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Thursday, April 25, 2013

534

'Game of Thrones' Men, by Hotness

26. Viserys Targaryen
25. Joffrey Baratheon
24. Loras Tyrell
23. Theon Greyjoy
22. Samwell Tarly
21. Gendry
20. Stannis Baratheon
19. The Black Smoke
18. Lead White Walker
17. Jon Snow
16. Jojen Reed
15. Ser Davos Seaworth
14. Podrick
13. Renly Baratheon
12. Robert Baratheon
11. Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish
10. Ser Jorah Mormont
9. Bronn
8. Robb Stark
7. Sandor 'The Hound' Clegane
6. Tywin Lannister
5. Tyrion Lannister
4. Jaime Lannister
3. Jaqen H'ghar
2. Khal Drogo
1. Eddard 'Ned' Stark

534 Comments / Post A Comment

apples and oranges

Podrick ranks better than Jon Snow?! And ANYONE ranks worse than Joffrey?! EDITH.

meetapossum

@kangerine Yeah! I am not really a Kit Harrington-looks fan, but Viserys should definitely be much higher. Also, Gendry is #1.

@serenityfound

@meetapossum Noooooo Viserys is the worst. Slimey little limp-haired weasel man.

Gulfie

@kangerine I'm actually totally behind Viserys at the bottom, yep

Amphora

@@serenityfound I actually stopped watching the first season for a long time cause I couldn't stand to see his creepy bathtub sex scenes.

JessAndNo21

@kangerine sigh i can't think of Gendry as anyone but Chris from Skins and therefore perpetually a tweaker.

Megasus

@JessAndNo GENDRY AT LEAST MAKES TOP TEN COME ON
Also I am a pretty big GoT fan and have no idea what you mean by The Black Smoke? Are we talking the Black Smoke in the opening credits now because NO THAT MAKES ME SAD EVERY TIME.

@serenityfound

@Megasus The weird smoke baby of the Red Lady and Stannis, which is, in fact, hotter than Stannis, Viserys, & Joffrey.

Megasus

@@serenityfound Oooh I would have called him "Shadow Man" personally

Slapfight

@meetapossum I think you and I have the same list...

Olivia2.0

@Megasus I thought maybe it was lost reference thrown in to make the fangirls ANGRY but no, I guess @serenityfound is right and it's Melissandrie's smoke bebe

Virginia

@kangerine You're right...plus he's got no penis...should that exclude him from this list?

meetapossum

@Virginia Grey Worm doesn't have a penis either, but he's going to be on my list once he makes an appearance in the show:

slanket

@meetapossum And are you excited for Daario's appearance?!?!

meetapossum

@slanket Sort of? I'm looking forward to Dany fans to get frustrated with her (WELCOME TO MY WORLD), but I'm really bummed out he doesn't have a forked beard and blue hair.

slanket

@meetapossum Agreed. I'm not a big Daario fan, but I'm a fan of Dany's sexual urges toward him. Excited for hot, frustrated, and guilty sexual tension.

hoo:ha

@kangerine yeah.... We've been calling it "Pussy Demon"

michealjohn

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jams

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jamsbond

It makes me so satisfied your vast understanding and wisdom have a new channel for trying into the world.

is bubblegum casting legitimate

michealjohn

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stavros

hope you keep up the good work.@m

iceberg

WRONG.

RealCambridge

@iceberg A million times yes. This alone should put Gendry in the top 3.

iceberg

@iceberg and #1 should be

iceberg

@iceberg also Petyr Baelish's coats, which I lust after unhealthily.

olivia

@iceberg NOOOOOOOOOOOO TOO BEEFY DISLIKE.

olivia

@iceberg but I do agree with the Gendry GIF

Hot Doom

@iceberg Gendry has a face like a baseball mitt
*ducks*

Somewhere my love

@Hot Doom You can come sit by me.

the roughest toughest frail

@Hot Doom Preach. The body is beyond reproach. Everything north of his shoulders, however ...

Edith Zimmerman

@iceberg Whatever he should stand up straighter....

Nicole Cliffe

@Edith Zimmerman Yeah, call Tywin. Motherfucker has some patrician grace.

dontannoyme

@iceberg I've never even seen this programme but that clip looks like what those annoying women filmstars do on the red carpet at premieres - sort of turn and look backwards over their shoulders in a thinly veiled "Have you seen my waist? Have you seen my back? Here, have a look at my boobs and then I'll turn around so you can take as many photos as you like of my bum - oh but don't worry. I'll contort myself so you can see my bum and my face at the same time. Oh but by the way, it's all about the character and, as an actor, I really appreciated this film blah blah".

districter

@iceberg this is all I need for today. Thank you.

Also so upset I missed this whole conversation!

packedsuitcase

@iceberg OMG. OMG. OMG. That GIF. I just got to work but I feel like maybe I need some alone time now.

packedsuitcase

@packedsuitcase For reference, that was about Khal Drogo. Otherwise known as the man in spots 1-5 of my "5 hottest guys in TV/movies" list.

iceberg

@packedsuitcase RIGHT? even wearing eyeliner and most probably smelling terrible he could get it any day of the week.

parallel-lines

@iceberg Seriously. This dude will defend your honor and protect your young!

I cried a little bit Sunday night picturing him in dothraki heaven watching his girl be HBIC all over those valerians and thought he must be so proud of her.

Seriously, he is in another league from those british nancyboys

Crumbling Slut

@iceberg Agreed, ballin coat here.I had to complete the GIF though. Couldn't post one without the other.

Rose_H_Tyler

@Crumbling Slut Love Varys's expressions in this. He's awesome!

The Dilettantista

Yeah uh, Gendry and Jon Snow need to be MUCH higher on the list, and Sandor "The Hound" Clegane should be lower as should Ned Stark (sorry Sean Bean doesn't do it for me). Jon Snow is EASILY a top five. I don't understand this. I am confused and will not answer the question.

Amphora

@The Dilettantista Pssst check out the picture and the alt-text

terrific

WHY IS GENDRY #21.

Top 5 AT LEAST

redheaded&crazy

Jaqen H'ghar IS pretty hot. I always pictured him not having a nose, I think I must have mixed up the descriptions of the different caged up dudes and then was forever confused. This happens frequently because I skim read rather than ... actually pay attention to details. Details! I shun your details!

Hot Doom

@redheaded&crazy Jaqen is SUCH a fox, or maybe I'm just attracted to someone who could act as a hitman-genie for me.

@serenityfound

@Hot Doom "Hitman-genie" is definitely at the top of my list of "potential mate's occupations".

entangled

@redheaded&crazy yeah, it is either Biter or Rorge that doesn't have a nose. and it's driving me nuts that I can't remember which one.

sophia_h

@entangled it's Rorge *shudder*

lasso tabasco

WHAT. Jon Snow is #1 in my heart/vagina FOREVERRRRRR

lasso tabasco

@lasso tabasco Except Jagen H'ghar. I can barely even look at him.

themlemons

@lasso tabasco Right?! He's a goddamn L'Oreal commercial. (Jon Snow, I mean. Someone post that gif!)

themlemons

@the roughest toughest frail Yesssss. Someday I will learn.

pterodactgirl

@the roughest toughest frail

Somewhere my love

@lasso tabasco
I'm just going to say it: the actors playing Jon Snow and Robb Stark should switch parts, Richard Madden 4eva.

Somewhere my love

@Somewhere my love
*cackles*

zoe
zoe

@lasso tabasco JON SNOWWWWW!!!!!! #17? pppfffffffftttttttttt

RealCambridge

Woah woah woah, Tywin Lanister ranked higher than the Hound AND Ser Jorah? No way. Although he is a very handsome man, he's not top 10 material.
Related, I miss staring at both Khal Drogo and Jaqun H'ghar.

Rose_H_Tyler

@RealCambridge Love your avatar!

meetapossum

EDITH

meetapossum

I am also upset with them for casting Iwan Rheon as Ramsay because of reasons.

@serenityfound

@meetapossum mmmyes

laurel

@meetapossum It's fun to watch Arya start puberty during that Gendry-at-the-forge scene.

katiemcgillicuddy

@meetapossum I do not watch Game of Thrones (I know, I know) but I hear Iwan Rheon plays a rather despicable character and so now I shall offer up Simon Bellamy because, oh my god, Simon:

Crumbling Slut

@katiemcgillicuddy I love Simon! I watch GOT was disappointed his character is horrible there but means more eye candy for me. :)

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@katiemcgillicuddy Oh god, Simon! Look at your life! Look at your choices!

katiemcgillicuddy

@Crumbling Slut @I'm Right on Top of that, Rose Simon!!! Aaaaaand I have fallen down a rabbit-hole of Simon/Simon & Alisha gifs.

Crumbling Slut

@katiemcgillicuddy @I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

laurel

@pterodactgirl It's important, somehow, that she's eating during that scene.

@serenityfound

@pterodactgirl I want to give this more than one thumbs up BUT I CAN'T.

@serenityfound

@laurel Something about symbolism and oral fixation or the sex-consumption link?

pterodactgirl

@@serenityfound Unlimited thumbs up for Gendry's bod.

Crumbling Slut

@katiemcgillicuddy
Fanning myself.

katiemcgillicuddy

@Crumbling Slut A little NSFW but...

katiemcgillicuddy

@katiemcgillicuddy

Crumbling Slut

@katiemcgillicuddy I could do this all night.

katiemcgillicuddy

@Crumbling Slut I could do them all night, too. Oh, you said "this" not "them". Got it. Right. Same.

Megasus

@meetapossum Hahahah so someone made the following joke about last week's GoT: "So it looks like this week Theon and that nice boy are getting a house together." STILL SLAYS ME.

meetapossum

@Megasus Or do you mean...still flays you?

redheaded&crazy

My top 5 would be

1. Jaime Lannister
2. Khal Drogo
3. I guess Tv show Jaqen H'ghar since has been revealed to have a nose
4. Jon Snow when he doesn't have his stupid face on.
5. definitely Bronn. That dirty scoundrel shit really does it for me.

redheaded&crazy

you know the face I'm talking about.

redheaded&crazy

it's his most of the time face.

redheaded&crazy

@redheaded&crazy and really the hound is one of my favourites too. I'd do him. Poor guy. He can't help having a brute for a brother!

He would scorn my sympathetic murmerings though. That could be a mood killer.

meetapossum

@redheaded&crazy

DullHypothesis

@redheaded&crazy Have you seen Hot Fuzz? Hound = Tall YARP guy from Hot Fuzz. Still want to have sex with him.

redheaded&crazy

@DullHypothesis yarrrrrp.

MilesofMountains

@redheaded&crazy It's his always face.

Somewhere my love

@MilesofMountains Well it makes sense, he knows nothing.

stonefruit

@somewhere.my.love Jesus, finally. This joke has been just standing on the sidelines, aching to play.

Somewhere my love

@stonefruit Had to be done. No regrets.

stonefruit

@somewhere.my.love yup. #YOLO

Nate Jones@twitter

From my time in GOT fandom, it seems Gendry is way too low here and Littlefinger way too high. Anyone agree?

olivia

@Nate Jones@twitter YES WHY. Littlefinger should NOT be that high. I mean HONESTLY. Also Joffrey should be last for sure.

Meredith L.

@Nate Jones@twitter I have leftover lady boners from when Littlefinger was cheaty well-intentioned Mayor Carcetti.

Hot Doom

@Nate Jones@twitter But littlefinger and his prettily cut coats and manscaping is so saaaxxxxxy is a dirty pimp way.

Rose_H_Tyler

@Nate Jones@twitter Agreed! I always found Littlefinger kind of creepy.

Catina Wig

@Rose_H_Tyler but HOT CREEPY amiright? lol.

Nocs

@Meredith L. Mayor Petyr Carcetti Littlefinger FOREVA.

Rose_H_Tyler

@Catina Wig sorry just regular creepy to me! But then I put Viserys in my top six so who am I to judge?

cinnamonskin

@Meredith L. I cannot keep the character names straight, so I just call him Carcetti. "Was it Carcetti who banged his sister? No?" are the GoT pregame kind of conversations our house has.

Also, Renly's name is "The Hipster King".

@serenityfound

UM HEY. There is no way Ser Jorah ranks below The Hound AND Tywin. Also, Renly is/was definitely hotter than Robert. Also also, Loras > Theon, right?

@serenityfound

@@serenityfound Also, I will incite all the rage by suggesting that Jaime wouldn't be in my top 5. He is so pretty as to be intimidating and that puts me way off. [braces self]

darthvadersmom

@@serenityfound you speak so much truth. however, loras vs. theon could be revisited if theon shaves.

Hot Doom

@@serenityfound RIGHT.

Edith Zimmerman

Hahahah this is going great

@serenityfound

@Edith Zimmerman This was all just a cheap ploy for beefcakey gifs, wasn't it?

redheaded&crazy

@Edith Zimmerman hey it looks like sean bean is all yours so I'd call it a win!

meetapossum

@Edith Zimmerman

laurel

@Edith Zimmerman Troll!

iceberg

@meetapossum ow, right in the ovaries.

laurel

@iceberg I can only take Robb seriously when he's covered in blood and fur and dirt and armor.

the roughest toughest frail

@redheaded&crazy mmm Sean Bean. He's the only reason I watched that crap "Lady Chatterley" mini-series.

Also the comments are hilarious and wonderful. Moar GIFs, please.

Somewhere my love

@laurel I could take him anywhere...

ETA: Unf.

TheBourneApproximation

@Edith Zimmerman This list is like tossing a raw steak into a cage of hungry bears.

barefoot cuntessa

@meetapossum Eh. I love a good beard. But it has to be a GOOD beard. Sparse fuzzies, no thanks.

Hot Doom

@meetapossum This gif makes me feel giggly and weird, like when cute 14 year old boys played ping pong with me when I was 8 and I couldn't stop smirking.

ETA: In other words, this makes me want to barf on myself, in a good way.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@Edith Zimmerman You know nothing, Edith Snow.

KaliMelt

@meetapossum Swoon swoon. I am giggling by myself.

Terror of the 416

Aw, Samwell. Due to my fondness for nice, oversized dudes, I would rank him higher. Also, is it possible to negative rank someone? (Joffrey.)

iceberg

who's the Riverrun guy that couldn't shoot the arrow properly, he's kind of hot in a sneery way.

@serenityfound

@iceberg Cat's brother?

meetapossum

@iceberg Edmure!

iceberg

@meetapossum yeah that guy. i like his scaley armor too.

meetapossum

@iceberg The fish scales! Tully armor is the coolest.

Amphora

@meetapossum Thank you I couldn't figure out who he was! Love his WTF look.

[sic]

@iceberg It's Brutus!

RubeksCube

@iceberg You mean Brutus?? (Where are my fellow Rome fans?)
@[sic] YES!!!!

Amphora

@RubeksCube No wonder he's so familiar! Poor Brutus, shit did NOT work out for him...

Valley Girl

@[sic] The great productive values + beefcake factor of GoT reminds me SO much of Rome <3

RubeksCube

@Amphora true story. Poor Brutus and his adorable/treacherous face.

sophia_h

@[sic] I was so amused when they cast Tobias Menzies, because I love Edmure and Brutus in exactly the same way. Noble, a little whiny, and just doomed by the cutthroat worlds they live in.

Fat Apollo

@iceberg Oh, fishscales duh -- all I could see were black ruffles and olive sequins.

MrsTeacherFace

@RubeksCube First Caesar, now Brutus! When will Atia make an appearance? There are, apparently, only so many good actors with British accents.

anachronistique

@MrsTeacherFace My friends have a long-running joke about how there are Only Twenty British Actors Ever, and the more projects you see with the same people in them the funnier it gets.

Inspector Tiger

@anachronistique this is so true! I love watching Harry Potter for that reason. Every year there's a new teacher and you can count it's from the apparently very small English Actors Bucket...

stonefruit

Ann: I keep getting outbid by someone called Tall Tyrion Lannister. What kind of name is that?
Donna: Are you kidding me? Tyrion Lannister? Lord of Casterly Rock? The Half Man? You don't watch Game of Thrones?
Ann: No, do you?
Donna: Hell, yeah! Have you seen those Dothraki dudes? They can get it! Everyone on that show can get it!

vernon hardapple

@stonefruit Sidebar - where does "can get it" come from?! It is all over this thread in many hilarious ways. Pop culture references: school me.

meetapossum

I can do this all night, guys.

redheaded&crazy

@meetapossum yes please

Amphora

@meetapossum He looks like if the actor who played Gollum was in Interview with the Vampire.

martinipie

@meetapossum A MAN COULD GET IT

Danzig!

@meetapossum seems like that guy's eyes and hairline mutually agreed to flee from one another

knockout

@meetapossum His face and sometimes demeanor remind me of Andy Botwin. But only quick flashes of Andy. Both please me greatly.

Inspector Tiger

@meetapossum I decided not to go to a free GoT-Viewing in my city and then afterwards it turned out that Tom Wlaschiha was there for a meet&greet and there were so many huggy photos and he was "so nice" and...wwaaaahhh.

meetapossum

@Inspector Tiger Ohhh noo :(

stonefruit

@martinipie whyyyyyyyyy oh whyyyy can I not like this more than once.

Edith Zimmerman

@knockout ASTOUNDING call

rianne marie

@Amphora holy shit that made me laugh so hard and so suddenly that it was mostly coughing. You are a genius.

magnowlia

@martinipie WELL DONE YOU!!!

noodge

Is this where I get to brag about mr. noodge looking not unlike jon snow? Because..,,

bitzyboozer

You crazy for this one.

meetapossum

Let's not forget the handsome new addition of Beric Dondarrion

redheaded&crazy

@meetapossum yessss the addition of skull fucking to my GoT fantasies

redheaded&crazy

@redheaded&crazy too far?

redheaded&crazy

@redheaded&crazy yes that was too far

meetapossum

@redheaded&crazy Never too far.

DullHypothesis

@meetapossum YUM, he's the sexist quasi-undead bannerless warrior in the entire seven kingdoms!

@serenityfound

@DullHypothesis The sexist or the sexiest? Or both?

martinipie

@meetapossum I find Thoros HELLA hot, probably because of my previously-stated-elsewhere-on-the-pin attraction to man-buns...

meetapossum

@martinipie I'm more into Anguy, personally.

martinipie

@meetapossum So cute and jovial! Yes please. let's be real, I am into pretty much everyone on this show, male or female.

meetapossum

@martinipie I was just thinking the same thing. I really don't think I'm not attracted to anyone on Game of Thrones.

MrsTeacherFace

@meetapossum Kind of like a Medieval Jim from The Office.

LaLoba

@meetapossum I have been readying this entire list in shocked astonishment for the lack of Lighting Lords. Perhaps I'm also having a difficult time parsing out how to not factor in character traits and questionable actions but keep the sense of stylish walking and bombastic swaggers that kick it UP.

meetapossum

@LaLoba

After his fight with the Hound there will be many more Beric gifs to add. <3 u, Lightning Lord.

Quick Brown Fox

@meetapossum YUP. Anguy is my guy. Even after two seasons of many special ladyparts feels, that actor just makes me feel exxxtra special.

MilesofMountains

The correct list goes
1. Jaime
2. Gendry
3. Drogo
4. Jorah
5. Tyrion when he's not talking
6. Ned

The rest are as useless as nipples on a breastplate.

stonefruit

@MilesofMountains What the WHAT? Tyrion is the best when he's talking! He's so smart and caustic!

... I may have revealed more about myself than I meant to with that comment.

MilesofMountains

@stonefruit I would agree if it weren't for the accent. I can't stand it it's so bad!

They should have just made him have an inexplicable American accent.

stonefruit

@MilesofMountains Oh dear. To my (I thought reasonably well-trained but apparently actually barbarian) American ears, I thought it sounded just fine :(

@serenityfound

@stonefruit @MilesofMountains I recognize how terrible his accent is but still love him and his snarky intelligence.

sophia_h

@MilesofMountains Yes, his accent is goofy, but Peter Dinklage is so hot to me. Top 3 at least, maybe #1.

boheem

@MilesofMountains But.. he sounds like Eddie Izzard, who is an actual Brit, so surely it's okay? All the Lannister kids have different accents, though.

timesnewroman

@MilesofMountains Ha, I'm English, and I don't think it's that bad. I mean, there is a lot lot worse.

Apocalypstick

@timesnewroman Oh, it's meant to be English? As a fellow Brit, I thought it was absurd on purpose, because of how the Lannisters set themselves apart, but I guess the others don't actually talk like that.

timesnewroman

@Apocalypstick Yeah same, I didn’t necessarily realise he was American until I googled all the actors’ nationalities quite recently. I was however certain that Sersie (sp??)(Joffrey’s mum) was American and was surprised to discover she was British, so I suppose the weird way she speaks is just her ACTING VOICE

Gulfie

5. Everybody else
4. Jaquen
3. Gendry
2. Jorah
1. Jaime

Kingslayer gives me lady boners all day long

iceberg

@Gulf of Finland His accent is slipping so much more this season and it only makes him hotter.

alannaofdoom

@iceberg - Also he wears the grime so well! Like, don't bother bathing, friend, just get over here.

Just me?

Gulfie

@Gulf of Finland Gah Jaqen. I thought about it too!

Alli525

@alannaofdoom: I have promised my roommate that she can have first--fifth dibs on Jaime, as long as she drags him into the shower for the fifth round. Then he's all mine. Grime is her thing, not mine, but... still...

packedsuitcase

@alannaofdoom Not just you. He is second to Drogo for me, but given that Drogo only ever comes on the show to make me sad now (House of the Undying, I'm looking at you!), I would ride Kingslayer all night long.

Meredith L.

Lannister placement is dead on.

BUT IRL, VISARYS IS THE GREAT GRANDSON OF CHARLES DICKENS (also Robb's wife is Charlie Chaplin's grandaughter? Is England THAT small?) SO THAT'S COOL THAT I'M ATTRACTED TO HIM, SURE.

Hot Doom

@Meredith L. Yes, it is that small.

meetapossum

@Meredith L. Yeah, I don't care what anyone says. Viserys is awful, but Harry Lloyd is hot.

@serenityfound

@meetapossum Holy carp. In Googling to verify this, I also discovered he played Will Scarlett in Robin Hood and I loved him there. Props to him and the GoT crew for making a gorgeous man seem absolutely unfuckable.

the roughest toughest frail

@@serenityfound OH MY GOD. I did not recognize him without the Will Scarlett dirty sanchez moustache. He's much prettier when he's not in character.

par_parenthese

@meetapossum HOLD THE FUCK UP, HARRY LLOYD IS IN THIS SHOW??!

HereKitty

@Meredith L. Spoiler, but not really: Depends on what season you're watching.

In the rankings of DVD commentary participants, it goes Harry Lloyd about eleventy-seven times, then everybody else.

saritasara

@meetapossum THANK YOU!
Will Scarlett embodies all the feelings. And deep in my heart I kind of hate GoT for ruining him like that. >_<

timesnewroman

@Meredith L. No, England is not that small. It's more about Posh Kids get Acting Gigs.

anachronistique

@the roughest toughest frail Between that, Viserys, and his utterly creepy turn as one of the Family of Blood on Doctor Who, I'm thinking that's true as a general thing.

timesnewroman

I like actors who can act repulsive but are actually hot/normal in real life and I think he’s one of them! V creepy in Dr Who.

par_parenthese

@timesnewroman @anachronistique I LOVED him in Iron Lady (where his portrayal of a young Mr. Thatcher is so charming and sweet that I forget I basically 100% disagree with the real Mr. Thatcher's political positions) and it was such a relief to see how hot/normal he is IRL since he freaks me right the fuck out as Son of Mine. *shudders*

HunnyBee

I've seen every episode of this show and I only recognize like one-third of these names. WHO CAN KEEP TRACK OF ALL THESE CHARACTERS?!?

P.S. Clearly Jon Snow is the hottest.

Creature Cheeseman

@HunnyBee I felt the same way but then I said them out loud with a British accent, and then I recognized them

Amphora

@HunnyBee Yeah I need a list of names and faces and someone who's read the books to consult during every episode. Cast of goddamn thousands.

Meredith L.

@HunnyBee Read all the books, study the fifty pages of family trees in the back like you're going to be tested on it.

purefog

@HunnyBee
Google Images will sort you out.

HunnyBee

@purefog Ya I understand that I could Google all of these names. I was mainly just remarking at how impressed I am by all the people who recognize these names and can place their corresponding faces without the benefit of Google.

maxine of arc

@HunnyBee Part of my Game of Thrones drinking game is "drink whenever some character you've seen multiple times shows up and you still don't know their freaking name."

Also "drink whenever someone's unrelenting wickedness is illustrated by them being mean to a baby."

EpWs

@Chesh You're gonna have a bad time, yo.

purefog

@HunnyBee
Who says they are not resorting to Google? ;o)

notfromvenus

@HunnyBee I would be sloshed every single Sunday night if I followed that rule, lol.

cinnamonskin

@Creature Cheeseman I watch it with closed captioning on, otherwise I could never figure out wtf is happening.

khaleesi

Random six degrees of separation anecdote, someone I know is heavily involved in the art world and is good friends with Sean Bean's girlfriend who also works in the art world. So my friend has not only met Sean Bean a bunch but also been in a sauna with him and his girlfriend after one particularly long day. I think his exact words were 'Surprisingly good body for a man his age' and I was just like I KNOW RIGHT???!!

Bittersweet

@khaleesi Even we oldsters can manage to stay fairly fit as we crumble into dotage.

 
@serenityfound

@Crumbling Slut Oh god the loop is so great.

Alli525

I have the weirdest soft spot for Viserys Targaryen. But Jon Snow... unf. And Gendry!! Robb and Loras tied for... some place.

Sarah Coe@twitter

@Alli525 Are you Viserys Targaryen's other sister he didn't pay as much "attention" to?

Alli525

@Sarah Coe@twitter yeahhhhhh probably. I have no issue with it.

sophia_h

@Alli525 Fun fact: that guy is a direct descendant of Charles Dickens

mabellegueule

I... have never disagreed with something on The Hairpin as strongly as I do with this list.

I don't even know where to begin.

breccia

THIS IS SO DISTRESSING

jonacon

Game of Thrones? More like Game of Everyone I Wanna Bone, RIGHT LADIES??

-Sorry that this is the best thanks I can give for the magic that is this comments thread.

Valley Girl

@jonacon I've made "more like Peter I-Want-Your-Dick-lage" jokes on every social media platform I have.

K W@twitter

@jonacon Game of Bone(able)s

pterodactgirl

I needed this after the "My Foreign Mom" article and the ensuing comment threads of shame/remorse. Thank you, Edith.

pterodactgirl

That said, Robb Stark is top three material. At least.

jonacon

@pterodactgirl But only while holding direwolf puppies...also why did I start reading the comments in the "My foreign mom" post? WHY? feeeeeelz.

Somewhere my love

@pterodactgirl Thank you! He's my number one and I'm seriously distressed that I seem to be all by my lonesome on this urgent matter.

meetapossum

@pterodactgirl I never liked Robb much in the books, but I like Richard Madden's face a lot.

Gulfie

Also in our fervor have we overlooked the picture that accompanies this list? THAT PICTURE. (And mouse over!)

@serenityfound

@Gulf of Finland The picture is such delightful randomness and the alt-text show that Edith was, in fact, completely aware of what she was doing here.

K W@twitter

@Gulf of Finland Thank you for pointing out that wonderful Easter Egg

whizz_dumb

Now do "Game of Thrones" Women, by Badassed-ness:

1. Daenerys Stormborn Targaryen

Maybe by hotness too.

MilesofMountains

@whizz_dumb
1. Daenerys
2. Brienne, because anyone who beats Jaime with a sword in automatically lifted to the realms of Badass, and because she's the best in the world ever.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@MilesofMountains I concur. Brienne's definitely worth her weight in sapphires.

indiemaiden

@whizz_dumb 2. Arya Stark 3. Margaery Tyrell 4. Brienne of Tarth 5.???

I'm finding it much more difficult to rank the ladies.

indiemaiden

@indiemaiden Margaery is getting major points for manipulating the Idiot King. Brienne is a little too willing to follow strength, as well as having a LOT self-loathing over having a vaj.

@serenityfound

@indiemaiden 5. Cersei (terrible but badass) Then I start to have trouble with all of the other great ladies...

indiemaiden

@@serenityfound Right? Like where do you put Grandma Tyrell? Or Shae? Or Roz?

rosaline

@whizz_dumb
1. Arya
2. Danaerys
3. Brienne
4. Ygritte
5. Cersei
6. Melisandre
7. Olenna Redwyne (Margaery's grandmother, and yes I definitely googled that name)
8. Asha Greyjoy
9. Margaery Tyrell
10. Shae
11. Catelyn Stark
12. Sansa
13. Lysa Arryn

@serenityfound

@indiemaiden I'm an episode behind, but Dany's new friend/slave (whom I'm hoping she'll free...?) seems like a pretty cool lady! Too many hot dudes, too many awesome ladies...

whizz_dumb

@@serenityfound Yeah when she said she'll be taking her I was like, "GOOD CALL SHE'S HOT AND SEAMS RAD" I like where this is going.

meetapossum

@rosaline HOW IS SANSA 12.

@serenityfound

@meetapossum I don't like when people get too on Sansa's case, but, if we're ranking by badassery I'd say she's kind of towards the bottom of the list.

whizz_dumb

@rosaline Arya is definitely badass, but she's still a girl and not a woman, which is even more tough. Category all her own, probably my favorite character. Arya has most potential to be even more badass. It's coming.

@meetpossum Sansa is kind-of a wuss, or at least a timid pushover so far right? She gets flustered but doesn't have a plan of action. @srenityfound whoops, sorry I got on the fictional character's case.

@serenityfound

@whizz_dumb I was more talking about the Tumblr-ers who seem to constantly be talking about how Sansa is the worst of the worst, which seems a little unfair. She's definitely a bit of a pushover so far, although I'm a little amazed she hasn't completely lost it already.

meetapossum

@whizz_dumb @serenityfound

(I have a lot of Sansa Feels)

sophia_h

@rosaline #7 is actually known as the Queen of Thorns (why haven't they used that name yet??) and she is like the 0 or omega of bad-assedness on this list, she is that awesome.

meetapossum

@sophia_h They have. Sansa says to Loras that they call her the Queen of Thorns, and he warns her not to call Olenna that to her face.

rosaline

@meetapossum I concede--Sansa gets WAYYYYY better. This is true. If we think of her as being an undercover operative, she is a total badass. But I rank her low because of her 1st book whining/betrayal/everything. (All this in terms of badassery. I think she's one of the prettiest, if you are thinking about ranking in those terms!)

meetapossum

@rosaline I GUESS. Though I am pretty much against the whole "betrayal" angle because Ned already told Cersei what he was going to do and didn't bother to explain anything to Sansa. But yeah, 11-year-old girls are dumb, and Sansa was pretty dumb.

meetapossum

@rosaline I also don't think you can call her a "wuss" because wtf else is she supposed to do when she's surrounded by enemies?

indiemaiden

@meetapossum I was impressed with how quickly she learned to play the game right after the Stark shit hit the Lannister fan. You could say she really...kept her head! ::cue CSI:Miami theme::

Megasus

@meetapossum SHE'S NOT 12 ON THE SHOW SHE'S 14 NOW I THINK (But Sophie Turner is like 17)

magnowlia

@whizz_dumb Her name's Missandei, in the books she's supposed to be a little girl, and Dany's like a mother figure to her :/

MilesofMountains

@Megasus I think she was 14 when Season 1 started? But there's apparently been a year between Season 2 and Season 3, so I guess she's supposed to be 15-16 now. NOT THAT THAT ISN'T STILL YOUNG

Megasus

@MilesofMountains Pretty sure she says 13 at the feast at Winterfell. I'm too lazy to check. I think it's only been a little over a year so far, show time.

meetapossum

@Megasus I was probably my dumbest at 13, but I still am pretty dumb still even at 27 when it comes to dudes. I just get Sansa!

purefog

@rosaline
The actress who plays Shae (Sibyl Kekilli), besides having been truly great in the Fatih Akin movie "Head On," has done a lot of porn.

Apocalypstick

@purefog And Missandei's been in Hollyoaks.

Apocalypstick

@@serenityfound I kind of love Cersei? Even though she's not as smart as she thinks she is, and selectively sociopathic, and objectively evil, she's trying & scheming & hardcore ruthless & self-sacrificing. She's been dealt a shit hand in life (for a noble) & really works with it.

meetapossum

@Apocalypstick That's my favorite part about ASOIAF. With the exception of one or two characters, they're all pretty well-rounded and sympathetic to a degree. Yes, a lot of them make terrible decisions (purposefully or not), but you can generally understand why they do it, whether or not you agree with it. (You know, like real life!)

Catina Wig

@whizz_dumb cersei! there's a badass who gets shit done.

1- cersei
2- yara
3- margary
4- arya
5- shae

i really hate dany.

iceberg

@whizz_dumb by hotness:
1. Daenerys
2. Her new slave girl
3. Shae
4. Margaery Boleyn, I mean Tyrell
5. Sansa

and then everyone else.

meetapossum

@iceberg A+, bergie. I approve of this list.

I also have a really hard time separating show!canon from book!canon. Like, Shae totally sucks in the books, but she's awesome in the show.

indiemaiden

@whizz_dumb Fun Facts: the actress who plays Shae has done porn.

Catina Wig

@meetapossum i ranked my list from show!canon with a dash of book, i'd have to think really hard to seperate the two.

for instance showpetyr is hot as fuck, but bookpetyr makes me feel icky. also which book/season are we talking? sansa really steps up once she gets a clue, but she is so reactive. it's the same reason i don't like dany. yes - they do some strong things and make some good choices, but it's all reacting to choices and situations.

and bookshae is UGH. show shae is kicking ass and taking names.

ThatWench

@meetapossum @this whole thread:
Yeah, canon-divergence is what makes it so impossible for me to watch the show. The ages of the Starks is definitely the most head-hurting part of it (namely, book!canon vs show!canon vs actors' ages being obviously much older than even the show is trying to tell us), but I worked damn hard to keep all those character names and histories and everything straight while reading those books, I don't need a whole "alternate universe" version messing it all up.

Which also makes it hard to participate in ranking characters' hotness. Ser Loras may have some small character flaws, but clearly we've been told he's the prettiest, right?

meetapossum

@Catina Wig Yeah. I got so bored with Dany in ADWD that I totally forgot how badass she was in ASOS. Meanwhile, my love for Sansa grows and grows.

@ThatWench I can deal with most of the adaptations, and sometimes I prefer them. However,the way they changed Catelyn and Robb's dynamic and Cat in general makes me want to flip tables.

cinnamonskin

@iceberg Margery = Queen Anne forever. <3 with even more cleavage and cooler wardrobe, which I did not think possible.

eiffeldesigns

This goes against the consensus in the comments, but I'm with Edith here. I would rank Jon Snow even lower than he is. But I hate long curly hair. HATE IT.

And here's my top five, because clearly we need another one of these:

1. Khal Drogo
2. Gendry
3. Jaime Lannister
4. Robb Stark (but only sometimes- sometimes his curly hair is too much)
5. Davos

Danzig!

@Kirs yeah well I hate YOU, have you ever thought of that?

(I don't hate you but my hair is best when it's long)

Catina Wig

@Kirs curly haired is gorgeous, i mean hello - LOTR cast!

hobbitsess

eiffeldesigns

@Danzig! Sorry! I have no idea why I have such a visceral reaction to dudes with curly hair. It's just always been that way. I'm curlist. :-(

cinnamonskin

@Kirs THIS YES CURLS WHY

ALSO DROGO

Danzig!

@cinnamonskin haters all around me

cinnamonskin

@Kirs my hair is also long and curly. Maybe I just don't want anyone to steal my products.

STILL DROGO

indiemaiden

Okay we're doing this? Let's do this. I'm doing this in order of boneability, which may or may not require pillow-talk afterwards. I do not find moral bankruptcy to be a *total* lady-boner-killer.

Also, after the reception the whores gave him, who is not ranking Podrick first? I am 110% curious about this boy's skillz.

28. Joffrey Baratheon
27. Varys
26. Hodor
25. Robert Baratheon
24. Viserys Targaryen
23. Lead White Walker
22. Samwell Tarly
21. The Black Smoke
20. Tywin Lannister
19. Sandor 'The Hound' Clegane
18. Ser Davos Seaworth
17. Jojen Reed
16. Renly Baratheon
15. Loras Tyrell
14. Jon Snow
13. Ser Jorah Mormont
12. Theon Greyjoy
11. Stannis Baratheon
10. Eddard 'Ned' Stark
9. Bronn
8. Tyrion Lannister
7. Jaqen H'ghar
6. Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish
5. Khal Drogo
4. Robb Stark
3. Jaime Lannister
2. Gendry
1. Podrick

indiemaiden

@indiemaiden You know what, I'm rethinking Viserys. He's been gone a while so the horror that is his whole self had faded, but now that I've thought about it some I'm bumping him down to the end of the list. Fuck that guy. Or rather, don't.

packedsuitcase

@indiemaiden Okay, but after that article earlier this week, I kind of like the "Tyrion is testing Podrick's loyalty" theory instead of the "Podrick is a god in bed" theory solely on the basis of the fact that I have had sex with a male virgin and it was...awkward. Horribly, horribly awkward. And I was a virgin, too. So I can only imagine how little a woman whose job it was to sleep with people would enjoy it.

indiemaiden

@packedsuitcase But Roz corroborated!

packedsuitcase

@indiemaiden Yes, but with no details! Think about the last time you had a really, really, incredibly good lay. Aren't there specific things you can remember about it? Angles, positions, nifty little things your partner did with their tongue? Couldn't you at least come up with some adjectives? Patient, focused, etc?

I personally like the theory that Tyrion paid the women to sleep with Podrick and then give Podrick his money back. So they still got paid, and Tyrion gets to see if Podrick can be trusted - he knows he's supposed to get the money back, but does Podrick get it? Like he said, getting Littlefinger's position did not mean getting his spies, and Tyrion has to make his own network.

This also fits in nicely with my "Tyrion is the most interesting, resiliant character in the show" theory, so there's that.

Valley Girl

This is the kind of listicle I can get behind. Or underneath, or on top of, etc...

Thank you for ranking The Hound so highly and making me feel less alone in the universe. I've just finished S1 and haven't seen the Black Smoke yet so both me and Google Image Search are picturing the Smoke Monster from LOST. My top 10:

Renly Baratheon
Sandor 'The Hound' Clegane
Bronn
Ser Jorah Mormont
Gendry
Khal Drogo
Jon Snow
Jaime Lannister
Tyrion Lannister
Tyrion Lannister
Tyrion Lannister
Eddard 'Ned' Stark

@serenityfound

@Valley Girl Tyyyyrrrion

meetapossum

RIP Renly. Your crown was always the coolest.

Alli525

ALSO YOU GUYS. Burn Gorman is on the show now!! As a member of the Night's Watch, except he just stabbed someone pretty important so somehow I doubt he'll be alive for much longer. But BURN GORMAN. His little slash of a mouth... hmmmmmmmm

anachronistique

@Alli525 I saw him and CRACKED THE FUCK UP, because Burn is like the go-to guy for shifty assholes. (See also his role in The Dark Knight Rises.) Bless.

Alli525

@anachronistique Yeah and he was a TINY bit asshole-y in Torchwood... or at least self-absorbed... and at least until his big "change" in the middle of the show.

konata

Filthy lies, Jojen Reed is near the top. I have had a(n age appropriate) crush on Thomas Sangster since Love Actually.

Also: Bronn.

indiemaiden

@konata I just looked it up and he's 22! I thought he was, like, 14!

lovelettersinhell

@indiemaiden The actor may be 22, but Jojen is a CHILD! *grouses*

meetapossum

@lovelettersinhell A smarmy child.

You'll be sorry Jo March

@konata I'm with you. Jojen is supa hot. And close to my age. I luff him. <3

Catina Wig

@konata when chronicles of narnia prince caspian came out i am shamefully attracted to edmund. because DAMN. also - shane from weeds, starting like season 2 (runs and hides)

frigwiggin

Can I have a tiny club of people who haven't seen this show? Let's talk about the weather or something.

@serenityfound

@frigwiggin WINTER IS COMING.

frigwiggin

@@serenityfound Well, I walked right into that one.

alannaofdoom

@frigwiggin @serenityfound I LOVE YOU BOTH FOR THIS. SO MUCH.

daisicles

@frigwiggin I'm totally going to jump in and ruin the fun by saying that I haven't seen it either. My Tivo keeps recording episodes, all 'hey, I got this for you, why aren't you watching it like everyone else?'. And I can't bring myself to thumb it down because maybe one day I'll appreciate my Tivo's diligence. But in the meantime, I have friends who've been sharing their cast sightings for a couple years now and I'm jealous as all get out. 'Oh, we went out for dinner the other day and Peter Dinklage was at the next table and he had the same off-menu salad as me'. Bastards.

Diana

@@serenityfound

I think this is the most marvelously set up punchline in the history of the Hairpin. Beautifully done.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@@serenityfound Oh man, I want to clap at my desk.

Blushingflwr

@frigwiggin Every time someone talks about Stark I think they mean Tony Stark and I get confused.

Megasus

So sad to see so many curly haired men haters out there. OH WELL MORE FOR ME.

Danzig!

@Megasus you're missing out, ladies

meetapossum

@Megasus Whaaaaaaaaaat. I must have just skipped right over those comments.

Chareth Cutestory

@Megasus Curly hair is one of my biggest turn-ons! :(

Crumbling Slut

Whenever I look at this it just makes me want Tyrion more and more. Not even sexually just to high five him at least.

Rose_H_Tyler

@Crumbling Slut Best GIF ever!

Crumbling Slut

@Rose_H_Tyler Also this makes me laugh endlessly.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYNeT2nzEgA

laurel

I was at DMV renewing my license (which required getting an eight-years-older picture taken) this afternoon. I came home to find this post.

:)

Miss Maszkerádi

Well clearly I really need to finally start watching Game of fucking Thrones.

purefog

@Miss Maszkerádi
Read the books first. Srsly.

honey cowl

Are these real character names? What?

Valley Girl

@honey cowl I just finished the first season last night and posted on FB that it's cheesier and cornier than cheddar popcorn and I love that, and I got a pair of dudes who never respond to anything chiming in to defend against the allegation. They're watching a show where actors dress up in suits of armor, fight dragons and have names like Greyjoy and Littlefinger, and they can't admit that it's the littlest bit cheesy? Come on, now!

elizabeast

@Valley Girl There are friends that will be forever mad at me for comparing story lines in GoT to Vampire Diaries.

But joke's on them for dismissing Vampire Diaries as the tv version of Twilight.

martinipie

@elizabeast no one should ever dismiss TVD!!

slanket

@elizabeast Please elaborate on the storylines. I love both shows.

Sidenote: Crossover episode. Damon has hatesexx with Cersei. Stefan the Ripper is pillaging villages in the Riverlands. Klaus is in the north looking for a magic horn to make whitewalker/werewolf/vampire tribrids. Elijah works with Varys for the good of the realm (and to redeem Klaus somehow). Caroline plans a 72 course wedding with halfassed help from Bonnie and Elena.

meetapossum

I do think we need some more Loras love.

Nutellaface

@meetapossum Whenever anyone says Ser Loras, I think of Slow Loris, so I really can't take him seriously. Also, I picture him holding tiny umbrellas above his head.

blurg

@meetapossum Finn Jones is a beautiful and precious snowflake and deserves to be treated as such.

I'm trying to find the best picture of him being ridiculous... and I can't because ALL OF THE PICTURES OF HIM BEING RIDICULOUS ARE THE BEST ONES.

meetapossum

@blurg Finn Jones is a treasure.

sam
sam

@meetapossum Oh thank god, I was beginning to think I was the only one making the slow loris/Ser Loras connection. EVERY TIME, all I can think is tiny umbrella. Also, is he the same guy who was banging Joffrey's mom/got blackmailed by Tyrion? I have almost as hard a time distinguishing the people on this show as I did distinguishing the parade of short men in dark coats in Boardwalk Empire.

notfromvenus

@sam No, he's the guy that was banging Renly Baratheon. Margery's brother.

The guy sleeping with Cersei was L-something else, but he was her cousin and blonde.

lovelettersinhell

EDITH Jojen Reed is like 12!!!

Also, if I were single, I'd want to go guy-hunting with you, because we clearly have way different taste in men. All the really old and too young dudes for you, all the Gendrys for me!

mecmec

so i'm the only one who's into Theon's traditional British ugly-hot thing, then?

indiemaiden

@mecmec I'm with you. I dig crooked teeth and pretty eyes.

meetapossum

@mecmec I'm attracted to Alfie Allen when he's Theon, but not in real life. He always needs scruff, dirt, and leather.

meetapossum

@mecmec For good measure

indiemaiden

@meetapossum Have you seen him as a blond? It just feels...wrong.

Mila

@mecmec I am with you on the Theon thing. I am almost mad they make his character so deeply awful, because give me something to make my attraction to him not gross.

MilesofMountains

@mecmec I can't unsee the little cartoon Alfie from his sister's video.

Chareth Cutestory

@mecmec I have, like, a secret/shameful/occasional attraction to him. I don't even know why.

redheaded&crazy

@Chareth Cutestory yeah I'd tap dat

Catina Wig

@mecmec theon is a boil. and prolly has crabs.

indiemaiden

@Catina Wig He definitely has crabs. But crabs are curable.

Olivia2.0

@meetapossum WHOA - is that....Lily Allen's brother? I could clearly google this myself but...WHAT?

indiemaiden

@Olivia2.0 Yeah! She wrote a song about him! About how all he did was smoke weed and wank. I bet he drew on those experiences for his character.

Olivia2.0

@indiemaiden Oh god I remember the song! Hilarious!

Hot Doom

@indiemaiden I didn't know Theon could get any more appealing, but now this tableau just sent me. ::barfs to self in corner::

Allie J

@indiemaiden
I was watching Elizabeth last week (the one with Cate Blanchett) and they showed this little boy (the one whose parents were hiding in the wall with the priest--played by Daniel Craig! Wow this thought is meandering.), and I thought, "That kid looks so familiar. He looks like a very young, very blond, chubby Theon Greyjoy." And that's exactly what he was. Freaked me out something fierce.

You'll be sorry Jo March

<3 u Edith, and to each their own, but here's my top ten:
1. Jaime Lannister
2. Tyrion Lannister
3. Jojen Reed
4. Jaqen H'ghar
5. Gendry
6. Ser Jorah Mormont
7. Loras Tyrell
8. Renly Baratheon
9. Jon Snow
10. Tywin Lannister
I think part of my attraction to Jojen Reed is that he looks like a hot andro girl?

purefog

@You'll be sorry Jo March
Speaking of Jaime Lannister, did ANYONE watch "New Amsterdam" when it was on? Or are you the demographic that doomed it to non-renewal? Curse you!

You'll be sorry Jo March

@purefog Curse away! Alas, I never saw it. But now that I've read the description I may rectify that...

@serenityfound

@You'll be sorry Jo March I LOVED NEW AMSTERDAM

cosmia

FOR REAL THOUGH, OUT OF CHARACTER VISERYS IS KIND OF BEAUTIFUL:

indiemaiden

@cosmia Oh shit.

knockout

@cosmia Wait, what? How?

Megasus

@cosmia I would hit that so hard he'd get whiplash.

martinipie

@cosmia hnnnngggggg

Rose_H_Tyler

@cosmia oh my goodness!

Apocalypstick

@cosmia It's like suddenly accidently looking into the sun when you expected cloud cover.

Catina Wig

@cosmia i love his sad face.

Mila

I am really surprised that so many ladies love Jorah. There is something about his character that just, ick. I don't dig him.

Megasus

@Mila IT'S LIKE 80% THE VOICE.

MilesofMountains

@Mila I hate book-Jorah but I kind of love show-Jorah somehow. I will blame the voice as well!

Chareth Cutestory

@Mila I'm equally surprised at all the Littlefinger love. I hatehatehate him and he creeps me the fuck out.

Catina Wig

@Mila i dig bad guys and i don't like him. he's beautiful, his voice is melodious, but it's like he's goes beyond the threat of mean sex and into the realm of scary.

iceberg

@Mila his character is a sad old loser, but loks wise he's that craggy-sexy guy that's just a LITTLE bit too old for you and hmmmmmmm.

Mila

@MilesofMountains Yeah, I can't really separate my feelings about the book character from the show character. I find him a mix of pathetic, failing to take responsibility for his mistakes, annoyingly obsequious, and at the same time not knowing his place and being too pushy. He feels kind of like a stereotypical Nice Guy to me.
ETA I guess he does have a nice voice, I give him that. But to my ears it just comes off as patronizing and suck-up-y at the same time. God, I can't stand him.

Nancy Sin

@Chareth Cutestory He is so squirrely!

slanket

@iceberg But I bet the sad old loser would try really hard to please the lady he was boning...

samafaye

Alright, I just finished reading every single comment in this thread and have never had so much to say about one topic in my liiiffeeeee.

Chareth Cutestory

@samafaye I know, I don't even know where to start!

Rose_H_Tyler

@Chareth Cutestory just replying to say I love your name!

Chareth Cutestory

@Rose_H_Tyler Aww, thanks! :) AD cannot come back soon enough.

Diana

EDITH IS A MONSTER. I don't even know how to arrange my thoughts about this, I don't even know if I can do a ranked list. I want a series of bullet points explaining the various facets and degrees of hotness present on this show. I need like, weighted rankings in various categories. But here is my top five anyway:

1) Gendry can fucking get it and then build me a commemorative metal sculpture so I can cherish the memory afterwards.
2) Ja'quen can get it, then morph into a whole series of hot-ass assassins, all of whom can also get it.
3) Littlefinger is patient, devious, and has probably seen some SHIT in those brothels.
4) The Hound, because god knows I love the miserable sarcastic assholes of this world.
5) Viserys, and I would hate myself afterwards, but not THAT much.

purefog

@Diana
(strokes beard) Zees ees a VARRRYYY een-teresting leest.

Catina Wig

@Diana GENDRYYYYYY

pinniped

@Diana HOUNDDDD

[sic]

@Diana Everyone who loves the Hound needs to watch The Book Group. Just... go torrent it right now.

pinniped

@[sic] I saw it on Netflix! And thus I love that actor, but also the book-version Hound is so tough-guy-exterior, secretly-sensitive-wounded-interior that I just want to give him a hug.

MrsTeacherFace

I know that he's not all there, but how is it possible for all of the horrible people to be on the list and yet no one thought to add Hodor? I do not find him attractive, but I'd sleep with him over Joffrey if someone made me choose.

Also:
1. Tyrion Lannister (because is the smartest and most awesome)
2. Robb Stark
3. Jaime Lannister
4. Jon Snow
5. Gendry

indiemaiden

@MrsTeacherFace Hodor is on my list above Joffery, Viserys, and Varys. Cuz srsly.

Olivia2.0

@MrsTeacherFace My cowowker put a note on my desk that just said this:
"Hodor"
- Hodor

It made me laugh so hard. And, now, my reply to this comment is simply...Hodor.

Rose_H_Tyler

Ooh ooh I want to do this too!
My top picks in no particular order:
- Jaqen
- Gendry
- Jaime
- Tyrion
- Jorah
- Viserys sort of! Yes! I know he's awful. But also pretty. I agree with @Diana.

This is mostly based on the TV show. I read the books first and based on that it would never have crossed my mind that Jaqen would be hot. When I first saw him on screen it was a WONDERFUL surprise. On the other hand I got a bit of a crush on the Hound in the books but the dude on screen, while a fine actor, just doesn't do it for me.

Thanks Edith for posting this - it's so fun to read everyone's opinions!

Valley Girl

There are some more funny reactions to this controversy if you search twitter. Next time let's cross reference this list with a craggy-to-babyface scale.

indiemaiden

@Valley Girl Yeah, I found it pretty difficult to compare, say, Jon Snow and Ser Jorah Mormont. One is attractive to the remnants of my adolescent self and the other is attractive to the MILF of my future.

slanket

@indiemaiden Those are the truest words I've ever read and the best explanation of why I'm so attracted to both. They're totally different, but at the same time, they are both angsty, stupid, loyal, and hott.

Graydon Gordian

Wow. I thought my fellas and I had a lot to say about the ladies on Game of Thrones, but I'm not sure we could approach anywhere near this level of depth or intensity.

iceberg

@Graydon Gordian Objectification: it's cute when we do it.

paper bag princess

Obviously Viserys is horrid, but he is also beautiful, and I would climb him like a damn tree.

WinteronMars

Where is Tyrion??? Omg Peter Dinklage is the sexiest man on Game of Thrones!

par_parenthese

@WinteronMars I have many possibly-inappropriate feelings about Peter Dinklage. He is a genius, genius actor and both wicked hot and wicked funny. I mean hello: The Station Agent. In Bruges. Death at a Funeral. Basically if he is in a thing, I will watch that thing.

Escapade Dunfree

@par_parenthese Not In Bruges! That's a different dude. But I share your Peter Dinklage maybe-wrong love, but how can it be wrong if it feels so right?

Catina Wig

top 5
1- petyr
2- the hound
3- post hand loss jamie
4- viserys
5- rob (but only after he's gone to war)

pinniped

@Catina Wig Love it. Jaime gained 1000 hotness points after he become all pensive / hand-less.

hungrybee

Barristan Selmy brings some silver fox hotness. Anybody else think so?

A. Louise

@katiemcgillicuddy @Crumbling Slut for some reason it won't let me reply to your Simon/Alicia gif-fest but I just wanted to say

THANK YOU

Also possibly best Hairpin thread of all time.

meetapossum

@A. Louise Man, look how cool his crown is.

Crumbling Slut

@A. Louise @katiemcgillicuddy LOVE that GIF!
It also wouldn't let me reply to our thread of Simon/Alisha or else I would've kept the gifs going.
Can't handle all the filth running through our minds.

This is my new username

@Crumbling Slut What show are those gifs from? I need to know. For reasons...

Crumbling Slut

@This is my new username From the show misfits. Really good from Season 1-3 than the writing got shitty and it crumbled. I would recommend those seasons though.

Slapfight

This list has made me realize that I find incestuous dudes way hotter than dudes who kill wolves.
I'm on the Gendry train. Then Jaime. Golden hand or no.

vernon hardapple

@Slapfight Wait Gendry gets incestuous??!! I'm behind on season 3 so this is confusing as all get out.

Slapfight

@vernon hardapple Oh no. I meant that I find the incesty dudes (Jaime, Viserys) a lot more attractive than the wolf killers (Joffrey, Robert). Seriously. Screw you Robert Baratheon! I'll never forgive you for Lady! NEVER!

fondue with cheddar

OMG YOU GUYS I FINALLY STARTED WATCHING GAME OF THRONES LAST NIGHT AND I'M SO EXCITED TO WATCH MORE!

Seriously, it's a wonder I ever got to bed.

meetapossum

@fondue with cheddar Yesssssssssssssssssss. Join us.

Slapfight

@fondue with cheddar I'm so excited for youuuuuuu!

A. Louise

@fondue with cheddar YESSSSS I'd also highly recommend reading the books, they fill in so many delicious GoT details. Albeit with less shirtless gifs. GRRM, can you gif the next book?

meetapossum

@fondue with cheddar Sometimes I think about stopping people from watching/reading before their heart gets smashed into a million pieces, but I never do because I want them to share in my misery.

fondue with cheddar

@meetapossum Oh, I'm so there! I heard about the show before it came out and I thought it sounded great but I didn't have HBO. Then after it started I heard my coworkers talk about how awesome it was and I got really jealous and sad. Then I got HBO but was too far behind to catch up and too poor to buy the DVDs. But then I discovered that my local library has all the HBO and Showtime series on DVD, so I got on the waiting list for GoT and finally got it last night! We only had time for one episode last night, but I expect we will be watching it all weekend. I'M SO STOKED.

My boyfriend is not too familiar with the fantasy genre, so he keeps making comments like, "That looks like the wagons in Skyrim!" or "That looks like the forest in Harry Potter!" and I'm like, "It looks like a lot of things, just shut up and watch!" Or he points out anachronisms or styles of architecture that seem out of place and I'm like, "It's a fantasy world! Forget everything you know about history and just shut up and watch!" Lovingly, of course. ;)

Megasus

@fondue with cheddar Yeah they absolutely did all that culture mixing on purpose!

Alli525

@meetapossum The episode where Everyone I Love Dies is coming up probably not too far in the future... not looking forward to it. I had almost forgotten about it until my roommate reminded me. Sigh.

meetapossum

@Alli525 I am oddly looking forward to it? The series has pretty much made me disassociate completely, and I have to laugh to keep from crying. See this sequence that I screencapped from the AV Club and I still find hilarious every time. ***DO NOT CLICK THE LINK IF YOU DON'T WANT SPOILERS FOR ASOS AND THE THIRD SEASON OF GOT, EVERYONE ELSE***

A. Louise

@Alli525 I threw my book and left it on the floor for 3 days, scowling at it, after I read certain parts that may or may not happen in this season. ALL OF THE FEELS.

That being said I am SO looking forward to the next episode for SPOILER SPOILER Kissed By Fire SPOILER

Alli525

@meetapossum NO NO NO!
@A. Louise YES YES YES! (the trailer... eep!!)

A. Louise

@Alli525 my boyfriend was really uncomfortable by how much I salivated over that half second clip... a girl needs a cave fantasy ok

fondue with cheddar

We watched the first two seasons in their entirety in about 36 hours. And now I'm sad because I want to start on season three!

meetapossum

@fondue with cheddar Google project free tv. You can thank me after you've watched the last 5 episodes.

A. Louise

@fondue with cheddar Sidereel is also a great site for this sort of thing.

fondue with cheddar

@meetapossum @A. Louise COOOL! I tried a bunch of free download sites in the past but they all sucked. Thanks so much!

A. Louise

@fondue with cheddar also what do you think so far?! I love newcomers' reactions to GoT since I feel like I've simmered over every plot and theory in utter nerdiness for so long.

Megasus

@A. Louise Oh man, should we ask The Question? The one question that divides all ASoIaF fans?

fondue with cheddar

@A. Louise I love it! Marathon-watching isn't quite the same because you don't have a week between episodes to think about what just happened and wonder about what happened next, but it's freaking awesome.

A. Louise

@Megasus oh gosh, which question!? Because the whole thing is such a mess that I feel like EVERY question divides ASoIaF fans... which is why it's so brilliant... ask ask!

Megasus

@A. Louise Who do you think Jon Snow's mother is?

Megasus

@A. Louise Who do you think Jon Snow's mother is?

meetapossum

@Megasus Wait, does that divide people? I thought like, 95% of the fandom was on board with the usual theory.

Megasus

@meetapossum I dunno, I am one of the 5% who is not on board with that theory.

Alli525

@Megasus Can we clarify? "That theory" meaning that [Jon's mother] ran away with [Jon's father], and he's actually a legitimate son?

A. Louise

@Alli525 a Wiki of Ice and Fire covers the main theory well.. I'm assuming we're all talking about this? Jon Snow Theories

meetapossum

@A. Louise I feel like the answer is one of those obvious things (apparently D&D were approved by GRRM when he asked them who they thought Jon's mother is). However, the problem with Westeros is that there are no paternity tests! See also: another character who makes his first appearance in ADWD.

fondue with cheddar

Would you mind making a new thread to talk about who Jon Snow's mother might be? I don't want any spoilers and it's hard to ignore the comments as they show up in my email.

MisterHippity

Glad to finally see "Ned" at the top of one of these lists. It CAN be a sexy name!

km1312

@MisterHippity Agreed. My hot boyfriend is named Ned, AND (unrelatedly!) Ned Stark deserves his place on this list. Sorry, haters.

km1312

Edith, thank you so much for having the courage to speak truth to power and placing Ned Stark is his rightful #1 spot.

hungrybee

@km1312 Winter (Boyfriend) Is Coming

Nocs

Bronn. Bronnnnn!

Also, this is a safe space, so: Jorah makes my lady parts feel things.

Also also, my officemate is out sick so I am alone in my office and this thread is the BEST way to spend my morning.

Mila

@Nocs I am with you on Bronn, totally against you on Jorah.

slanket

@Nocs Hells yes to Jorah. I don't really understand it, how Sir Richard Carlisle makes my knees wobbly, but he's definitely in my bone list.

angelan

@Nocs UK pinners - how long did it take you to realise than Bronn is played by Jerome Flynn of 'Robson and Jerome' Unchained Melody cash in cover fame? I didn't even notice!

omgkitties

I don't think I need to convince anyone here but damn this show is POTENT. I've only seen the first episode (just started watching, whee!) and within a day I texted a guy I used to date simply because he reminds me of Khal Drogo. (Right? You'd text him, too.)

Somewhere my love

@omgkitties DOES HE HAVE A BROTHER??

happymisanthrope

Am I the only one who watches this for Ser Jorah Mormont?

@serenityfound

@happymisanthrope Nope. Give me the stoic, weathered men of action.

Hot Doom

@happymisanthrope He will always and forever be Sir Carlisle to me, from Downton Abbey, the dirty (hot) muckraker.

Pseudo Pseudonym

@Hot Doom Some how I like him better this way? Like Lady Mary dumped him and then he went wandering in the desert? I think Jorah said he sold salves to pay for his wife's expensive tastes so this totally works in my brain.

Inspector Tiger

my personal hotness-list has completely transformed after all the gifs and serious hotness-discussion. (Especially the Richard Madden one. mmmh....)

Ohh, what wonderful stuff to spend my thinking on!

Nancy Sin

Renly Baratheon. Can. Get It. He can turn me around and pretend I'm a boy. Too much?

5. Jamie Lannister
4. Jon Snow
3. Ned Stark
2. Robb Stark
1. Renly Sexysmile Baratheon

Nancy Sin

@Nancy Sin Oh crap. Forgot Khal Drago. Eh, just take Ned out of there.

Julia duMais

@Nancy Sin I will be more than happy to take Ned off your hands.

Bootsandcats

Rhakharo is the only dude under the age of 45 who I would consider. Rhakharo forever!

Rose_H_Tyler

@Bootsandcats yes, Rakharo is hot. It is known!

Megasus

@Rose_H_Tyler Rakharo is seriously so hot (and also in a couple of episodes of the first season of The Borgias, and still hot). I was pretty upset when he was [redacted], I really wanted him and Dany to bone.

meetapossum

Concerning all the men of Game of Thrones:

tiemposbuenos

This is the perfect internet listicle bait.

48. Robin Arryn
47. Walder Frey
46. Joffrey Baratheon
45. Balon Greyjoy
44. Hot Pie
43. Samwell Tarly
42. Robert Baratheon
41. Grand Maester Pycelle
40. Pyat Pree
39. Lancel Lannister
38. Janos Slynt
37. Hodor
36. Mance Rayder
35. Varys
34. Viserys Targaryen
33. Rickon Stark
32. Tyrion Lannister
31. Craster
30. Tywin Lannister
29. Benjen Stark
28. Thoros of Myr
27. Jojen Reed
26. Yoren
25. Sandor Clegane
24. Roose Bolton
23. Salladhor Saan
22. Beric Dondarrion
21. Davos Seaworth
20. Barristan Selmy
19. Littlefinger
18. Podrick Payne
17. Eddard Stark
16. Stannis Baratheon
15. Theon Greyjoy
14. Bran Stark
13. Tormund
12. Jaqen H'ghar
11. Ramsay Snow
10. Melisandre's smoke monster
9. Jorah Mormont
8. Renly Baratheon
7. Gendry
6. Edmure Tully
5. Robb Stark
4. Jon Snow
3. Loras Tyrell
2. Jamie Lannister
1. Khal Drogo & Khaleesi's blood of her blood crew

ponymalta

@tiemposbuenos Edmure Tully? THE MOST USELESS TULLY OF ALL?

Rose_H_Tyler

@tiemposbuenos re: Lancel, the actor's kind of cute in House of Anubis, which is this awesome supernatural/horror/comedy/boarding school show on Nick. But on GoT ugh ick! The haircut and hat don't help, for sure. #39 is the right spot.

Princess Slaya

BETWEEN THIS THREAD AND THE GOOD BOYFRIEND BAD BOYFRIEND THREAD TODAY THE HAIRPIN HAS WON THE INTERNET TODAY.

Fluff

I just want to be squished in between Jaime and Brienne while they make out passionately and insult each other. That's all I want in this world.

rimy

I missed this the first time and gifs don't work at my office (gif blocker? idk) so came back for no reason other than just to ogle them. I may have a problem.

Mitch Edgeworth@twitter

Season 1 Jaime Lannister is middle of the list. Season 3 Jaime Lannister, with that beard, skyrockets straight into first place AND MY HEART WHATTUP

Mitch Edgeworth@twitter

Oh, and while he's not hot per se, Stannis makes balding look good. I stand by that.

nolite_te_bastardes

I strongly disagree with this list. Winners are Jon Snow, Tyrion, Renly, Loras, Stannis, and sometimes Robb.

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titsgrande

watch 'Gay of Thrones' on Funny or Die. Best updates/commentary of GoT ever!! hilarious!!

tropical acorn

1 - Kingslayer (did google search. oh! god! specially with normal hair)
2 - Drogo (obvious reasons)
3 - Jorah (can't really say why... he just seems he could do stuff to me that the other guys wouldn't even imagine)

The rest are ok, but somehow too old or too boyish and I'm a men-that-look-like-men kind of girl :)

Oh! and Viserys (the actor, not the blonde haired) kind of looks like a Fassbender's younger brother. I absolutely love Fassbender. I'm just mesmerised by him.

chickfixa

Scrolled to bottom, ignoring all others, YES! Sean Bean FOREVER!

Allie J

Where is Uncle Benjen? Surely I am not alone?

tropical acorn

@Allie J No, no! you're not alone!

meetapossum

@Allie J
Great nose, cool scar!

Hot Doom

Last night, I tipsily got into bed and started groping all up on my poor husband who was trying to sleep, and he told me "agggghhhgh you're like the Black Smoke". I was both flattered and insulted, but I do plan to keep this act up.

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