97
The League of Ordinary Ladies: Dates and Ice Cream
Previously: Soup and Pedicures.
Esther C. Werdiger has a weekly podcast and a rich internet life, but also a job in Jerusalem.
Your mom pretty much destroyed me at words with friends.
@Nutellaface I managed to squeak in a win the first game we played. Her response? "Not unbeatable."
Feisty. She clearly shook my confidence.
I pretty much love every line in "League of Ordinary Ladies," but "And now I have someone to slap when I'm drunk at parties" just took the cake. So great!
@SarahP: "I have always loved bed" is basically my life in 5 words.
@Bittersweet I'm glad I'm not the only one who has more trouble getting up in the winter. I'm all, why can't humans hibernaaaaaaate???
@SarahP That one is actually me. I realized in my last year of highschool that at some point, I had switched from daydreaming about boys in class to daydreaming about bed. I would be sitting in Anatomy and Physiology staring out the window and imagining that I was lying under my comforter and my other comforter and my blanket and my quilt with my nose just a little bit cold, watching the tree outside my window and looking for faces in the branches… sigh.
Pandora Diamond. CRYING.
@likethestore …?
@Pandora Diamond Well played.
@Pandora Diamond I totally misread the comic and thought the spy's name was Aspy. Which would be a fantastic name for a fully realized dream-spy as well, right?
Author (I was going to say Esther, but, I dunno, that's kinda weird), do you sell prints? Or like originals or something awesome? Because these are eternally great and I would like to financially support the making of more of them
@wilarseny Or if she turned the comics into a book! I would totally buy it!
@likethestore yesssss i would put it on my coffee table, if my coffee table ever had enough space for a book
@wilarseny The League of Ordinary Ladies would make lovely wallpaper as well. Basically I need Esther's drawings and words all around me at all times
@hearththr remember the duvet cover with words on it, from the video with the string in the apartment, from.. last week? two weeks ago? THAT.
@wilarseny remember that one thing, from that one time?
@wilarseny email me?
I guess I just think 52 calories is not enough calories for my ice cream. I like my ice cream to have allll the calories. See: mcflurries, blizzards, ben & jerry's new york chunky monkey (I'm pretty sure that one is like 375 calories for half of the pint P:)
@redheadedandcrazy Ben & Jerry's S'mores is ruining my life.
@redheadedandcrazy: Right. I don't trust that colorie count and don't support fraud, so full-calorie frozen custard is for me!
Never stop, Esther. Never stop.
@kayjay: Faster, faster.
@Hot mayonnaise Additionally, I would like it harder, if it's not too much trouble.
That whole date part is the story of my effing life.
Huge LOL at "And I was like just untag him/I know," because I just realized that's what 99% of my conversations would sound like if you only looked at one frame.
"And I was like, just untag him."
@Nate Jones@twitter "I knooow."
Melbourne REPRESENT.
@steve – I live in S/E Melbourne – Respect.
Uhhhh Mediafire link please?!
@rambutan http://www.mediafire.com/?mu00jkymj1e
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@Esther C. Werdiger embarrassed
@Esther C. Werdiger !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@Esther C. Werdiger That was delightful!
@rambutan so obviously this post was just trickery. we have all learned how interesting you are!
love it.
@Esther C. Werdiger <3 times infinity
@Jane Marie JANEEEEEEEE
@Esther C. Werdiger IT IS SO GOOOODDDDD
@Esther C. Werdiger loved it! so charming! are there other songs where you breathily harmonize with yourself? seriously, i want to hear those songs.
@candybeans I'll release them as singles with relevant comics.
@Esther C. Werdiger I just cooked dinner while listening to your song! Love it. In the back of every "League of Ordinary Ladies" comic book, can you put a CD of original songs? Kthanks.
Oooh… "I have always loved bed". Sigh, me too.
@QuiteAimable I know, right? I just put on my winter duvet too, and a new puffy mattress pad (on top of my natural-memory-foam mattress topper) AND I did that silk pillowcase thing. HEAVEN.
I should go there now.
@QuiteAimable getting out of bed in the winter is ACTUALLY the hardest thing. I already press snooze for an hour, what am I going to do now that getting out of bed involves moving from warm snuggliness to cold terribleness?
@punkahontas Your bed sounds fancy! I just add three blankets to my bed in the wintertime.
@redheadedandcrazy Ugh, I know! I have an electric blanket on my bed so that makes it doubly hard to get out of it, especially since I keep the heat down so low in my house I can almost see my breath.
@QuiteAimable I put my second duvet on my bed a few weeks ago and it is the best. It is like sleeping in a nest!
"And now I have someone to slap when I'm drunk at parties."
THIS.
ESTHERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I agree with everyone, NEVER STOP but also STOP RIGHT NOW because sometimes I feel like I can't take it!!! The hilarity overwhelms and paralyzes me. (although apparently I can still type)
My favorite part this time = The airplane with a giant rose superimposed… and the telephone… total romance gone awry
This makes my week, and all I can do is sit here smugly that Esther and I grew up together and bla bla bla. And special guest appearance from Jude! My whole office is wondering why I am cackling right now.
You guys are right. NEVER STOP. And please financially support Esther, she is available for freelance graphic design work and as a customer can I just say she is AHMAZING.
Dear Esther,
Thanks!
Love, all women (for real, always and forever)
This is my new favorite thing on the Hairpin.
Never stop.
For one panel there I thought Pandora Diamond had Asperger's.
The most P.C. comic yet! I am disturbed by not one thing in this weeks edition, good for you E-town!
(that's you, Esther)
PS: your podcast has inspired me to start my own (hooray!) but I cannot think of a name worthy enough and band-name generator websites so far have been mightily disappointing. Binary Onions? Barcode Of The Alpine Onslaught? Song Of The Thirsty Garlic? no! No! NO! Please tell me the story of how the name Sounds Ace came to be and perhaps something will spark.
IF A DUDE LIKES YOU HE WILL NOT NECESSARILY DO OR SAY ANYTHING THOUGH
At least in my experience as a dude who has liked several friend-ladies about which he did and said nothing because, SHYNESS/ANXIETY.
[cue "the more you know" graphic/music]
@jfruh WHY? STOP IT. Tell all your dudely friends to stop it, too. Thank you.
@Alice Prin But why won't the LADIES speak up? We are all equal, etc.!
(Also I have been married for like six years now so this is NO LONGER MY PROBLEM, thank the gods. Though we didn't have our first kiss until our seventh date, so you can see what I was working with.)
YEAH STOP IT
@jfruh: http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/my-superpower-is-being-alone-forever
Paragraph 1
@jfruh Because you know what happens when a lady speaks up? It always ends in rejection! It is super hard to navigate the dude thing of seeming super detached and aloof.
And even if Dude IS interested, he'll lose interest because Lady isn't mysterious anymore.
And I don't know if you've noticed? But Pinners are an ornery bunch. Seriously, we're one punchy group of skirt. Sitting around waiting for the perfect Questionably Tattooed Manchild doesn't cut any ice after 22-ish.
@jfruh Punchy group of skirt!! I die.
@jfruh Word. It took several semi-dates ("hey, I'm in your area this afternoon, wanna hang out?") and physically sharing a sleeping space on two entirely separate occasions for my dude to finally make a move. And his "move" basically consisted of talking while I was trying to go to sleep until I decided the only way to shut him up was to start kissing. So, uh, yeah. Romance!
I just watched a Marcel the Shell video (oh god he creeps me out so bad) and I couldn't help but read all of these in his voice.
@KeLynn I thought it was just me that found marcel the shell creepy, since everyone was like, "oh, watch this adorable thing! he has sneakers or some shit!" and i just skeeve-shivered the whole way through.
anyhow. this post was great. carry on.
@candybeans RIGHT?! I cannot put my finger on why it is so unsettling, but "skeeve-shivered" is exactly how I feel too. It makes me feel the way Salad Fingers does, although I will concede that Salad Fingers is MUCH worse.
@KeLynn uh oh. I don't know what Salad Fingers is, and now you're making me google it. It does not sound good.
@KeLynn: He? Marcel is voiced by Jenny Slate of Saturday Night Live.
@Too Much Internet lulz yeah, but Marcel the character himself is def. meant to be a dude.
………..I think. I mean, he's a shell.
"3:22 am
Some Cupcake Blog???"
YES.
It must be remarked that when that when our rightly acclaimed countryman W. Somerset Maugham asserted “At a dinner party one should eat wisely but not too well, and talk well but not too wisely”, had he the astuteness and dispositions of our beloved Esther, he would have decreed that one should always aspire to be slapped by a hand as fair as those of my Hairpin compeers.
Dear Esther: Stop being inside my head!!!!!
(this re the first comic)
GCHAT.
sometimes though after you realize that your crush on your friend boy will not end up with you two dating but you stay friends and hang out a lot he will get drunk and try to make out with you then propose to his girlfriend the next day.
@mooseketeer Now you have someone to slap when you're drunk at parties!
Side Note: Dude that you are already friends with that like you will totally not say or do anything.
@Onymous – Yeah, as a dude who has been this dude a semi-unreasonable amount of times, it is totally true. However, there is another easy way to tell:
Have you ever asked a dude friend: "Why are you being weird?" If it was just one time, and he was completely sober, or more than three times when he was drunk, he likes you. LIKE LIKES YOU.
This always goes up between my afternoon break and when I leave work and I always stay after everyone so I can read it twice because it is always so lovely. Also I did a bittersweet LOL when Jude called you a bitch because I wish it was summer again. Ugh go away winter : (
Esther, I feel like we could date.
Gchat me so I can let you down easy.
jk. send pics.
Is it weird that I like the way the characters are dressed? Like…oh I should get a stripey tee shirt like that. Ohhh, turtlenecks and huge sunglasses! Is that a cardigan? I want more cardigans!
The League of Ordinary Ladies are my favorite Hairpin posts, but this one was by far my favorite of all of them. "Off to yoga!" slayed me dead.
what brilliant, funny comics
thanks for making them!
Eeeee! The friend crush thing= priceless!
I totally did that first comic thing! Except over facebook chat (the worst) and I didn't already have a crush on him, but I could have fallen for him pretty hard. He said no, and he's right, we would have been a terrible couple. And now we are really good friends and I think about it when I need to remember that I am a competent, brave human being.
Friendcrush and winter comforter are killing me right now, have been all month. Nice.
Amazingness!
The first one is me. Except maybe I ended up going on a date with this guy but now I'm not sure if he actually likes me and UGH I really hate dating because it's confusing.
What if you are REALLY AWKWARD on gchat?!
I'm talking like, multiple "hahahahahas" per min because I get nervous when the guy doesn't respond. essentially the text equivalent of puking on him in real life. What then??????????
SOME. CUPCAKE. BLOG.
Dying. I love these/Esther!
People please. Do not attempt to elongate a word by only repeating the last letter. If you actually said "sometimes I feel like we could dateeeee" he probably said no because of your tendency to make high pitched squeals.
@Ham Snadwich thats probably how she wrote it in gchat; never was said
I love these SO HARD. "And now I have someone to slap when I am drink at parties." I DIE.
PANDORA DIAMOND!!
"I go on dates but sort of just find most people NICE."
Totally my experience with online dating so far!
@steve – I live in S/E Melbourne – Respect.
I was a lot less happy before I read these. Thank you.