The League of Ordinary Ladies: Soup and Pedicures

@one cow. Esp without a question mark. That made it perfect.

P.S. I am eating at my desk too. Snap Pea Crisps aka "Snack Salad."

@one cow @punkahontas Apparently ladies love staying late at work, eating, and not actually doing work, because I am drinking a white wine spritzer (ugh, it's all I could find in the kitchen) and some dried blueberries right now…and completely not getting anything done. Oops!

@punkahontas I eat the entire thing of Snapea Crisps "snack salad" (what??) without even noticing. Like, they are gone before I even bought them. Before I even saw them in the store.

@apb This is why I always buy two bags at once!

@apb Yes! I don't allow myself to eat them out of the bag or I'll eat the whole bag.

And no, I don't think it's mean–she invites herself over otherwise, which is the pinnacle of rudeness.

@punkahontas I know, I love her use of punctuation.

@wasabi peas Or MRSA! MRSA collects in the drain no matter how much you clean and it can KILL YOU. Remember when Paula Abdul had to wear that arm brace on American Idol? (oh it can also collect on literally anything else in the nail salon) Omg, shudders. And it's so hard to find a nail salon that uses lovely garbage bag lined bins.

@Loz oh my goodness, I live in terror of MRSA everytime I get a pedicure. Also foot fungus, because getting rid of that is just as terrifyingly difficult.

@wasabi peas Noooooo!!!! I have never had a pedicure and now I never can. I'll just have to add it to an ever growing list of neuroses. Disease. At the nail salon. Eeeeiiiiiiii!

@velcrosneakers I just wrote the exact same thing. Because I agree! More comixxx pleassseeee!

@Nina Kauffman@twitter They are my favorite too! I get so excited when I see a new one.

@littlegirlblue I don't think she was poking fun at the disadvantaged people. She is simply taking a humorous stance on the fact that she logically wasn't expecting beauty class and a pedicure to take place in a soup kitchen.

@littlegirlblue I mean, if the author were really poking fun at "the Poors," wouldn't she have turned around and left as soon as she saw the unsavory locale? and, getting a wax in a place where most residents couldn't imagine indulging in such a luxury certainly isn't something to be ashamed of, but i wouldn't brag about it, either.
Pointing out something you disagree with in a post is no big, but we've done SO well at not being mean here. Maybe we should also avoid sarcasm when we want to express frustration with an author?

Perhaps someone living in Jerusalem is entitled to use the word "ghetto" any way they choose?

@littlegirlblue – I don't generally get tweaked by stuff like this, but the widespread use of "ghetto" to mean down-at-the-heels or jury-rigged bothers me.

@Guy DeBr0'd @Ham Snadwich Wow, I never knew the true meaning of the word "ghetto" until now. I always assumed ghetto referred more to the place itself than a statement about the people who live there. Thanks, 'Pinners, for prompting me to question the meaning and look it up. I don't think I'll be using that word anymore.

@littlegirlblue I really love these comics and was also bummed to see "ghetto" being use. For anyone who is interested, here's a good article on the subject: ‘Ghetto:’ Five Reasons to Rethink the Word.

@Ham Snadwich That's not what the word ghetto means here. It means a very closed -in place where a beauty school end up being in a soup kitchen.

@littlegirlblue – Sure.

@Kitten Mittens I don't see where she was rude, or complaining. I just read it as describing the experience and the location. It's the same thing that happens in every other comic. Perhaps you're just uncomfortable with talking about less pleasant economic areas? I think it's really funny, actually: getting a pedicure in a sketchy place with a bunch of old Russian women. I mean, it makes a difference what the place is like. People going near your feet with cutting tools and such.

@Kitten Mittens I read it as more relating "here's this thing that happened to me, and it was totally bizarre!" because let's be honest, it is! If a friend of yours invited you out to get a free pedicure, and then it turned out to be in a building that was primarily a soup kitchen and you had garbage bags lining the foot soaking thing, would you not then totally relate it to your friends as this absurd, surreal thing that happened one time? I would!

Or hey, maybe you're all totally PC in your head all the time, and would be thinking it was completely not weird at all or funny or worth telling your friends about. I don't know your life. But I don't think we have to call it all in bad taste just because it was a funny story that peripherally involves (and is not making fun of) poor people.

@Kitten Mittens I see where you're coming from – like, it's funny, but part of the funny comes from "omg there were black people there and they were poor," which squicks me out a little. Hopefully the Hairpin is the kind of space where we can say, Hey that was a little classist!, and not get called too sensitive or "PC," personally my least favorite conservative shut-down word.

@Julia Gazdag: I'm absolutely uncomfortable with an author using her Internet platform to essentially mock poor people. I think we totally agree on the point of the comic, which as far as I can tell, is the following: "And the pedicures were being offered near a soup kitchen. Can you BELIEVE they wanted me to avail myself of a free service NEAR POOR PEOPLE?" And then I guess elderly Russian women are hysterical by virtue of their…age and ethnicity?

@SarahDances: I don't think this is about being "all totally PC in [my] head." For one thing, I think there's a big difference between Esther sharing this story with friends, and publishing it on the Internet (presumably for payment, but if for nothing else, publicity for her work), especially on a website that encourages thoughtful discussion about women's issues.

@Kitten Mittens I was uncomfortable with "Also some disabled people!" But this comic is generally so funny that I'm hoping this was an honest I-didn't-realize-that-was-offensive mistake. Looking forward to more!

@SarahDances I get that this is a funny little incident, but I think there would have been a funnier way to relate the story. You can't really call something "totally ghetto" and make jokes about "some disabled people" without sounding like an asshole.

@Kitten Mittens I try to be very sensitive to issues of privilege & class on the internet, but I really don't see how she's mocking anyone in the second comic. if she'd *left*–if it was about "oh god it was so gross can you imagine"–I'd completely understand, & share, your discomfort.

but she stayed. & enjoyed it! as it's presented, it just seems to be narrating the contrast between typical settings for a pedicure & this unusual scenario. I mean, if anything, it's an endorsement for this place (even though it's not named by name).

@klibberfish that language is a bit problematic, but I felt that it was saved by the tone–I could hear it in a very real "I'm just trying to describe this odd thing & I don't want to sound mean" kind of voice (even the way it's kind of shoehorned in there suggests self-consciousness.)

I don't know why I'm so passionate about defending this comic, but I'm frequently squicked out about the social implications of stuff like this, & in this instance, it's not tripping my alarm.

@Kitten Mittens, @klibberfish While I get the construct of oh how wacky and unexpected it all was, the full-throttle squick of "some disabled people" really got to me. I'm disabled, and let me tell you, it is hiiiilarious when I get pedicures. Did I mention I'm psychologically disabled, so it's even funnier when the aesthetician doesn't know that I can hear her thoughts while she's waxing my eyebrows? Pure comedy gold.

I mean, I guess I just totally don't see where this is making jokes about poor, old, and disabled people. Like, saying "I went to get a pedicure, and there were these people there that I didn't expect to be there, and it was kind of weird, but whatever!" just doesn't smack of mocking to me. (See for reference in the comic: "And why not" "No biggie!")

@SarahDances: But the phrases "And why not!" "No biggie!" are part of what seem so mocking to me. Why is it "kind of weird" to do something near a soup kitchen? Or have elderly Russian women nearby? Or disabled people (didn't mention that one in my first few posts, but, yeah, that mention is awful)?

@nonvolleyball But that's the thing…just the act of describing the place and clientele as "odd" is, in itself, quite mean. If the whole joke is how much the situation differs from the expected, then her statement is basically, "A 'normal' beauty school wouldn't be adjacent to a soup kitchen, or have disabled clients, or 'old Russian women' [which, I notice this comic went with the babushka AND the orthopedic stockings, so, no stereotyping there!] The "And disabled people" is clearly intended as a throwaway, jokey mention, which, ugh. And maybe I'm too critical, but this doesn't seem like an endorsement at all; it's reading, to me, as, "Look at the stuff I ENDURED, you guys!"
I'm not normally a multiple-replies-to-a-thread commenter, but this comic really left a bad taste.

@SarahDances I think it's more treating "disabled people" as a) one entity, and b) a distinct other. There were disabled people there! But there aren't disabled people everywhere? It seems like a strange thing to single out as a funny element of a poorer environment.

@Kitten Mittens, @klibberfish et al.–I see where you're coming from, I do (I am also not normally this invested in commenting). it's hard to definitively say where the line is between mockery/othering & actively stating the facts. but I guess my POV is coming from, isn't it a given that most pedicure establishments are not adjacent to a soup kitchen? that they don't usually cater to the same clientele? & that therefore, a situation that juxtaposes these two things is unusual/potentially noteworthy? I know "normal" is a loaded term, but I think there is an argument that we have a cultural standard for "normal pedicure salon," & that this was not it.

it's gotten so overexplained & analyzed that I can't really think about it anymore. but I think the offense comes from inferring that the author/artist is showing bias, vs. (in my reading), responding to the contrast between the social expectation of "place to get a pedicure" & the reality when she was there.

…I don't know. maybe I'm just trying to justify my NOT getting offended. I definitely think those who were are entitled to their opinion; hopefully this (excessive) elaboration can make clear, though, that those who enjoyed the comic aren't necessarily endorsing marginalization or insensitivity. I just thought it was an interesting story about a place that apparently exists.

@Kitten Mittens Esther told the story in the second comic on the most recent podcast and I laughed out loud to myself at the bus stop when she began to explain the situation. It's pretty much word for word what the comic says, but in her tone you don't even doubt that it's purely an observation and not meant to be taken offensively. I suppose it just might not have translated to comic/print well?

@tesladrianne: Well, that is heartening news. As I said, I've really liked Esther's other comics (which was maybe why this one seemed so out-of-character)? Goodness knows I've had the ol' tone-translation issue quite a few times myself.

I'm really interested in what @Esther has to say about all this, obviously. Maybe we can discuss it over soup?

@Kitten Mittens
I'm old, poor, disabled and Russian and I say you bitches need to can it!
(and i call you bitches cuz I'm ghetto. teehee)

@Kitten Mittens All of this. Not to mention "also some disabled people." Always fun when you're reading a story and the author feels that people like you are so completely WEIRD that your very existence anywhere near her needs to be pointed out.

@Kitten Mittens I don't know, it's this kind of PC backlash that will probably lead a talent like Esther to bite her tongue; shrink away somewhat. What a shame. Youve misunderstood her completely.

@Kelley Dude, never do keyword research. I had to do some last week for "hair colour" and pubic hair came up way too many times (this means I knew exactly how many people were searching for it).

@Megan Patterson@facebook – On the flip side of that, I googled "daisy chain" (with safesearch off, even) the other day and was pleasantly surprised that pretty much all the image search results were garlands of flowers.

@Kelley
Oh Christ you're not making that up…

@Helen Stanley When I use "ugh" it means "yuck" or "ew". I've never seen someone use it in place of "uh", but that's what it seems like in this context.

That reminds me of how my brother and I were confused by my Indiana cousin's accent (I'm from New Jersey). We were playing with a Spirograph (remember those?!), and she said, "Ewww, that's pretty!" It sounded like an oxymoron to our ears, but what she really meant was, "Oooh, that's pretty!" It didn't keep us from teasing them about it, though. We thought that because most of the people on TV talked like us, we were right and they were wrong. It was pretty jerky of us in hindsight, but you know…kids.

@tesladrianne go on!

@Esther C. Werdiger Weeeell, okay. Basically we'd sit around the table after the soup bowls had been stashed in the sink, and there would be anywhere from 8 to 12 of us around a fairly small table, so we'd be smushed in shoulder to shoulder. There's a light-up bouncy ball, about half the size of my fist, that the first player tosses into the playing field. Everyone has their hands behind their neck or on their shoulders, poised and ready to use their 'stumps' (elbows) to hit the ball around. It's really ridiculous, actually, especially as an outside observer new to the sport, (as I originally was) because you hear 'THUMP THUMP THUMP HAAAAAHAHAHAHA' and walk into flailing elbows and a bunch of adults sitting around a table at one o'clock on a Sunday laughing hysterically. The ridiculousness was most likely the appeal. There was no aim, except you get a demerit if you hit the ball so hard it flies off the table, or if you miss the ball and you have to get up and retrieve it.

It's harder than you might think, and everyone always walked away with bruised elbows (from hitting the side of the table or each other) and I think we might have had a couple black eyes.

@tesladrianne how's that for PC? (I'm sulking in shame over here, in case you were wondering)

@tesladrianne Wondering how I can respond without getting into trouble, again.