"The clicks she heard were the bone fragments grinding against one another."
—Whatever, you're probably going to read it. And then wait awhile before trading your Oil of Olay for a high-tech option.
horrors, stick with jane's advice, stem cells
YIKES. I'm sure I've got all kinds of bone fragments grinding against one another but none of them are in my eye.
Still not as traumatic as that infamous Autostraddle article, though.
this is really creative@a
@frigwiggin #enormousscreams #neverstopscreaming #screamingmontagefromtheMuppets
On one hand, science! It works!
On the other, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHH!
Damn it, I have no clue what this article is actually about, but every word in the title and blurb is screaming "NO DON'T READ ME but I'm curious! NO DON'T DO IT!"
@TheBourneApproximation tl;dr (or too horrifying; didn't read) version is that some plastic surgeons were way less careful about an experimental deal than they should have been and accidentally grew a bunch of bone around a woman's eye, which then had to be fixed with more surgery. She is fine now, but still, oh my fucking god.
@wharrgarbl *Runs around in circles, panicking!*
@wharrgarbl She's fine now, "but some living stem cells may linger in her face. These cells could turn into bone or other out-of-place tissues once again."
Thank you for that horror movie tagline, science!
@Cawendaw Living in the Future is going to be incredible, you guys!
@Cawendaw Saw XIXV: Stem Cell Self Surgery Edition
@TARDIStime I laughed so hard, and then spent an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out that Roman numeral.
I'm trying to figure it out now - pretty sure it's a fail! I didn't do well at maths while studying.
I also then tried saying "stem cell self surgery" out loud and... let's just say I've inadvertently created a fun new tongue twister for myself!
@TARDIStime @par_parenthese Clearly, nineteen-five. So, 24?
@The Everpresent Wordsnatcher If that's how Roman Numerals work - I can't remember how they work so I proclaim you the winner!
Sweet merciful Christ. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I spend so much time at my medical research job submitting documentation to the FDA.
Look on the bright side. Oh wait, you can't!
@OhMyGoshYouGuys I see what you did there. Very humerus!
Jesus. Why can't we just come to grips with the fact we're all gonna age? Stop fighting it tooth & nail people, and endangering your well being in the process.
Does the rate of progress in anti aging ever make you wonder what future generations will look like? Even for say our grandchildren who will probably buy stem cells in bodegas. Im freaked out enough now that Gwen Stefani appears to have time travelled from 1995.
Holy poop, I've never been so smug about the fact that I'm too lazy to be vain as I am right now.
I could even finish reading that because it all had the effect of hearing nails ona chalkboard. I'll just be embracing my smile lines over here...
Sometimes I wonder what people in a hundred years are going to look back at this time and roll their eyes at in terms of our complete ignorance in treating the body. I think this article may be a contender.
1. OMFG WHY YIKES SCREAM SHRIEK Etc...
2. The lesson with this woman's eye injection mishap might be used for good... maybe it will get us closer to regrowing bone in accident victims/soldiers? Maybe it will help develop more rigorous testing for newfangled cosmetic procedures? Maybe it'll make vain people slightly less vain? Ok, maybe not the last one.
3. The potential for body modification here is exciting. Horns? Spikes? Both?! Omg... wings??
My first thought = HORNS OMG HORNS OMG
@Inkling I watched a special on a kind of deep-sea eel who has jaw hooks that shoot out of his mouth to pull in prey. Really nifty if you're an eel with no arms. Or if you like to text, scratch and eat a sandwich all at once. Jaw hooks! Lets go!
This actually freaked me out so much I stopped reading after a few paragraphs... UGH UGH UGH UGH WHYYYYY.
AHHHHHH! I just had to go google the CC cream I got in my birchbox that I tried this morning because it is called "stem cellular" and OMG AM I GOING TO GROW BONY SCALES ON MY FACE?!?!??!?!
Apparently, they're fruit stem cells, but I will be washing this shit off the minute I get home. NEVER. AGAIN.
@mlle.gateau Maybe you'll grow tiny cherry trees and grape vines from your eyelids!
@ironhoneybee You would always have a healthy snack at hand!
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