Friday, March 22, 2013


Telling Tegan and Sara Apart

Tegan is the one who always gets you a gift for holidays when you didn't think you were exchanging gifts.

Sara is the one who buys colored glass bottles at yard sales.

Tegan is the one who told you about The Gallery of Regrettable Food.

Sara is the one who has been making the same scarf for three years, and it's much wider at the top.

Tegan is the one who if the two of you were staying in a hotel together and you realized there was something wrong with the room but didn't really want to make a big deal out of it with the staff, because you're not that kind of person, she'd go down and get the room switched but in such a way that didn't put anyone out or make anybody uncomfortable.

Sara is the one who digs at her cuticles but has perfect short-clipped nails, filed to be square-ish.

...let's agree they both have short nails.

Tegan is the one who would know the non-emergency line for the police in your area so that if you saw an old man walking around the neighborhood looking lost and confused and couldn't answer any of your questions, she'd be able to summon help without tying up the 911 lines.

Sara is the one who always knows exactly which episode of Golden Girls you are thinking of, and who the guest star was.

Tegan is the one who correctly guesses the murderer like, four minutes into a mystery, even if she hasn't seen it before. Not just the easy ones, like Law & Order. Poirot and Foyle's War too.

Sara is the one who's always up for being dragged to those small local military history museums when you're on vacation, even when it's just a cannon in a field with an illegible plaque next to it.

Tegan is the one who has a flashlight and jumper cables in her car. You keep saying you'll get to it ("I know, I know, I should really get one, I know I'll need something like that eventually") until one day you open your trunk and find that she's quietly placed an emergency kit there for you.

Sara is the one who stole a restaurant chalkboard for you after the owner asked the two of you to stop making out.

Tegan is the one who orders coffee-table art books she'll never read or even open most of the time. Your apartment together is covered in precariously balanced book piles, half of which are still in their Amazon boxes. "What do you need all this for," you ask her, half exasperated, half laughing. "I know," she says smiling. "I knoooow."

Sara is the one who has a godmother who has given her a blank journal and a horse calendar every Christmas since she was six. She always messes up and tears out blank pages and then tosses them, but genuinely appreciates the gesture all the same.

43 Comments / Post A Comment

fondue with cheddar

This is great. Love the tags.

maybe partying will help

Oh MELIS, you always know just what I need to read on a snowy bad Friday.

maybe partying will help

@maybe partying will help

uhh and Nicole too, somehow I only saw Mallory's name (I guess it was the tag). I LOVE YOU TOO NICOLE

Nicole Cliffe

(stops crying, smiles cheerfully)


@Nicole Cliffe Just get Melis to move into your house and then we can have this EVERY DAY!


Brilliant. I'm like a .5 on the Kinsey scale, but given the opportunity I would date either one of them.

Also, I'm happy to see the results of our Pin leaders hanging out IRL (in addition to the empty wine bottles and craft projects gone horribly and hilariously wrong that I also imagine are created). Jolie and Edith, I have it on good authority* that you two hung out recently--I expect to see an equally dazzling post as a result!

*comment by Jolie on The Awl


I cannot decide which I would be better friends with. I like that Sara is always up for visiting tiny military history museums and knows her Golden Girls, but I kind of abhor theft, even if that restaurant owner was a real dick and kind of deserved it. I like that Tegan is always prepared with jumper cables and a flashlight—I think that's awesome—but I usually find the kind of people who complain about hotel rooms and things like that to be too intense for me.

Hmm. Hmmmmmmm.


@Emby No, no, no, YOU were the one who complained about hotel rooms, and Tegan silently and totally not intensely fixed it for you.

I liked the military museum thing too, but Tegan has my heart.

Roxanne Rholes

@Emby Depending on the problem, I am pro-complaining. Well, not pro-complaining, more like pro-attempt-to-resolve-the-issue. I mean, if you don't like the way the toilet paper is rolled, that's your own thing to fix, but if the bedside clock doesn't work or the TV remote is broken or there are no towels or something, that's just getting what you've paid for, and as long as you're nice about it, that's what hotel staff is for.


@Emby I'm happy with anyone who wants to go look at a plaque next to a cannon. Let's drive around central Jersey and look for Revolutionary War battlefields!


@Amphora Taking day trips to weird places is my very favorite thing. A friend of mine and I took a day trip to Centralia, PA, which was badass (underground coal fire burning for the past 40 years; population about 99% gone but a couple weirdos left; smoke rising up from cracks in the ground and the freeway warped into a hellish jag).

And we took another trip to the final resting place of Stonewall Jackson's arm. Not Stonewall Jackson himself, but a separate burial site for his arm.


@Emby not the point, but my geology class in college took a field trip to Centralia too, and it was *gnarly*. Seriously grim and very, very depressing.


Do twins have separate godmothers? I have never thought about this before.

fondue with cheddar

@gobblegirl I'd never thought about it either. I guess it's cool to have separate ones, as twins are so often lumped together. I wonder which is common practice?


@gobblegirl well, my twin and I have separate godmothers. I don't know if that's usually the case, though!


@gobblegirl My twin sisters do. Also separate godfathers.


@gobblegirl I thought that raised an interesting question, too, I'm glad some twins and twin-knowers shared their insight!

I always thought you just told them apart by "who has the labret piercing" which has always made me wonder if Tegan really wishes she could just not have that piercing any more. But maybe she keeps it because she likes it, NOT just so people can tell them apart, I don't know! It's a very pressing issue on my mind. Also, they have very different personalities (based on watching way too many of their Myspace videos at one time (they were very funny.)


@shantasybaby Here is a thing I have noticed: I think Sara has a mole on her face in exactly the place where one would have a labret piercing (see GIF below). And from consuming a huge amount of Tegan/Sara media, Tegan comes off (or used to come off) as the twin who was more co-dependent while Sara seemed to want more distance. So my personal theory is that Tegan totally got the labret piercing to be more like Sara.

[Is it wrong that I spend time thinking about these things?]


"...after the owner asked the two of you to stop making out."

If only. *sigh*

fondue with cheddar

@Megan@twitter Also "Your apartment together..."


Apparently, Tegan is my personality doppelganger.


@minijen I'm already married but maybe you should marry me anyway.


@SarahP - I shocked a repairman yesterday when he bemoaned his lack of a flashlight, and I whipped my MiniMaglite out of my purse.

Antonius Block

@minijen I think that makes me YOUR personality doppelganger. Hello!



seriously this was perfect. I will take one of each, please and thank you.


Coloured glass bottles are the best. I have a pair on my desk right now that a neighbour left outside his house a few weeks ago, along with some Simon Schama audiobooks and a toy plush dog.


Oh man, all of a sudden I am in a time machine back to 2009 when I had a shitty job that summer and watched endless T & S videos, and when I came home from work I would curl up in my (actual, literal) closet and listen to "Nineteen" while being nineteen, and cry.

But this is actually perfect.

Anne Wachtel@twitter

My 1 year old niece is named Tegan. My brother and sister-in-law had never heard of Tegan and Sara, but just liked the name. I hope she meets a Sara in high school and they discover the band (through me, of course) and think of it as their own and they become best friends forever and ever.

John Ore

Holy SHIT but is their new album just amazing. This just makes it better: now I know which one Was A Fool and which is Not Your Hero.

Flora Poste

@John Ore It's so good! I bounce to work as I listen!


@John Ore I have a Grooveshark playlist that is called Go GO (Please Stay) and it is just "How Come You Don't Want Me Now" and "Now I'm All Messed Up" on repeat, forever.

I cannot get enough of this new album.


"...let's agree they both have short nails."

HA! Yes. Let's.


@wee_ramekin As soon as I read about the nails I was like "they should both have short nails?" And it made me laugh.


Melis, is the icon for this article over in the 'Most Viewed' section two strawberries because, much like your avatar, you want to take a bite out of Tegan and/or Sara?


All right, so. Since I've apparently staked out the bottom of the comments as my ~*~Personal T&S Fan-Girl Space~*~, let me just babble excitedly about how I got to see them in concert in Houston last week.

You guys....YOU GUYS. They are REAL. I've been a huge fan for years now (the song "The Con" perfectly described my life when I heard it the first time, and I've been hooked ever since), but I didn't actually imagine them as real people. But yeah, they're REAL and they are actually that tiny, and the light actually glances off their cheekbones in that way. You know...*that way*.

Anyway, it was an amazing performance, and I have to say, Sara has fucking *amazing* stage presence. She absolutely *killed* it on all her songs.

Gah, best concert I've ever been to, for sure.


@wee_ramekin THE CHEEKBONES. And jawlines. I love these ladies. I haven't seen them live yet, but good to know they deliver!

(Also this is totally unrelated to this thread but since it's Friday afternoon, thank you for being such a good person re: an unpleasant thread for me like a month ago that possibly you don't remember but also maybe you do? Either way, you are lovely.)


@cherrispryte (I think I remember the thread you're talking about, and NO PROBLEM. What that commenter did and said was completely uncalled for, and if someone wants to come at MY PINNERS like that, she better get ready to be [politely] burned with Fire.)


I told @I'm Right On Top of That, Rose about this thread, and she told me to make a comment on her behalf because she is indisposed. So....

I'm Right On Top of That, Rose: Girl, I'm not your hero. I just want back in your head, you know? Ugh, nobody likes to, but I just really like to cry.

(Actual text from an actual conversation, because, why, yes! You can have conversations entirely in Tegan & Sara lyrics, didn't you know?)


@wee_ramekin seems inefficient tbh

and it's not even my birthday

I once taught a pair of high school students named Teagan and Sarah. They were close friends, but were more into some combination of hardcore and goth music and didn't like Tegan and Sara. I urged them to go ahead and form an alternative, hardcore Te(a)gan and Sara(h), and maybe even take Tegan and Sara songs and just ratchet up the hardcore/goth potential in them, starting with "I'm Already Back In Your Head."


@and it's not even my birthday I like your alternative more, I think!


as a twin i'm game for the joke, but still constantly surprised at people's misconceptions.

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