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Friday, May 4, 2012

388

Why Do We Still Live Here, in This Repulsive Town?

Theory: You are officially over your ex once you can listen, unmoved, to the Magnetic Fields lyric: "You won't be happy with me, but give me one more chance / you won't be happy anyway."

Feel free to propose alternative lyrics, or the entirety of "Pictures of You" by The Cure.



388 Comments / Post A Comment

thenotestaken

Or when you no longer use "I Don't Want To Get Over You" as a how-to guide for life?

breadtwinkle

@thenotestaken Or sing the lyrics to "I Don't Want to Get Over You" and not feel sheepish about them detailing your current habits?

babybuster

@breadtwinkle I registered to comment solely based on the fact that I had I Don't Want To Get Over You song stuck in me head before I was even done reading this post. Shame-listening to this song on repeat? Been there.

CharethCutestory

@thenotestaken
One of my FAVORITE bands!!! I'm seeing them on Monday in Madrid--WOOP!

intentsandpurposes@twitter

@breadtwinkle found you, my beautiful ladyfriend! I'm currently singing the lyrics of "No One Will Ever Love You." It's angrier than "I Don't Want to Get Over You," which fits my personality :)

breadtwinkle

@intentsandpurposes@twitter I had to come back here to find YOU. <3

PotatoPotato

When you stop singing along to Amanda Palmer's "The Jeep Song" and meaning it.

PotatoPotato

You're a bully and a clown
You made me cry and put me down

I guess it's just my stupid luck
That all of Boston drives that same black fucking truck

So don't tell me that you're off to see the world
I know you wont get very far
Don't call me if you get another girl baby
Just call me if you get another car

discombobulated

@PotatoPotato That first Dresden Dolls album has SO MANY good angry breakup songs.

Like "Good Day", which is like "Look how happy and functional and independent I am!" but she's obviously being independent AT her ex. "God it's been a lovely day / Everything's been going my way / Ever since you went away, hey I'm on fire... / So you don't want to hear about my good day?"

Oh and then there's "Truce", where she tries and fails to break up with her lover like an adult, dividing up the entire world evenly to avoid seeing each other, but there's so much simmering RAGE. "And if we should meet through some misunderstanding / I'll be very sweet, very patient and forgiving / Now get off my side of the state."

PotatoPotato

@discombobulated: "Good Day" has particular meaning to me, due to the same ex. I'd come home from work and tell him about how awesome a day I had, and would get zero reaction. I'd have to dig around for something to complain about, something somebody did or said that was kinda sucky, and then BOOM I had is attention. When I finally realized this, I would come home and tell him about having had a great day on purpose, go on about it for a while. And he didn't want to hear about it!

I was with him 3 years. It took me 8 months to dig myself out of a negative, Let's Find Something To Complain About mindset. It was the only way to connect to him.

gem
gem

@PotatoPotato You're killing me.

Emby

"Fix me to a chain around your neck and wear me like a nickel / Even new wine served in old skins cheapens the taste / I shot the pilot, now I'm begging you to fly this for me."

Hmmmm... gauging... yep, still a few pangs left at the bottom of this ol' heart.

kvetina

@Emby brand new!! that song gets me every single time :(

melis

IF YOU CAN LISTEN TO THE MAGNETIC FIELDS WITHOUT BEING MOVED CONGRATULATIONS YOU ARE NOT A HUMAN, IT'S BASICALLY A VOIGHT-KAMPFF EMPATHY TEST

baconeggs

Good one, Nicole. Good job posting something like THAT right in the middle of the day.
Oh man, my heart is so broken!!

Woman Laughing Alone With Boas

Ugh, shiiiiiiiiiiiiit, breakup songs. My two most devastating breakups were marked by the inability to listen to:
1. "Let it Die" by Feist [(beginning with the line "Don't you wish we could forget that kiss?") don't judge me] and
2. "These Days" by Nico ("These days I sit on cornerstones and count the time in quarter-tones to 10. Please don't confront me with my failures, I had not forgotten them.")

without turning into snotty mess. Lorrrrrrd. Doesn't happen anymore, though!

twocats

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas I'm not even going through a breakup and I can't listen to "These Days" without crying...

slutberry

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas "Let It Die" is definitely one of the most devastating songs ever. Even when I am happily ensconced in a relationship, it beats up my heart.

"See this for what it is-- we're not in love. / The saddest part of a broken heart / isn't the ending so much as the start / the tragedy starts at the very first spark / losing your mind for the sake of your heart..."

SarahP

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas Not only breakups--if I think too hard about all of college while listening to "These Days," I will have a meltdown.

sarah girl

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas "These Days" and "The Fairest of the Seasons" were the last songs I listened to in my college dorm room before I moved out on graduation day; it was quiet, just pre-dawn, I was surrounded by boxes. Weeeeeeep.

Jane Err

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas Both of these, yes. So piercing.

okaycrochet

@Sarah H. Nico and college = cryinggggggg

candybeans

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas Let it Die. DAMN. I listened to that song right when I got together with someone, and then afterward, and, ugh. She was just too right, that Feist.

han
han

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas Feist has been my heartbreak soundtrack for ages. Especially The Reminder, oh man. The Park!!! Intution!!!

loudmouthedgirl

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas Oh man, you are right on the money with those two. I will also add Amy Millan's "Baby I" to that list.

octagonfudge

@Woman Laughing Alone With Boas I still can't listen to it, ever, without crying. It reminds me too much of those times, even if I'm not living them right now!

What'sUpMakeup

Theory proven. I heard this song the other day and, while I still think it's a beautiful line, it didn't pack the same punch to the gut it once did. I used to think it was "romantic" to sacrifice being happy in a long term relationship because that meant it was "realer" (whatever that means). Eff that ess. Be happy.

iceberg

@What'sUpMakeup : ( : ( : ( I'm glad you're happier!

liznieve

@iceberg : ( : ( : ( is like one of those old woman / young woman or two faces / candlestick things. Smilies or frownies and at what proportion?

themmases

When you can listen unmoved to "At the Hop" by Devendra Banhart. It was really hard to even pick a line, but "Put me in your suitcase/Let me help you pack/'Cause you're never coming back/No you're never coming back" might sum it up.

thenotestaken

@themmases "Put me in your marrow / Stuff me in your bones" is my favourite. Oh goodness.

MailerMattDaemon

"And it was hard/Like coming off the pills that you take to stay happy." Harder still when you hear it sung in melancholy Belle & Sebastian voice!

Also, anything ever from Joan Armatrading perpetually reminds me of cigarettes, tears, and my old stoop. ALSO Blur's "Sweet Song." Murderous.

SarahP

@MailerMattDaemon OH MAN that's my favorite Belle and Sebastian song! It doesn't even make me sad, I love it so much.

lora.bee

@MailerMattDaemon YES. For some reason, "I'm A Cuckoo" by B&S was also an ultimate break up song for me.

NeenerNeener

@SarahP
It sounds like summer to me, makes me happy, and also my favorite.

DH@twitter

"You've got to know/when it's time to turn the page/or when you're only wet/because of all the rain."

Decca

@DH@twitter Awww, yes.

DH@twitter

@Decca

Also in the vein of redheaded pianists, "Summer in the City" by Regina Spektor.

slutberry

@DH@twitter "Ode to Divorce" by Regina Spektor. \

"I need your money
it'll help me
I need your car and I need your love..."

RK Fire

@DH@twitter: Yes yes yes. Between this and the Mists of Avalon thing, I think we are kindred spirits.

DH@twitter

@sniffadee

Reginaaaaaa.

"Bye Bye Beautiful" might not be strictly about a break-up, but it's so nice and vengeful and angry.

@RKFire: lots of people of the race that knows Joseph here at the 'Pin!

Reginal T. Squirge

@DH@twitter So won't you help a brother out?

DH@twitter

@ReginalTSquirge@twitter

You've eaten something minty, and you're making that face that I like...

Dammit, I am in a happy relationship. I just really like sad songs.

sarah girl

@DH@twitter Oh hell, this just reminded me that I went to see Regina live after a particularly awful breakup, and I silently wept through all of "Two Birds."

I could never figure out which bird I was in that song.

slutberry

@DH@twitter Breakup songs tap that deep vein of melancholy that you just need tapped sometimes.

like this

_questingbeast

'If you should see me and I walk on by/ Oh darling, please don't cry/ tonight we'll meet...'

LaLoba

@questingbeast AT THE DARK END OF THE STREET

LaLoba

@questingbeast But isn't that song more about either
1) Cheatin' hearts or
2) A socially unacceptable and potentially dangerous relationship that burns passionately in secret?

_questingbeast

@LaLoba Yes, it is a cheating song. But I can't help it, it's the only song I ever want to listen to in unhappy-love-circumstances! It's mostly the way Parsons' voice breaks on the word 'darling' (I like the James Carr version too, but it's not as sad).

sarah girl

The answer is always "Your Ex-Lover is Dead" by Stars. Always.

sarah girl

@Sarah H.

"There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save"

CalBee

@Sarah H. YES.

lora.bee

@Sarah H. Aaaand now I'm crying. I think I blocked that song from my memory.

PotatoPotato

@Sarah H.: The fist bajillion times I listened to that song I thought the last line was, "I'm not sorry there's nothing to say." Which, for me, also works.

okaycrochet

@Sarah H. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

phlox

@PotatoPotato Ugh, I listened to that song so much after my Montreal break-up. (But then go you listen to Owen Pallett's version and crack up at the little kid yelling at the start.)

dj pomegranate

@Sarah H. This is one of the few breakup songs that I listened to incessantly while breaking up and still love as a non-heartbroken person. So good and true.

You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save

frigwiggin

@Sarah H.

And all of that time you thought I was sad
I was trying to remember your name

heyhaley

@Sarah H.
But it's kind of triumphant too! I think!

I'll write you a postcard, I'll send you the news
From the house down the road, from real love

phlox

@heyhaley Whoa, I have never thought of a comma there! I thought it was like the postcard would come from a house down the road from real love, like he never quite got there. But I like your interpretation better.

melis

Loving the album name.

frigwiggin

@phlox I loooove differing song interpretations! I always assumed there was no comma there too.

dj pomegranate

@phlox @frigwiggin I always assumed there was a comma there too! Maybe because there's a pause there? It's sadder without the comma.

frigwiggin

@dj pomegranate I think that's why I prefer it without. SO POIGNANT AND WHATEVER.

Nicole Cliffe

@Sarah H. Shit, YES, THAT SONG.

iceberg

Ohh I don't have a breakup song but Rihanna's "We found love (in a hopeless place)" makes me weep uncontrollably for some reason. It's just so bleak and desperate.

sarah girl

@iceberg I feel the same way! I love it (and dancing to it), but it's so sad.

slutberry

@iceberg ME TOO AND OMG THE VIDEO. It makes me cry. Same with the one that she and Eminem did together (but that might be because I have a forever crush on Eminem)

iceberg

@sniffadee The VIDEO. So much concrete.

slutberry

@iceberg THE VIDEO. It sort of makes me think of Requiem for a Dream, and then I have to curl up in a little ball for a while and not talk to anyone.

Requiem for a Dream hurts so much but I can't help watching it over and over and over.

Decca

Or when you can listen to Yung Humma singing "Lemme Smang It" without shedding a wistful tear.

iceberg

@Decca *sigh* Gary used to know exactly how to smang it..."

alpelican

Oh, please, for once in my life, let me let me let me get what I want, lord knows it would be the first time.

BoozinSusan

@alpelican Morrissey wins at everything. Like when some fan met him on the street and said "Are you Morrissey?" and he sighed and replied, "Every fucking day."

george glass

@alpelican Haha that song just feels like the absolute most self-indulgent song every time. Usually helps with perspective.

Olivia2.0

@alpelican IF you really feel like getting down (or up? unclear?) go listen to the PS85 kids choir do that song. HEART. BREAKING. BEAUTIFUL.

cuminafterall

@alpelican The scene in Pretty in Pink where Duckie is sitting alone in his room listening to that song: so perfect.

Emma Peel

My December breakup coincided with Adele's "Someone Like You" getting played 1000x a day. Mostly doing fine these days but still can't listen to it without crying. (It was a very nice, considerate, loving breakup on the whole, but one that totally needed to happen. That song just devastates me.)

Lily Rowan

@Emma Peel I hope you've seen the Saturday Night Live sketch with everyone weeping uncontrollably to that song?

redheaded&crazy

@Emma Peel it definitely feels good that i no longer have the urge to belt out Adele's "Set Fire to the Rain" while driving (usually there would be weeping as well)

there's a side to you that i never knew NEVER KNEW all the lies you told they were never true NEVER TRUE all the games you played you would ALWAYS WINNNNNNN SO I SET FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRE TO THE RAIN

my winter encapsulated

dj pomegranate

@Emma Peel I remember the first time I heard "Someone Like You," I thought, "I'm so glad I am not going through a breakup right now because this song makes me feel devastated." It is just in inherently devastating song and I imagine much more so when you are already devastated!

Emma Peel

@dj pomegranate Just thinking about it is making me sad. I do wish him nothing but the best! Waaaahhhhh.

Five years ago I was going through a breakup with my first, long-distance boyfriend when "Hey There Delilah" was getting more airplay than it deserved. I would bitterly mutter "it's not going to work, you crazy kids." I time my breakups poorly for Top 40 hits.

applestoapples

I don't know if it really counts, but "The Blower's Daughter" by Damien Rice had me in sobbing spells when I had my first major breakup.
But really, I even cried at "Heartbreaker" by Mariah Carey, so I was kind of a mess then.

sarah girl

@applestoapples Yeah, I had an embarrassing moment in my last breakup, bursting into absolutely hysterical tears at... Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream."

slutberry

@applestoapples Damien Rice is way good at the breakup songs. Brutally good. "Blower's Daughter" makes me cry too. Also "Leave" by Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova. Also the one that goes 'the little cracks they escalated / before we knew it was too late". Also all the others.

lora.bee

@applestoapples "Lies"!!! Yes! You're moving too fast for me/And I can't keep up with you..."

DH@twitter

@Sarah H.

No worries. Once I was driving home from work and crying to "Love Story." Goddamn you Taylor Swift.

dj pomegranate

@DH@twitter In breakup songs, there is no such thing as embarrassment. Truth.

Gracefully and Grandly

@dj pomegranate then this seems like an appropriate place to confess that John Mayer's "Slow Dancing in a Burning Room" was a break up song of mine...

wee_ramekin

@sniffadee If we're talking about heart-rending break-up songs by Damien Rice, surely the list is not completely without "Volcano".

slutberry

@wee_ramekin OH MAN.

And Cannonball... and ALLL of that album...

SomethingSomething

She comes back to tell me she's gone/ As if I didn't know that/ As if I didn't know my own bed./ As if I'd never noticed/ the way she brushed her hair from her forehead.

Oh Paul Simon, singing to my soul. Breaks my heart every time! Break up songs are the BEST.

Also, one more, Nothing Better - Postal Service. MAN OH MAN.

Amanda@twitter

@SomethingSomething Ugh, I bought that Postal Service album shortly before I got dumped for the first time. You know you're over it when you stop thinking the guy in the song makes more sense than the girl.

sarah girl

@Amanda@twitter AMEN

give cheese some pants

@SomethingSomething Graceland! And I see losing love is like a window in your heart/ Everybody sees you're blown apart/ Everybody feels the wind blow

I am usually tearing up by the time the "ooo-ooo-ooo-oo" comes around.

Bittersweet

@SomethingSomething: More devastating Postal Service:

The stranger with your door key/explaining that I'm just visiting/I am finally seeing/that I was the one worth leaving.

a5ouncebird

@give cheese some pants OMG. Literally possibly absolutely the truest lyric every written about the loss of love. I searched the comments for 'Paul Simon' before posting because I was like 'No way someone has not yet posted this line.'

PistolPackinMama

@a5ouncebird I am so glad to see someone mentioned Paul Simon. So sad.

And in a "I learned about music in the late 80's/ early 90's" vein:

These days my life is an open book
Missing pages I cannot seem to find
These days your face
In my memory
Is in a folded hand of grace against these times

No one's ever come between your memory and me
I have driven this weary vessel here alone
Will you still find me if I leave you here beside this road
'Cause' I need someone who can touch me
Who'll put no one above me
Someone who needs me
Like the air he breathes

Oh, Nanci Griffith.

wee_ramekin

@PistolPackinMama Have you heard "On Grafton Street" by Nanci Griffith?

"It's funny how my world goes round without you
You're the one thing I never thought
I could live without
I just found this smile to think about you
You're a Saturday night
Far from the madding crowd"

Oh Jesus. Shit, I'm actually crying now.

And let's not even talk about the chest-heaving sobs brought on by "Trouble in the Fields".

Porn Peddler

Ten Years Gone by Led Zeppelin, I ain't even ashamed of that shit.

Porn Peddler

Seriously, last time I had a surge of missing a guy I used to see, I laid on the floor with my big headphones and CRIIIIIIIIED to that shit. Proud to say I could probably fuck that guy this weekend if I wanted to and I feel no compulsion to do it.

LornaLoo

@Third Wave Housewife ughhhhh you gave me the chills with Ten years Gone, and i'm totally in a happy relationship, and have been for years.

Also See Tea for One, and when one is feeling more triumphant, Your Time Is Gonna Come.

frigwiggin

Or Louder, by Vermillion Lies and don't feel so sad at "the last time I went shopping / I bought your favorite kind of ice cream." Okay, that makes me feel sad regardless. (My favorite queer breakup song, no lie.)

frigwiggin

@frigwiggin Pleaaaasse someone else give me more good queer breakup songs!

wee_ramekin

@frigwiggin Welp, off the top of my head (these are by queer artists):

"Call It Off" - Tegan & Sara

"Untouchable Face" - Ani DiFranco
"So What" - Ani DiFranco
"School Night" - Ani DiFranco [WARNING: Do not listen to this song unless you actually have a death wish.]

"Warm Whispers" - Missy Higgins
"Where I Stood" - Missy Higgins

"Only One" - Melissa Ethridge

"Fool of Me" - Meshell Ndegeocello

"Smoke and Ashes" - Tracy Chapman
"At This Point in My Life" - Tracy Chapman

"Heartbeats" - The Knife (are they queer? they seem queer)

"Cripple and the Starfish" - Antony and the Johnsons

"Mace Spray" - The Jezabels

"No One Just Is" - Holly Miranda

wee_ramekin

Also, "Recessional" by Vienna Teng still hurts my heart all these years later. I don't believe that Vienna is queer, but she's incredibly queer-friendly, and this song is sung to a "her".

Seriously, listen to it. It's beautiful.

wee_ramekin

And also "Tekno Love Song" by CocoRosie. One half of that sister-band is queer. Their song "By Your Side" is good when you're in that masochistic, self-debasing stage of the break-up where you want to unhealthily revel in your martyrdom in the relationship.

Ugh. Break-ups, amirite?

wee_ramekin

@wee_ramekin OH MY GOD SOMEBODY ELSE COMMENT.

sweetoutofline

@wee_ramekin
I just created an account to add to this thread. What about "Ghost" by the Indigo Girls? See also Brandi Carlile's cover of this song.

sandwiches

@wee_ramekin Okay, seriously, even just thinking about school night and the, the, mouth on the boy I used to listen to "School Night" about is making my throat close up.

damn it.

wee_ramekin

@sandwiches "School Night" is devastating. I think Ani's trademark amazing wordplay is at its best in this song, and the way she sings it just makes your heart squeeze painfully. It doesn't help that the situation in that song closely mirrored my own at the time, except I was in the same position as the love Ani was leaving. Fuck man, that song seriously still makes me feel so raw.

@sweetoutofline Ack! How could I forget Brandi Carlile and the Indigo Girls? Well, I actually only know one Indigo Girls song, so that is how, but Brandi Carlile! Another good break-up song by her is "What Can I Say".

iceberg

Also, best song *about* a breakup: Dry Your Eyes, by The Streets.

DH@twitter

@iceberg

Truth.

DH@twitter

@iceberg

Oh, "It's Too Late" too. Geez, Mike Skinner.

rebecca@twitter

@DH@twitter Just thinking about "it's too late" has brought me up in goosebumps.

SarahP

"Pictures of You"? How about anything by the Cure, ever.

SarahP

Annnnnd Leonard Cohen. SOBS.

bot
bot

@SarahP
Sometimes I see her undressing for me,
She's the soft naked lady love meant her to be,
She's moving her body so brave and so free,
If I've got to remember that's a fine memory.
And I know from her eyes, and I know from her smile,
That tonight will be fine, will be fine, will be fine,
Will be fine - for a while.

When I'm there without tears, I'm good.

JessicaLovejoy

The "Crazy" cover by Kidney Thieves. There is an angry teenage girl in me, and no matter how many offerings I bring her, she shall not be appeased.

Jane Err

@JessicaLovejoy That's a great, great cover.

Megasus

@JessicaLovejoy Kidney Thieves! Loved them, had a huge girlcrush on the lead singer.

fabel

@everyone I love you all for loving Kidneythieves, & yes, that is an awesome cover

alpelican

Here's a silhouette, the face always turned away. The bleeding color gone to black, dying like a day. Couldn't figure out what made you so unhappy, shook your head to say no no no, then stopped for a spell, and stayed that way... oh well, ok.

alpelican

@alpelican If you get a feeling next time you see me, do me a favor and let me know, cuz it's hard to tell, it's hard to say oh well, ok.

alpelican

Man, no Elliott Smith fans here, huh? I feel old.

sceps yarx

@alpelican no, no, don't worry, I'm old too and I love Elliott Smith. For those days when you just feel like stabbing yourself in the heart (R.I.P. Elliott!)

joie

@alpelican She appears composed, so she is I suppose, who can really tell? She shows no emotion at all, stares into space like a dead china doll.

I'm never going to know you now, but I, I'm going to love you anyhow.

anachronistique

"Too young to hold on, but too old to just break free and run..."

alpelican

@anachronistique hammer, meet head

DH@twitter

@anachronistique

Aaaaagh. Best song on that CD.

slutberry

@anachronistique YOU SHOULD HAVE COME OVER

Gracefully and Grandly

@anachronistique oh god, that song. always.

okaycrochet

@anachronistique MY KINGDOM FOR A KISS UPON HER SHOULDER

anachronistique

@DH@twitter Kiss me out of desire, babe, but not consolation.

iwearaFEZnow

@anachronistique oh god. that song came on shuffle the other day and i almost burst into tears on a bus… it. is. so. good.
excuse me, thinking about it means i have to go keep from ugly crying at work...

twocats

Joan Baez via Dar Williams: "You know I think Christmas was a long red glare, shot up like a warning. We gave presents without cards, and then the snow, and then the snow came. We were always out shoveling. Then we'd fall to sleep exhausted, and we'd wake up, and its snowing."

slutberry

@twocats YES. That's the song I was trying to think of. It's particularly fragile because February also sucks and things were rocky in February and I would listen to it and cry on my way home.

(but everything turned out okay)

sceps yarx

@sniffadee I love the Dar Williams version of that song. And my birthday is in February! Actually I love that whole Dar Williams album.

dtowngirl

"Trouble" by Cat Stevens.

Two-Headed Girl

The Jose Gonzalez cover of "Heartbeats", which is really best put on repeat at 3am while drinking terrible wine.

Also, if you can hear "Get Lonely" by the Mountain Goats without wanting to bawl and hug your dog...you probably can't feel emotion. I'm in an awesome relationship and I *still* can't listen to it without thinking of Every Bad Thing That Has Ever Happened To Me.

discombobulated

@Two-Headed Girl Oh God, the entire "Get Lonely" album often drives me to tears, and I've never even had a bad breakup. My favorite song from it is "Woke Up New", but all those songs are wonderful and devastating.

wee_ramekin

@Two-Headed Girl Actually, The Knife's version is pretty eye-watering too.

discombobulated

"Woke Up New" by The Mountain Goats. Oh man. I love how John Darnielle describes the confusion when you've just broken up and all your habits still depend on your ex, like:

The first time I made coffee for just myself, I made too much of it
But I drank it all just cause you hate it when I let things go to waste
And I wandered through the house like a little boy lost in the mall
And an astronaut could've seen the hunger in my eyes from space
Kristen

@discombobulated Oh man, I just posted my Mountain Goats lyric a second after yours. Guy gets it, man.

realtalk

@discombobulated when he plays that live, he says something like this - "This is a song I always tell a very long story about at the beginning because I want to make sure that the one person who’s in the crowd who is actually experiencing the story at that exact moment knows that I have got your back. It’s hard for me to imagine that there’s anyone who hasn’t experienced that crushing loss of waking up one morning and having this brief moment where you’re thinking, ‘Oh, I’m waking up, it’s nice, I slept, I’m waking up, the light is coming through the window, it’s all right…oh fuck. I broke up with the person I love yesterday.’ And then suddenly, it’s really this amazing, cinematic thing where the darkness floods in from the corners of your eyes, and if you’re a big ol’ drama queen like me, you just start crying immediately….It sounds funny when you’re talking about it, but if you’re down in it, it’s like, seriously, you think nothing could be worse. If they’d cut off both my arms, I’d rather them do that than for me to feel this feeling that so-and-so is gone, and isn’t coming back, and it’s so horrible, and so whoever you are that’s suffering, I wrote this song for you. It’s called Woke Up New."

<3 u jd

discombobulated

@realtalk He is seriously the best. <3

candybeans

@discombobulated THIS was the song I was looking for, and was going to post if no one had. I couldn't listen to any Mountain Goats at ALL for maybe a year after my last breakup, but this song in particular could bring me to tears even when it just popped into my head (where it would accompany Colin Hay singing "I just don't think i'll ever get over you," which was background music for every thought I had, basically).

realtalk

@candybeans @discombobulated @Kristen awww I love this thread and I want to give you all a giant hug

candybeans

@realtalk WHOA i finally just read the prologue you posted, and THAT IS THE THING. For a long time, I would dream about my ex every night, and that waking up was the most awful part of my day, because I'd turn over thinking he was there with me (because he was there and with me in my dreams), and then, THE DARKNESSSSS.
god, what a wreck I was. My breakup bunker was 100 feet below the earth and flooded with tears, obvs.

Kristen

"Some things you do for money, and some you do for fun, but the things you do for love are gonna come back to you one by one."

Opos

Yessss, good reminder to change the Pandora station for maximum crying at work on Friday! Rock on.

SarahP

@Opos I wish I could listen to Pandora at work! (Or not, because of crying. But still, what a cool idea.)

Girl Named Jack

"We are the ever-living ghost of what once was" from that Band of Horses song. I can not only listen to it now - I can also sing it in the shower without bawling. It's been a few years.

The other, non-musical way I know I'm over my ex? Today, I am closing on my house, refinancing to get his name off the mortgage. Finally. Which means that after today, I may NEVER have to email him again to chase down various paperwork. And this makes me so, so happy. I never thought that the prospect of not talking to someone would be so freeing.

Girl Named Jack

@Clare That's the one! Sad song, but so pretty.

PomoFrannyGlass

@Girl Named Jack Congratulations. I had this moment a couple weeks ago after tax season. It's crazy how emotional boring administrative matters can get.

Bittersweet

@Girl Named Jack: "No One's Gonna Love You." That song slays me every time.

Nonsynchronous

@Girl Named Jack: Even though I'm happy in my relationship "No One's Gonna Love You" still makes me want to cry. When going through a breakup I would hear the first 15 seconds and start sobbing.

EpWs

I had to retire the entire album of Modest Mouse's "The Moon And Antarctica" after my first big breakup. Still can't enjoy it, though it doesn't turn me into a sobbing mess anymore.

"I don't want you to be alone down there..."

Olivia2.0

@The Everpresent Wordsnatcher We are the same person. The ex-was living the extra bedroom after the break up and I probably played "Paper Thin Walls" 5,000 times WHILE I COULD HEAR HIM HAVING PHONE SEX WITH HIS NEW LADY FRIEND NO JOKE. I am still mad about that.

EpWs

@Olivia2.0 Holy fuck that is terrible. DUDE, SERIOUSLY?

Olivia2.0

@The Everpresent Wordsnatcher I KNOW RIGHT?????????????????? Also, she was like 3 miles away when he would do this. I would literally be like JUST GO UP THERE ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?

Full disclosure: I am not dead and I am friendly-ish with said ex. He is not LITERALLY the devil.

EpWs

@Olivia2.0 MAYBE HE DIDN'T WANT YOU TO BE ALONE DOWN THERE OH WAIT *sobs*

Guh, breakups.

Olivia2.0

@The Everpresent Wordsnatcher I'm sure it was actually done out of some misplaced "helping" tendency. But, exactly, GAH breakups.

SarahP

You know what's worse for me, actually? Songs that tell me I'll be okay or everything will be alright. YOU DON'T KNOW THAT, SONG. YOU CAN'T EVEN KNOW.

("Somebody Loves You" by Eels, "Everything Will Be Alright" by the Killers, "Why Not Smile" by REM... more?)

Roxanne Rholes

@SarahP I sometimes feel bitchy when I hear songs like that..."easy for YOU to say, YOU'RE a famous musician!" The ones about how money can't by happiness are the worst. Especially if you are broke.

Tuna Surprise

Sinead O'Connor "This is the last day of our acquaintance."

When she sings "I know you don't love me anymore..." Ooof, it's a tearjerker each and every time.

dale

@Tuna Surprise Sinead synchronicity! I was going to post "It's been so lonely without you here / like a bird without a song / nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling / tell me baby where did I go wrong?" which I don't attach to a breakup, as such, because he never wanted to date me in the first place, but I wallowed in that song for weeks anyway.

twocats

Oh! Also "Lived in Bars" by Cat Power - both emotionally gut-wrenching and surprisingly helpful in getting over a break up

Kerri Mercury Morris@facebook

"Hang" by Matchbox 20. I was 10 or 11 when the album came out and I would listen to it on repeat on my Walkman and weep openly.

"Well I always say, it would be good to go away
But if things don't work out like we think
And there's nothing there to ease this ache
But if there's nothing there to make things change
If it's the same for you I'll just hang"

Megan@twitter

@Kerri Mercury Morris@facebook Yep, high school breakup. That was tough.

Kulojam

@Kerri Mercury Morris@facebook Ohhh, Matchbox 20 and high school breakup. I saw them in concert in high school WITH the guy, and then he dumped me for not having sex with him. Jerk. Also putting in an appearance in that dark, dark January 1997 was Duncan Sheik's "Barely Breathing" and Ani Difranco's "Untouchable Face."

Legs Battaglia

Damage, Yo La Tengo
I used to think about you all the time/
I would think about you all the time/
now it just feels weird, cause there you are

PricklyPear

Gone for Good by Morphine

"I'm never going back
I'm never going back to you
I'm never going to see you again
I'm never going to dig out your picture
I'm never going to look you up someday
Life is very short
You don't love me anymore
So I'm never going to see you again"

PotatoPotato

Oh, and for when you're convinced you'll be alone FOREVER:

You look so defeated lying there in your new twin sized bed.

discombobulated

@PotatoPotato Ouch!

sarah girl

Oh, "Crown of Love" by Arcade Fire - more about falling out of love, but still.

"If you still want me
Please forgive me
Because the spark
Is not within me"

Two-Headed Girl

@Sarah H. "I etched your name/across my eyelids/you prayed for rain/I prayed for blindness" = tears.

coreykins

@Sarah H. Oh my GOD, that song KILLS me every single time. So heartbreaking, especially the ending. When the music starts to pick up pace and gets moderately frantic. Tears forever.

OxfordComma

"But I wish there was somethin' you would do or say
To try and make me change my mind and stay
We never did too much talking anyway
So don't think twice, it's all right."

Ooooohhhh, Bobby Dylan.

annepersand

@OxfordComma Have you heard - of all people - Ke$ha's cover of this song? It actually destroys me every time.

OxfordComma

@annepersand : I am going to have to find that. Thanks!

mbmargarita

Since being dumped, putting my ipod on shuffle has become like a game of Russian roulette.

iwearaFEZnow

@mbmargarita before my music library went kablooey and i lost all my playlists, i had the break-up songs quarantined in one, the entire thing could be unchecked and unsynced when necessary.

i should look into doing that again...

wee_ramekin

@mbmargarita I've been there, ladyfriend. Doubly so if one's ex brought a whole lot of amazing music you'd never heard into your life.

RNL
RNL

And you're really flying when that lyric makes you go "wtf" and feel a little nauseous because the thought of being in an unhappy relationship is horrifying in comparison to being happily single but you remember a time when that was not the case.

redheaded&crazy

@RobotsNeedLove word

lora.bee

This is totally high school for me, but "Tech Romance" by Her Space Holiday.

I'm sick of seeing you cry
And wasting all your time
On someone who will never care enough
To make you feel loved
To make you feel safe
I would drop my life to take his place

To show you just how good
Being touched could be
Commit these words to memory
For when you find yourself
Pinned under his demands
I am still an option that you have

This song especially, since I had just GONE through my first shattering breakup, and my best guy friend at the time made me a cd with THIS song on it...

Gracefully and Grandly

Snow Patrol's 'Chasing Cars' was a big one for me though I don't even remember if the lyrics were even break up-y anymore...

PomoFrannyGlass

"When you laugh/I just cry/When you left/I just died/Are you already over me?" (Stones)

"Foolish pride, that's all I have left/So let me hide the tears and sadness that you gave me/When you said goodbye" (Dionne W.)

"You were the only answer/my plans spun all around you/Five years in the wrong I am assured/my name to you is just another word." (Doughty)

and that effing Gotye song.

george glass

@PomoFrannyGlass Ahhhh mike doughty I knowww

charmcity

UGH "Good Things" by Sleater-Kinney for me. "Why do good things never want to stay/Some things you lose, some things you give away"

Decca

@charmcity "One More Hour" when they're singing together - I just can't

sarah girl

(sorry, I am all the fuck over this post)

This is HIGHLY embarrassing, but I remember breaking up with my 9th grade boyfriend and listening to 98 Degrees' "The Hardest Thing" and feeling like the shittiest person.

JessAndNo21

Sam Cooke "Bring It On Home to Me." Over. and over. and over. and over. and over. (then the live version) over. and over.

Reginal T. Squirge

@JessAndNo I wanted "Never Gonna Change This Love" to be our song but we never got that far. It's our song somewhere in an alternate reality.

Mariajoseh

Fiona Apple is my ultimate break-up singer. (NEVER IS A PROMISE, OMG SO SAD) and Shakira has one in Spanish called Inevitable, which is the proof that she is a brilliant lyricst when she's not singing about being a she-wolf.

anachronistique

@Mariajoseh He said, "it's all in your head,"
and I said, "so's everything," but he didn't get it
I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy

breccalynn

@Mariajoseh Oh, definitely Fiona Apple here, too. When my ex and I split after 16 years I listened to the entire Extraordinary Machine album so, so many times. "Red, Red, Red" and "Not About Love" being the real tear jerkers, but any one of them could turn on the waterworks. I am proud to say that I can listen to that album without it raining on my face these days, but I know it's waiting in the wings for me should my current relationship tank.

in-in

@Mariajoseh If I'd heard "Never Is A Promise" when I broke up with my ex, I'm pretty sure I've wept myself to death on that one.

breccalynn

@breccalynn "I don't understand about complimentary colours and what they say. Side by side they both get bright. Together they both get grey. But he's been pretty much yellow, and I've been kind of blue. And all I can see is red, red, red now what am I gonna do?'

Mariajoseh

@anachronistique Paper Bag is basically the story of one of my relationships. He was even a little younger than me. "and I want him so bad oh it kills 'cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up"

@beccalynn I hope you don't have to use Fiona again :)

Tuna Surprise

@breccalynn
I can't listen to Extraordinary Machine any more because it was the last thing my ex-husband bought me (he though I'd like it) and I wore it out during the divorce. Red, Red, Red was my go-to for crying spells.

breccalynn

@Mariajoseh Me too, me too. But, while we're not broken up, things with current dude are kind of sketchy. Mostly from my end. I've kind of been preemptively listening to break-up-esque music in preparation. You know, just in case. I'm hoping things can be fixed, because I seriously love this dude, but I can't settle for anything less than awesome after having wasted so much of my life on mediocre from my ex.

lizkimballet

@breccalynn I did that in a relationship kinda and listened to Breakin' Up by rilo kiley. I was not very subtle haha

pterodactgirl

@Mariajoseh Shakira has some killer break-up songs. "Tu" and "Moscas en la casa" were the anthems of my last break-up. Why is it that her Spanish stuff is so much better than the English stuff though? She even sounds better on it I think.

Mariajoseh

@pterodactgirl yes! she has the best girl power songs in Spanish, I think. And I just don't know what happens to her in English. I guess a lot of it is not really mastering the lenguage. Like how it is taking me forever to write this comment, and I could do it in a second in Spanish.

pterodactgirl

@Mariajoseh My first language is English, but I still think the lyrics are much better in Spanish somehow. I've often wondered if it was the reverse of what you're describing though: that I just didn't understand them as well and so maybe I thought they were better because of it? I still love her in either language though :)

Mariajoseh

@pterodactgirl No, she is much better in spanish. I just remembered "No" : espero que no esperes que te espere / después de mis 23 la paciencia se me ha ido hasta los pies?. She doesn't play so much in English, I think. But I love her whatever she does. She was my first idol.

Blanca Méndez

@Mariajoseh YES INEVITABLE. "Para ser más franca nadie piensa en ti como lo hago yo (aunque te dé lo mismo)." That song is the most beautiful song forever.

Mariajoseh

@Blanca Méndez YES! And the way she kinda just whispers the saddest parts of the song?

My mom took me to see her for my 15th bday. At one point I turned to her and said "I really wish she plays inevitable" AND THEN THAT SONG STARTED and my mind was blown.

OxfordComma

@Tuna Surprise : I played this over and over and over again when my best friend broke up with me:

"Once my lover, now my friend
What a cruel thing to pretend
What a cunning way to condescend
Once my lover, and now my friend"

wee_ramekin

@Mariajoseh @Blanca Méndez @pterodactgirl WHY AREN'T WE TALKING ABOUT "LA PARED"?!?!?! Jesus, that song gets me every. time.

"Eres la enfermedad y el enfermero
Ya me has convertido en tu perro faldero
Sabes que sin ti ya yo no soy
Sabes que a donde vayas voy
Naturalmente."

Blanca Méndez

@wee_ramekin There are so many good ones! Shakira owns my heart(break).

realizedniche

Bill Callahan's cover of The Breeze/My Baby Cries. Breakup music for grownups, goddamn, and his voice!
Been listening to it at least a couple times a day for too long now.

travelmugs

I feel like there are a bunch of break-up articles lately. Is one of our 'Pin editors going through a rough patch?

Maja D.@twitter

ugh ugh ugh this one is the worst:

"Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga.

Because it is and was EVERYWHERE, and just at the wrong time for me. And it is so catchy. I'd start singing it and then feel sick.

Hot Doom

@Maja D.@twitter I'm glad someone else said it, because YES.

Maja D.@twitter

@LolaLaBalc Ra-a-uh-uh-uh, roma-ro-ma-ma, GaGa-ooh-la-la, want your oh no, no no no, I forgot it was this one... bleh!

rebecca@twitter

@Maja D.@twitter Oh god, I love that song, but I also hate it so much. Every time she wails "I don't want to be friends" it's like my heart snaps in half out of sympathy.

Hot Doom

@rebecca@twitter That and when she says 'walk, walk fashion baby/work it/move/that bitch cuh-razy' I get a real kick out of it. I'M A FREE BITCH, BABY.

plitter

Blur's "No Distance Left to Run":
It's over
You don't need to tell me
I hope you're with someone who makes you feel safe
When you're sleeping tonight...

Seriously, it's devastating.

emkay

Fiona Apple's "Oh Well"
"My peace and quiet was stolen from me/When I was looking with calm affection/You were searching out my imperfections/What wasted unconditional love/On somebody who doesn't believe in the stuff/Oh well."
Absolutely perfect when you're trying to pretend the breakup doesn't bother you, and perfect for that wonderful day when it actually doesn't.

okaycrochet

We used to laugh under the covers
Maybe not so often now
The way I used to laugh with you
Was loud and hard
....
Remember we used to dance
And everyone wanted to be you and me
I want to be too
What day is this
Besides the day you left

WEEP. FOR LIFE. And that was... six years ago, and I'm happy and he-man is the best ever, but still, WEEP.

EpWs

@okaycrochet OH GOD. That song...oh god.

sarah.@twitter

@okaycrochet SUDDENLY OVERWHELMED BY FEELINGS I FORGOT I HAD.

fabel

@okaycrochet My eyes started tearing reading that & I don't even know what song this is :(

okaycrochet

@fabel Stay of Leave Dave Matthews. Just.. oh no.

automaticdoor

Maybe I would have been
Something you'd be good at
Maybe you would have been
Something I'd be good at
But now we'll never know
But in case I'll go there
Every day
To make myself feel bad
There's a chance I'll start
To wonder
If this was the thing to do

automaticdoor

@automaticdoor PS, I'm convinced that T&S may never have had any happy relationships around the times they have written albums. Except I think they're both in relationships now? So maybe this album will be more upbeat??

sugar cubism

@automaticdoor THAT WHOLE ALBUM. I would walk around my neighborhood with that record on repeat just EXPERIENCING THE BREAKUP.

sarah girl

@automaticdoor GOD, all the Tegan and Sara songs.

wee_ramekin

@Sarah H. Yeah, "The Con" (the song specifically, the album as well) gets me every time.

Though the circumstances of my relationship were not the same as Tegan's, that palpable mixture of confusion/pain/love/obsession that she feels in that song was all to familiar.

Decca

What about up-tempo / dancey break-up songs? Prince's When You Were Mine is a great one.

sugar cubism

@Decca And just recently Robyn's Dancing On My Own.
That's not a tear that's sweat!!!!!! FROM DANCING.

rebecca@twitter

@sugar cubism I have this pet theory that Adele and Robyn perform the same service to society, except that Adele is for crying your heart out in your dorm room, and Robyn is for going out and drinking until you're too wasted to remember why you should be crying.

frigwiggin

Ooh ooh, Julieta Venegas? "Me Voy" kills me.

No voy a llorar y decir que no merezco esto
Porque es probable que
Lo merezco pero no lo quiero

wee_ramekin

@frigwiggin Have you heard "Ojalá", by Silvio Rodriguez?

"Ojalá pase algo que te borre de pronto:
Una luz cegadora, un disparo de nieve...
Ojalá por lo menos que me lleve la muerte
Para no verte tanto
Para no verte siempre
En todos lo segundos
En todas la visiones...
Ojalá que no pueda tocarte ni en canciones."

Two-Headed Girl

Also also, Rural Alberta Advantage's "Don't Haunt This Place":

"I know it's right, I know it's okay/And I'd like to see you now and again/This was hard it was dumb we should do it again/give ourselves some time, ten years from the day"

sugar cubism

Perhaps too cliche to mention, but "I can't make you love me" is a wrencher. Sing it Bonnie. I KNOW.

ALSO, some folk songs really get it too. "Iowa" by Dar Williams, for instance. "Bodily" by Ani DiFranco.

Also, "Maybe So" by Low Anthem.

And "Against All Odds" too. Phil has been there, he really has.

OK FINE I'm corny but my feelings are really real.

emkay

@sugar cubism AGH AGAINST ALL ODDS!!! That came on the radio during a particularly low day, and I had to pull into a parking lot to cry. "You're the only one who ever knew me at allll". PHIIILLL!!!

redheaded&crazy

@sugar cubism well i definitely listen to the most melodramatic crap breakup songs

BUT MY FEELINGS ARE REALLY REAL TOOOO (great line)

baklava!

@sugar cubism Ugh so many Bonnie Raitt tears I have cried.

han
han

@sugar cubism YES to Bonnie Raitt. Adele recently did a cover of it too and ugh, ugh, feelings.

PoBoyNation

@sugar cubism Yesss. I'm going to see Bonnie Raitt this weekend and fully expect to be in full-on tears during this and "Angel from Montgomery."

CharethCutestory

@emkay That makes me think of that rad This American Life ep (The Breakup) wherein Starlee Kine talks to Phil Collins about that song, and writes a breakup song of her own. One of the best episodes!!

lindsayishere

Too many Okkervil River songs (they have a special brand of verbose melodrama that complements 20-something heartbreak oh so well), but particularly "Song of Our So-Called Friend":
"Loving is as loving does, and I'd say we should know because we both have loved, have lost, and are alone. Your face's falling tears, to me they're lovely and they're dear, though you don't love me and it's clear that I will never see you in my arms. There's no room in your heart for even this finely-sharpened dart; although I had started to think there might be hope, it isn't so."

So, so many tears shed to that damn song.

frigwiggin

By the way, these songs are all going on the Megaplaylist of Moony Sadness. All of them.

SarahP

@frigwiggin I lost my equivalent of that playlist a couple years ago and I am still bummed that I can't recreate it properly.

frigwiggin

@SarahP Yeah, old mixtapes/playlists create many, many feelings in me. I'm hoping the Megaplaylist (when I actually take the dang time to put it together) will not replace any of those, but will be a good-quality playlist of multiple-days'-worth of sad, sad songs. Because my heart, she needs a-squeezin'.

DickensianCat

You say you packed my things
And divided what was mine--you're off to the mountain top
I say her skinny legs could use sun
But now I'm wishing
For my best impression
Of my best Angie Dickinson
But now I've got to worry
Cause boy you still look pretty
When you're putt the damage on.

--Tori Amos, Putting the Damage On. One day I will be able to listen to this song without crying. But not today.

anachronistique

@DickensianCat No one's picking up the phone, guess it's clear that he's gone...

nonvolleyball

@DickensianCat, @anachronistique you guys, this is so great--DH@twitter was talking about Northern Lad the other day in the Breaking Up is Hard to Do with Dignity thread, & BattyRabbit jumped in to mention Putting the Damage On. Tori has some of the best breakup music.

(my vote was for Hey Jupiter, although I must confess that it was Tear in your Hand that helped me through being dumped by my first real boyfriend when I was 13. we never even kissed, though, so in retrospect I'm not sure that deploying the Tori was really necessary.)

anachronistique

@nonvolleyball See, I think Tear in Your Hand is on the "I am finally feeling okay and will survive" end of the spectrum rather than the "soaking my pillow every night" end like the other two.

sceps yarx

@nonvolleyball In my experience, when you're 13, deploying the Tori is ALWAYS necessary.

DickensianCat

@nonvolleyball, @anachronistique Tori is the "breakup music" champ. We've got Tear in Your Hand, Northern Lad, Hey Jupiter, Putting the Damage On, Baker Baker, what else? I think I wrote some Hey Jupiter lyrics to my HS ex-boyfriend once in a desperate ploy to show him HOW EMOTIONAL I was feeling: sometimes I breathe you in, and I KNOW, YOU KNOW! I'm turning red now.

DH@twitter

@nonvolleyball

Ugh I am talking about it today too. /one trick pony

I'm not even having a break-up! I think that song gets me because it makes me think about what it would be like to feel that creeping sense of dread about the relationship and it makes me think of times when I have wondered if things should end.

Anyway.

nonvolleyball

@DH@twitter there's no such thing as too much talking about the greatness & emotionality of Tori. I wanted to jump in & mention Northern Lad, but figured I'd give you credit instead. :)

@DickensianCat--yes, Baker Baker!!! I knew there was something good off of UtP but I kept thinking of Bells for Her & Yes, Anastasia (which are also wonderful breakup songs, but more about the dissolution of a friendship than a romance). I luhhhhrve Hey, Jupiter (used to know how to play it on the piano, even), & I was obsessed with how you can hear her lick her lips in between "I know" & "you know" in that line. the remix on the single with all the dark, brooding strings & drum machine was also my (melodramatic) jam back in the day.

& while we're throwing out good Tori/breakup songs..."Cooling" is pretty fantastic as well.

TheDragon

Honestly the one song that still gets me isn't a breakup song, but "our song," which is "Free" by Zac Brown Band. Instead of singing "We'll live out of our old van, travel all across this land, you and me" He'd sing "We'll live out of my old truck, Till we just run outta luck"

Roxanne Rholes

@The Kendragon Zac Brown Band pretty much makes you want to either party or bawl your eyes out. There is no in between. "She'd trade Colorado if he'd take her with him, closes the door before the winter lets the cold in, and wonders if her love is strong enough to make him stay. She's answered by the tail lights shining through the window pane."

Every time, my reaction is: "you BASTARD!"

TheDragon

@Roxanne Rholes
This is so true. There concerts are like emotional roller coasters with really fantastic fiddle playing

phlox

Really any version of Goodbye will do it but Emmylou Harris is the best in many ways so here is her cover.
"I only miss you every now and then," especially, when you're at that point where you really really want that to be true.

dj pomegranate

@phlox I <3 Emmylou all the time so much <3.

PoBoyNation

@phlox Oh, man, for real. Steve Earle knows how to express some regrets.

But I recall
all of them nights down in Mexico
one place I may never go
in my life again.

in-in

"Motorcycle Drive By" - Third Eye Blind
"Tear In Your Hand" - Tori Amos
"Dress Up In You" - Belle and Sebastian

In chronological order of heartbreaks. Haha.

SarahP

@in-in "There are pieces of me you've never seen." ahhhhh

nonvolleyball

@SarahP my favorite was always "I know I know you well, well, better than I used to."

alpelican

@in-in Motorcycle Drive By! Oh god, I'm 13 again

in-in

oh i completely forgot i also bawled my head off to "tea and sympathy" by jars of clay. what is with me and broken glasses?

DH@twitter

@in-in

Oh my god that reminded me (for reasons I haven't thought about in ages): "Champagne High" by Sister Hazel. Aaaaaagh.

frigwiggin

Oh man, so it's not a super-sad song, but when I saw Jonathan Coulton live a few years ago he played "I Hate California" (which went over very well since it was in San Francisco), and afterwards he gave this little wry smile and said, "It's about a girl...it's always about a girl." And with that, he broke my heart a little bit.

singstrix

@frigwiggin I am hella late to this discussion (I left the tab open on my work computer) -- JoCo's "When You Go" makes me cry during breakups (even if I'm the one leaving), when people die, just.. all the time. Less now than it used to.

cmonster

Can I just suggest "Youth," by Daughter?

"Shadows settle on the place, that you left.
Our minds are troubled by the emptiness.
Destroy the middle, it's a waste of time.
From the perfect start to the finish line.

And if you're still bleeding, you're the lucky ones.
'Cause most of our feelings, they are dead and they are gone.
We're setting fire to our insides for fun.
Collecting pictures from the flood that wrecked our home,
It was a flood that wrecked this...

... and you caused it... "

Actually, that whole album. Heartbreaking. I listened to it daily (to torture myself?).

loudmouthedgirl

@cmonster Good call! I just came across them last week, and gaaah. It has been two years!! since the ex and I broke up, and that still gave me a twinge. But the song is so good that I can't stop listening to it.

cmonster

@loudmouthedgirl It IS so good! Maybe that's why I end up torturing myself. I can't stop either!

FutureCatLady

"Train in Vain" by the Clash always helps me during a breakup. ALWAYS.

SarahP

It turns out I have many opinions on sad songs.

Olivia2.0

Also, Interpol. All of it. All the time. Most of it is pretty nonsensical but you can make it mean WHATEVER YOU WANT. I am also all over this thread. Apparently I am full of break up song opinions.

Bittersweet

If after a breakup you want to swoonily dance around your house, singing at the top of your lungs while you're crying your eyes out, Bryan Ferry and the guys have got you covered.

dj pomegranate

I sleep with my hands across my chest,
And I dream of you with someone else--
I feed my body with things that I don't need,
Until I sink to the bottom...
(Maximo Park, Going Missing)

Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

teandthorazine

@dj pomegranate This song was the soundtrack to my life for about a year of post-breakup, post-graduation drunken stupid desperate behaviour. Gah. So. Many. Tears.

Decca

Confession: I've never actually gone through a "proper" break-up cause I've never been in a real lasting relationship, but so many of these songs are already my favourites. God help me whenever I do experience a terrible break-up.

Verity

@Decca My current boyfriend is my first boyfriend ever. I have morbidly imagined listening to certain songs if we ever break up, and how upsetting they would be.

sparrow303

Oh man, my best friend is SO good at making mixes like this! Every time I get my heart smashed, she makes me a new one. From her archives:

"Hours pass/ and she still counts the minutes that I am not there/ I swear I never meant for it to feel like this--" ("Bruised" by Jack's Mannequin)

"If you don't love me let me go.... And I am a writer, a writer of fictions/ I am the heart that you call home/ I've written pages upon pages/ trying to rid you from my bones..." ("Engine Driver" by the Decemberists)

-->Importantly: Feel better songs!

Jim Croce, "One Less Set of Footsteps" ("If that's the way that you want it/ oh that's the way I want it more/ cuz there'll be one less set of footsteps on your floor/ in the morning")

Cloud Cult, "Hurricane and Fire Survival Guide": (this one deserves spacing!!)

"I've had enough of hiding underneath my covers
I'm done with all of that poop that brings me down...
I will laugh my way through hurricanes and fire
That's why you don't wanna bring me down"

-->Also in the feel-better category: "Moab" by Conor Oberst; "Unless It's Kicks" by Okkervil River; "I Feel Better" by Frightened Rabbit; "Swim" by Ani DiFranco.

dj pomegranate

@fishiefishfish Yes to the Okkervil and Frightened Rabbit for the feel-better category. "Swim Until you Can't See Land" is also a great one that gave me some post-breakup momentum.

iwearaFEZnow

@fishiefishfish The best faking-it feel better song ever (at least in my opinion): Someone New on My Mind by Lex Land. It's such a "no really, i've got my shit together" mess!

sarah.@twitter

@fishiefishfish Oh my god, "Engine Driver"! there were several months after my high school heartbreak when I was never not playing that song.

sparrow303

@sarah.@twitter I cannot play that one, not for now. Toooo close to home.

sandwiches

@fishiefishfish One Less Set of Footsteps! And Lover's Cross!!

sandwiches

@fishiefishfish One Less Set of Footsteps! And Lover's Cross!!

shumacumlaude

Bon Iver's "Skinny Love." (I told you to be patient, I told you to be fine, I told you to be balanced, I told you to be kind. Now all your love is wasted? Then who the hell was I?)
My best friend in college would play a cover of this at an open mics occasionally... she debuted it just a couple weeks after my Irish boyfriend told me to cancel the plane tickets to Dublin I had received as a Christmas gift and then went M.I.A. Oof.

EpWs

@shumacumlaude Oh god, Bon Iver.

Kerri Mercury Morris@facebook

@shumacumlaude I'm in a super happy relationship and I still can't even deal with this song.

cinnamonskin

@shumacumlaude When asking my bff for emergency breakup help, my text was simply "I've gone all Bon Iver" and was greeted immediately with wine and pie. Maybe Bon Iver's albums should come with wine and pie? (uron & Wine & Pie party?)

karion

I used to have this theory about breakups and music.

You start at the weepy stage - this is Sarah McLachlan territory (NB - this is a theory from the 90s, so the musical choices here have some dust. This is Adele territory now.)

You go on to the angry stage, and here you have your Alanis, your Fiona Apple, etc.

Some detour briefly into the revenge stage. I never hung out there long, but enjoyed such tunes as "Doncha Wish Your Girlfriend Was Hot Like Me" by the Pussycat Dolls during such sojourns.

In the end, you find your way to acceptance, which, for me, was firmly Sheryl Crow and 10,000 Maniacs territory. Wistful, you look back fondly, but have no desire to go back down that road. Once you get to Sheryl Crow country, you're home free.

I think Magnetic Fields are a fantastic addition to Sheryl Crow country.

sceps yarx

@karion Ah, yes, Sheryl Crow.

If you could only see
What love has made of me
Then I'd no longer be in your mind
The difficult kind
'Cuz babe I've changed.

iwearaFEZnow

@sceps yarx oof. that just took me back to my first high school break-up. and my eyes getting all wide on the metro as i decided that This Song Is My Life.

Hot Doom

Oh boy, I just wish that Gotye's 'Somebody that I used to know' had been out when I underwent my massive series of breakups with the same guy over 2009-10, but now I can listen to it and smile every time Kimbra starts singing.
Instead, I lay face down convulsing and crying into a pillow while listening to 'Obsessions' by Marina and the Diamonds
We've got obsessions/I wanna wipe out all the sad ideas/that come to me/when I am holding you

Waaaaaah!
Also, I mashed that up with "You broke my heart" by Lavender Diamond, for obvious reasons.

RK Fire

@LolaLaBalc: Kimbra's part makes the song.

frigwiggin

I'm kind of sad that Beck's Sea Change doesn't do it for me like it used to--I loved it when I was just out of high school and listened to it over and over while boxing up the house so my parents could move to Washington (and my mom was like, "why are you listening to that depressing stuff???" and put on some Harry Belafonte), but now it kind of falls flat. :(

george glass

@frigwiggin Lol at your mom's response.

frigwiggin

@george glass Yeah, she's great.

"Paper Tiger" is really the only song from the album that's stood up for me. Especially the end.

There's one road to the morning
There's one road to the truth
There's one road back to civilization
But there's no road back to you

nonvolleyball

"Breakdown" by Mariah Carey/Bone Thugz'n'Harmony is surprisingly poignant if you listen closely--I'm not the hugest MC fan, but she writes her own songs & is pretty underrated as a lyricist. & I mayyyyy have listened to that song on repeat a whole lot during my freshman year of college.

Reginal T. Squirge

@nonvolleyball Steadybreakinmeon downnnn

breadtwinkle

Does anyone else put on Wu-Tang's "36 Chambers" when they've had a terrible day? I swear by it.

ihatethallium

Yo La Tengo: "I was the fool beside you for too long."

fondue with cheddar

@ihatethallium Yes, I can relate to that. Great song.

frigwiggin

So take whatever you'd like
I'll strike like the States on fire
You won't sleep very tight
No hiding
No safe covers
Make your bed and now lie
Just like you always do
You can fake it for the papers but I’m onto you
I’m onto you, I'm onto you, I'm onto you

frigwiggin

@frigwiggin

So go ahead and talk about your bad day
I want all the details of the pain and misery
That you are inflicting on the others
I consider them my sisters and I'd like their numbers

Maja D.@twitter

@frigwiggin
I'd love to have you up and see the place
I'd like to do more than survice, I'd like to RUB IT IN YOUR FACE

discombobulated

@frigwiggin Yes! I love "Truce" so much. I love how it starts with "okay, we're going to solve this like grown-ups and split up the universe evenly" and devolves into "FUCK YOUUUU".

Have you ever heard "Colorblind"? I think it's from their first EP -- anyway it's another great breakup song.
And I loved you in bright orange
And in violet and in green
And I loved you in such colors
As your eyes have never, ever seen
And I loved the way you acted
But your one-trick pony's dead
And I loved you unprotected
But you only love in
Red

frigwiggin

@discombobulated I haven't! I am going to go look for it now. Basically everything AFP touches turns to gold.

submarine

@frigwiggin Also 'Boston', which I always think of as like a sequel to 'Truce' - very similar mood/sentiment.

I had Julian and Steve
You had Julia and Jeanette
You wear your terror on your sleeve for all the men i haven't met (yet)
I had Oliver in Potsdam you had Eleanor in Amsterdam
We're keeping track so carefully we've missed the state we're in completely
Honestly your foot is out the door and i've got scores of offers elsewhere and keep both feet planted firmly in the air
And tomorrow you can totally erase me from your mind but trust me everything is fine

fondue with cheddar

My last boyfriend loved The Magnetic Fields, and I wanted to like them but just couldn't get into them. I've got this thing where the timbre of certain voices make me ill, and that one dude's voice is one of them. He made a mix CD for me early in our relationship, and it was full of music that was good but just made me uncomfortable, sprinkled with music that was good but somber (his favorite band is Low), which only made me feel worse about the bad voices. The mix CD I made for him was mostly upbeat and happy. Maybe I should have taken that as a sign.

sceps yarx

@jen325 My husband made me mixes all the time when we were dating, and he still makes them for me. And almost every single one of them has a Magnetic Fields song. And an Eels song. Also the Low and the P J Harvey and the Swans and all that oh god crying yourself to sleep stuff. Aaaaaand, I love it all the way down in the depths of my black, black heart!

fondue with cheddar

@sceps yarx I like that stuff too! But I have to be in the mood for it. Since a long bout of depression a few years ago my tolerance for such music is less than it used to be, which is a shame.

My biggest problem with his mix was the voice thing, which sort of sullied the whole disc for me.

Glasses

Ahhhh! I finally registered to comment because OH MY GOD this is relevant to my life and everything is all about me. Me and my guy of 3 years broke up in March, and a few weeks later I went to see the Magnetic Fields with my pal for my birthday (we'd bought the tix before the breakup). My ex taught me to play uke, and we used to play Magnetic Fields songs for each other all the time (especially Book of Love!). An hour in to the show I'm sobbing silently to all the bittersweetness of their music and had to leave. I only just picked up my uke the other day for the first time since the breakup and *didn't* cry. Step by step...

EpWs

Ooh, this was a bad one--"Anatomy of a Tidal Wave" by Cold.

I can't believe it was the calm that killed the storm

Inside you broke my heart and took a little piece of me
Maybe one day we'll try again
But it won't ever be the same

sceps yarx

P J Harvey for when you are in a really black place. I love her White Chalk album.

BattyRabbit

@sceps yarx Oooooh White Chalk. Haunted by ghost lovers! Perfect.

willpie@twitter

Of note: this applies to like 9 out of 10 Magnetic Fields songs.

kvetina

"park that car, drop that phone/ sleep on the floor, dream about me"

not necessarily sad or break-up related, but the song is so beautiful and it just perfectly embodies how i feel about every boy who hasn't returned my ~feelingz~. makes my heart clench.

frigwiggin

@kvetina Oh wow--my boyfriend put a techno-y song with those lyrics on a mixtape he made me aaaages ago, and I had no idea they were part of another song! Weird.

terrific

Every song on Stars "In Our Bedroom, After The War," but especially the last two, "Today Will Be Better, I Swear!" and the title song.

Holy.
Fuck.

"Say good morning to that sleepy person lying next to you
If there’s no one there, then there’s no one there
But at least the war is over"

That whole CD makes me want to sit outside chain smoking and crying, which is what I did, for hours on end, after my last break-up.

frigwiggin

@terrific I listened to this on the drive to Berkeley the other night! It didn't do it for me as much as I'd hoped (the whole thing kind of sounded like songs from a sad musical? Which usually I'd love so I don't know what's up), but I did adore "Barricade."

Hot Doom

@terrific yep yep yep
'The night starts here' still makes my chest seize up a little.

viola bruise

One day in college my boyfriend and I went record shopping and I bought some Leonard Cohen records. We came home and I put on Songs of Leonard Cohen and my boyfriend started crying during "So Long Marianne" and dumped me while "That's No Way to Say Goodbye" was playing. I was so confused as to why my life suddenly was a movie that I don't even think I realized I was being dumped until the record stopped playing.

sceps yarx

@viola bruise ACK that is terrible! It's one thing to break up with you, it's another thing to ruin the Leonard Cohen record you just bought!

Glasses

@viola bruise Totally had my college boyfriend break up with me by playing me a Crosby Stills and Nash almbum and after one particular song being like 'That's us'. SO SAD.

Kulojam

@viola bruise Aw man, that's awful! Kind of related: my previous boyfriend and I had been dating about a month when we were listening to Dar Williams "Iowa" and we BOTH teared up - about other people. We didn't end it then, not for another year, but damn that shoulda been a Sign, you know? I guess it isn't so bad being someone's rebound when he's you're rebound, too, but that was a yuck breakup.

dj pomegranate

The first time my heart was truly, truly, for real, broken in two was freshman year of college, which was when MTVu was playing Evanescence approximately once every 6 minutes in the gym I went to every morning:

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase.

Perfect treadmill music! (*SOB*) To this day 12 years later I can't hear this song without feeling a wave of melancholy.

Slutface

"January, The One With Kid" by Local H.
I listened to it 24/7 when my ex of four years and I broke up. We still had to live together for four months after because neither of us could afford to break the lease. This line always kills me: "So now which one is the owner Of the friends we made together? And how do we divide a city And the bars where we drank forever?"

Chris H.

God, I really thought I was doing ok until I read that...

reebs14

Because I have an unfortunate tendency to drag out things which need to be ended quickly: Oh! Darling, the Beatles. "If you leave me/ I'll never make it alone/ Believe me when I beg you/ Don't ever leave me alone."

Sigh.

baklava!

While my first love was dumping me--like right in the middle of the conversation--"Don't Speak" by No Doubt came on the radio, and the coincidence was so ridiculous I actually laughed. And then for like five straight years every time I heard it I had a tiny panic attack.

Megasus

@baklava! I just ate some of you for lunch. And it was delicious.

lizkimballet

@baklava! omg. I am so sorry. I love no doubt so much and would not want that song to be tarnished. Especially by a first love! internet hug!

entangled

So I am maybe just wired oddly, or haven't had the right life experiences, but breakup songs never really resonate with me. What KILLS me every time are songs about getting older, and getting lost in the passage of time. I cannot even listen to Cats in the Cradle without misting up, and Landslide? Forget about it.

wee_ramekin

@arrr starr "Father and Son", by Cat Stevens, makes me so sad. Even as a little lonely seven year-old, I would think about it in the context of my mother and I, and I would just get so, so sad.

okaycrochet

@arrr starr OLD FRIENDS SIMON AND GARFUNKEL OH GOD WHY
"how terribly strange to be seventy" and then that cello AAAAAAAAA

BuffyBot

I'm really into the album "Pillow Talk" by Wild Child right now. It's a beautiful album musically and the lyrics are haunting and dark...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s63sbYYJHF4
I listened to it linked on facebook, which I never do, but I'm so glad I did...

the angry little raincloud

Uh. This is what I'm listening to. On repeat.
http://youtu.be/9Ngjv6sEXKU
I am living up to my name. And clearly not over anyone.

Hot Doom

@the angry little raincloud Wow. That is the greatest.

anachronistique

FUCK YOU and your untouchable face
and FUCK YOU for existing in the first place

Kulojam

@anachronistique 18 and dumped: the perfect time to discover Ani (for me, anyway).

wee_ramekin

@anachronistique Can we talk about "So What"?

"I loved you so....what."

mabellegueule

@anachronistique THIS! Directed at someone I fell for so hard, but didn't even actually date so didn't even actually get to feel valid break-up feelings.

joie

chained to the wall of our room
yeah you chained me like a dog in our room
i thought that's how it was
i thought that we were fine
then the day was night
you were high you were high when i was doomed
and dying for with no light with no light

tied to my bed
i was younger then
i had nothing to spend but time on you
but it made me love it made me love it made me love more
it made me love it made me love it made me love more

do what you said the words she said left out
over unto the sky where i'll soon fly
and she took the time
to believe in to believe in what she said
and she made me love she made me love she made me love more
she made me love she made me love she made me love more

Love More - Sharon Van Etten

THIS SONG. repeated many times during my hellacious breakup last November. The Bon Iver cover is also excellent.

iwearaFEZnow

there ain't no freedom where we are
ain't no wishes in these stars
ain't no reason to believe

but don't worry baby, oh no, don't you worry
maybe this is what we need
a little bruising a little bleeding
some space that we can breathe in
some silence in between

so cry for me baby, and i'll cry for you...

Rubyinthedust

I just spent the past 45 minutes you tubing all these songs and feeling sad about my last breakup, which i hadn't felt sad about for at least 3 months. ugh.

sarah.@twitter

oh god, 100,000 Fireflies has been my whole life for like, years now. fuck you/love you, Stephen Merritt.

MollyculeTheory

This Mortal Coil - Song to the Siren. Even though I know in my logical brain it sounds like it belongs on some Enya Slow Moods compilation from the '90s, even when I am in a happy relationship that song can make me cry like a first breakup.

Anji

My all-time favorite breakup song? Harry Nilsson's "You're Breakin' My Heart". The chorus is literally the cheeriest-ever-sounding "You're breakin' my heart, you're tearin' it apart, so fuck you!"

I love the 70s.

werewolfbarmitzvah

My ex was a musician, so there was a LOT of stuff I couldn't listen to for a couple of years following that breakup. And even now with my love life all settled and cozy and unturbulent a hundred years later, I still break out in a cold sweat if I hear the Isley Brothers' "Footsteps in the Dark."

Verity

"River", by Joni Mitchell.

I'm so hard to handle
I'm selfish and I'm sad
Now I've gone and lost the best baby
That I ever had

If my boyfriend breaks up with me, I am going to need to tell people to keep me from listening to this.

Kerri Mercury Morris@facebook

"I Dream a Highway" by Gillian Welch. The most gut-wrenchingly sad song ever, and it goes on forever as to allow the listener to just get it all out.

Now give me some of what you're having
I'll take you as a viper into my head
A knife into my bed, arsenic when I'm fed
I dream a highway back to you.

Maja D.@twitter

As a very defensive-in-love kind of lady, I haven't had any really spectacular breakups. But I was fired that one time, and OH the breakup songs I repurposed. See: the Amanda Palmer quotes above.

Nonsynchronous

I love this thread, even reading some of these lyrics gives me sad shivers. Here are some of my sobbing songs:

"Put your hand on your heart and tell me it's all over, I won't believe it till you put your hand on your heart and tell me that we're through." - José Gonzalez, "Hand on Your Heart"

Adele, "First Love" (I couldn't pick a single lyric and it's pretty first relationship specific)

"Somehow everything I own smells of you, and for the tiniest moment it's all not true. Do the things that you always wanted to. Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do." - Snow Patrol, "You Could Be Happy"

"Just before our love got lost you said, 'I am as constant as the northern star,' and I said, 'Constant in the darkness, where's that at? If you want me I'll be in the bar.'" - Joni Mitchell, "A Case of You" (this is matched in sadness by "Both Sides Now," mostly because of the scene in Love Actually)

"I'll buy a magazine searching for your face, from coast to coast, or whatever I find my place. I'll track you on the radio and I'll sign your list in a different name, but as close as I get to you, it's not the same." - Rachael Yamagata, "The Reason Why"

Anything from the Once soundtrack, any slow Fiona Apple song, Feist's The Reminder, Annie Stela's Fool

singstrix

@Nonsynchronous noooo, some of the stuff on the Once soundtrack is so hopeful! (to me.) ((well, maybe just Falling Slowly.))

mabellegueule

"Someone Great" by LCD Soundsystem.

mabellegueule

@mabellegueule Also "Maps" by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs (they don't love you like I love you)

Creature Cheeseman

@mabellegueule Both of these always get me. I wish that we could talk about it, but there. that's the problem.

wee_ramekin

Agh, "Recessional" by Vienna Teng gets me every time.

I'm listening to it right now, and it's making my stomach clench reflexively against the Feelings.

phenylalanine

@wee_ramekin OH MY GOD RECESSIONAL. I realize this comment is like five days late, but that song has always made me sob uncontrollably, for no particular reason except for because it is SUCH a sad, beautiful song. So much Vienna Teng love, she is my favorite.

cinnamonskin

"Good". Better Than Ezra, and healthy doses of Aretha, Etta, Beyonce, and any other assorted divas who make you feel better about it all. Then back to "Citizen" by Broken Bells, and then Bon Iver, and then wake up and wonder where all the red wine is?

PoBoyNation

Don't forget me, don't forget me.
Make it easy on me just for a little while.
You know I think about you:
Let me know you think about me too.

apples and oranges

"Good Woman" by Cat Power is excellent when you know you have to leave someone that isn't good for you, as much as it hurts... "And this is why I am leaving
And this is why I can?t see you no more
This is why I am lying when I say
That I don't love you no more

"Braille" by Regina Spektor, which has maybe not much to do with breakups but is SO FUCKING SAD. Oh the number of tears I have shed to this song.

The album Dog Problems by the Format, I think, is a great emotion chart of post-breakup feelings... from really upset and wanting an explanation to saying, FUCK IT YALL, I am GOOD and if you don't want me anymore you can just LEAVE and I am OKAY WITHOUT YOU.
("If Work Permits" is this "peace out bitch" song and oh my god do I love it)

Jens Lekman also has some nice mopey songs, and I am a wee bit embarrassed to admit the Death Cab that has played in my moments of heartache.

But, "Graceland" by Paul Simon might be the number one heartbreak song. "Everybody sees you're blown apart, everybody feels the wind blow." Damn right, Paul.

Andrea K@twitter

@kangerine DOG PROBLEMS.

That album came out not all that long after the worst breakup of my entire life. Like, months of chain smoking and wandering deserted latenight streets weeping openly and generally being The Worst.

Oddly, about the same weekend it dropped my ex and I were sharing a hotel room so we could see another band for my birthday, because we'd decided my whole weepy jag didn't mean we shouldn't still hang out (spoiler: it actually did).

That album helped put a lot of things in perspective at a very necessary moment. And I will never not love "If Work Permits" because of it.

Love is speaking in code/it's an inside joke/love is coming home...

CharethCutestory

I just had to say I LOVE THE MAGNETIC FIELDS and they are one of my favorite bands and no one ever cares so this makes me SO HAPPY even though it's sad. I said it up yonder, but I'm seeing them again on Monday and I'm so stoked!! Stephin Merritt forever and ever!!

carolita

I love the Magnetic Fields, "Acoustic Guitar" for homeopathic treatment of broken hearts in amusing doses. I also love their song that ends with: "Love is like a bottle of gin, but a bottle of gin is not... like... love."

gkan

Cat Power, the xx, Lykke Li = instant breakup list #boom

wendybird

Cue the sobs and the Okkervil River please!!!

"And I hear that song sometimes and imagine us much more than friends -
like if we stayed in this town, bought the first house that went up on sale,
and how each Christmastime would bring in-laws and snowdays and holiday mail.
Your dad says you’re living in Georgia since last September...
Yeah...well, I’ve got dreams to remember"

submarine

She Sends Kisses by The Wrens:

Ten tons against me and you've gone
I put your favorite records on
And sit around
It spins around
And you're around again

particularly apt since it was my ex's favourite record.

Missgrova

You tell me to find someone else to love
Someone who loves me too
The way you used to do
But each time I go out with someone new
You walk by and I fall to pieces
*sob*

gem
gem

Regina Specktor's 'Samson' -

You are my sweetest downfall
I loved you first, I loved you first
Beneath the stars came fallin' on our heads
But they're just old light, they're just old light
Your hair was long when we first met

His hair really was long when we first met.

bocadelperro

I have to confess to turning the volume up on the Decemberists' "Engine Driver" and sob-singing my way through the chorus many many times. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HG1FlsgLQQY

revette

My two go to break up songs are I Know by Fiona Apple which once helpfully started playing while a guy was breaking up with me and Pigeons and Crumbs by Natalie Imbruglia.

Emily Murphy@twitter

when you can listen to all of "your ex-lover is dead" by stars without bawling.

singstrix

I broke up with a juicebox I'd been with for 8 years, Dec. 2010. Immediately upon leaving after one of our breakup talks, the radio assaulted me with:
- Joni Mitchell's 'River'
- Annie Lennox's 'Why'

SOB SOB SOB, you make me feel so bad but also I am a bad person, SOB

redonion

Gah, I don't even know if anyone's reading this anymore, but chiming in because it is kind of relevant to my day. I got dumped in October, and then 2 months later I made a giant music mix for my birthday party. We ended up not really listening to the mix because people were talking and drinking, etc. etc., and then I hadn't bothered to play the mix since then. So I went on a road trip last week and brought cds of the mix along, and as I'm sitting in the car, singing along with the songs with two of my friends, I am knocked over by the fact that these are serious and sad broken heart mixes. I was just hoping my friends didn't notice too much. This break up's post-break up misery was primarily accompanied by all things John Darnielle and Julie Doiron's "Consolation Prize" and, oh god, Thom Yorke's cover of "All For The Best" and all things Bill Callahan.

My first heart-crushing break up was accompanied by In the Aeroplane Over the Sea, and I still can't listen to that album without tearing up.

Lola P.
emkay

@Lola Mc. Thank you so much. Recent events has made this list relevant to my interests, and your kindness in compiling these means I can wallow without the hassle of making my own playlist.

rebecca@twitter

I am so late to this but after my first break up it was about six months Before I could listen toIf Winter Ends by Bright Eyes without crying.

And I fell for the promise of a life with a purpose
But I know that that is impossible now
And so I drink to stay warm
And to kill selected memories
Because I just can’t think anymore about that or about her tonight
I give myself three days to feel better
Or I swear I'll drive right off a fucking cliff
Because if I can’t learn to make myself feel better
Then how can I expect anyone else to give a shit?

Emo.

samjohn4810

I registered to comment solely based on the fact that I had I Don't Want To Get Over You song stuck in me head before I was even done reading this post. Shame-listening to this song on repeat? Been there. Whats the Best Adjustable Bed Brand

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