Tuesday, March 5, 2013


Farewell, Jane

Please join me in wishing farewell to Jane Marie, who is moving on from The Hairpin. It's been a pleasure and ridiculously fun to work with her, especially because it's rarely felt like work. And although it's hard (/impossible) to pick such a brief selection, I'd like to highlight a few favorite pieces:

What It's Like to Get a Biopsy

I'm Changing My Name, Again

Women Struggling to Drink Water

How to Use the Internet

The Best Time I Occupied Wall Street

- And her lovely tribute to David Rakoff

(She's also really good at creating imaginary vacations and actual gorgeous events.)

And I imagine I'm not the only one who regularly replays her beauty tutorial videos to both get better at the things she's teaching (personal favorites include Cat EyeBig Hair, and '50s Glamour) and to pretend she's in the room with me. Here's the whole backlog. (Plus all her excellent and hilarious Beauty Q&A columns.) Thank you, Jane.

You can also keep up with Jane Marie on Twitter, on Instagram, and via her website.


jane marie

173 Comments / Post A Comment




@dotcommie Oh my God. Is she going to XOVain? D:


@wee_ramekin oh I hope not, especially after all the mean things we said, but it could be great, like one of those movies where a tough teacher gets sent to the worst school in the worst town and TURNS IT ALL AROUND. with tough talk and tough dancing.


@queenofbithynia I love you forever for this perfect tribute. Vietnam Itinerary

honey cowl






Nicole Cliffe

She'd a smooth, wrinkle-free forehead, a bunch of lace at her chin,
A coat of the claret velvet, and a jumpsuit of brown doe-skin;
They fitted with never a wrinkle: her boots were up to the thigh.
And she wrote with with a jeweled twinkle,
Her earrings a-twinkle,
Her thick-lashed eyes a-twinkle, under the jeweled sky.

But oh! How we will miss her.
The Hairpin's thick-lashed editor,
Jane, The Hairpin's beauty editor,
Plaiting a dark red love-knot into her long black hair.




@Nicole Cliffe I love you forever for this perfect tribute.


@Nicole Cliffe It's made that much more sad/meaningful when sung to the tune of Loreena McKennit's Highwayman song.

Lee Van Queef

:( Bye, Jane. You were the only person who could convince me that wearing eyeliner is not just nice in theory, but actually possible.


@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas I KNOW! I put on dark-dark black eyeliner on this weekend and it looked great! I am thinking about getting false eyelashes! It's all Jane!


@muddgirl THIS. Also, learning of the magic of make-up base, to make all the magical stuff stay on. ALL HAIL JANE!

Nicole Cliffe

<3 u forever, Jane-ie.

Jolie Kerr

@Nicole Cliffe Oh damn it, Nicole. Now I'm sobbing.



I clicked through to this from Twitter, assuming she was heading for maternity leave! I'll miss you, Jane Marie.




@allofthewine from her website, "As co-editor and resident beauty expert at TheHairpin.com, Jane Marie's "How to Be a Girl" series and makeup tutorials will teach you just that. Look for the coffee table book soon."



But who will scour the internet for antelope benches on sale, and try to convince us that we'd totally look good in those stupid Hammer pants too? These are genuinely sad questions.


@iceberg also, she goes and gets knocked up with ONLY ONE BABY and abandons us? Tsk tsk young lady.


@iceberg Set the bar high, mama.


Farewell Jane! Farewell Bins of Bargains and Being a Girl! I feel dowdier with every passing minute.


fondue with cheddar

@thisisunclear I was already dowdy despite having Jane in my life! I am dooooooomed.

Judith Slutler

oh no! We'll miss you Jane!


I could weep and fuss and rend my garments—and I shall, in due time—but for now, I'll just say thank you, Jane, for a very fun, very memorable, inimitably readable tenure. May the keyboard rise to meet you.


@Emby Aw, this is the best farewell. Good luck, Jane. Keep in touch!

does it need saying

@Emby You have said it better than I am able. ^This, Jane^


I am decidedly Not OK with this. Jaaaaaaane teach me your Beauty Ways!

I guess I can settle for quietly following you on Twitter and rewatching your archived videos when I need a refresher on how to use eyeliner. And also reviewing your wedding photos when I need Pinterest inspirations.

<3 u Jane


@antipretty OH MY GOD this means the end of the Friday Bargain Bin?!?!?!?!?!

brb committing sepukku

Daisy Razor

Jane, you taught me how to put on false eyelashes without poking myself in the eye. For that, I will be forever grateful.

I'll miss you bunches. Please, please come back occasionally and write about useful and glamorous baby clothing & products.

Yankee Peach

But But But Friday Bargain Bin! Oh Jane Marie, we hardly knew ye. *sniff*



Dirty Hands


But where can I find her now? Will Jane be hiding from the internet or just not in our neighborhood?


@Dirty Hands Indeed! Her website says nothing about it, tragically.


I am too sad but I'll try and do this the right way: Thank you, Jane Marie! You are awesome and will kick ass in whatever it is that you're doing next. <3



I hope there are wonderful things in your future,


I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

Jane! You taught me things about makeup and will not forget them! Also, you showed me that flying Virgin Airlines might be hilarious and fun, and you made me laugh forever and ever amen with the women struggling to drink water.

Many thanks, happy trails!


JANE! You will be missed! :(

And also, best of luck and many thank yous for brightening up our days (and complexions).

Tuna Surprise

Going to pour out a water bottle all over my breasts as a tribute! Vaya con Dios!


Your delightful sense of humor and OCEANS of beauty advice/skillful tips will be extremely missed. Please don't be an Internet Stranger!

(and congratulations! Babies are awesome!)




@j-i-a I feel very Mr. Rochester about this too! :(



@crisisalert Why must I have eyes to see you're not there? :(

Pocket Witch

Jaaaaaaaane! I love you!


Thanks Jane! Keep in touch and best wishes for your future!


Jane you are so lovely! Please tell us you are going to be publishing fabulous Jane-things somewhere so we can get a regular Jane-fix!


Jannnnnnne, we will miss you so much! I think of you whenever I do my hair.


Today is the worst day! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITHOUT FRIDAY BARGAIN BIN? I can't surf Outnet BY MYSELF.


@chrysopoeia : RIGHT? Jesus, we can't be expected to shop ALONE, what the HELL. Are we going to have to do our own reader-created ersatz Bargain Bin / support group?

Which, I'm down with that, but NOOOOO, JAAAAANE.


But-but-but ...




Jane, you are wonderful and will be sorely missed.

Edith, I have five years of experience in online journalism, and I know literally all the things there are to know about mascara, sunscreen, diet and exercise, and being an obsessive Hairpin fan (among other topics). Caaaaaall meeeeeeeee!


Awww. Friday Bargain Bins.

As someone who never wears make-up, I still really enjoyed/appreciated the Beauty Q&As

fondue with cheddar

@pajamaralls Me too! I was always like, "Why am I even reading this?" But I read them anyway because they were so entertaining.


@fondue with cheddar I know, right?!

With the added feeling of "If I ever start wearing make-up, I'll know how to avoid looking like a tragic mess."

fondue with cheddar

@pajamaralls Yes! I always assume that someday I will change and start being girlier (I sort of try sometimes). I don't know if it will ever happen, but if it does I will surely lean heavily on Jane's advice and tutorials.




I felt a great disturbance in The Hairpin...


@Norrey ...as if a million Pinners suddenly posted in terror, and were suddenly silenced.


Awwww, noooo! You can't move on! NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO MOVE ON. We must all stay here and try on each other's blush and talk smack about those tubing mascaras FOREVER.


@collier God I fucking hate tubing mascaras

lasso tabasco

Jane, we love you!!! Don't be a stranger, I hope :((((((((


I registered JUST so I could say:



But where can I follow Jane to?!??! I'm not ready for this to be the ennnnnnnd!


Jane. What r u doing. JANE. STAHP.

Lily Rowan

Aw, Jane! All the best in your future endeavors......


But what of Gary and Elaine?! What will become of them?? JANE. SOB.


@frigwiggin OH NOOOOOO!!!! I'm legitimately heartbroken.


@frigwiggin Oh no I didn't even think of that! Noooooo


Nooooo I knew it!


@bunB I hope you are actually Bun B because that would be amazing. (don't confirm or deny, Imma just keep this image in my head)


Jane, thanks for making the Hairpin great. It won't be the same without you.


I already miss you.


(an unoriginal sentiment, but I feel it acutely)


Thanks so much, Jane, you brought so much beauty in many many forms to the 'Pin. Best of luck with your next endeavors, and please pop back at least once for an update on your happy baby joy!


Jane, you introduced me to NARS tinted moisturizer and Lancome lipstick in Corset, and for that I'm forever in your debt. Don't be a stranger now, y'hear?


I've been dreading this day... there's nary been a hairpin word out of Jane Marie's mouth for the past fortnight! My soul weeps!

V. excited for Jane and her future, v. sad for the hairpin and myself!


@mariko I know. I noticed the lack of Jane and knew this was coming. Dammit. I'll miss her.

the upstairs girl who frowns at the piano

Noooooooo! My precious Friday Bargain Bin. ;________; Best wishes in your new adventures, Jane, you will be greatly missed!


What bummers. Jane's beauty column is one of my favorites anywhere. Hope to find her writing again online soon!


Springbok benches forever.

Jolie Kerr

I'm phone pecking on my way to LAX so forgive any typos.

Janie, thank you for everything you've done for me - as a friend, editor and colleague. You are a tremendous woman and I've been blessed to work with you but more importantly to celebrate all the things we have shared in the past two years: book proposal agony followed by book deal ecstasy and engagements and wedding dress shopping and a wedding and a bebeh on the way.

Thank you for being my friend, and for teaching me how to varnish my nails. I love you from the bottom of my <3.

Jolie Kerr

(And now I'm going to go cry. Cleanly, but still.)


Jane, thank you for all you've contributed to the 'Pin. You're an integral part of the culture here, and you'll be sorely missed.

Good luck in all your future endeavors, and good luck with the rest of your pregnancy!


Well, that's a gutpunch. I and my icon salute you, Jane. While I have not yet mastered the cat-eye, hope springs infernal. Maybe I'll get it after watching your video one. more. time.



(well, maybe just a little bit but I won't enjoy it!)


@parallel-lines I read that to the tune of "Careless Whisper." Truly, we will never bargain shop again the way we shopped with Jaaaaaaaaaaaaane. *saxophone*

paper bag princess

NOOOOOOO!!! Who is going to teach me how to put on makeup now?? I feel like you are my big sister. I've learned a lot from your videos and tutorials and you make feeling pretty and confident look easy. I hope you will keep writing things that we can read somewhere!


Oh, oh no. I saw everyone's panicked comments here or there (WHERE'S JANE BTW) but had been uncharacteristically not worried. I guess there was reason!

Jane, you will be missed <3


That is one lucky bambino.


Is it conincidence that the eye logo perfectly matches the Sephora ads for green eye shadow running directly above it? It's like they knew!


I'm going to just send random messages to my fellow hairpin friends that read "JANE!" in memory now.

This is just the saddest, but I assume amazing things are lined up, so best of luck!


Are you even allowed to do that? I don't think that's allowed. You can't just get up and walk out of here!


OH NO WE WILL MISS YOU for reeeeelz.


@gobblegirl Also congratulations on procuring a baby. They seem fun.


nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo jane! We will miss you so!


Awww I was wondering why there had been no Jane posts lately. I'm sorry to see you're leaving Jane! :(

Veronica Mars is smarter than me


Even though I'm hardly on here anymore, my life will be emptier without Jane's posts.

<3 u Jane-ie. Here's me wishing you all the best in your future endeavors. You are awesome and will surely continue to do awesome things!

Johanna Schwartz@twitter

I had an amazing time with Jane in Calgary last summer showing her around the Calgary Folk Music Festival. Bet of luck in your new adventures!!

Esther C. Werdiger

Goodbye, Jane! xo

Jennifer Culp

JAAAAAAAAAAANE!! I love you, and your work on The Hairpin has enriched my life. I'll miss seeing you around here, and I wish you the best in whatever comes next!


But...I sincerely need help Being a Girl! And, especially, Being a Pregnant Lady Who Wears Clothes! Guess Twitter will have to do. Thank you, and good luck on the next thing!

This is my new username

JANE! NO!!! I refuse to accept this!!


FAREWELL JANE! All the best forever and ever I miss you so bad already

polka dots vs stripes

Joining the choruses of good luck and I'll miss you, Jane!

Briony Fields

Jane: I love you forever. Good luck with whatever is next! I will totally follow you wherever you go. (Erm, internetly speaking, not irl. Obvs.)

Also, I clicked on that 'changing my name' post and I want you all to know that I just cried laughing ON THE TRAIN at Anita Poupon.

Allison Donnell@facebook

oh noes!! How will I learn to be a lady now??? Miss you and best of luck...maybe you can come back and visit once in a while?


Awww. Best of luck!


Aww, I'll miss you, Jane! Good luck, wherever you're going! You will be missed.


But... what about Mascarapedia Volume II?

Miss Maszkerádi

Godspeed dear Jane Marie! Thanks for everything (and thanks Edith for the convenient arranging of her collected works here, I'll have an enjoyable evening with those.)


nooooooooooo!!! WE WILL MISS YOU!
Also, now who will I send the hilarious photos I took of myself last weekend with the intent of sending them to you for help with the question: "what can I do to my eyes to make it so I don't look stoned in every picture ever?"
Congrats on the bambino and any other fun new adventures! Can you and Nicole and Iceberg start a mommyblog? Please? my baby is a few weeks older than Nicole's, and I know I'd read the shit out of that mommyblog.


It's amazing how much one stranger on the internet has enriched my life. But I knew it couldn't last forever! New adventures always beckon. Good luck! And thanks!


Jane! Thank you for being so thoroughly lovely, always.

Best of luck, I will miss you lots, etc.


No! Jane, you are my favorite! I get giddy when I hear old This American Life shows and you're mentioned. Thank you for all the make up advice and life advice in general, Fridays just won't be the same without Bargin Bin. Please let us know where you're heading next, we will follow!


Omg I just read the biopsy story. I wasn't a hairpin reader in 2011, so I missed it when I was published. I'm going through something really similar! And my boyfriend also left me in the early stages of the process because I wasn't "going with the flow." Thank you, Jane, for writing that. It was amazing.


Aww, no :( Goodbye and good luck, Jane!!


:( :( :( We'll miss you Jane!

I remember how thrilled I was the day she posted to announce she was the new co-editor. My friend and I were texting back and forth about how happy we were!


no!!!!!!! come back come back i'll start clicking on more ads on the hairpin so edith can bribe you to stay?!

I Want To Go To There


Pound of Salt

Unexpected hole in the heart!!!!




@WILLOWW they already have a Jane, why must they take ours?


NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Jane, I wear false eyelashes ALL THE TIME because of you. And wish I could wear teal eyeshadow even though it looks stupid on me because of you! And believe in wild prints and teased hair because of you!

You will be so missed.


But the hairpin is going to cross post every time Jane does anything anywhere else, right? Right??


@highfivesforall Yes please that would be the best.

belle o.@twitter

:( Friday Bargain Bin was seriously my most favorite thing on the internet aside from cats. But I still love you anyways, jane marie. <333

The Hyperbolic Julia Set

This is so sad for us but it seems you are moving on to lovely things. Good luck with all your future endeavors!


Jane, you're fantastic. Thanks so much for all your work here, and the very very very best of luck for everything in your future. I'll miss you!


Guess I have to go back to being a boy.


Nooooo! Jane, I talk about you all the time!! D:


Waaaaaah!! She put plus-sized clothes in the Friday Bargain Bins and made me love her and now she's gone.... I can't go on.

Hot Doom

JAAAAAAAAAAAANE! SO sorry that you're leaving The Hairpin - your columns are what brought me here in the first place a couple years ago, and your posts have always been a highlight of reading this website. Best of wishes and luck in your new endeavors, and thanks for all the amazing beauty guidance!


Please don't go! We'll eat you up! We love you so!

(Thanks for everything, Jane. Come back and visit sometime?)

one cow.

I'm sitting here wearing BB cream, foundation, and highlighter all because of Jane Marie. (And other stuff, I'm not naked). But in the last 2 years, I think all of my beauty purchases have been Hairpin-influenced. Thank you, Jane! I still re-watch your eyelash & hair curling tutorials for fun. You'll be missed.


Jane! Thanks for all the advice. We will miss you like crazy people.

I hope there will still be beauty content on the Hairpin! Jane's columns were some of my favorites. Maybe rotating, ask-a-lady style? If so, I volunteer to be Ask A Make-up Loving Hippie Lady.


Oh no! Jane is the reason I realized I don't really look silly in bright lipstick! I'll miss her articles, they are ALWAYS entertaining :(


Bargain Bin 4 EVAR!
Janie, I will miss that the most even though I haven't agreed with every fashion choice (though secretly I think that's just 'coz you rock it better than me).

in conclusion: XOJane. XO


I can't live without Bargain Bin. It's not going to happen. As a frequent internet shopper with an eye for the cheap and stylish with never a plan for Thursday nights (are the networks even trying anymore?) I hereby step-up and volunteer to be a replacement bargain finder. I'm not sure if I am witty enough to fill Jane's shoes, but dammit I can browse Anthro, West Elm and Asos like no one's business.




Jaaaaaane! I had almost figured out how to be a girl! I'm sure one more (ten thousand more) tutorials would get me there.....
Sigh. I hope that whatever your new adventures are that they go well!




Oh, Jane. *sigh* I'm happy for you, going on to bigger and babier things, but feeling sorry for myself and all the rest of the Pinners. But especially myself. Thanks for everything and all the best.

straw hat

Thank you, Jane Marie, for everything you've shared with us here. You will be missed. Good luck on your next adventures!


You know, I've never met Jane before, but sometimes I have dreams about her. Not in a weird way, but when I find myself embroiled in a tricky dream-problem, sometimes a sensible, funny, compassionate problem solver will show up and nonchalantly say just the right thing to make the problem seem like a non-issue. I always think of that dream element as a little piece of Jane Marie worming its way into my subconscious. Thanks, Jane! Seriously, thank you.


jane! this is really devastating! your tutorials and sass made me think of you like my internet big sister, even though i have a (lovely and talented) big sister, to whom i sent all your articles, and she agreed: you are a spiritual/internet big sister to us both. we will miss you!

Rookie (not the magazine) (not that there's anything wrong with that)

Jane, I will miss you so much and I love you and I very much appreciate your dedication to answering all of our crazy how-to-be-a-girl questions with thoughtful, detailed answers. You actually kind of made me care about makeup, even though I am the worst at it, and I've learned more from you about this stuff than I have from anyone else I know. (Not even exaggerating.)


Oh, the HORROR!! You got me to try doing my hair and makeup like a Elizabeth Taylor (and I'm Korean!). Please tell me your next endeavor will be as a youtube beauty guru because that would be freakin' awesome. Oh, how I weep with sadness. :`(


Oh but this is so sad! I will miss your wonderful voice on here. Happy trails and may all great things be in your future.


Goodbye Jane Marie!! Thank you for all your wonderful writing, and for being a key player in starting this whole site to begin with. This is cheesy but I actually took style points from you and felt more... confident? You tell great stories too.

Best of luck with everything :D


Awww! Thanks for all of your work here. Looking forward to seeing what you do next. I hope you'll occasionally make an appearance here, for old times' sake.


Jane! Dammit! Wish I had commented sooner, but for what it's worth, good luck, girl, it won't be the same here without you :\ (please tell me you'll still be around somewhere to explain make-up to me)


Sweetest of Janes, say it ain't so! Best of luck in all future endeavors...I hope at least of few of them will be shared with the internets.


Why?? Jane all the best so sad you are leaving the Hairpin. :( Best of luck in the future. I can guess why you are leaving but it is still unexpected. I don't comment very often on hairpin anymore, but I will really miss bargain bin, and how to be a girl, you have a really unique voice on this blog and I will miss you so much!


I love this outpouring of love for Jane.

It's crazy that I share this imaginary best friend with so many other people. Why the hell isn't she household name famous??

Jane, I'm not kidding, when I raise my own daughter, you will be a goalpost. You're the perfect kind of perfect. You'll be missed. Thank you, good luck, be happy, and come back.


...Is she going to say goodbye?


There are a lot of things I like about the Hairpin, but Jane's posts are my absolute favorites. I love the friday bargain bin even if I would never consider anything in it--its so fun. I LOVE the beauty Q&A, and Jane's makeup videos were the best...and I watch a lot of makeup videos.


Jane! You are so wonderful to have brought your writing and beauty advice into our lives. I hope your next adventure is chockablock with awesome. (Please have lots of beautiful little babies, says my grandma.) (j/k it's just me, sounding like Memaw.)


Thank you, Jane Marie, for everything you've shared with us here. You will be missed. Good luck on your next adventures! long tan nui dat day tours


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