"When most Americans talk about good-tasting water, they’re talking about water that tastes like their own spit."
gross, water, drink more water, spit
I prefer my water to taste like fermented corn mash.
@Emby I saw there was 9 comments and knew I was too late to make a similar joke. You win, cheers.
so goddamn brave@y
This is why I collect my saliva throughout the day, so I can use it for the next day's hydration.
so you've decided to drink more saliva
What? How would those work? "Yup, it's water!"
@Daisy Razor The internet on organizing a water tasting: "Make notes if you wish, describing how the water feels (short, long, focused, wide, and so forth). Because the waters vary significantly in mineral content, mouthfeel, and other characteristics, it will be hard to pick a best water." Which proves your point ;-)
It's fun to see how the tap water I grew up with suddenly tastes like something now that I only go home once a year. Different mineral water brands can taste quite different to me at least, though.
@Daisy Razor I could totally be in a water-tasting competition!
Most tap water and most bottled water tastes gross to me—usually metallic or chlorinated or plastic. I can't afford to buy Fiji all the time so I use a Brita filter on my tap water, but I can only drink it ice cold because the warmer it is the more the flavors come out.
The tap water we had when I was little was so bad that I couldn't even drink it through a Brita. We had a well, but I think it had a lot of copper in it from the pipes because it would leave green stains in the tub. Many years later they found mercury in my neighborhood's water, but I don't know if it was in mine or not because the wells went to two different depths and I don't know if mine was at the good level or the bad level. It would explain my memory problems, though.
@Daisy Razor Yep. I work for a water utility...I love the taste of our water, but we never win the competitions. Ground water tastes better than surface water, apparently.
@jen325 I think I could, too. I had to buy a Brita in college because the tap water in Pennsylvania (Pennsyltucky) tasted gross to me (I'm from NJ).
@Daisy Razor I mean, Dasani does taste like straight up rocks off the ground, so water can definitely have taste. ("Fortified with minerals" = "we crushed up some pebbles and made you drink them.") Also, usually when we "taste" our tap water, it's because of residue sloughing off from the pipes more than the actual water.
@Veronica Mars is smarter than me To me, Dasani always tastes like the bottle.
@Daisy Razor "Definitely wet. I get a wet taste from this one!"
@Daisy Razor "Yep, it's... it's water."
I don't know why that bothers me, but ew.
I have never forgotten an anecdote from a first-year communications class: if you spit in a glass and then drink it, most people would be repulsed, despite the fact that it's entirely natural. I am one of those "most people." It grossed me out in 2004, and I'm grossed out anew after remembering it today.
@etheline. I think it's the globular quality of spit that is gross. Sure, it's MY spit, but I generally don't like the idea of drinking something that has a weird clear gloob floating on top.
*screeching brake sound effect*
@sudden but inevitable betrayal DREAM JOB. I ♥ water so, so much. My mom used to bribe me to finish my vegetables with water when I was little.
"Women Struggling to Drink Water" is still my cheer-up page, any time I feel down I can look at it and instantly feel better.
@aliceandstuff Love my cheer-up pages
@aliceandstuff I need to collect cheer up pages, stat. Women Struggling to Drink Water will be right up there.
@thebestjasmine If you are brainstorming cheer up pages, I want in.
For whatever reason, the Calming Manatees that so many people like make me cry, so they're off my list.
Among the variety of reasons I decided to end my lease on my current apartment is the water. It smells and tastes like metal. It leaves stains on things. It is disgusting. I started buying big jugs of water at the grocery store after moving here, after having sworn I would never do that again.
*(I do not live in a rural area, and I know there is probably something wrong with the apartments water softener, but they won't doooooo anything)
@MissMushkila When I lived in London the limey water turned all of my clothes gray. Hurrah!
Did anyone else think about the story in Sideways Stories from Wayside School where Mrs. Jewls makes ice cream that tastes like what each student tastes when they're not tasting anything?
@H.E. Ladypants I didn't, but I sure am now! I loved that book.
@H.E. Ladypants That's what I thought of immediately.
Struggling more after reading that quote. Eurgh.
I have Opinions about water. Seriously, I cannot drink the stuff that comes out of my tap right now (city water), and the only filter that makes it taste ok to me is the fancy ZeroWater one. Bottled spring water? Also nasty. Dasani is my platonic ideal of water. Is there such thing as a water supertaster?
(Actually, my taste issues are probably because the city water I grew up with wins prizes at tastings constantly. I was spoiled!)
@Does Axl have a jack? Dasani is the only bottled water that I cannot drink because it tastes gross to me! Interesting.
@oboe-d-amore Haha, same! It feels like it's drying my mouth out. I'm told it's because of the salts they add for re-mineralizing or whatever, since it's essentially distilled first and distilled water is bad for you.
@oboe-d-amore I second this! Boo Dasani (see upthread)!
@Does Axl have a jack? Dasani is just filtered tap water in a bottle with rocks and salt added. Maybe it's your old tap water?
@Faintly Macabre I would be so, so happy if they bottled my old tap water! Maybe Dasani comes from a very similar water system.
@damselfish Oh no, distilled is bad for you? This is what I drank growing up! We had our own well water, but my dad distilled it. Deliciousness. =-(
So my spit tastes like the cool, delicious water that runs from Mt. Hood to the city of Portland? Because that is the best tap water I have ever had in my life.
Oh god, I had forgotten until now that I'm moving to the land of nasty water! Dammit, I might have to buy a Brita.
That can't be right, because I like the taste of water best when it's ICE COLD.
@Megano! what's cooler than being cool? ICE COLD.
But I hear you--I rate water fountains (not as a professional, but after I drink from one I'll rate it 1-10...weird quirk) and the colder, the higher the rating.
@Megano! @beanie YES and YES.
The pipes have a lot to do with water fountains, though. Some fountains taste really metallic. There was one really cold fountain in my high school (in the art/music wing woo!) and there was always a huge line at it in between classes. It's been 20 years but sometimes I still miss that fountain.
@jen325 Aw, it's like the Chipotle of water fountains.
@beanie Awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite awrite okay now ladies!
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