Thursday, March 15, 2012


Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, "Candy Candy"

It's true what she says about chewing!

The 19-year-old Japanese model-turned-fake-eyelashes-entrepreneur is also responsible for "Tsukematsukeru" and the unforgettable "PonPonPon."

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so it's gonna be that kind of day where i have "chewie, chewie, chewie chewie chewie" stuck in my head ... greeeat!

also, crazy coincidence, I totally wore this exact same outfit to work today~


@redheaded&crazy When you write "chewie" like that, it comes out in my head like Bruce Springsteen saying "wiggle" in the LMFAO parody.


i will buy candy tomorrow for the girl next my house! :D@y


$20 says the dancer in the mask is actually a dude. Oh yeah, seeing him walk, DEFINITELY a dude.
Also, did you know she is like, 17? So she is literally a baby.


@Megan Patterson@facebook I am glad someone else noticed this! Also, of that entire delightfully unhinged clusterfuck, I am the most puzzled by the toast in her mouth while she's running.


@hallelujah Well the toast is a metaphor for the toast that we all have hold in our mouths while we run.

H.E. Ladypants

@hallelujah It's anime/manga shorthand for "late for school." (Or work. Or wherever the character has to be in the morning.) The joke is that the character ran out of the door so fast, all they could do for breakfast was to grab a piece of toast and shove it in their mouths while they run.


@H.E. Ladypants This is actually quite reasonable! I don't know what it says about me that I was more perturbed by that than a singing onion, but here we are.

Ten Thousand Buckets

@H.E. Ladypants I've always called it a good luck charm (against being late for things). It doesn't generally work so well, as it is never applied until after the character is already late, but it must do some good, or Japanese people would have quit using it generations ago.


@Megan Patterson@facebook For sure. Those hands.


@Megan Patterson@facebook totally a dude!


@H.E. Ladypants This is very good information, thank you!!! Although it makes me wonder if there is some totally contextually reasonable explanation for the rest of the things that happen in this video, and then I'm not sure if I want there to be or not.


@Megan Patterson@facebook ...so what? Why does it matter?


@aliceandstuff It only matters in the sense that he is not passing for Kyary's doppleganger. Although he is working that dress.


@Megan Patterson@facebook He is not really intended to though, at least I doubt that was the original intention in Japan. Kigurumi (people, mostly men, dressing in anime masks) is a thing: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animegao

Sorry, I just get grumpy whenever people are making "zomg man in a dress lol" jokes.


Now is the time for this, right? http://www.hulu.com/watch/289406/saturday-night-live-j-pop-talk-show


What's with the asian girls recently and the "eyelash" model stuff? Remember that girl who busted that Peter guy who made up the fake asian gf? Wasn't she an eyelash model too? I think she was from Hong Kong right? Anyway, why so many eyelash models?


@saythatscool You need fake eyelashes to go with your anime contact lenses: http://www.youknowit.com/online-shop/anime-contact-lenses.cfm

ETA: or is "eyelash models" what you're calling them these days?


@Ophelia Yes! That's what I'm talking about. It's all this weird manga eye stuff where they're actually having surgeries to look like anime characters. That other Peter girl had actually had several facial surgeries to get her eyes rounder and bigger. Are there like Japanese sugardaddies that pay big time for that or something? So fascinating...
Thanks Ophelia! for that and the weird snl thing.


@saythatscool There is at least one fashion subculture where massive eyelashes are a thing -- they're called Agejo


@saythatscool Any time! I am oddly fascinated by this whole phenomenon, because I just. don't. get it. I mean, I love reading fantasy novels...but I haven't had ear surgery to look more like an elf.


@Megan Patterson@facebook Think it reminds them of the tentacles on an octopus? Those tentacle pornsters fetishize everything.


@saythatscool Nah, Japanese girls just love them some makeup


@saythatscool I would have surgery to look more like an anime character TODAY. When I was a kid, my grandparents brought me back a Sailor Moon coloring book from Japan and for awhile I tried to scotch tape the skin around my eyes to look more Asian. I didn't have a lot of supervision, obvs.


I think it's no so much people trying to look like anime characters, but that one aspect of the culture's idea of beauty is reflected in the art as well as the cosmetics. It's not crazy different from how some Indian people use skin lightener cream and some White people get breast/butt enhancements and some Black people relax their hair--just finding beauty in a racial feature that is not one's own.


@saythatscool Ooooh, boy. The whole "Asian eye surgery" bag of racial issues. I remember accusing my mom of getting it once when I was a kid. She was... not exactly pleased, but amused. Oh, "mongoloid" racial ancestry!


I'm won over by the singing onion. That's all.


@thisisunclear Exactly. The guy dancing in the creepy mask (because no Japanese women can pop and lock?) was getting me there, but the onion really won me over in the end.


@thisisunclear sprouting onion angel prince defs gives the whole thing a satisfyingly sinister vibe.


@thisisunclear I'm still trying to grasp the meaning of her shooting the pink machine dun at the sinking onion prince. I know there's something there.


@thisisunclear And then she shoots the onion with an machine gun? I love Japan.


Ah, I have to drive 5 hours today and all I'm going to sing the entire way is this song! Do you want my boyfriend to drive into a highway median, Hairpin? Because it seems like you do.


@metametadata chewie, chewie, chewie chewie chewie!

this song is so deep yo. these lyrics speak to me.

fondue with cheddar

@redheaded&crazy I would like to see a mashup between this song and Chewbacca videos.


I learned that the japanese word for candy, sweetie, and chewing are candy, sweetie, and chewing.

Also, I thought that teen pop stars have all been replaced by holograms in Japan? These seems like a step back.


@graffin Dr. Algernop Krieger is displeased.


@saythatscool Those holograms are way to famous to ever date him.



We're goin' back to the Shadows again!
Out where an Indian's your friend!
Where the vegetables are green,
And you can pee right into the stream!
(And that's important!)
We're goin' back to the Shadows again


"Krieger-san! My cherry blossoms are wilting..."

"Oh, you are just your mother all over again. We will talk about this in the van."


@melis All ashore from the SS Date Rape! Toot toot!


Well, this is just rolling probable cause.


@melis Vanispheres! Noooo!


I love this. That onion is my favorite thing ever.

But I also need someone to explain it to me?

hahahaha, ja.

The song sounds like something out of a Kirby game! :D
Oh god THE EYES! D:
Oh god THE ONION!!!! :D


Quick! Let's all learn the dance routine! In our homes and offices!


Dear Japan, I love you so much. Do you love me too? [] yes []no xoxoxox martinipie

The Mythical Codfish

I...am so confused right now. I have no idea what that was about, or what I'm supposed to make of it. I haven't been this confused since I watched "Week-End" on a bucketful of cold meds.


@The Mythical Codfish
I suggest PonPonPon for more confusion!


Edith, you truly do yeoman's work on the J- and K-Pop beat. Truly.


@Clare Let's do the new BigBang video next!


Now I'm clicking through every. single. one. of the related videos that pop up on full blast in my ear buds and it's actually quite delightful to work to.


Japanese music videos! I saw a great one at a convention last year that was like a murder mystery, and I think there was a vampire? And one of the guys just changed wigs a lot. Cinematic.


I love the onion king!

And the "candy candy candy candy candy" line is almost literally what happens in my brain every time it's dessert time.


i... i... i don't know how i feel about this. except i kept thinking, katy perry, take a lesson. super hyper cute pinkness + creepy = BETTER


I get the same feeling watching this video that I get walking into the Hello Kitty Café here in Seoul. Its so alienating to see that much pink in one room that it starts to feel somehow Brechtian and then I begin to enjoy myself... the way that one enjoys picking a scab.


@Carrie_Grasshopper *books flight to Seoul*


Just FYI, Ponponpon is EXCELLENT at distracting screaming babies. Even though they know literally nothing about the world and everything is new to them, they still get WTF looks on their tiny faces. I'll have to try thins one as well, because I definitely so candy love.

I'm Right on Top of that, Rose

This really is one of those "the more I learn about the world, the less I feel like I know" moments.


Don't worry, I have painstakingly extracted the most important part.


fondue with cheddar

@Iananan The scene in which she defeats the level boss!


@jen325 exactly.


The Pon Pon Pon post was one of the things that made me start regularly reading the Hairpin. I could never risk missing such a gem again! In fact I've freaked out/annoyed every single one of my friends with that music video. The fat dancing lady with the raspberry head!!!

fondue with cheddar

I've always wondered—in a youth-obsessed culture like Japan, how does one transition into adulthood? I've never seen grown Japanese women dressing like little girls. The US is obsessed with youth too, but it's more teens and college age, which aren't as far removed from adulthood.

(Not to say that college students aren't adults, college 'Pinners. But you and I both know that many of your peers are pretty immature. But you aren't!)


I watched PonPonPon in a class a few weeks ago and I was the only one, save for my professor that seemed to enjoy the madness. So excited for Cute in Japan week.


I really don't enjoy Kyary Pamyu Pamyu's videos, but she has the BEST commercials on tv in Japan advertising pudding. She's dressed up as pudding and does a little dance at a bored old man in a meeting until he dances along, then she busts out the crazy eyes and wiggles her fingers menacingly at him. Then she takes a bite of pudding.

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