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Monday, June 10, 2013

67

Daytime Booty Calls

1.

U still up

Yeah I mean I woke up 4 hours ago

So u just plow through the day like that
No naps before noon
That’s kinda hot ;-)

Thanks

So you’re prob gonna be up for another like 12 hours huh

Yeah

That’s cool that’s like exactly half a day

I can’t really talk right now, I’m at work

 

2.

Where r u

At my desk

U wanna meet up

So like u would roll ur desk chair over here
And look at my comp screen

I guess
Ya that could be fun
I could see all your tabs ;-)

I only have like three tabs open right now

Maybe we could open some new tabs together ;-)

So like both of our hands would be on the mouse at once

Ya on top of each other
Or u hold the mouse + I pull the cord part

Idk, maybe later

 

3.

Cvome overrrrrrtrrrrrr

I can’t right now, I’m on a deadline
R u drunk
It’s like 2 pm

Heh lil bit

I thought you’d be at work right now
At Google

Heh I don’t work at google
I work ON google

So I like google cool stuff
At my house
I just googled Montana

What why

Idk maybe cuz it’s the FOURTH BIGGEST STATE IN THE FRIKKIN COUNTRY
It’s hugeeeeee
Like me ;-) :-*

So you get paid to get drunk and Google huge stuff

Heh no it’s more of an uh
Unpaid internship
If u catch my drift

Is that a sex thing

No I am just not paid at all
But I pretend I work at google at bars
Hey so r u here yet

[no response]

 

Mae Rice enjoys eating tacos, gchatting with Mel, and watching The Voice like it is her job. 

67 Comments / Post A Comment

iceberg

bahahaha "I can’t really talk right now, I’m at work"

well done Mae! (also I like your name :)

whizz_dumb

I wouldn't say I'm the best at flirting, but this makes me feel suave and seductive--by comparison.

Emby

I mean, sometimes you get bored and amorous at work.

ColdFinger

@Emby I have definitely wanted to have this exchange in the past. I AM, in fact, paid to google things.

smidge

@ColdFinger dream job.

Slutface

I don't know when the last time someone texted me was :(

leonstj

@Slutface - Do moms count? I feel like text messaging was invented by, or at the very least on behalf of, moms. ( <3 you ma, but not everything needs to be a group text)

fondue with cheddar

@Slutface I would totally text you if I had your number. I would even write out the word "you."

Slutface

@fondue with cheddar The funny thing is, when people do text me, I'm all annoyed and saying to myself, "WHY ARE THEY TEXTING ME?! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

As you can see, I'm easy to please.

Emby

@Slutface Like me ;-) :-*

fondue with cheddar

@Slutface Yeah, getting texts is pretty annoying a lot of the time. Remember back when you had the freedom to not hear from people when you weren't home? Or to say you weren't home to avoid communicating with someone?

Lily Rowan

@leon s Seriously? My mother called me yesterday and said "If I knew how to text, this is the kind of question I would text you..." The woman has an iPhone!!!!

stonefruit

@leon s My dad signs his texts, and it is among the sweetest things I get to experience.

Like so:

"Love
Dad"

Once it was,

"Love
Sad

[two seconds]

I meant Dad!"

EdgyLatinist

@stonefruit My dad also does that! My roommates have taken to calling him "Semiformal Latinist's Dad." (I swear it has a nicer ring to it when you use his actual name.)

redheaded&crazy

@stonefruit my dad signs his texts "LOL Dad"

(the LOL stands for lots of love)

stonefruit

@redheaded&crazy oh my lord, my dad reconnected with a close friend from high school who came out later in life, and the friend apparently uses LOL in all his emails, and after a few emails, my dad finally said, "[stonefruit], what does LOL mean? Is this a gay thing?"

I don't know what he was imagining but it a little bit broke my heart to explain it to him. This was a few years ago, and now my dad uses LOL profligately.

fondue with cheddar

@redheaded&crazy That is adorable. Oh, dads. :)

fondue with cheddar

@redheaded&crazy I love you LOL Dad

EdgyLatinist

@fondue with cheddar I once got a text from my dad that said "Dear Latinist, okie dokie. Love, Dad." Dad with an iPhone is just nonstop entertainment.

fondue with cheddar

@EdgyLatinist Seriously, you all have the cutest dads. Mine doesn't text much, but when he does he's very succinct the way the kids are these days. He uses more abbreviations than I do!

iceberg

@fondue with cheddar My dad doesn't text me anymore because overseas, but when he did it was always ALL CAPS. Dad! Stop shouting!

beecaveroad

@stonefruit my dad does this too! (Reviews texts) Or he used to, anyway. Maybe he caught on the fifth or sixth time I teased him for writing texts like emails. On the other hand I now know where my urge to end every sentence with an exclamation point comes from.

sophia_h

@Lily Rowan If my mother only had a cellphone or a computer, soooo many of my life's problems would be solved. She would still email me asking me to look up something on IMDB for her but at least it wouldn't be a ten minute voicemail.

meetapossum

@fondue with cheddar My dad only texts me pictures of deer he's shot or warnings about the weather. My mom looooves abbreviations, though.

omgkitties

@fondue with cheddar Mine too. I've saved one text conversation with him - after I sent him several photos of some successful home projects that I'd borrowed his drill for, he replied 'very good'. THE HEIGHT OF ALL PRAISE!

does it need saying

@sophia_h my grammy has email and she mass-emails everyone to ask me to snopes this chain letter for her.

fondue with cheddar

@does it need saying That's awesome that your grammy knows what snopes is and also wants to know what they have to say about things. I wish my grandparents didn't believe everything that people emailed to them.

fabel

god, the way you stay awake the whole day--over HALF an entire day, really--it gets me. so hot. hahaha I love it.

Probs

"It's 3am somewhere"

iceberg

wat u up to

nm, just making an Excel spreadsheet

u should come spread my sheets lol

[no response]

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@iceberg i would excel at spreading ur sheets

zamboni

@iceberg died. I'm dead. Stay tuned for "Daytime Booty Calls From A Ghost"

Judith Slutler

@iceberg I'll... auto... your cad???

iceberg

@Judith Slutler let me Photo ur shop baby

because Photoshop get it

Judith Slutler

@iceberg I'll take you to the photoshop

I'll let you lick the lollipop

RK Fire

@iceberg
I'll power your point
I'll S.P. your.. S.S... hm.

Judith Slutler

@RK Fire All I've got is "I'll sneak past your secret spot", which, not quite sexy?

RK Fire

@Judith Slutler Sorry, I was referencing the program SPSS but I wanted to emphasize that each letter should be read out loud so... yeah, I messed up that joke.

It's like Excel but it handles bigger data! Yeah. I'll handle your data.. (I can't help myself.)

Judith Slutler

@RK Fire My boyfriend is getting his PhD in social psych. I know.

Also I'll social your psychology LOL ;)

maritimah

@iceberg Everytime someone asks me to "touch base" on something, I say (silently to myself or sometimes out loud) "oh, I'll touch your base alright". It seems to go over well.

fondue with cheddar

@RK Fire "I'll fire your fox"

Apocalypstick

@fondue with cheddar "...for workplace harassment".

blueblazes

@iceberg
Something something bulk uploader something something hootsuite.

sceps yarx

@maritimah my friend Matt has a joke he makes with words that end with "er". Like, if you say "is this Kosher?" he would say "kosher? I hardly know her!"

iceberg

@sceps yarx hehe we love that one.

fondue with cheddar

@sceps yarx That one is funniest when it doesn't make any sense.

Judith Slutler

"heh my thighs are all bruised, how did that happen?"

- me, sexting from the studio, 3 beers in

Judith Slutler

@Judith Slutler also i think i just saved my file with the very descriptive ending of _fuckutrees

what I'm trying to say here is, it's 10 pm my time. #livinginternationally

Bittersweet

Here's an example of my husband's and my "sexy" texts, after 17 years of marriage:

can you pick up N from art class? i'm stuck at work til 6 :-(

yes

thanks! love you the most! <3<3<3

ok

If you read between the two letters of my husband's texts, there's a lot of excitement there.

OhMarie

@Bittersweet My last "sext" to my husband was complaining about a very loud sex session in the hotel room next to mine while I was on a business trip. :(

fondue with cheddar

@Bittersweet The fact that he actually writes out "ok" (as opposed to "k") shows how much he cares.

iceberg

@OhMarie if the kids go to sleep early enough we should do things tonight

Bittersweet

@iceberg unless the dog barges in :-(

Megasus

I'm unemployed right now, I could totally do this.

Megasus

@Megasus HAHAHAHAHAHA (too late dude, I totally saw it!!)

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@Megasus
Just occurred to me you might not want it to be that public!

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@Megasus
I actually kind of envy how much fun you seem to be having.

mystique

@Megasus ahhh what was it?!

Emby

@mystique I know, I'm all curious now!

Darcy

hahahahaaha... :D
gatwick airport car parking

Jinxie

@Darcy Whut?

stonefruit

@Jinxie These spam accounts are getting out of control lately.

HildaSat04

Asher. if you think Ruth`s blurb is exceptional... last thursday I got a great new Alfa Romeo from earning $7500 this past 5 weeks and more than 10/k last munth. with-out any question its the best job I've had. I began this four months/ago and almost straight away started making a nice at least $87 per hour. , Bow6.com

nanny hii

I don't know when the last time someone texted me was

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