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Wednesday, March 6, 2013

287

[Technical Difficulties]

Sorry for the delays on my end — I'm having some technical difficulties this week, although they're probably my fault by this point. How's everyone else's week going, on a scale of 1 to 2?



287 Comments / Post A Comment

mystique

Aw, the site misses Jane Marie!

My week is turning into a progression into sickness. But I will fight it!

Roxanne Rholes

@mystique I hope you can sleep a bunch! That's always a good way to fight illness. Good luck in your battle!

raised amongst catalogs

I'm not getting along with this week so far, either.

liverwortlaura

@raised amongst catalogs :( chin up... or chin under a snuggie with a warm mug of tea, a new book and some buttermilk biscuits........

raised amongst catalogs

@liverwortlaura I love how specific your advice is. Bless you.

A. Louise

@liverwortlaura I am getting biscuits tonight and I can't wait. Biscuits and deviled eggs. And bourbon. All of my comfort foods!

allendaniel

Beautiful baby!!!!!!!!@a

itiresias

Mine is a series of mishaps and unfortunate circumstances, tiny but infuriating together. Also, I think I'm getting a cold and have developed my first stye? I'm already way done.

thatgirl

I woke up at 5:30 crying from a horrible dream where my mom was really really sick. And they are testing the fire alarm in my office today.

Today is BUTTHOLES.

fondue with cheddar

@thatgirl That sucks so hard. Does this help?

rimy

@fondue with cheddar aw that is adorable!

thatgirl

@fondue with cheddar YES. Yes, that helps so very much. I want her to hang out with the Littlest Dalek.

fondue with cheddar

I wanted to hotlink it but wasn't sure if the site would let me. Let's see if it works...

Es
Es

@fondue with cheddar Oh, I was clicking through to see where I could buy that for my Hulk-obsessed niece until I saw the kid's mum made it! I bow to her amazingness.

rimy

Can I say it's a .5? Worst week in a long time. I'm sending good vibes to the site/everybody/myself - c'mon u can do it.

rimy

@rimy Things going wrong: screwed up at work yesterday- got something shipped out for a customer super late, my phone confidence-voice is off and I'm pretty sure I sounded like a little girl with a national client(embarrassing), horrible PMS where I have been a crabby bitch for 2 days now and still no period to be seen where the f*** are you period, guilt for being pissy with my sweet boyfriend last night, and also I'm scared about the fast-encroaching future which will be forcing a huge life change on us.

tmi but I feel better after acknowledging all that! It'll be ok.

fondue with cheddar

@rimy Ouch. But you WILL be okay! Here is a kitty asking for pets:

Megan@twitter

@rimy *good vibes for @rimy*

rimy

@fondue with cheddar thank you guys <3

laurel

@rimy When my phone voice fails me like that I make the next call standing up, after doing some deep breathing and dancing around a little. My puny voice seems to come from constricted breathing, from sitting or anxiety.

rimy

@laurel Sometimes when I'm in the type of mood where all I want is to do 2 hours of intensive yoga then curl up with a pint of gourmet chocolate chip ice cream, a glass or two of red wine, and watch Netflix - when feeling like that, my business swagger and chit-chatty socializing levels hit rock bottom and I get all awkward for no reason. Boo for me.

mangosara

@fondue with cheddar aaaaaah the kitty wants pets

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

I'm really into binary jokes these days, guys.

Beatrix Kiddo

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand the binary system and those who don't.

Is that how that goes?

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@Beatrix Kiddo
Exactly! If you have any more, please share them with me!

adorable-eggplant

@Beatrix Kiddo I actualol'd. Thank you.

highfivesforall

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, those who don't, and those who weren't expecting a base-3 joke.

Maladydee

@highfivesforall marry me.

PatatasBravas

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll I just hovered my mouse over that image for about six seconds before realizing that it wasn't actually the xckd website, so there would be no mouseover text. WELL DONE NERDY POTATOES.

hamiltonshotfirst

@Rock and Roll Ken Doll There are 11 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, those who don't, & those who try to tell this joke out loud.

SarahP

My week would be infinitely better if I felt like I had any free time, but it's not so bad. 2.

SarahP

@SarahP I just realized I could have free time tomorrow if I went home instead of volunteering after work, but then I'd spend my free time feeling like a terrible person for doing that. DILEMMA.

Nicole Cliffe

I read eighty articles on Aaron Swartz at five am and cried, so it's really a banner day for everyone.

zamboni

so this week is awful for everybody? okay. not sure if that makes me feel better or worse!
anyway here is a puppy chilling out in a striped onesie (ITS FEET ARE IN THE FEET).

fondue with cheddar

@zamboni OMG ITS FEET ARE IN THE FEET

HereKitty

@zamboni Really needed that, thank you!

rimy

@zamboni omg thank you, this made me smile.

adorable-eggplant

@zamboni This dog (http://www.austinpetsalive.org/adopt/available-dog-details/?ID=19214836#) doesn't have a onsie, but loook at the widdle legs. They are so short.

zamboni

@adorable-eggplant oh my god the spots on the edges of her ears.

Bittersweet

@adorable-eggplant Hooray for dogs with big ears and short legs!

adorable-eggplant

@zamboni The spots kill me! They are so cute.

@Bittersweet I think her ears are as big/tall as her legs.

fondue with cheddar

My week is just kind of "eh". I mean it could be worse, but it isn't great. I traveled (not for fun) this weekend and feel like I never had a weekend, I feel like I'm starting to get sick, and I'm tired.

I'm also trying really hard to get this stupid molar taken care of but apparently all dentists are specialists now and I'm bouncing around to different dentists/specialists trying to figure out what to do, and I've finally got a consultation (the third one!) on Friday but that's just a consultation and who knows how long I'll have to wait for the actual extraction. I've been in pain for two weeks, eating mostly pasta and yogurt and pudding, and my meds (leftover from old prescriptions) are almost gone (holy shit did riding in a plane hurt my mouth). Also, did I mention that I am terrified of dental stuff and pain management doesn't work very well for me? ARGH LET IT BE OVER ALREADY.

meetapossum

@fondue with cheddar I know this happened like 2 weeks ago, but how was karaoke?

fondue with cheddar

@meetapossum It was a lot of fun, thanks for asking! It was a little scary because there was a lot of room between the band and the crowd, so you could see every single person looking at you. I decided to be brave and sign up for the first song to get things started because nobody else was, and they always do a warm-up song by themselves first, so it's not like I was really going to be first. But they didn't do a warm-up song! I was terrified! The crowd was big enough that there were enough singers to fill it out, but small enough that everyone had a chance, and several people sang a few times. I ended up singing three songs, including one duet with my friend. I'm really sorry you weren't able to make it. Maybe next next time! ;)

Hot Doom

Mercury in retrograde!

My week is a hodgepodge of major, major suckitude to very excellent. I just got a rejection from a job that I desperately wanted and need (though HR said they liked me and would keep me as a 'reserve candidate').
On the major excellent side, today, I paid off a credit card that has been a monkey on my back for a decade, and as a result of not getting an interview for aforementioned job, it means I can fly back to the States for an overdue visit! :( / :)

Blondsak

@Hot Doom Sorry to hear about the job :( But, if you go to the Billfold and e-mail Mike Dang to tell him your credit card is paid off, he will send you a personal Congratulations card which might make your week a little better :)

PennyCentury

@Hot Doom I registered just to say that. Pinche Mercury . Congrats on your credit card, that's awesome!

Barry Grant

@Hot Doom

So it's Mercury's fault then? I don't know how much of my personal dumpitude has been about communication but sure, I'll go with that.

franceschances

My week would be better if I were sitting on my couch in my PJs like the entire federal workforce.

Blondsak

@franceschances As someone who has been in video conferences all morning to make up for not having real meetings, I can assure you that is not what all of us feds are doing. Would that I could, though.

franceschances

@Blondsak Blerg sorry :( I guess I should amend that to just about every fed I personally know! Facebook is infuriating today. BUT I just found out I got into grad school so today is now a 2!

Blondsak

@franceschances Oh don't apologize! What everyone in the vid conferences don't know is that while my hair is done and I have a suit jacket on, I am wearing NO PANTS. So I still consider it a definite advantage to be at home :)

Congratulations! What degree are you going for?

franceschances

@Blondsak Trying to get my MPP in Health Policy! And rock on with your pantsless self!

MilesofMountains

Not bad, I guess? I have to work this weekend, but my "work" is going to be flying around in a helicopter looking for goats, so as long as I get some Gravol it should be fun.

rimy

@MilesofMountains That sounds like a lot of fun! What kind of job do you have?

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

@MilesofMountains Gravol is great but it makes me INCREDIBLY drowsy. I'd be a afraid of falling out of the helicopter...I've never been in a helicopter and I'm kind of afraid of it, can you tell???????????

MilesofMountains

@rimy I'm a biologist. I usually don't do much ungulate stuff, but I guess all the goat surveys have to be done in March, and the woman out doing them now wants to come home and see her baby sometime this month (the big jerk!) so I'm helping out.

@Katzen-party That's what I'm worried about (sleeping, not falling out of the helicopter, because the doors will be on but it'll be warm and comfy). I've never taken gravol before since I have a strong stomach, but I know I can't do 8 hours of straight flying without something. Maybe if I take enough caffiene?

Dirty Hands

@MilesofMountains Yeah goats! My week is being thrown off because I have to stay up all night tonight staring at goats to see if they're giving birth. Oh goats, why can't you wait for the weekend?

Miss Maszkerádi

I'm in the negative numbers. Word to the wise, in case I'm not the last person on earth to realize this: talking oneself into repeatedly going out with the pleasant but ultimately non-passion-inducing Dude B in an attempt to distract oneself from thoughts of the wonderful but at least currently probably-unattainable Dude A IS NOT GOING TO WORK. It will end with a disappointedly-fully-clothed Dude B feeling awkward and an even unhappier and more miserably-pining you feeling really awkward. MERCURY GET OUT OF RETROGRADE.

Miss Maszkerádi

@Countess Maritza also I've been having very vivid and often oddly disturbing dreams - not nightmares exactly just insidious subconscious angst - and I'm sick for the third time in two months and all my imbecilic allowing myself to be heartbroken over a relationship that never even really started has RUINED my semester momentum and I don't even know what I want to do with my life anymore.

So yeah. BUTTHOLES, you guys. THIS WEEK IS BUTTHOLES FOR ALL.

martinipie

@Countess Maritza Even despite my happy week I too have been having scary-ass dreams--the closest I've had to nightmares on a kid level, that aren't stress dreams about something impending--this week! It is so bizarre, I don't understand why, and what's also strange though is that I have been able to realize they were nightmares in the dream and wake myself up out of them before any real bad shit went down. So odd. I think Mercury doing wacky stuff tends to bring up wacky dreams--communication with your sleeping mind etc.

Briony Fields

@Countess Maritza Awww, be kind to yourself. Sounds like the dude situation sucks major bigtime, and that's never easy to get out of. In the meantime though, try not to beat yourself up over feeling bummed about it. Let it ~flow~, man.

(pardon my zen if that's not what you're feeling at the moment. Rage is good too.)

rimy

@Countess Maritza I have been having weird dreams, too. My last one involved terrorists taking over a small town in which I lived. We had to pack our things quickly and try to escape, there was no running water, everything was scary. We didn't make it, got caught, my boyfriend was shot, and one of the bad guys claimed me as his own. I woke up in a pool of sweat. I have been having others but I can't remember all the details. I normally have vivid dreams but many of mine have been on another level recently. Weird.

Miss Maszkerádi

@Briony Fields No, not rage. And the thing is, it's in a really ambivalent, could-still-happen, might-not, i have no idea what will happen situation with Dude A, but like, when I thought Dude A was a definite prospect, I was walking on fucking clouds for a month. I wish it would be resolved one way or the other.

Briony Fields

@Countess Maritza Ahhh, that hanging in between is the worst! What's the backstory with Dude A, why is he unattainable? Have you talked to him at all (if possible)?

Miss Maszkerádi

@Briony Fields I don't want to get too much into it but slightly long-distance geographically, busy work schedules, and an ex wanting to get back together and him being torn. SO I'm basically just going to wall myself up in a monastery now and resign myself to never ever being loved ever in my life.

the roughest toughest frail

@Countess Maritza I've been having incredibly vivid and disturbing dreams, too! They're not all nightmares, per se, just very distinctive. I'm normally a lucid dreamer, so when my anxiety ramps up (as it's been doing for the past couple of weeks), my dreams get more upsetting.
Anyway, yeah, this week (and last week) can suck a bag of dicks.

mystique

@Countess Maritza Does it help I was in almost identical situation a few months ago? It was fucking devastating when I was in the shit, because "what could've been" is so heartbreaking! It helped to write in a journal and get some serious distance in terms of communication. Maybe things will change in the far future and Dude A will be super attainable, or Dude B will be more fun, or Dude C will break your heart and Dude D will mend it again. Or maybe Dude A made it so you will only accept people who made you feel as good as Dude A did initially, and it means you don't have time for any other fool Dudes.

I dunno if this is helping, but I guess the key is let yourself feel like crap, because after feeling like crap I felt much better and less agonized and in general a less pining person. *hugs* for you.

OhMyGoshYouGuys

I got zero sleep last night, I'm PMS-ing, work is frenzied, and I'm about to punch our intern in the throat if he doesn't quit coughing. But I'm an optimist, so I'll give it a 2.

OhMyGoshYouGuys

@OhMyGoshYouGuys ALSO, after reading yesterday's post about cancer blog hoaxers, I trust NO ONE on the Internet. Except Hairpinners.

liverwortlaura

@OhMyGoshYouGuys I have this thing with coughing too! It seems almost every day I am stuck on the subway with someone hacking behind me. It's not that I don't have empathy, I have done my time with pertussis among other things, but my empathy sector is overloaded by auditory annoyance and paranoia of contagion.

OhMyGoshYouGuys

@liverwortlaura I think it's getting to me because I'm tired. I do sympathize. But it's near constant and the rest of the office is silent, so it's kind of amplified.

Miss Maszkerádi

@liverwortlaura Bodily noise of all sorts makes me stabby. I live next to a (very nice) family with a frequently tantrum-throwing kindergartener and a constantly, constantly screaming infant, and the building's walls are so thin that I can hear every time the allergy-stricken dad blows his nose. And due to apartment geography I hear every last decibel of what goes on in their bathroom and kitchen. GAHH.

rimy

@OhMyGoshYouGuys Yuck, coughing. I sit near an older lady with horrible smoker's cough and I sometimes have to get up and take a walk during some of her nastier nicotine-scented phlegmy episodes.

The hoax post creeped me out!

liverwortlaura

@Countess Maritza stabby for sure. I need to start wearing earplugs on the train to avoid the coughs, sniffling noses, eating, chewing gum, loud sighs, etc.

A. Louise

@OhMyGoshYouGuys my office mate coughed for the past 2 weeks and is only now FINALLY over his cough. I was so fixated on it and SURE I was going to get sick that I listened to french conversation language podcasts and Sophia Coppola's Marie Antoinette in like 10 minute installments on youtube all day because apparently pre-revolutionary France is my happy place. It helped a little.

I also made a TON of Emergen-C while scowling at him. That helped more.

redheaded_cat

@OhMyGoshYouGuys Hahaha, I totally feel you! I had the coughiest, sneeziest officemate, and while I felt awful for her allergies it was impossible to concentrate with all the hacking.

harebell

A job that I interviewed and got rejected for apparently forgot that they rejected me, so they just sent a second email to make sure. The first time was in January (a personal note), and now it's March.

Seriously I'm used to that sort of thing by now in my profession, so it had mostly a comic effect. But it does a beautiful job of standing in for the larger badness of this week in general!

liverwortlaura

@harebell oh god. Maybe you should send them a memo to NOT crush people unnecessarily when they can help it. Big hug, and hopefully we will all get through this week together (even if through a haze)

mangosara

@harebell one time I got a recruiting email for a position that I had been recruited for, interviewed for, and summarily rejected (or so I assume, because they never ever got back to me). YOU HAD ONE JOB, people.

Faintly Macabre

@harebell I once (well, many times) applied for a paid internship and never heard anything back. In this case, it was outside of my field but would have been a good opportunity. About five months later, a head of a related organization emailed me and said that they'd given her my resume and told her I interviewed for that internship, and that she was interested in having me intern with her. I am still confused about how that happened.

ifsolitude

@harebell Once I was ACCEPTED by a company (they told me I would be added to their freelance roster) and was then rejected a few weeks later, by someone who apparently forgot she had already contacted me. That burned. I've now gotten many jobs through that company, so I guess it turned out well.

khaleesi

So my week has actually been pretty awesome (feel bad since everyone else is having a crap time of it, good vibes to all) BUT I thought I was going to be disowned guys, and I wasn't. My dad still loves me. Not to go into too much detail but I come from a very traditional non Western background and any partner I chose was to be from said background. Needless to say my boyfriend is as white bread as they come. I figured dad would say no way in hell and I'd be disowned and he'd stop my family speaking to me but the news was broken to him this weekend and he said 'as long as she's happy and he's a good man, who'll look after her I'm ok with it.'

I honestly can't emphasise how much of a shock that was, that is not what I was expecting in the slightest.

liverwortlaura

@khaleesi what a joy when family surprises us in the best of ways!

polka dots vs stripes

@khaleesi That is really, really great news!

khaleesi

@polka dots vs stripes @liverwortlaura Thank you! I just felt like I had to keep waiting for the other shoe to drop but no, a ton of family now know and not one of the bad reactions I was expecting.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@khaleesi Your dad sounds like a good father. That's great news for you and your bf!

Es
Es

@khaleesi Good for your dad, and phew!

liverwortlaura

This week could be over, and I think this mid-week open thread is proof of that. Why can't it just be Friday? Lost my keys in the snow last night, in a slump at work, dealing with vague but uncomfortable interpersonal drama. But chocolate cake is on the menu tonight, so maybe things are looking up?

Briony Fields

@liverwortlaura Oh lordy, losing my keys in that manner is my worst nightmare. Poor you! Did you find them?
Chocolate cake helps. Yum.

liverwortlaura

@Briony Fields I was at the beach with my roommate and his daughter and we were running through the snow, rolling around, making snow angels... when I got back to the apartment I realized my keys were gone. We walked back to the beach but all our footprints, and even the snow angels, were completely swept away by wind.... so, NO. note to self, always zip coat pockets.

antarcticastartshere

It's spring break (I work in higher ed) which is awesome in that I don't have to deal with any other humans and terrible in that I am completely unmotivated to work. I also have a paper thing due for one of my grad classes on Monday and I'm doing a pretty good job not working on that.

BUT I'm having a lot of fun hanging out with my dude (we're going to see a movie tonight!) and joking around on twitter, so there's that?

Miss Maszkerádi

@antarcticastartshere Minus the dude, exactly my situation. Spring break ennui, procrastinated paper, general end-of-winter depression.

Also PMS. Is it just me or is at least half of this open thread PMSing at once? HAIRPIN. Have we synchronized like a girls' freshman dorm!?!

polka dots vs stripes

I might have a job offer, but I might not if I can't a certain issue with Personnel fixed, and at this point I've done everything in my power to fix the personnel issue (short of showing up unannounced at their office and demanding their help, which given that this is a state agency, might land me on a watch list somewhere). It's also a dream job (well, the entry-level version), a pay raise, I'd get to move downtown, basically: all of the good things! But maybe not.

So the week is either a 10 or a 1. Updates to follow in FOT.

Smallison

My week probably should be a 2, but I'm having a hard time feeling it. I just found out this weekend that my brother and his wife are having a baby - great news! Except they're due 2 days before my wedding. I'm super happy for them, and so excited to be an aunt, but the timing is bumming me out big time.

martinipie

I'm actually....having a good week! Cute dude and I are going on a date and he keeps sending me funny videos! I dropped my resume off at four places I like! My coffee is tasty! Two of my best college friends are coming to visit in ONE WEEK! So I am okay, though last week was MEGA BUMMER. I am sending out of my vibes to everyone and anyone who needs it.

sunfastrose

I'm recovering from wisdom teeth removal (3, none impacted). Pretty smooth recovery so far, although today I have a weird stuffiness in my throat of all places. And I'm wearing a turtleneck, which doesn't help with the feeling. I also want my appetite back, my ability to eat chewy foods (bagel!) and I want to run.

MoxyCrimeFighter

@sunfastrose Ooo, best of luck in recovery! I got a wisdom tooth out this summer and it suuuucked. The stuffiness might be part of a sinus thing, like maybe a postnasal drip - I remember my surgeon telling me that some weird sinus stuff could happen because the hole in your mouth is basically a bacteria highway to the rest of your head. Fun!

Briony Fields

Not bad. The weather has been nice. On the other hand, how on earth has this week been going by so slowly? Normally the days zip by. Anyway, a few mishaps but nothing big. Today I got paid for work I didn't do, because of a last minute cancellation. I dig that. On the other hand, I worked at 8am this morning, and I've basically been hanging around waiting all day to go to my last meeting at 8pm. It was nice having most of the day off, but I can't really relax when I have work ahead of me like that....and then a short turnaround, cause I start early tomorrow.

Addendum: I love my SO extra this week, so that's nice.

queenofbithynia

I stayed up most of the night excited about snow and sure they would cancel work in the morning. they did not. I have invented a cocktail for this feeling. the "snowquester" is one cadbury egg, one opiate of your choice and one giant snowflake. nobody who is not at work is allowed to have one.

I badgered my awful awful self-help-loving doctor into testing a whole bunch of crap at my physical & just got the results back. I DO have a vitamin D deficiency just as I claimed I probably did. I fucking do. a real one. is there a deepak chopra book for that, doctor? is there??? symptoms (according to the internet, not my doctor, I get no information from my doctor) include fatigue, anxiety, mild depression, anomie, ebbing of joie de vivre, sometimes falling down, maybe. check check check check check.

right now I am high on huuuuuge amounts of prescription vitamin D and one (1) snowquester.

Miss Maszkerádi

@queenofbithynia Good heavens is this an actual M.D. physician you're going to? My respect level for anyone plummets straight down as soon as they start referencing Deepak Chopra.....ugh.

Although, hello list of familiar symptoms. Vitamin D supplements, hm, don't mind if I do.

queenofbithynia

@Countess Maritza yes!!! it is unreal. She is a very severe middle-aged Russian woman, and such are my prejudices that I expected her to be very cold and intelligent, the way I like my doctors, and it took me a while to realize that actually she is nice, dumb and super new-agey. The accent disguises it a bit.

She prescribed me a weekly 50,000 iu D megadose but I think it is supposed to take a few weeks before you see any effects, if there are going to be any. if my comments suddenly become a lot more cheerful in April, that will be why.

Miss Maszkerádi

@queenofbithynia BWUHHHH. At the risk of gross generalizing, I've found many, many Russians/Ukrainians/East Slavs to be extremely, extremely prone to weird New Age bullshit. It's seriously like watching regular science just slowly lose its grip the further east one goes. When I think back to everyone I've ever known who legitimately believed in stuff like healing crystals, chakras, the "Law of Attraction" (thanks, miserable ex telling me all my misfortunes were my fault for having a negative attitude!) and space aliens building the pyramids and inspiring Buddha have all been Russian, Ukrainian, Serbian or in one notably Western outlier, Czech.

[sic]

@Countess Maritza Hooo boy, you're right about that. I've got one in my family who's really into pop psychology, pyramid power, all kinds of woo. Worships at the altar of John Gray (the "Men Are From Mars..." guy). I've actually heard her say "Men and women are different species, biologically speaking". Problem is, she's a neurologist. So, yeah...

Miss Maszkerádi

@[sic] I just tried to post a "Jon Stewart yelling "OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE" reaction gif to that, but it failed, so here, imagine it.

stonefruit

@queenofbithynia My Russian host-mom told me that women who don't get laid frequently enough get sick more often. So.

[sic]

@Countess Maritza Yeah, that was pretty much my reaction, too. With a dash of the Star Trek double facepalm.

Miss Maszkerádi

@stonefruit My Russian ex's mom was more about making sure I never sat on anything cold because I would instantly go infertile. (Upon reconsidering the implications of a boyfriend's mother panicking about my possible infertility....brb, gonna go sit on a bag of ice.)

queenofbithynia

@stonefruit oh shit but what if she's right

My Russian doctor also told me to give up coffee and I nearly walked out right then except I was crying and not wearing pants at the time. Who does that? Who SAYS that?

Brunhilde

@stonefruit I get sick constantly and I am a giant hooker. I hate to think how bad my health would be if I wasn't getting it on all the time?

stonefruit

@Countess Maritza Yes, after all, if you sit on the sidewalk your womb will freeze up and stop working.

Russian superstitions might be my favorite.

Faintly Macabre

@Countess Maritza I went to Kazakhstand with a group of kids from my college, and every time we had a little discussion circle while sitting on concrete, someone would walk by and beg us not to sit there.

sophia_h

@queenofbithynia Not to be alarmist, and glad the supplements are making you feel good, but you might want to try seeing another doctor just because vitamin D deficiency can go along with other illnesses too. Fight for your health! I spent three months last year bugging a clinic over my weird symptoms until they finally sent me to some specialists and I got diagnosed with something pretty serious, and now I am all for people letting their health providers know Something Is Wrong.

Decca

Fairly stressed out with university work, BUT am seeing Steve Reich tomorrow, which I am very excited about!

londonienne

@Decca Oh, that's very exciting. I went to his thing at the Barbican last year(?) and he was there. And he did the clapping thing. It was great! Have fun!

Porn Peddler

Guess I'm in the minority with the decent week. I'm going to an amazing sex nerd conference next week and I'm sharing my hotel room with two REALLY AWESOME people. I'm freaking out a little, but it's a good kind of freaking out, like "oh my god this thing is gonna be so cool I'm going to learn so much about other people in this industry and how to potentially advance my non-existent-career aaaagh omg"

londonienne

My week is going great! I was stressing about dumping my bf to the point where I got an eye twitch. But I ovaried up and did it and it went well. So I am freeeeee!!!!

But, in bad news, a mouse is living under my freezer.

Can we have mid-week open thread every week?

weebleswobble

@londonienne

Can you tell me more about the breakup, if you want? I just got broken up with a couple of days ago and I made sure to stay busy but today is the first day it's really hitting me and I am SO SAD. But in reality I know that when we were together I was SO ANXIOUS because I always felt like I was doing something wrong and wanted him to like me--but he just didn't, and that's okay and doesn't make him a bad person. So I'm in this weird place where I know it was probably for the best, but god, the sadness, ugh.

I don't break up with people usually, even when (see above) it's clearly not working. So I would love to get a glimpse of what it's like to "ovary up" as you say. And P.S. Congratulations on your freedom!

londonienne

@weebleswobble Sorry about your breakup. Staying busy is good, but feeling your feelings is also important. And projects, you've got to have projects.

We had only been together for 4 months and it was great at the start but I increasingly found him to be terrible, like everything he did made me cringe. And after stringing out my last breakup over several months I decided that just doing it and getting it over with is kinder. Actually, I broke up with him a couple of weeks ago but we agreed to give it another go, but it still wasn't working. The sad thing is that when we spoke last night he agreed with me, which kind of annoyed me! Like, was he going to say anything?! Gah!

But it is sad from this side too, I had hoped things would work out. And it is the worst conversation to have ever.

I hope you feel better soon *internet stranger hugs*

packedsuitcase

@londonienne I read that as a mouse was living in your underwear. I'm glad it's only under your freezer.

harebell

I'm so glad that a dear friend from out of town is coming unexpectedly to visit, and it will cheer me up. This week has just been a mess of waaaay too much teaching work and has just been revealing to me how much my students disrespect me. It's just the class of 19-year-olds, who are still growing up and don't fully realize what they're doing, not the older students, but still. Male 19-year-olds interrupting me and talking over me. Expecting me to respond to their emails any time of the day or night, immediately, like their personal robot. One in particular who blathers in really huge romantic generalities, so that if you try to respond to him you also feel and sound like an idiot because you have to adopt his gigantic f%cking generalities to some degree in order to make him feel heard/respond effectively. I'm not even sure what he is doing is thinking -- it is more like wild random free association.
I don't know, maybe I just have to stop engaging as much, and let them spin their own wheels for a while until they figure shit out on their own. Some things you probably can't teach.
It's such a taboo to say negative things about your students, so I really appreciate the chance for an anonymous VENT.

rimy

@harebell Yikes! Teaching both terrifies and intrigues me as a profession, so kudos to you for having the bravery to get in front of a group of judgmental/idiotic in varying degrees young people and put yourself out there every day! I don't have much teaching experience of that age range so I can't really offer advice much as I'd like to - just sympathy.

And for young blowhards, I'd say just let them vent and move on. I remember kids like that from my college classes and all they really want is an audience or to seem smart. They are dumb and I'm sure many people are rolling their eyes internally at him - you can too! It's totally ok!

anachronistique

@harebell You are not alone. One of my friends is a TA and regularly vents about her students in her locked journal. Because you need to!

harebell

@rimy @anachronistique

Thanks for the sympathy. I've been doing this for a while and it should be no sweat, or even fun, but different groups of students have different chemistry & personality, and for whatever reason this year's group has a really high percentage of young blowhards -- what a great term for it, by the way! It makes me feel better just thinking it in their direction -- young blowhard! (especially since they are just 19 and do grow out of that stage eventually usually).

rimy

@harebell I would probably be horribly condescending in my head when they begin droning on about this or that world-shatteringly brilliant idea that they just happened to think up on the spot, wow they must be soooo smart. Something along the lines of "it's nice that you have thoughts".

Is there a way you could change the dynamic away from class discussions and into another type of feedback that would allow the quieter and more thoughtful voices some room for expression?

harebell

@rimy
Yes, I was thinking I might treat them like my freshmen, and give them actual physical pieces of paper and ask them to write out by hand, in class, a short essay-answer to a prompt. It usually produces better thinking than just oral discussion, it's nice to remind them of the experiential difference in writing by hand (which often produces more complex/sustained thinking than typing), and after doing that it's much easier to successfully "cold call" the quieter students to read their responses out loud. Plus, I think that having written something out gives them a little sense of accomplishment.

haha, I do sometimes have the sarcastic comments in my head when certain ones are talking, (or more like "oh, shit! not again! how do I head this off/what can I pull out of this comment?!") but not too much because they can usually feel it if I do, and then it's counter-productive. Such an emotional relationship, small-group teaching.

Do you teach younger ones?

rimy

@harebell Not currently! I have a little bit of experience as a one-on-one tutor with kids, a little bit of ESL experience with teenagers, and a little bit of experience teaching ESL to mixed age groups (refugees recently arrived in the States). I like teaching (and LOVE analyzing teaching methodology) but it's exhausting and requires a lot of personal investment and an opaque bias. I might pursue it further, but I'm not sure yet!

Sending good teaching vibes your way!

Judith Slutler

@harebell Ooo I would definitely do the "make them write things down" deal. Another thing I've done in project situations where there are a bunch of loudmouths (I include myself in the loudmouth category) is have everyone write down 3 ideas on a piece of paper, then pass it to the left, then the next person has 2 minutes to write down something based on the ideas above, pass it to the left, etc. until the papers go all the way around the room. It can be really good for forestalling annoying monologues or the dumb negative-spiral type of brainstorming that sometimes happens.

PatatasBravas

@harebell My favorite response to vague and/or self-important comments is "Well, that's intriguing, but you'd need to write a 500 page book to defend all the different parts of that statement! Can you think of a more specific response to the ______ in the text?"

And if they're truly free associating/doing terrible bullshittery, then they have to actually think about it. I also usually wait three seconds before dropping a cheerful "Okay keep thinking about it! How about _____? What are your thoughts on the matter?" to a quiet smart kid.

Also don't feel bad AT ALL for not responding to their emails even if they give you shit about it. I tell them straight-up that I won't likely answer emails between 6pm and 6am, because I have a life. And if they bug me about it? Then I tell them that if I were their employer and not their teacher, then their casual tone and inappropriate workplace actions would get their asses fired.

Then they look scared and shape up, and I am able to write them letters of rec in a few years without fear!

(sorry for the long ramble)

Miss Maszkerádi

@queenofbithynia Good heavens is this an actual M.D. physician you're going to? My respect level for anyone plummets straight down as soon as they start referencing Deepak Chopra.....ugh.

Although, hello list of familiar symptoms. Vitamin D supplements, hm, don't mind if I do.

hallelujah

I've been practicing my English accent for Kate Nash karaoke since that post yesterday, so things could be worse.

raised amongst catalogs

@hallelujah Yes, but have you been practicing...THE JACKAL?

Verity

@raised amongst catalogs I read an article about someone the other day which included the phrase "some people call him The Jackal". and was deeply amused.

hallelujah

@raised amongst catalogs ALL TIME BEST CJ MOMENT.

raised amongst catalogs

@hallelujah And that says a lot, because there are so many great CJ moments. I also want to point out that "The Jackal" moment brought out the best in ALL of the other characters.

hallelujah

@raised amongst catalogs Accurate. No one spent nearly enough time marveling at her greatness.

Jinxie

Ugh. I'm going to rank my week at a big fat ZERO so far for a number of reasons, not the least of which is the fact that I've been sleeping even worse than usual lately. I'm so tired I'm beyond tired; not yawning and droopy-eyed but just feeling really stupid and ragey. And there was way too much wine consumed last night at my friend's house (we were catching up on Vampire Diaries, so wine was necessary) so now I'm both exhausted AND hungover.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

During my emotionally unhinged week last week, I made my first impulse purchase - a Playstation 3. I've never even played one before, but somehow I walked into the store looking for a blender and walked out with a PS3. It's like I'm regressing. Anyway, that shit is awesome. I'm having so much fun on it! And it's...it's actually helping my relationship issues? Because neither gf nor I have ever played one, and then we start with a super-involved game called Skyrim and now we're obsessed with helping each other beat it? I'll take what I can get at this point.

Chareth Cutestory

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose I was just telling my boyfriend I want to get a Playstation 3 so I can play the new Tomb Raider! And Journey! (I definitely don't have the money for it right now, though, so I'm kind of just hoping that someone else I know gets one and I can mooch off them.)

zamboni

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose my old house/roommate had a PS3 and I watched a lot of Skyrim get played. It seems great!
You can also put Netflix on your PS3 if you really never want to leave the house again!

OhMarie

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose Oh man! I love my PS3! I use it literally every day (mostly for Netflix). Tell me what else you like to play and I will tell you what to get.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@OhMarie I'm using it for the game so far, but we definitely use it for Netflix as well. It blew me away that the games are on Blu-Ray discs. Unreal. So fun. Have you played Journey? That one looked delightful.

adorable-eggplant

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose Does Assassins Creed come on PS3? If so I am very, very jealous.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@adorable-eggplant It does! I looked at that one, and it's only like $19 (the original one) and the other two are available as well. But I was also drawn to Lego Harry Potter, so it's not like I know what I'm doing when it comes to picking out games.

OhMarie

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose Yes, Journey was amazing! Actually, my husband was the one who read about it and purchased it so I went into it knowing 0 about the game. The whole thing is that you can run into other actual people as you go, but I thought that the game had decided I was lost and sent me a Tutorial Friend to help me through.

ayo nicole

0!!!!!

I'm sick. And I'm very dramatic about being sick, always. I thought for sure that I'd wake up today feeling better but I'm still gross. If I hear something positive at work or maybe from my cruuuuuuush it'll bump me up to about .5. I really hate being sick.

Dancercise

This week, man. My roommate got engaged and is planning to get married in June, so I'm going to need to find a new roommate (always scary). And I'm a final-two applicant for a job I really want and should find out this week. So much uncertainty!

teaandcakeordeath

I havent been able to stop singing Fleetwood Mac's "I wanna be with you everywhere" since watching this video of ponies dancing. Argh I am slowly but joyfully driving myself crazy.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@teaandcakeordeath Well shit, now I'm obsessed. I love the little one-two-step as the pony really gets going.

tea sonata

@teaandcakeordeath These past two weeks I have been listening to mostly this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qBTuwX9hj0

Excuse me while I go and watch Matilda.

stuffisthings

My week's going OK -- no THUNDERSNOW in the District but we got the day off at least.

Jinxie

@stuffisthings I know I shouldn't be, because extreme weather is a total pain in the ass, but I'm really jealous of all y'all's snow and snow days. Damn you, temperate coastal climate! {shakes fist}

fabel

My week is sucking. I have cramps right now & it's dreary & I made plans I feel like I shouldn't have made tonight, and now am stressing. And I took a camera phone picture of my face to send to my boyfriend, & I looked all puffy in it for no reason.

MY SAD TALE

packedsuitcase

I submitted my first grad school app Monday and having it out of my control is making me cranky.

Elsajeni

I have been having a series of sexy dreams about a hot celebrity and EVERY ONE OF THEM has ended with my subconscious remembering I'm married and cockblocking (... vagblocking?) me. Usually by actually making me say, in the dream, "I'm flattered, but actually I'm married, so we'd better not." WHAT THE FUCK, BRAIN. THAT IS WHAT DREAMS ARE FOR.

Miss Maszkerádi

@Elsajeni I had a sexy dream recently about an attractive-but-married colleague of mine (who was also married in the dream because my brain is a boring literalist) but the justification used in the dream for why we could make out frantically was that we were extras in a movie and this scene needed a passionate couple in the background? I dunno. I woke up disoriented, slightly scandalized but cracking up at myself.

Heat Signature

I'm actually having a decent week, but um, apparently NO ONE ELSE I KNOW is...two co-workers are dealing with the deaths of close relatives, my step-brother just found out that his wife is moving down South and taking the kids with her so he's filing divorce papers, and people are getting sick all around me. BUT I have three boxes of Girl Scout cookies staring at me and I'm not eating them AND I have a job interview on Friday, so yay for that.

anachronistique

Huge work deadlines finished last week, but I'm still super exhausted and a number of my friends are in crisis mode, which makes me feel terrible for being unable to do anything to help. Also we're supposed to get the tail end of that storm as mostly rain and wet snow, which will make commuting a total delight. I'm gonna rate it a 1.5.

frigwiggin

Nothing super-great or terrible has happened this week, but I still feel kind of blechy. Probably because I need more sleep. Buhhh. That should be easy, and yet.

(P.S. I hope everyone is working on their mix CDs!)

[sic]

@frigwiggin Just finished burning mine, working on the packaging!

Miss Maszkerádi

@frigwiggin I need to figure out some way to get stuff off my iPod and onto my computer, but Mixtape Partner,fear not!

Es
Es

I had a very pleasant day off on Monday, spent it playing with ponies in the sun, and it was light and warm enough after work yesterday to go and ride out for a proper length ride and not race the sun home. Pub tonight with a bunch of friends! The downside has been the chiropractor and a sacroiliac strain, but at least I know what it is and it's being treated. I am determinedly being positive and retaining my zen and not thinking about work crap.

Judith Slutler

I am going to see my bf this weekend and my period just started ARGH WHY

On the upside I am switching into a nicer room within my apt. and I turned in a big paper on Monday!

Miss Maszkerádi

@Emmanuelle Cunt I swear. The Hairpin has synchronized like an all-girls dorm.

tea sonata

@Countess Maritza Sales of DivaCups have probably boomed over the past week. Ovaries are shedding in anticipation.

Judith Slutler

@tea sonata Seriously it has been so long since we've had penetrative sex that I am, for the first time, starting to consider trying it with the cup in.

frigwiggin

@tea sonata You just reminded me that GladRags (a cool menstrual-products company that sells DivaCups and cloth pads) is having a $10 off deal on their value kits with the code MARFORTH13 until midnight. (Also free shipping with no code.) Mmmmmaybe someone will get some use out of this information!

tea sonata

@Emmanuelle Cunt "AH I'M CLOSING OVER".
"But with a convenient removable handle, I see?"

Alternatively, I remember a comment someone left on the DivaCup thread about someone who did just that, and the comment was "What is in you that is stabbing me?" And I lol'd heartily. (My sense of humour may be broken)

Judith Slutler

@Emmanuelle Cunt in case I wasn't being clear, please everyone advise on period sex logistics.

Ellie

@Emmanuelle Cunt That is the worst! I hate timing like that.

I don't think I have any special advice although for whatever reason I've had a lot of period sex and, even, all of it has been with casual sex partners/hookups so if you have someone you can actually negotiate putting a towel down or something with, I would think it'd be even less of a problem. It's always worked out ok. I use tampons and I take it out right before having sex, either, like, right in my room, or in the bathroom if that's more suitable, and put one in right afterwards. I also once did this outdoors by the Charles River across from Harvard Square, so I didn't have to worry about blood on the sheets in that circumstance. (Unhelpful I know, but entertaining?) I've never got blood on my sheets - I did get a little bit of blood on someone else's sheets once but that was after a LOT of sex.

Ellie

@Ellie Also, I realize that all sounds pretty moronically obvious, so maybe never mind.

HeyThatsMyBike

@Emmanuelle Cunt @Countess Maritza. ME THREE!

Miss Maszkerádi

@HeyThatsMyBike I'm more in the "massive existential despair" stage of the PMS right now, but we're all sort of eerily within a week of each other, it seems.

Judith Slutler

@Ellie I don't know if it's that obvious! I've really never had period sex and the prospect legit makes me nervous. So, I think that helps to hear.

Ellie

@Emmanuelle Cunt Oh, good! Yes, I don't think it's really too nervewracking. I think one can generally go a little while without tampon/cup/whatever else in without getting blood on anything. Just don't like stare at the condom afterwards if you are using those because it can be a little gross. And maybe put a towel down. I am a big worrier about everything and this is one thing I have found to be NBD. Have fun!

sophia_h

@Emmanuelle Cunt Maybe TMI, but if you're really worried you can wear a pad, keep your underwear on, and just kind of yank them to the side (woman on top works best for this). Then when you get up you just move your underwear back in place real quick and you don't make a mess. I don't wear tampons and I'm paranoid about stains, so that's my workaround.

Kate Kane

@Emmanuelle Cunt Large, dark towel on the bed! That's my only real tip. (Oh, that and remember to warn your bf beforehand you're having your period so he doesn't have the experience a male friend had with his gf of "oh my god, why is my penis bloody!?" Apparently that was less hilarious to him than it was to her.)

PatatasBravas

@Emmanuelle Cunt MAROON OR DARK RED TOWELS. They totally work. Worth the lolz in the aisles of BedBathWhatevs. Then to hell with the underwear or whatever precautions!

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

I GOT HIT IN THE FACE WITH A TENNIS BALL. That's my week so far! Also, I rolled up the rim on my Tim Horton's cup and won a free coffee...while I was on a bus leaving Canada and going back to my Tim Horton's-less home state. :(

adorable-eggplant

@Katzen-party Mail the cup to a friend as part of a surprise package?

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@Katzen-party "Now I'll NEVER be a model!"
or, alternatively, "Ms. Stoeger, my plastic surgeon doesn't want me doing any activity where balls fly at my nose." "Well, there goes your social life."

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose Yesssss, I thought of that line from Clueless IMMEDIATELY upon realizing that I had been hit square in the forehead by a tennis ball (I was actually just walking by a tennis court when it happened!!!).

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@Katzen-party That sounds like a meet-cute from a movie. Did you fall in love with the errant-shot maker?

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

@adorable-eggplant After trying to scheme of ways to get back up to Canada before May 19th (last day to redeem!) and coming up empty, I'm thinking I might do just that!

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose He didn't see the ball hit me and for about two seconds I thought about yelling, "Hey, you hit me in the MOTHERFUCKING FACE!" but then thought the better of it and skedaddled before he could appear looking for his errant ball. But now I realized I missed an opportunity to have a romantic comedy based on my life. TALK ABOUT HAVING A BAD WEEK.

tea sonata

There have been many good things about this week so far, sorry to buck the trend! Monday was weirdly good, yesterday was SUNNY and IN A GOOD MOOD and today had a productive morning, although I am exhausted now. Truly exhausted. And there is chicken in the oven... Soon.

And a man on a bike winked at me as he cycled past me whilst I was waiting to cross the road! Will wonders never cease. I thought he was winking at the person behind me but I am choosing not to believe that. I AM THE WINKEE, DAMMIT

A. Louise

I went and saw a documentary on local farming last night and it made me feel really warm and fuzzy inside about people doing both rewarding and commercially successful things - apparently it can be done, guys!

But now after sitting through person after person saying, "I quit my cubicle job to do this and my only regret was not doing it sooner, I'm so happy," I am really not motivated to sit in my cubicle today.

area@twitter

Monday and the first half of Tuesday were suckass, but things have been slowly improving from there, helped by two things:

1) The coworker I'm having trouble with? EVERYONE in the office is having trouble with her and it's not just me. And I got a promise that she wouldn't become my supervisor in the upcoming reorganization, which, phew. (And my current supervisor said lots of kind things about me and the work I'm doing and the way I'm relating to all my other coworkers, so yay!)

2) After fifteen years of needing antidepressants, I finally (FINALLY) realized that, hey, those days that have happened every month or two since i was in college? When I wake up and feel that I absolutely can't get out of bed, that the day is an impossible obstacle and the only hope is to huddle under the covers, with occasional breaks to tell myself how weak and horrible I am? That might be because of the depression. So I'm seeing my therapist on Saturday to give myself a little help.

Also, work was cancelled today due to the snow (yay!) and I am sitting at home playing video games and deciding what to bake this afternoon.

PatatasBravas

@area@twitter GO YOU

<3

area@twitter

@PatatasBravas >>HUG<<
Thank you. :D I also had sriracha for the first time today (on deviled eggs). Glorious seasoning, get in my mouth and bring all of your friends.

Verity

My boyfriend and I both had Monday off work so I could stay at his for a long weekend, so the week feels like it's only just starting. We watched the entirety (six episodes) of Eternal Law, a wonderful, ridiculous programme about angels who are lawyers in York trying to help humans. Samuel West is in it, and I adore him. It was great.

I went to see the doctor yesterday and discussed stopping my antidepressants to see how things go (it's been three years, and now seems as good a time as any to try it). He was fine with it, although I have been reading about SSRI discontinuation syndrome and panicking slightly. I'm worried that things will get worse, but I should be brave and go for it. I also found that I still have blood in my urine, for no apparent reason (I had a presumed UTI in January and was given some antibiotics, but there are no more bacteria showing up and I feel fine), so am being referred on to see if anything's up with my kidneys. It's a bit worrying, and I feel paranoid that it's my fault for not being healthy enough.

taco-salad dot com

@Verity Some of the SSRIs like Prozac take a long time to clear out of your system, which can make it easier to go off them. Just go as gradually as you need to and try not to freak out - it can be done. Good luck :)

enic

Most of my week has been shitty... I wrote a letter to a school I applied to reminding them I really wanted to go there and telling them all the amazing things I've done since I've applied, sent it to my boyfriend to proof, and got his email back to send it. I returned to my inbox and lo and behold! there was a rejection letter from said school.

On the other hand, I forgot my Metrocard expired, but the bus driver let me ride the bus till it stopped at the subway station, run down and reload the, and run back up to the bus. Such kindness!

meetapossum

How do I go into my annual review next week and ask for a raise without getting upset? I get emotional very easily, especially in stressful situations.

harebell

@meetapossum
I hope the professional negotiator who sometimes reads here will come along and given you even better advice than mine. But~ I think what helps most is to get yourself into the mindset that it's not personal, and it's a conversation among equals -- you have some goals, the company has other goals, you explain why you think a change is justified (with concrete examples of ways you have contributed that you went over with yourself in advance), they respond, you discuss. It's a practical decision, not an expression of how much they value you as an individual.

This might be cheesy but if I need to keep my cool in an emotionally painful/stressful situation, sometimes I visualize myself and the other person in separate spaces. E.g. there is a stone wall with climbing flowers growing on it between me and them, and we are talking, but they can't move into my space to do anything that would directly affect/hurt me. The person who taught me that trick uses a glass wall, but I like the stone wall with waving plants -- whatever you want that helps you take yourself emotionally out of a situation and feel more detached.

Jinxie

@meetapossum I know this sounds kind of corny, but can you do a practice session or two with someone? Do some review role-play with a friend?
And don't underestimate the power of making lists and notes! I went into my last review with a list of points I wanted to make and it made a huge difference, since I wasn't stressed out by trying to remember anything.
Good luck to you! Asking for what you need/want is really tough when you're not used to doing it, but it's a great skill to learn. We should all be willing and able to advocate for ourselves.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@harebell How do you do this without being totally distracted? I'd want flowers on my wall and maybe an attractive minstrel singing for me, possibly a few soft bunnies hopping around.

@meetapossum Cliches are cliches for a reason - thus, the saying "it's not personal, it's business" has its merits. Bring your A game to the discussion and lay out you're an asset and why you deserve to be compensated as such. @harebell's got the right idea.

harebell

@I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

haha, I would enjoy visiting your wall! Seriously, usually the stress of the situation keeps me focused on that, and so it's just the bare essentials of keeping the wall up that are going on in my mind -- but it is such a relief to check back mentally and find it there. Admittedly, I started out doing the visualization because of a truly awful ex that I had to keep running into -- but it also works well in certain professional situations, especially ones where I feel like I'm about to be judged. To each his own!

meetapossum

Thanks, guys! I never considered the wall idea. I should try that. I do tend to take things too personally, so that's valuable advice.

@Jinxie I'm actually going to go over talking points with my friend who is far better at this kind of thing than I am. The only thing he keeps telling me that annoys me, though, is that I should ask for much more money than I'm planning to. But he's a banker and doesn't understand that my publisher bosses would probably laugh in my face if I gave them his figure.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

@harebell You are welcome at my wall anytime. I do think it's a good idea. There's the whole idea of protecting oneself and having up walls that people have to break down to get through to the Real You, etc., but yours is a good wall to be able to call upon in times of need.

Also, my wall would have a homemade donut stand, where they fry them up right there and sprinkle them with powdered sugar.

The Silver Lining

This week has been brutal...nothing but rejection letters for jobs. Does anyone have any advice on how a recent MA grad with no work experience can find a job (fields of study are IR/Diplomacy/Policy)?

mystique

@The Silver Lining Wow are you in my program? That's what I'm looking for currently for when I graduate in May, but the people in my program are iffy when it comes to employment :( I have no advice other than reaching out to contacts like professors and people you've worked with!

The Silver Lining

@mystique Thanks! Today was just a rough day, as a position I had made it all the way to the end for sent me a rejection letter this morning. Stupid economy.

Miss Maszkerádi

Has anybody else been following this weird story about racist vandalism at Oberlin? Apparently two jerks with Sharpies were running around writing nasty graffiti all over campus, then the other day somebody mistook a student wandering around wrapped in a blanket for (seriously) a KKK intruder and everybody flipped the shit and classes were cancelled for a day of near-mandatory rallies and demonstrations.

I'm so conflicted about this. On the one hand, obviously racism = terrible. On the other hand....doesn't "don't feed the trolls" sometimes apply to real life too? And honestly, looking at the scale and grandiosity of the day of solidarity, you'd think that someone had been killed. I mean.....jackassery happens in the world, and society can not grind to a screeching halt every time some asshole succeeds in hurting people's feelings with bad words.

I used to go to Oberlin, though, so maybe I'm oversensitive to the place's frequent oversensitivity. Go on, call me a bad person.

leastimportantperson

@Countess Maritza I for one will never fault anyone for being exasperated with Oberlin.

Judith Slutler

@Countess Maritza I've heard a bit about it. American college campuses are such weird little bubbles that I can totally see how 2 fuckheads with sharpies can freak everyone out. And really, minority support organizations shouldn't have to just ignore racist graffiti. Don't feed the trolls doesn't really come into play when some asshole is writing "whites only" over water fountains. The cancelling classes thing because of someone who was maybe just wrapped in a blanket...? IDK.

sophia_h

@Countess Maritza I got mad when people started talking about "hoaxes"; yes, it's possible that white or minority students are just doing this to "raise awareness" or otherwise troll without actually believing what they're writing, but the point of hate speech is that it creates a harassing environment regardless of intent. So for the students on campus who've been upset by the graffiti, there isn't really a neutral explanation that can take away what they've experienced.

Miss Maszkerádi

@everybody I basically just think the cancelling classes was a big overreaction. Emmanuelle, I'm curious, is it the IRL nature of the trolling or the fact that it's racist in nature what makes it not ok to "not feed the troll" in this case?
In this case it seems it was widespread enough that some pointed editorials in the school paper and maybe some assemblies outside of regular class hours would have been appropriate. But the campus-wide shutdown just strikes me as playing right into the attention-whoring twits' hands.

I guess I also get struck the wrong way by it because when I was at Oberlin, I and many, many other women at the school were the repeated targets of constant, direct, vile harassment and defamation, directed clearly at us each personally by name, by anonymous trolls (our roommates, classmates, maybe even teachers for all we know) on the Oberlin Confessional website. (Jezebel had a piece about it a few months ago, I guess in its latest incarnation.) I don't deny that it's probably painful for a black student to see something randomly racist scrawled on a wall, but this was aimed directly at individuals, and it was fucking relentless. Went on for months. A lot of us considered dropping out, most of us ended up in various degrees of therapy, our semester was ruined, and - nobody ever had a candlelight vigil for us, nobody called a rally to protest students' inhumanity to student, nobody in power ever called for a day of hugging and healing. We petitioned over and over again to have the site taken down but every time, the administration shrugged, said "free speech" and told us to suck it up. So nicely done, Oberlin, showing your priorities.

chrysopoeia

I'm just starting the worst process known to man: New York apartment hunting.

HeyThatsMyBike

@chrysopoeia My thoughts and sympathies are with you in this difficult time. I hope you can take solace in the memories of the good times (when you weren't searching for an apartment in New York).

redheaded_cat

It's a negative something, I think. Does anyone have good online resources for depression? I've woken up every morning and my first thought has been 'NO!!!' And I used to be a happy, cheery, morning person, excited about all the day had to hold.

Miss Maszkerádi

@redheaded_cat I thiiiiiink it's possibly just end-of-winter blues? It seems like a lot of us are going through a similar funk right now and I for one often get like this when it's been cold and dreary for months, and spring should be coming but ISN'T. I wouldn't personally worry too much about clinical depression yet? Try vitamin D (sunlight!), exercise, kitten videos. Now I should also practice what I preach here.

redheaded_cat

@Countess Maritza I live in Texas, and every day has been sunny for the last 2 months. It's because my boyfriend broke up with me in the middle of an (ongoing) cancer scare, accusing me of being unable to "go with the flow." So now I'm alone again, and scared of cancer. I just feel like I haven't got many reasons to get out of bed.

par_parenthese

@redheaded_cat Oh my GOODNESS, that is TERRIBLE. Sending every good thought/vibe/prayer I can work up. :(

Sleep, exercise, hydration, good food, and a counselor or support group! Please! Can your oncologist/GP hook you up with a referral?

redheaded_cat

@par_parenthese Yes, I've been going to a really great therapist for the past few weeks. And I'm doing all the right things -- I make myself eat and sleep (even though I wake up terrified 4-5 times a night), I go to yoga, I just joined a running group, etc. But all I can think about is how much I hate having to live without him, and how much I want my old life back. Nothing is helping!

par_parenthese

@redheaded_cat I am so sorry. :( :( :( I have felt that feeling of nothing is helping. I hope that really soon you can look back at this time and see that the things you thought weren't helping were actually helping all along.

Miss Maszkerádi

@redheaded_cat I feel like the world's biggest asshole for telling you to get sunlight and it would all be better. Sorry!!!

frenz.lo

My boss texted me this morning at 5:30 to tell me I didn't have to come in today, texted me again at 7:45 to ask me to please come in after all. I made it in at 9:00. Then she ended her day at 12:45 and gave me a ride home. Thank you, weather non-event, for a baffling and annoying day! But now I'm home with my dug and my cats, so I guess all's well that ends well.

stonefruit

I feel like my week has, so far, been super-productive. Laundry, grocery shopping, house-cleaning (take THAT, pile of dishes!), talked with parents and siblings, and helped a friend with wedding prep stuff (wedding is on Sunday, eee!). Also it looks like that productivity is extending to the work side of things, which is nice.

Also seeing my sweetie tonight and tomorrow night.

The only thing that is missing is a snow day, and I've finally accepted that we just don't usually get those in the Bay Area.

Dirty Hands

@stonefruit

You're... you're having a good week... who ARE you?!

stonefruit

@Dirty Hands I DON'T EVEN KNOW.

stonefruit

@Dirty Hands Also, Cadbury Creme Eggs have arrived at local Walgreens! Seriously I don't even know.

Brunhilde

This week is shit. I fell on my face and broke my glasses and I'm covered with bruises. I have a specific type of insomnia that lasts from 4 am until my alarm goes off, at which point I immediately fall asleep and then I'm late for work, I feel like I'm going to throw up all the time, and I have a constant anxious quaking inside that's starting to physically manifest in hand tremors.

redheaded_cat

@Brunhilde Oh gosh, I'm sorry. I've got that same kind. A couple things that have helped me are taking half a sleeping pill when I wake up at some ungodly hour, and trying to fall asleep somewhere else (i.e. the couch).

raised amongst catalogs

@Brunhilde Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about ALL of that. Does your insurance situation allow for you to see a doctor? The early-morning waking has been a symptom (for me) of depression, which would go along with your anxiety. I really hope you feel better soon. That is the WORST.

melmuu

Here are some pretty rainbow pancakes. I love them. I love you, rainbow pancakes. http://tinyurl.com/bfwtv6b

ms. alex

Neutral, I guess. I had Sat-Tues off, and now I'm working from today through Sunday. I kind of forgot how to work/be responsible after four days of sleeping 3am-12pm and leaving the house only to go play trivia/drink with friends.

However, in an amusing development, a patron at my library who just picked up a few holds on a rather dark subject left us with the phrase "take it easy," so that was fun.

Faintly Macabre

Ooh, since we're making this a Wednesday Open Thread, I can ask a time-sensitive question! I think I've talked about this before, but it has been dragging on.

So over a month ago, after talking a bit, a substitute teacher at one of my schools asked for my number and proposed meeting up. I gave him my email address. Two weeks go by, nothing, I don't particularly care. (He seemed nice enough, but I wasn't really attracted to him.) Then he emails and asks how I am, what I like to do, when I'm free, etc. I say I'm not around for about 2 weeks because I'm sick and one of my parents is about to come stay for a week and a half. No reply.

Just now, a day after the end of the date range I'd told him I'd be around, he emails me with more general chit-chat and hoping we can meet up soon.

Can I just...not reply? I worked up a little bit of enthusiasm when he first asked me out, but this is starting to get annoying. And since I initially talked myself into going out with him by thinking, he seems nice and is interested, him only remembering to contact me after 2 weeks each time seems like either unenthusiasm or games-playing.

ms. alex

@Faintly Macabre I feel good about ignoring him. He started it!
Of course, I was really never much of a dater, so I don't know how this stuff is supposed to go...

Faintly Macabre

@ms. alex Ha, neither am I, which is probably why my first impulse is always AAAHHH RUN/GO AWAY!!

frumious bandersnatch

@Faintly Macabre Ugh dealing with social obligations you're not really into. I'd probably respond politely like "Sorry, timing's not great--really busy again! Hope you're doing well." Not asking any questions, not offering a new time. I feel like that is a pretty good "nah dawg" answer. But you also don't have any obligation to him, and he's been so bad about emailing that I don't think he could be offended/you should feel bad about you not responding. I just know I'd probably be more awkward if I ran into him again having not responded, and would end up being more enthusiastic about seeing him to make up for having been maybe rude, even though that's absurd.

I basically plan my actions to avoid seeing anyone new, ever, though. So. Good luck!

phillystout

I've been procrastinating all week on quite a few important taks that should have been taken care of a while ago. My tendency to procrastinate to the point of affecting my quality of life was somewhat par-for-the-course when I fully embodied the stoner/skater lifestyle from high school through my early/mid-twenties, but it's not so cute now that I'm 31.

The most obnoxious thing about it is that I've put way more thought energy into either justifying the procrastination or mentally berating myself for it than I would have spent just detaching from this midset and getting stuff done. Case in point: I've spent several hours over the past few days reading about anti-procrastination methods, but haven't applied any of this knowledge to actually tackling my responsibilities. But, I did come across some really insightful worksheets that might help in the long run (they remind me of some cognitive-behavioral worksheets I did with a therapist a few years back.) Here's a link if anyone's interested.

adorable-eggplant

@phillystout Thanks! These look super helpful (I opened your link in a new tab, to read later, so clearly I have a wee bit of a procrastination problem myself also).

What I've found helpful is lowering the bar by a lot. Like I did laundry today, so I do not also have to do dishes (except I will do dishes tomorrow: don't judge me clean people!) and then I'm often pleasantly surprised at how much I got done and then am also able to let myself off the hook for the rest of the day without going into the shame spiral of procrastination. For instance, my bill paying day at the beginning of the month used to be my least favorite day, but now it's like my favorite because ~2min to write a check = free to be a guilt-free bum for the other 23hrs and 58 min of the day.

phillystout

@adorable-eggplant Yes - lowering the bar definitely helps, especially when it feels like 95% of the battle is just getting started! Just banged out a few followup emails that really needed to be sent, and cleaned off the kitchen table so I can get a bunch of paperwork out of the way before dinner. Time to celebrate with a beer!

Cawendaw

@phillystout I bought an audiobook called "The Now Habit" that I was told would give me some understanding of procrastination and tools to cut down on it, but I keep putting off listening to it. I really, really wish that was a joke.

adorable-eggplant

@Cawendaw I read that as "The Now Hobbit" which I would totally read... someday.

melmuu

I wonder where Carolita Johnson has been? I like her posts.

melmuu

@melmuu Maybe the not having Carolita Johnson posts lately is just one of the technical difficulties!

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

@melmuu I posted something similar in the open thread a couple of weeks ago and was informed that she is likely working on a book. Which is exciting! But I definitely miss her.

sophia_h

My week can be summed up by the fact that I now know prune juice is exactly as bad as commonly believed. God, I miss my 20s when I had few to no health problems. It makes me feel like the oldest lady on earth.

adorable-eggplant

@sophia_h But prune bread is tasty! Although searching for a recipe to share made me feel like an old lady, because they're call things like "Grandma's Prune Bread" and whatnot. But don't let that deter you: it's tasty.

Also, just plain eating prunes was/is less gross in my opinion that the juice form, if that's an option for you.

sophia_h

@adorable-eggplant Hm, maybe I'll try that, since so far my experience has been "this tastes like drinking dates, except way more syrupy and somehow bitter."

CinnamonSwirls

@sophia_h
If it helps, just think of them as "dried plums" which is what I see them called on all packaging and signage now. And then you are drinking "plum juice"

Living My Best Life Far Away from the Hairpin!

@sophia_h Gross, yeah, prune juice has always sounded completely foul to me but I actually love *eating* prunes. I'm seconding the recommendation to actually eat the suckers (if possible for you)! I usually eat them by themselves, but they're good chopped up and thrown into oatmeal (with all your other standard oatmeal fixins) too.

ms. alex

@sophia_h Plum juice, if it is an acceptable alternative for your needs, tastes much, much better than prune juice.

sandwiches

@sophia_h Prune brownies! I swear to FSM, you won't even notice the prunes are there - my mom basically raised us on prune brownies.

Diana

Tonight I move back home with my parents for the next month. I'm dealing with it because I got a sublet arranged for April, but I'm still really sad and frustrated. I need somebody to tell me that I WILL get a decent ob in San Francisco and be able to move back. It's not the money that concerns me, I've managed to make it here since October making a laughably small income, if I can just get a decent job I'll be able to swing moving back. But I really need somebody to tell me that it can be done and it won't take another age. My family is very very depressing to be around and I'm worried about getting sucked into a depressive spiral while I'm back.

taco-salad dot com

@Diana I went through a similar thing a couple years ago after unexpectedly losing my job. I had an apartment for a few more months that sucked up most of my savings, and couldn't afford not to move home when the lease ended. I was grateful to have a family who'd take me back in and who totally meant well... but being around them too much for too long is really taxing. Luckily I did find a good job and a good apartment (still in both!) without too much permanent damage to my sanity ;) I was in and out after about 4 months altogether. Look on the bright side, at least you know your time there is limited! In the meantime just try to get out of the house as much as possible. Spend time with friends, do your job hunting at the library, or even get a part-time job to keep busy. Sounds like you may already have one but it's also good for showing continuous employment on a resume. Anyway, just wanted to say I've been there and it turned out okay. Good luck!

frumious bandersnatch

@Diana You will get a decent job in SF and you will make it work! I moved here without an apartment or a job (but savings, thankfully) and spent and spent and then I finally found a great version of both! And it's one of the best places to be looking for a job, even though it's still shitty. And it's such a great city! I know sometimes hearing success stories can make you feel like "ughhhh errybody but me" BUT I really think it's a welcoming city to winging it, despite the cost of living and how hard it is to find an apartment.

It makes much more sense to move home for a bit instead of spiraling into debt/homelessness. You're doing the right thing for yourself and it's not forever. So give yourself a high five instead of a depression!

Diana

@frumious bandersnatch @faceifer

THANKS to you both. It really helps to hear this, even from Internet strangers! I'll keep my head up.

Prostitute Robot From The Future
meetapossum

@Prostitute Robot From The Future I'm glad that was exactly what I hoped it would be. And that was before I noticed your username/picture!

Millwall, Millwall, you're really dreadful and your girlfriends are unfulfilled and alienated.

Prostitute Robot From The Future

@meetapossum Gawd, I love that bit. I love all the bits.

Faintly Macabre

@Prostitute Robot From The Future I found one of those shiatsu machines at a thrift store last year and almost bought it! But I was too scared.

I also bought some lavender oil and can't use it because whenever I look at it, I can't stop thinking, "Add a drop of lavender to your milk."

Prostitute Robot From The Future

@Faintly Macabre OMG! Such a missed opportunity, though. You could've made al these prostitut-robot-from-the-future-pics!

And I can't make toast with jam, without singing "jamjamjam".

Cawendaw

@Prostitute Robot From The Future Ohhhh, is that what it's from? Whenever I read your username I was picturing Arnold Schwarzenegger (as the Terminator) walking into Pretty Woman, grabbing Richard Gere and telling him "Live with me if you want to come."

Prostitute Robot From The Future

@Cawendaw I think this bit of mental imagery was a very meaningful contribution to society.

ETA: Also very clever for three raccoons.

Cawendaw

@Prostitute Robot From The Future *gasp* someone read that! <3

Cawendaw

Last Wednesday, a friend offered me what is basically my perfect job working under her and sent me a pretty straightforward assignment as an audition. So for the last week I've been agonizing over it, becoming less and less functional until I by Monday I was nauseous and panicked and unable to concentrate or basically do anything but sleep (16+ hours a day! yay stress!) and go to the bathroom. So I just e-mailed her that I wasn't comfortable having a friend as a supervisor but thank you for the opportunity blah blah. And now I'm magically able to process words and microwave things! So... looking up, I guess?

Cawendaw

@Cawendaw Oh, except that I still don't have a job and am making no meaningful contribution to society and am a leech.

frumious bandersnatch

Everything is terrible. On the plus side, I just accidentally typed "thehairpun.com" into the address bar, and puns are so great that just THINKING about them makes me happy.

So I dunno--make me some puns?

Cawendaw

@frumious bandersnatch Guy walks into an address bar. "Hi Earl!" Says the bartender, "How's the colon?"

frumious bandersnatch

@Cawendaw bahahha. I actually snorted. *bandersnatch obsessively refreshes this page the rest of the day hoping for MOAR PUNZ*

Prostitute Robot From The Future

@frumious bandersnatch Dammit! Edit, not delete.

Cawendaw

@frumious bandersnatch You did see the "Who's on first" post, which is all puns, right? Also, this is my favorite modern riff on the concept: http://loadingreadyrun.com/videos/view/214/Its-Very-Simple

thebestjasmine

I have a terrible cold and feel gross today, and am typing this from my gross sickbed. On the plus side, I had the foresight to go buy lots of cold medicine and those tissues with the lotion in them last night, but then that's mostly because last time I got a terrible cold I didn't take much cold medicine because I usually don't, and then got a terrible ear infection which lasted a month and gave me vertigo. So now I'm taking meds every four hours and am paranoid at every bit of fluid I feel in my ears.

charlottecat

My week has been up and down? But right now it's at a low point because I have so much WORK (college...) due tomorrow and it is so hard to sit and make myself do it. Also I randomly decided I needed a profile picture. It will probably change a lot for the next 24 hours...

charlottecat

@charlottecat Except now it won't let me change it.

the ghost of amy lee

@charlottecat the one I see is really cute. good luck with your work!

charlottecat

@the ghost of amy lee It apparently did change. Yess... Thanks.

the ghost of amy lee

I've been feeling really weird about things lately. Like, alternately giddy and happy because my relationship opened back up (well, it never really closed, but we have been seeking other partners), and I've been sleeping with my boss (hot on a few levels), but he is moving really soon so then I get all sad and freak out. But like, I know I can find other people, it's just hard to convince myself that anyone would even be interested.

lucy snowe

I decided to break up with my therapist.

Now I need to find a new therapist. A prospect which makes me feel tired.

1971576878@twitter

I just thought it may be an idea to post incase anyone else was having problems researching but I am a little unsure if I am allowed to put names and addresses on here.
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