Wednesday, June 19, 2013


What About a Prance to Romance To?

The video for John Mayer's new song "Paper Doll" features none other than our old friend Joanna Rohrback, who starts things off by coyly warning all pregnant or nursing viewers to "consult a physician before you Romancercise." With Rohrback pony-bopping peacefully in silent, leafy suburbia, a series of rumored Taylor Swift digs in the lyrics, and the fact that Mayer's audio game hasn't changed a bit since Room for Squares came out in 2001, this video has everything.

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Well, John Mayer is totally cool to my wallet, anyway, because I can just listen to what I already have by him and get the same general effect. I get that he has a certain sound, but considering it hasn't evolved even a little bit since he first started, I'm starting to wonder what the point is when he releases "new" things.

That said, his sound is pretty perfect for prancercising. I almost want someone to CGI a rainbow or two in there for effect.


The man is so skeevy. I find it weird that his music is more or less easy-listening. His image and his music don't match.


@HMSBeagle My friends and I were so infatuated with him in high school because his music was all about being sweet and awkward and then he got really famous and turned out to be pretty much the worst person. I will never be completely over that heartbreak.


@Gulf of Finland Yeah, I've heard some terrible stories. How does he get the ladies?

screwball cate

"However, if you're not pregnant or nursing, why not consult ~~Jared~~." What does this mean. Is Jared her husband? Son? Is she trying to get us pregnant with her family members?


@screwball cate i was wondering this as well!


@screwball cate Yeah she's definitely trying to hook her son up.

screwball cate

@iceberg Holy hell.


Weidest video ever! But lyrics and melody make up for it! It's like watching your great aunt and grandma trying to jog.@n

Heat Signature

Also unchanged since 2001: John Mayer's immaturity.


@Heat Signature Seriously, did a 16 year old write this song?


2 of the best things america has done in the last week (aside from yeezus) rolled into one.


I actually love John Mayer, dumb as his personal life is. I thought this song was uncharacteristically bad, though.

Maybe because I couldn't get over the Taylor Swift digs, since I hate her so much it makes me angry when she gets any attention for anything. But also, it sounds lazy and boring.

That said, prancercise forever.


Horrible people deserve each other, the end.


While I abhor John Mayer on a personal level, is this a safe space for me to say that I find his music reliably enjoyable and relaxing? Like, I don't think I'd run out and buy any of it, but I rarely change the radio station if he comes on while I'm in the car.

::throws self away::

honey cowl

I love John Mayer's music & I do not care who knows it. I own all of his albums & I strongly disagree with the idea that his sound hasn't changed since Room for Squares.

I also love Taylor Swift's music, so do with that what you will...

honey cowl



This is the only way I could ever voluntarily listen to an entire John Mayer song so I haven't really heard much of him. I have to admit though that it was pleasantly bland and relaxing, like a bowl of oatmeal, or a glass of lukewarm water. The prancing is what really made it though, obviously.

Azaz the Unabridged

I have absolutely no idea why, but about halfway through this I zoned out and imagined her blithely prancersizing through all 3 stages of Ninja Warrior.


Pete Rose is the ultimate case of me not being able to separate the artist from the art (sorry, no Hall of Fame for you, Pete). But John Mayer is testing my strongly held belief. He is a great songwriter and singer and musician. But as a person or boyfriend? The image of him in a neon green mankini or commenting on JSimp makes me cringe. But in the end, it's hard not to like Room For Squares. Maybe he will mature and be the person he is capable of becoming.


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