Quantcast

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

71

We Need to Talk About Bones Again

Brief recap.

Okay, here's the thing. We have a lot of forensic anthropology in the culture now. Maybe you don't watch Bones. Maybe you read those adorable Gideon Oliver mysteries by Aaron Elkins. Regardless, every single iteration of the genre has at least one episode where everyone's looking at the skull, and someone says, wait, I'm not sure that's a bullet hole, and it's. always. trepanning. It's like there's a trepanning epidemic in the United States. We should honestly stop selling drill bits, because clearly our nation's murderers are not able to control themselves.

Other thoughts (this is what happens when you watch episodes as they appear on your DVR in no particular order from all possible seasons): Wait, is ZZ Top seriously on the show? Why doesn't Booth kill Ryan O'Neal? He sucks! Why don't these people have normal goddamn names? Temperance! Seeley! Are they having an improbable name-off with Private Practice? (Cooper, Violet, Addison, Sheldon!) Am I the only person still watching Private Practice?

Oh, and if I ever find a body with signs of strangulation, I am handcuffing myself to the corpse until I can ask the CSI team if there's a possibility they were garrotted. Hand to God.



71 Comments / Post A Comment

Sydney C

SPOILER ALERT
Can we also please talk about how Mr. Vincent Nigel-Murray was adorable and hilarious and I totally had the biggest crush on him? And then SPOILER and now he is on that horrible SyFy show? Boo!!!

annepersand

@Sydney C I KNOOOOOW but how good was that Fever Ray montage! Best montage ever.

nogreeneggs

@Sydney C Mr. Nigel-Murray was my favorite! I loved how he always spouted random facts and everyone was like "STFU dude, not relevant!" but I was always "no keep giving me random nonsense facts and I love you."

Bittersweet

@Sydney C: YES. If they were going to SPOILER an intern I really wish it had been Daisy, because she was the annoyingest and Sweets totally deserves better.

Sydney C

@Bittersweet Agreed on all counts, but I don't know if I could really handle a grieving Sweets! The thought alone makes me want to weep.

Glee

@Sydney C That's where I know him from! Bless you for clearing that up. Every time I watch Alphas I spend the entire episode trying to figure where I've seen him before.

Rebecca Stokes@facebook

now this is happening: http://www.fempop.com/2011/04/04/recap-bones-season-6-episode-16-oh-my-god-they-are-in-an-elevator-together-and-also-horrible-things-will-happen-to-the-fetus/

dinos

Oh thank you. I went to TWOP yesterday to read funny recaps to quell the Bones-withdrawal tremors and they had NOTHING. This one has better writing than most of the show itself.

wharrgarbl

@dinos TWOP stopped doing anything with the show after it went on a brief hiatus after that episode in season one where the entire cast of Northern Exposure was a vet-fucking felon.

dinos

@wharrgarbl I can't wait to call somebody a vet-fucking felon.

lil_bobbytables

Oh man, I love the Gideon Oliver books! I know that is off topic, but so rarely do they come up in conversation. Hurrah!

Nicole Cliffe

Old Bones > Curses! > Make No Bones > Twenty Blue Devils > The Dark Place > all the other ones

Megasus

@lil_bobbytables Murdoch Mysterrrrrieeessss

parallel-lines

I remember reading an article about trepanation in Rolling Stone back in the 90's that scared the living bejesus out of me. No one is doing this! Almost no one! It's about as common as those weird diseases on House!

Ophelia

@parallel-lines When do you think we'll see the NYT trend piece on trepanning?

lil_bobbytables

@parallel-lines I am pretty sure I read that as well, and have been irrationally afraid of drills ever since.

annepersand

@Ophelia Trepan three of your friends in Brooklyn and I can just about guarantee you at least 20 inches in the Thursday Style section.

Ophelia

@annepersand I mean, I DO own a cordless drill. And have a well-stocked bar. Hmmm.

Pound of Salt

@parallel-lines It must be sarcoidosis.

Ophelia

@Pound of Salt or amyloidosis.

Nicole Cliffe

BUT COULD IT BE LUPUS?

parallel-lines

@Nicole Cliffe No...maybe some bad shellfish*?

* a diagnosis that will never happen on this show.

parallel-lines

@lil_bobbytables oh no, I found it--the photos alone !

http://books.google.com/books?id=NhMpG7hKAr0C&pg=PA118&lpg=PA118&dq=spin+trepanation&source=bl&ots=Vg1umBDIVt&sig=ZZrtw5NCSKO60dZKE35za2TgBHI&hl=en&ei=4p9nTqqfJIrV0QHL5vTmCw&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=3&ved=0CCsQ6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=spin%20trepanation&f=false

Sydney C

@parallel-lines I love when they run out of obscure diseases to diagnose and then they realize it was just cancer. JUST CANCER.

"Guys, it was just cancer!"
"Thank God!"- Everyone on House and no one in real life

teaandcakeordeath

Manchausen Syndrome seems to be the medical drama equivalent of trepanning.

annepersand

@teaandcakeordeath Or the even rarer Munchausen's by proxy. I eagerly await the inevitable "YOU TREPANNED YOUR OWN DAUGHTER FOR ATTENTION" House episode.

teaandcakeordeath

@annepersand
Ha! I can picture it now: 'Oh my god, its not diabetes - there are HOLES in her SKULL!'

Nicole Cliffe

@teaandcakeordeath If only she had washed her new jeans before wearing them, she wouldn't have had holes drilled in her skull by her mother.

wharrgarbl

@annepersand That L&O:SUV episode where the girl was being molested by a celebrity and also her grandmother was mercury-poisoning her for mumblemumble because wait, what?

SuperMargie

I have yet to watch this show, so am I correct in assuming that the TV series is to the books as "True Blood" is to the Sookie Stackhouse books? I have read all the Bones books by Kathy Reichs.

Megasus

@SuperMargie True Blood is actually better than the Sookie Stackhouse novels. By like, a LOT.

Hiroine Protagonist

@SuperMargie That is actually a pretty good comparison. Less rape though.

SuperMargie

@Megan Patterson@facebook I totally agree with that True Blood sentiment. I just hate going into a series I think I know and then being all *WTF?*.

wharrgarbl

@SuperMargie Are they worth it, or is it like Dexter, where kind of liking the show isn't going to get you through the one about demons from space that are also gods?

MoonBat

@SuperMargie
Oh the Bones books are so good...I can eat like three in a sitting. And I pronounce her name "TEM-PRAAHHHNCE" in my head, all Southern drawl.

Hiroine Protagonist

@MoonBat Ha! I pronounce them like LaManche does, "Tem-pah-raaance". I may or may not be re-reading Death du Jour for the fortieth time.

barnhouse

Philip Pullman is so great in the trepanning in His Dark Materials. It's good for you!!

Slutface

Trepanning is the new planking.

E
E

I'm still watching Private Practice! I have an insatiable need to vicariously enjoy personal drama, complicated by the fact that all my friends are relatively sane healthy adults in stable relationships. SO! I read advice columns and watch Grey's/Private practice, and all summer long when those shows are in hiatus, I grab people by the collar and say, "DO YOU HAVE ANY GOOD GOSSIP FOR ME!?" and I put on project runway and say, "That's right! Weep in the bathroom! Call her a bitch, oh yes...yes, it feels so good in my veins now."

Ophelia

@E Two words for you: Rookie Blue. Canadian cop drama that just last week jumped the shark with a pretty excellent hookup.

nogreeneggs

Related/unrelated:

Wendell the intern in Bones was in an episode of Veronica Mars. The one where the girl lost her boyfriend and Vmars tried to Occam's razor the girl into thinking her boyfriend was cheating on her. But he wasn't. Veronica just didn't believe in love anymore.

apples and oranges

@nogreeneggs sigh.. I miss this show

beams!

I took an forensic anthro class and my final got a skull with a hole that wasn't from a bullet or trepanning! It was from a shunt! To drain cerebral spinal fluid! My guess was trepanning though. I think a shunt epidemic would be more believable than trepanning one. Someone needs to let the writers know.

wharrgarbl

My favorite/most-rage-inducing episode of Bones was the one where some writer (The show has like two dozen of them. It is written by the Duggars.) was Making A Point and the B-plot was how the only reason Brennan's murder-porn books sell is because of Angela's contributions and people's love of the chaaaaaaaaaaracters. Which, sorry, no, people watch Bones because the actors are cute and they reliably feature somebody getting trepanned to death with a rabid porcupine dipped in curare poison on account of one too many expired coupons. If they watched it for the characters, they'd have put a brick through the tv the third time Camille oscillated between being a people-person and a high-functioning-autistic-person within two episodes.

Hiroine Protagonist

@wharrgarbl That could be true about Kathy Reich's books. Damned unresolved sexual tension!

wharrgarbl

@Hiroine Protagonist It looks like she kind of makes a point about being super-accurate about the forensics, though, which I think would make the episode writer's chaaaaaaaaracters hissy kind of a dick-wave at the author. Maybe she took his parking space one too many times?

Hiroine Protagonist

@wharrgarbl Now that you mention it, it is interesting that she participates in something so ridiculously un, uh, science-y. Angela is like some kind of Magical Research Associate. I love a couple of her afterwords which are so finger-shakingly awesome at things like people who are not board certified in forensics testifying in court on forensics. I just roll my eyes and think of it as a metaphor for what must have been weeks or months of work. Like Genesis.

Hiroine Protagonist

@Hiroine Protagonist Wow, that was incoherent. I meant, when they make things that would take weeks and months in life - test results coming back, computer program construction etc - collapse to fit the show's timeline. Yeesh.

Stella Potato

These posts and comments make me so happy! I started working from home about a year ago and quickly ran through all the possible show combinations that are on sydication all the time until I got to Bones. It's a terrible show, with terrible writing, but if I make it to the 30 minute mark, I HAVE to know what happened.
It also drives me out of my mind that they show the repeats with no apparent order whatsoever. That's what I concentrate on when I think that it's actually the acting that's driving me nuts.
(Sorry, I know DB is grandfathered into amazingness because of his Buffy connection, but his "I'm just a dumb old FBI agent soldier man who loves love!" schtick is the worst. The worst!

wharrgarbl

@Stella Potato Refusing to wear a regulation tie is only going to get you so far. They should upgrade his schtick to refusing to wear a shirt.

Ophelia

@wharrgarbl and/or pants.

Stella Potato

@Ophelia @wharrgarbl Am I treading too much into Law and Order: SVU territory if I suggest some tape over his mouth too?

wharrgarbl

@Stella Potato Probably not? I mean, far be it from me to suggest that Det. Stabler shouldn't be dispatched to handle the case, but not be able to close it without Benson, who wouldn't be dispatched because yeah, that tape should probably stay on.

Stella Potato

@wharrgarbl I would love to see a crossover show with all these characters. You know Stabler would get all rage-y on Booth. I'm sure some beautiful fan fic could come from that, if it doesnt already exist.

Ophelia

@Stella Potato ...and now we know what to do with the rest of the afternoon...

PistolPackinMama

Oh Lord Yeezus. I just had to quit bones because Dr. Brennan is such an insufferable snot-face.

Seriously. I have a few of the earlier seasons on DVD and I want to bestow them on someone who will enjoy them more than I will.

Most importantly, I don't care how special she is, telling people she is objectively smarter than they are because SCIENCE!!!!!!

And also, I know everyone always discusses Improbably Forensics on shows like this. But no matter how improbable the SCIENCE!!!!K:AJSHHSDFHG is, the Social Science is a hundred bajillion times less probable, and often is terribly ethnocentric.

Temperance Brennan is a terrible cultural anthropologist, and so if she ever says anything about her cultural thesis blah blah, she is actually probably just using scholarship to justify or rationalize or whatever her own issues.

It (clearly) makes me bats.

Lastly, I think Seely would probably be a pretty good cultural anthropologist.

PistolPackinMama

Ergh. My irritation makes me unable to type: "...objectively smarter jadda jadda, is just not okay, and also wrong."

Susan Cassell@facebook

Hodgins and later Wendell are the clear reasons to watch the show.

Donovan Gentry@twitter

I have never watched an episode of Bones on purpose, but somehow it is on, all the time, everywhere. One time at the gym, an episode ended on one tv and another episode started on another, in case I needed more bones. Also, I like to tell myself the show is called bones because Emily Deschanel looks like Skeletor to me.

Michaela

I spent the longest time thinking I liked this show when actually I totally hate it. I was only watching for parts where people are mean to the main characters. Seriously, my sister/roommate won't watch it with me because any scene where Bones has more than 2 lines I end up screeching "SMUG BITCH" and throwing things.

femme cassidy

I love Bones SO MUCH. Except when I hate it, which is sometimes! Because of Angela the Magical Computer Brain, and Brennan's weird hatred of fat people, and also the Parade of Interchangeable Zachs. (I still call them all Zachs. Black Zach, Girl Zach, Emo Zach, British Zach, Muslim Zach, and Wendell. Wendell doesn't really have a useful summarizing adjective.) But mostly I love it, and am super super excited for the new season.

wharrgarbl

@femme cassidy Blond Zach? Poor Zach? (Seriously, can they go more than one episode with him in it without mentioning how broke he and his mom and all his neighbors and presumably also his dog all are?)

jimmyrapper

After a request, an employer can deny the use of comp time if it will “unduly disrupt the operations,” and an employer is only required to permit use of comp time “within a reasonable period” after a request. This same language in the public sector comp time law has been interpreted as permitting employers to deny workers’ requests for specific days off. That’s a big problem since specific life events—doctor’s appointments, school conferences, moving—usually happen on specific days. landscaping huntington wv

jimmyrapper

am really enjoying reading your experienced writing about the employers. It looks like you spend a lot of effort and time on your blog. The language of the bill itself makes clear that it leaves a huge amount of discretion to the employer is right. Thanks HP 564 printer ink

jimmyrapper

In summary, the choice of algorithms to be included is excellent, and the quality of the submissions is also very good–save the two exceptions I mentioned. Overall, the book is a worthwhile read. does garcinia cambogia extract work

jimmyrapper

@maybe partying will help Laure Ingalls Wilder's wedding was my dream as a kid (and, you know, now). She was so boss. chem dry crawley

jimmyrapper

ery likely likely to bookmark your blog . You actually have excellent articles and reviews. Thanks for sharing your website. what does bubblegum casting do

mans

There are many resources on the internet if you’re looking to make your own and tastes vary is bubblegum casting legitimate

jimmyrapper

Wendell the intern in Bones was in an episode of Veronica Mars. The one where the girl lost her boyfriend and Vmars tried to Occam's razor the girl into thinking her boyfriend was cheating on her. But he wasn't. Veronica just didn't believe in love anymore. mobile web development

jimmyrapper

diagnosis that will never happen on this show. buy cheap instagram likes

Post a Comment

You must be logged-in to post a comment.

Login To Your Account