Tuesday, August 21, 2012


Deadliest Catch, Indeed

How to stay alive at the office: don't use a ladder, don't go on the roof, don't take the stairs, and don't stand on top of a non-moving vehicle. Just stay sitting down and also don't fish.

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But I thought sitting kills you too?


@nyikint Everything kills you


@nyikint Haaaa I totally came here to say that, too!


@The Kendragon

We are all going to get got.

Sarah C.@twitter

@nyikint Me three!


I want to know how you can die from a fall "at the same level" - wouldn't that be...tripping?

all the bacon and eggs

@Ophelia You die of embarrassment.


@all the bacon and eggs Fall on something sharp? Catch your head on a corner? Vat of acid?


As a part of my hideous job, I do a lot of risk assesment at client sites. You would (not be?) surprised at every thing that can kill you.


@OhShesArtsy Once, my brother and I jokingly discussed how each and every individual object in the room we were in could kill us if applied in the right manner. It got really unsettling really fast--the world is actually really dangerous!


@SarahP That's why it's always so frustrating not to be able to carry stuff on airplanes. Dude, someone could kill you with shoelaces and a pen, do you really think actual forks for the dinner service are going to be a problem?


In all seriousness:

It's genuinely terrifying how lax safety practices are in jobs where they need to be tighter, tighter than common sense might dictate they be. We have a lot of unnecessary injuries at the store, many of which could be eliminated if they took safety as seriously as they do making sales plan. There is no pre-employment safety training of any kind and I only just had to watch my first safety video in this job about six months ago. I've been here nearly three years. I had three full days of safety training when I worked for a defense contractor and I wasn't even in a production area (I was in the warehouse, which is less dangerous but still involves heavy machinery and the potential to get conked on the head from something high up).

My dad is high up at the same defense contractor and gets called at home when a recordable injury occurs in his area while he's not there. You would not believe how infrequent this is. Indeed, when there are injuries there, they're worse than the store's slips, trips, cuts, and bruises -- unfortunately a couple of years ago there was a fatality at his job as well, due to the "least fatal" of the Fatal Four on that infographic -- but slips, trips, cuts, and bruises are much more preventable, and it's a terrible shame we're not made as aware of it.


@camanda I do safety training for new hires. We have all these horrid, bloody pictures that I force them to pass around and look at while I explain what PPE they SHOULD HAVE been wearing or what safety regulation they SHOULD HAVE been following to prevent the accident.

You can always tell during that talk who in the room will be a 2 am call for an accident. They don't care. They roll their eyes and look at their watches. I've been known to throw them out of orientation for that behavior because, seriously, I once worked an accident where a young man lost his hand in an entirely preventable event. HIS HAND. He did something stupid and LOST A HAND at the age of 23.

Related: I once had to talk with a man about the strike injury he received in his groin. Translation: a guy got hit in the balls then had to fill out paperwork and chat with me about it.


@OhShesArtsy That's what they do at the defense contractor, plus lots of grisly videos. I had similar recordable-injury-waiting-to-happen vibes from other people in the orientations, too (I had to do it every summer, four times total, since I was technically a new hire every year). And not just my fellow college summer people: permanent employees were even worse. "You mean I have to do what now?" Eh, you don't have to. But have fun getting walked out the gate by your supervisor.

I vividly remember two guys getting canned one summer. One was driving a forklift. The other was standing on the blades of the forklift. True genius at work.


Seriously though. I find it a little horrifying that my only serious work injury came waitressing, when I've also worked in the back country for 3 years, and a pet store for a year. (Falling plates are scary.)

New Hoarder

@The Kendragon I'm a 'brarian, so there are books that could fall on me and break my face any and every day but I am most scared when I am walking down the stairs. I can see myself slipping and wickedly face-planting and all of my teeth falling out except one which lodges itself in my brain and then I die.


@The Kendragon I have never fallen down the stairs, but I have fallen up multiple times. Always when I'm carrying lots of papers, and always when there are tons of people around to goggle at the girl who can't control herself on the stairs. It's an art!

New Hoarder

I read this as "How to stay awake at the office." Still no useful advice floating around on that subject. *yawn*


I love how the only comment on that link is pointing out the one thing that struck me about this post-- the appearance of "wich" in a title. I was more amused. The commenter was pretty miffed.
BUT, I know some graphic design people who are equally rage-y if they see errors in a cool shiny project, so.


Oh god, my job is a combo of the 1st and 5th most fatal industries, and I seem to be particularly accident prone. I might as well just lay down and die right now, here in my cubicle.


Solution: don't work?


@Megano! Sounds like a plan!


I think I've reached info-graphic fatigue. My eyes just won't focus on them. What do I doooo?


Ever food service job I've had (e.g. every job I've had) has limited kitchen/storage space and I always have to get on a ladder because I'm 5'2". I'll offer to do it for others, though, since some people get nervous on the tall ladder and I'm all, "YO I am a pro at this, I have been short since birth."

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