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Wednesday, February 13, 2013

63

Video Game Valentines

Previously: "Vergil turned up in an unfortunate pair of shiny pants"

Jennifer Culp 's you.

63 Comments / Post A Comment

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

NO PONG VALENTINE?

laurel

skdfjsalkdfjsldj I'm failing to post an image, but here's a link.

Rock and Roll Ken Doll

@laurel
Haha, awesome!

laurel

valenpong

Oh hey, I figured it out.

fondue with cheddar

I LOVE THIS

TheBourneApproximation

@fondue with cheddar

Hairpin provides me with Garrus and Fenris and Skyrim valentines.

Hairpin is therefore best website.

fondue with cheddar

@TheBourneApproximation You are correct.

Princess Slaya

Garrus Vakarian has calibrated my heart to maximum efficiency.

TheBourneApproximation

@Princess Slaya

Scoped and dropped. <3

DianaPrince

No man can give you the brush off as sexily as Brynjolf.

Megasus

@DianaPrince OMG I KNOOOOOOOW

HMSBeagle

@DianaPrince Why isn't he a marriage option???

DianaPrince

@hyaluronan Seriously. I will live all alone in my seven houses forever. If I can't have Brynjolf, I won't have anyone.

HMSBeagle

@DianaPrince I settled for Farkas because he seemed so damn sweet. It was a pity marriage.

Danzig!

@hyaluronan better to marry Aela the Huntress, she is NEVER HAPPY WITH ANYTHING

RK Fire

Companion cube!! <3 <3 <3

Cawendaw

I didn't used to love you. Then I took an arrow in the knee.

(I'M SORRY)

thatgirl

The last one has me a little full of feelings...

JanieS

@thatgirl Can you tell me what game it's from, because it's gorgeous.

frigwiggin

@thatgirl Yes, the Journey one made my heart spasm! That game is just so...ahhhhhh.

Inkling

@JanieS
"Other players on the same journey can be discovered, one at a time, along the way; two players that meet can assist each other, but they cannot communicate via speech or text and cannot see each other's names. The only form of communication between the two is a wordless shout."

*sniffle*

fondue with cheddar

Aww...I want a Varric Valentine!

Jennifer Culp

@fondue with cheddar I am still so mad about not being able to hook up with Varric in DA2.

fondue with cheddar

@Jennifer Culp Me too! I'm normally not into dwarves or blonds or chest hair, but DAMN.

cheerybeggar

@Jennifer Culp Yes, clearly the most attractive man in DA2, and there I am, stuck with the terrorist cat fancier.

fondue with cheddar

@cheerybeggar Yeah, I wasn't so into Anders, even before the "incident". I liked the elves best. Fenris was fun to romance with my mage character, and Merrill was totally adorable.

TheBourneApproximation

@Jennifer Culp

Varric stats:
- Ranged weapon expert.
- Great voice.
- Wry sense of humor.
- Most loyal companion.
- Two syllable name containing "arr"

Conclusion: Varric = Garrus reincarnated in Dwarven form!!

Maladydee

@fondue with cheddar clearly they need to include Varric in DA3 an make him romanceable. I mean, a girl can dream. The only truly funny guy on the team, and he's married to his crossbow. What a waste.

fondue with cheddar

@Maladydee I would happily share the bed with his crossbow if it means having him. I'm sure we could find some kinky uses for it.

fondue with cheddar

I'm sorry, Varric. I'm sure we could find some kinky uses for her.

Nicole Cliffe

This is perfect.

The Mayor of Bethville

I feel like you made that Conker one just for me.

JanieS

@Jennifer Culp Clearly far too obvious for me to figure out! :)

Scandyhoovian

I love you, Garrus Vakarian.

I'm still mad you can't marry Brynjolf. I wanted so badly to have him go, "Is that an amulet of Mara?" at me.

FENRIS <3 Honestly, it's the voice acting that does it for me every time. I love Fenris because I love his voice, and same with Garrus. I love Brynjolf because, um, hello, accents.

This list is only missing one thing to be perfection for me, and that is Carth Onasi, my one true video game boyfriend. CARTH FOREVER.

Jennifer Culp

@Scandyhoovian Yes! CARTH FOREVER AND EVER. I cried when he briefly showed up in KOTOR II to tell me he would love my Revan forever.

TheBourneApproximation

@Scandyhoovian Fenris = most unexpectedly sexy manly voice EVER.

HMSBeagle

@Scandyhoovian Oh I just said the same thing upstream. I wanted to marry Brynjolf but I settled. I settled so hard.

Scandyhoovian

@hyaluronan Who did you settle for? I am still too upset about this to consider wearing my Amulet of Mara anywhere in Skyrim, so...

In my first playthrough I married the dumber of the Farkas/Vilkas twins, I can't keep them straight for the life of me. WHICH WOLF TWIN ARE YOU I CAN'T just give me my homecooked meal goddamnit

@Jennifer Culp YES!!! KOTOR II broke my heart a little with how they let him cameo just to show you how great he is. I LOVE YOU CARTH!!

HMSBeagle

@Scandyhoovian Same! Farkas! I instantly regretted my choice. Alas, Brynholf was too busy for me.

Scandyhoovian

@hyaluronan Yeah I just left him in my house in Windhelm and didn't really bother visiting him terribly often. Alas.

fondue with cheddar

@Scandyhoovian It was so exciting/disappointing to walk around Skyrim and hear a random guard with Fenris' voice. WHY CAN'T YOU COME HOME WITH ME YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A NAME! :(

breccia

VALENTINE uses ARTISANAL SEA SALT CARAMELS AND A NIGHT IN WATCHING MAD MEN! It's super effective!

Megasus

Oh my God my sister is so getting the Fenris one.

iceberg

sending Mario & Peach to Mr Iceberg right nowwww!

iceberg

@iceberg haha oops I meant the Zelda one.

madge

are there katamari valentines? there are!

A. Louise

@madge THANK YOU

RK Fire

Oh, for the love of god, it's absurdly large. Can't stop laughing now..

BornSecular

@madge <3 <3 <3

squishycat

I love *all of these*, even ones for games I hate.

Danzig!

Is it me or is Link not wearing pants there

BornSecular

Ms. Culp, you are my hero.

Gef the Talking Mongoose

I'm sorry, but the fact that the Psychonauts one is the only actual in-game dialogue of the bunch makes it the best.

youresmalltime

i. never. saw this.

<3

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