Thursday, October 4, 2012


A Secret Wink-Wink at the You-Know-What

Check out this glorious long read about secret societies from Collector's Weekly. If you don't like reading longly, you should at least look at the pictures and covet everything, like this rare, century-old, Masonic cocktail serving tray with inlaid butterfly wings that looks suspiciously like an iPhone. Also, remember The Stonecutters? We do.

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Attach the Stone of Triumph!


is brilliant!!@l


They did make Steve Guttenberg a star.


@katiemcgillicuddy And held back the electric car.

(I was coming here to quote that line! Beat me to it.)


@bitzyboozer Who keeps the metric system down?


@bitzyboozer Ha, it happens, someone beat me to an ABBA joke earlier and it kind of killed me inside.


@katiemcgillicuddy Whatever, I'm going to go join the No Homers club.


@Sorbee Well, I hope you aren't named "Homer" cause I hear Homer Glumplich is already a member, and we all know they only take one.




Oh! Oh! This is where I get to share the fact that my senior year of college, I rented a cheap off-campus apartment in one of those big old brick buildings that takes up like a whole block that had just previously been owned by the masons! The whole building had only 2-3 other apartments that were "renovated" (badly); the rest of the rooms were being redone at the time. Down a bunch of different hallways, was: a ballroom (where the laundry machines were), a theater (the masons took the seats with them, but left the velvet curtains), and A THRONE ROOM. With raised daises and everything! All the furniture was gone, but you could see the outlines where pictures had been all over the walls, and you could still see the imprint of what must have been some really awesome chairs/thrones on the front dais.


@SarahP The door through which I entered the building had a big gilded masonic symbol over it.

Lily Rowan

@SarahP Sure -- that throne room would be where the rituals are done. I was in the Masonic organization for girls, and we totally had our monthly meetings in a room like that, and it was awesome.


@SarahP A lot of masons are giving tours of their lodges in an attempt to become "more open". Everyone should check one out if they get the chance!


@Lily Rowan JD or Rainbow? I still have my cord from JD. I have used it for ...um...unorthodox... purposes since reaching majority.

Lily Rowan

@sony_b Rainbow! What's JD?


@SarahP I wonder how many couples had sex in that abandoned throne room


@Lily Rowan Job's Daughters! I think we were the less strict offshoot for girls? I don't remember the rules anymore, but I think I just had to have a blood relative who was a Mason and the Rainbows had to have a closer relative, so they were more like Eastern Star? We had dances with the De Molay boys. Here's some more info: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Job%27s_Daughters_International


@Lily Rowan And now I just read up on Rainbows and realized it's the opposite - they don't need to be related to Masons. If only I had google when I was 14!

The cord I mentioned was part of our uniform for meetings - it's a six foot length of silk rope with big tassels on it, and we wore these ridiculous toga/choir robe things with the cords stitched down at the collar and then wrapped around the torso and tied at the waist in a square knot. They were very specific about how that knot was to be tied. It was completely goofy.

Lily Rowan

@sony_b INteresting! Yeah, I have no Masonic relatives, but was still a Rainbow Girl. We wore wedding dresses for our meetings -- the rules said long and white, and in this day and age, that meant wedding. So that was hilarious -- all these high school girls in cheap wedding gowns all the time. Also, I was totally DeMolay Sweetheart one year, and still have the tiara! (I was supposed to give it back.)

Now I want to give someone the secret handshake! Because there actually is a secret handshake.

Lily Rowan

@sony_b Ad I finally clicked through to wikipedia, and now I'm jealous of JD! "Honored Queen"!!!! I only got to be "Worthy Advisor."


/performs elaborate handshake


my grandfather was a Mason for something like 70 years, he was very hush-hush about it, though, i know no secrets. he did live until his 97th birthday, though, so maybe there was a secret there.
i do have a lapel pin of his, but i suspect wearing it would be sort of disrespectful.


@karenb My Great-grandpa was a Mason. All the Masons in the community came out to do some sort of ceremony at his funeral. They were all wearing the aprons and other garb. Lots of obscure language and I can't say I know any more about the Masons having seen it.


@karenb My grandmother was a member of some sort of secret organization, I don't remember which. When she found out she was dying, she burned a big box of stuff. There was also a shoe-box of super secret papers that she asked my mother to burn as soon as my grandmother died and to not read any of them. I will never forgive my mother for actually doing that. WHO DOESN'T READ SECRET PAPERS YOU'RE INSTRUCTED BURN WITHOUT READING?! COME ON MOM!


@MilesofMountains oh man, i would be mad, too. you never know what could be in there!


Going to pretend the Odd Fellows were once an unofficial Thieves Guild now!
Also those masks WERE SCARY.


I can't say I entirely understand why someone would have a "fraternal organization" themed wedding when one is not a part of said organizations. It seems kind of weird to me, especially since the reasoning seems to come down to, "the trappings are neat." To each their own, I guess. Though if they're going with that, I think they should take it all the way. Ride into the wedding on goats! Make all attendees wear ceremonial garb! Instead of a wedding cake, each guest should "pluck a cherry from the belly of a fat man wearing a diaper, with their teeth." Okay, never mind, this wedding is going to be magnificent!

Reginal T. Squirge

Needs a "secret societies, tryna keep they eye on me" tag. Or at least a "mobb deep" tag.


Who knew that Shriners were Masons! Not me, that's who.

fondue with cheddar

I thought it WAS an iPhone.

I work at a print shop, and we have several Masonic organizations as clients. We print these code books for them! A little bit of it is readable because all they did was remove some letters and you can totally figure it out with context, but most of it is gobbledygook. I don't know how they work but there's one labeled "1" and one labeled "2" with no instruction. But I want to figure them out so badly!


But who will help the widow's son?


Okay, so I read "Secret wink-wink at the You-know-What" saw the photo and immediately thought the article would refer to female genitalia. Is that a mental freudian slip, on my part?


If you're Catholic like I grew up you also have the Knights of Columbus. I once went to a big service done by the Cardinal at the Basilica in DC that was for Catholic groups--so, girl scouts (me), boy scouts, and like A BILLION OLD DUDES WITH SWORDS AND HELMETS WITH FEATHER MOHAWKS. Completely insane.


I used to sing that Stonecutter song with my brother and sister all the time.

My mum said she worked out that her old boss was a Mason as he kept hiring random men who would be promoted into really high positions despite no obvious experience. She and her friend once locked themselves into his office and read his manual. Apparently they kill those who reveal the secrets by drowning them oooo. And a lot of doctors and lawyers are members.

Mind you, I went to Cambridge which is a little hive of old secret societies, though never stumbled across that many. The Apostles. The Adonians. And the Night Climbers, who climb the colleges at night.

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