and then they go and make a cover that looks like it belongs on Tiger Beat. Some of the comments I've read regarding it have made my stomach twist because they all talk about how he's too cute to be charged with his crimes etc.

It bothers me that younger girls don't realize that mass-murdering people should make someone incredibly unattractive and worthy of punishment.

Judith Slutler

@Statham eh. That's just putting a girlish touch on your run-of-the-mill conspiracy theorism. Bet you every one of those people also is a Truther, etc.

kkmmcc

@Statham It bothers everyone because he's attractive and no one wants to admit it. I honestly think if it was the exact same cover, with someone who was less attractive, people would not be making as big of a deal of it as they are. This cover isn't going to convert any younger girl from thinking he's a monster into thinking he's a rock star -- those decisions were made long before this, back in April, when this same picture was plastered everywhere else in America.

pajamaralls

@kkmmcc I'm not gonna lie - I was scrolling through Tumblr and went past that cover, gave a quick "Oh, he's cute" and then paused, scrolled back up and "oh. Ooooh. Fuck."

Hellcat

@kkmmcc I have to confess that the outrage over the cover has baffled me, though I understand why it would bring about emotional responses (I haven't read the article). Tons of my friends angrily posted their own feelings on Facebook and I was surprised; it seemed like many people I know believed that the man's face simply being placed on a magazine cover is a deliberate effort by RS to bring fame and fortune and understanding to him--lots of them used the word "glorifying" in their posts, which I don't understand at all (their use of it, I mean; I understand the term itself). I am not sure how to articulate, and I hope I don't sound cold or indifferent or jaded but... it's a cover image related to a story within; it makes sense (to me, at least) that it is there, whether the man is an old troll or a supermodel. I mean, I work in publishing and I also read a lot about very bad people in my spare time, so perhaps my own senses are dulled to stuff like this? But I don't think so! (Honestly, my main issue with it was that there are struggling bands out there who could probably use a break in the form of an RS cover.)

I guess I'm having trouble distinguishing this from, say, that ubiquitous Columbine image or Osama Bin Laden on Time or Newsweek or whatever, or even Charles Manson on the front page of a newspaper. I feel like a bunch of my friends are equating this photo to an advertisement or something, and that's what's baffling to me.

I ended up not commenting anywhere on FB because... I mean, why? So when I saw this post, I figured I could inarticulately blather a little bit here instead. Again, I really hope I don't seem like a monster for not getting the ire (or at least not quite understanding what's driving it).

Nutellaface

WITHAURMS WAD OPAHN

meetapossum

@Nutellaface I'm dying at the alt text. sorry your cruise got canceled :(

lora.bee

@Nutellaface That provided a much-needed laugh this morning, and now that song will be stuck in my head for all of eternity.

Jocasta Carr

@meetapossum CHILL vest and Heteronormative oppression were also both on point, I must say.

j-i-a

@meetapossum there's no question i would have gone on that cruise

Nutellaface

@meetapossum The Hairpin: Come for the articles, stay for the alt text.

meetapossum

@j-i-a It was a 90s dream come true.

ETA: Good news, Jia! There's a similar tour going on right now! And this one has Fastball!

Nutellaface

@meetapossum But it's not a CRUISE. I think half the fun of the cruise is being able to stalk band members because you know EXACTLY WHERE THEY ARE. Not that I would do that. (Yes I would.)

Scandyhoovian

@Nutellaface I am laughing SO HARD at the Creed alt text. Internet won, Jia. Internet won.

j-i-a

@Nutellaface yeah like on the website for the cruise they were advertising "surprise jam sessions" omgomgogmogmogm

that being said i have already considered spending this sunday at the under the sun tour stop in michigan. i have already considered it. i may go.

meetapossum

@Nutellaface According to the episode of Celebrity Wife Swap I watched, Mark McGrath is a helicopter dad.

(I would totally stalk the Gin Blossoms, though.)

raised amongst catalogs

@j-i-a My overwrought reaction to hearing Gin Blossoms' "Found Out About You" is embarrassing to me in the privacy of my own home/car, so I am determined to avoid that concert.

Brunhilde

@meetapossum No Spin Doctors though, that was the real draw for the cruise, right?

meetapossum

@Brunhilde Them and Marcy Playground, obviously.

itiresias

@j-i-a the no comment on karmin was what did it for me

supernintendochalmers

Snooki looks hot in that picture. Clay has awkward posture. Who is Karmin?

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@supernintendochalmers
The only person with a non-ridiculous apparel choice?? That's all I know.

Judith Slutler

@supernintendochalmers oh thank God, I am not the only one who has no clue about Karmin. I do agree that she has the best picture, besides *~Britney~* of course.

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

Though I guess the other figures in the Ricky Martin cover have technically not made ridiculous apparel choices?

And if a Teletubby is not "apparel" (obvi it's not) then Britney is fine, too.

Statham

@supernintendochalmers Karmin is a two person group who has a couple of pop songs out. I think they were originally on one of those "Got Talent" shows or something, but I might be totally wrong.

Nocs

@Statham YouTube sensations, I believe. She gets all the attention, though. Poor dude's just there for occasional harmonies, and so she can use a catchy name instead of whatever her real name is.

j-i-a

@Nocs Karmin is legitimately skilled at moving her tongue around in her mouth (the Look at Me Now cover that made her famous is a technical feat because who can do Busta like Busta) but as for anything else I dunno I dunno I dunno

RebeccaKW

@supernintendochalmers Karmin is a duo (dating in real life), who really got their start on youtube doing covers. They cover 'Super Bass' and she does a pretty good rap. "Crash Your Party" I think was their first song that was played on the radio, etc.

Citizen Christy

I see no problem with the *NSYNC cover. None whatsoever.

questingbeast

Bit confusing that the women from The Hills have been placed underneath the strapline 'Inside a $25000 a night escort service'.

Nocs

That the Ricky Martin cover features a bunch of naked WOMEN is making me giggle uncontrollably right now.

sarah girl

AAHHHHH the Clay cover, don't remind me. My Clay fan days, those were dark times.

j-i-a

@sarah girl talk about heteronormative oppression for him too!!

Tragically Ludicrous

@sarah girl He just looks so awkward and uncomfortable. Who thought anything about that image was a good idea?

Gulfie

@sarah girl Right there with you. I may or may not have traveled seven hours with my mom to see him at the Ohio State Fair and then cried while he sang Bridge Over Troubled Water...

Gulfie

@Gulf of Finland Are these things you admit to people you admire on the internet? Maybe these are not things to admit.

A. Louise

Look at Britney's relatively untouched, less-processed state in that cover image! The nerve, Rolling Stone. You know I can't see things that aren't photoshopped all to shit and be ok with it.

Blackwatch Plaid

@A. Louise I dunno. Her pelvis is pretty butchered.

hallelujah

I truly believe Karmin is the biggest travesty of all of them. LOL'ing really hard at Clay's midriff, though. So sassy!

BenIsAGirl

I've recently been very disappointed with the articles in Rolling Stone. Namely, their piece covering Snoop dogg/Lion openly admitting he had been pumping women out for years as if he was explaining what designer shoes he was wearing. It felt like Stone's lack of commentary on that was just a slap in the face to women. Perhaps I'm just overly sensitive to the issue (working fr a non-profit focused on women and girls) or maybe.... Maybe they are idiots.

TheMissus

@BenIsAGirl
I cancelled my subscription to the Stone several years ago for just that reason. After reading several pieces that came too awfully close to being mysoginistic, I gave up. Though I did keep my Led Zeppelin and Johnny Depp covers (hey, I didn't say I had great taste).

Amphora

@TheMissus Led Zeppelin pictures were the ONLY reason I subscribed to Rolling Stone in high school.

P.J. Morse

@BenIsAGirl In general, Rolling Stone is Entertainment Weekly for dudes with graying hair and ponytails.

Hellcat

@TheMissus Haha--I've still got my Johnny Depp copy too! And I think one with Buffy.

iceberg

excuse YOU ricky martin is wonderf- ohhhh got it.

iceberg

@iceberg also, Ben Affleck cosplaying Dog the Bounty Hunter, I would still hit it.

meetapossum

@iceberg My mom and I saw Evita on Broadway last year and Ricky Martin was in it (and looking AMAZING and was a really great Che), and I was talking to my mom about he was gay. She said, "He can't be gay, he has children!"

Oh, Mom.

jaimebee tho

srsly thought the Good Charlotte article was called "DEATH IN A SMALL TOWN" for a second there, which was confusing but also somehow compelling? Also, I used to find all four of those men, like, blisteringly attractive. MIDDLE SCHOOL WAS A WEIRD TIME FOR US ALL I'M SURE

iceberg

@jaimebee tho ehh I thought the twins were attractive before they got bloaty.

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@jaimebee tho
I think my wife knew them at the time? I'll see if I can get her to offer insight.

jaimebee tho

@iceberg my favorite was the one on the left. I'm confused as to why now! He looks so hungry and sad! He looks like a Hot Topic garment bag! On a wire hanger!

Plants&Rags

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll "Knew them" is a bit strong. A high school friend was dating one of them; we all went to go see them at a D.C. all-ages club—I think they were also in high school at the time. The one at the left was also my favorite. He looked like he was shooting heroin then; at that point I tended to be attracted most to guys who needed someone to take care of them. HIGH SCHOOL WAS A WEIRD TIME ALSO

Something awesome I did in high school/my favorite all-time RS cover—participate in school-spirit week on reverse sex–celebrity day (I went to a cool D.C. public magnet school) with my then-boyfriend (who definitely needed someone to take care of him!) as Courtney Love and me as Kurt Cobain:
http://nevermind20.com/media/press/1992_rolingstone_cover.jpg

iceberg

@Plants&Rags HELLO MRS KEN DOLL you got yourself a good fella :)

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@Plants&Rags
Oh great now everyone knows about how old we are.

Killerpants

@jaimebee tho Logged in just to thumbs up that comment and tell you I did so. Killed me.

Scandyhoovian

Karmin's waist is Movie Eponine levels of "what's going on there?" How many corsets? How much Photoshop? How far is she leaning forward exactly? I have so many questions, and I don't honestly know why I am asking them, because Karmin who!?

Also, I am pretty amazed that "Growing up Clay" AND the alt text AND his face and it still took me reading the tags to the post to remember his last name is Aiken.

pixieg

I don't understand half of these! At least I have Britney to soothe my sads.

pterodactylish

It's a pity that instead of having a serious conversation on why the country is rejecting and freaking out over this story (or at least the image in front of the story) and whether that's appropriate or right, we're making fun of a story that looks at the human side of violent radicalization -- a story that gets to the core and most terrifying aspect of home-grown terrorism. Instead,this just petulantly pokes fun of the magazine's pop culture side.

hallelujah

@pterodactylish you must be soooo much fun at parties

Scandyhoovian

@hallelujah 'cause the rest of the internet isn't currently blowing up on account of actively having that conversation, right?

iceberg

@pterodactylish eh, think of it as a conversation starter - if anyone else wants to have that convo with you, they now have the opportunity.

As for me, I don't care one way or the other about their putting whatshisface on the cover, so it's a non-starter for me. I think maybe RS is so irrelevant that it's just boring and not really worth investing brain energy in.

meetapossum

@iceberg And, in fact, someone started that conversation upthread.

j-i-a

@pterodactylish I also linked to three different and serious angles on the cover image, if you are interested in partaking in that conversation, which is going on in lots of places (and I am interested in that as well, just not able to get there in full, here, this morning)

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

Did you guys know that ANYONE can start a blog about anything at all? It's like, you don't have to wait around until some existing blog talks about what you want to discuss, you can just write up WHATEVER YOU WANT and POST IT ON THE INTERNET! There are websites that will LET YOU DO THIS FOR FREE!

Maybe some of you guys knew this already, but it was news to me. It's a new day, is what I think.

Faintly Macabre

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll I'm much more interested in the hidden meanings of the Ricky Martin cover. Is there subtext in the fact that none of them are really looking at him and most of them look like they're drowned? It even looks like he's holding one's head down with his elbow! Are they saying that his hidden homosexuality is destroying the spirits and sexuality of millions of beautiful potential fangirls? Is his supine pose supposed to mimic that of female Rolling Stone covergirls? WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN? These are important questions.

RoxxieRae

@pterodactylish All this ire made me wonder briefly if Rolling Stone actually matters. Then I remembered... No. It does not.

j-i-a

@RoxxieRae I agree that the mag is past its prime but I have to say, I have totally loved every single thing Matt Taibbi has written about the financial crisis as well as some coverage they've given to global warming, etc

pterodactylish

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll @j-i-a -- true points all around and i've seen those stories and all the others out there, probably, but for me, hairpin has always been my respite from the snark and one-upping jokes of the internet. my favorite parts of hairpin have always be its thoughtful, honest, irreverent at times, and even earnest pieces and conversations (interviews with virgins! my favorite of yours! i read those, and their comments, like two times over)...this felt like snark, less of that real talk vibe.

and oh yeah, journalists are good fun at parties, @hallelujah.

pajamaralls

@j-i-a My current Rolling Stone formula is 1)Article about the cover that I generally don't care about 2) Occasional article about some entertainment figure who, while not cover worthy, is a way more interesting read, and 3) Some good political stuff/Matt Taibbi

RubeksCube

@j-i-a They also did a kick-ass interview with Peter Dinklage not too long ago. Love him.

RoxxieRae

@j-i-a I TOTALLY should have added a caveat for Matt Taibbi, he is definitely doing EXCELLENT journalism.

DoMark

@iceberg Totally agree! I lost all interest in and respect for the magazine in college, when a BOY came to school for a semester (I went to Wellesley), and RS did an "expose" on the fun sexy times that said (awkward, certainly virginal) boy had surrounding by all of those panting girls-without-brains. Thanks for your hard-hitting journalism and your relevance, Rolling Stone.

Big Rig and Jesse

Shocked and amused that article that would start the whole Generation Kill book/miniseries ball (a shining sphere of pure gold, btw) in motion had Clay Aiken on it. Rolling Stone, what is your deal?

supernintendochalmers

@Big Rig and Jesse Is your avatar Coach McGuirk's pecs? And if so, I love it.

OhMarie

@supernintendochalmers IT DEFINITELY IS, I was going to write the same thing. Also while I am here, I laugh every time I see your username.

Big Rig and Jesse

@supernintendochalmers @OhMarie Nailed it! Can we three start the Alliance of Awesome Animation Avatars? Because mine is def. in good company here.

LaLoba

I feel as if I blinked and missed the shimmering moment of pop history that propelled "Karmin" into fame and tiny waists and top-20 in the US and Australia. What is a Karmin

Nocs

@LaLoba She made the cover after some stupid Facebook "pick the cover" contest. I had to defriend several people who would not. stop. begging for votes for Karmin.

RK Fire

@LaLoba I love how this is an ongoing question among the Pintariat. I was wondering the same thing.

It's really unfortunate that I see her name and all I can think is of Charmin.

klemay

"Weird scenes inside the glitter factory"

zamboni

@klemay In many ways, I think that describes my ideal life.
Maybe replace 'glitter' with 'sequins'--MAYBE.

lora.bee

@klemay I hope this is the name of my biography

Bittersweet

@klemay That seemed to be a given to me, looking at Justin's hair in that photo.

stuffisthings

The worst part is that after all this publicity for Rolling Stone every magazine is going to have Hitler on the cover next month. (People are STILL talking about when Time did it!)

CinnamonSwirls

@stuffisthings Or baby hitler

Though someone already said it in those comments I see...

RK Fire

@CinnamonSwirls It is a truth universally acknowledged that whenever there is a contentious discussion on the internet, there will be Hitler reference..

Megasus

Looking at these covers, I highly question that anyone who works at Rolling Stone knows what's cool.

sarah girl

Who remembers when KEANU REEVES was on the cover? My god, I wore that issue out in high school.

highfivesforall

A facebook friend posted a picture, without commentary, of several past magazine covers with terrible people on the cover. I get the point they were going for - this is not the first time that the face of a murderer has been on a magazine cover. However, this misses a crucial aspect - those were all news magazines (except for a Rolling Stone cover with Charles Manson). Rolling Stone puts rock stars and pop icons on their covers almost exclusively - whereas Time and Newsweek will show anything at all as long as it is in the news. Rolling Stone's choice is offensive not because they are a popular magazine, but because they are Rolling Stone, and we make certain assumptions about the people on their covers (regardless of whatever newsy or political content they may have).

ETA: I realize, not actually relevant to the point of this post, which I thought was funny, but I didn't actually have anything to say about it. I just had this thought this morning and figured this would be a good place to put it, since I like talking to y'all about this kind of thing.

de Pizan

The Sugar Ray cover needs more ellipses.

Caitlin Podiak

@de Pizan I read all the comments just to see if anyone was going to mention the ellipses.

DoMark

@de Pizan Sugar Ray... destined to end up as a game show host...

astauff

I recognize that Mark McGrath being on this list is completely legitimate but that song about the halo hanging from the corner of his girlfriend's four post bed was my (inappropriate) jam in fifth grade.

RebeccaKW

@astauff If that song came on the radio right now, I would turn up the volume.

j-i-a

@RebeccaKW i listened to a lot of sugar ray over fourth of july weekend, not gonna even lie

Amphora

@astauff A big part of my entry into puberty was watching him shove his crotch into the camera in that video.

shantasybaby

@astauff @de Pizan Not really on topic, but in the Sugar Ray heyday I was obstensibly a lesbian but also weirdly attracted to Mark McGrath and got my girlfriend to wear a sweater vest with no shirt under it like he does in one of his videos. Why?!

zamboni

@shantasybaby This is incredibly hilarious and I appreciate your sharing it.

Spaghettius!

@shantasybaby I have been trying to find a way to wear a sweater vest as a shirt for years now. Obviously I should just time travel and body-snatch Mark McGrath.
...maybe I already did

RebeccaKW

@Spaghettius! I wore sweater vests as shirts in the 90's. Of course, they were styled after Cher Horowitz sweater vests, so they weren't sexy or anything, but still. Loved them.

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