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We Need to Talk About Bones Again

Brief recap.

Okay, here’s the thing. We have a lot of forensic anthropology in the culture now. Maybe you don’t watch Bones. Maybe you read those adorable Gideon Oliver mysteries by Aaron Elkins. Regardless, every single iteration of the genre has at least one episode where everyone’s looking at the skull, and someone says, wait, I’m not sure that’s a bullet hole, and it’s. always. trepanning. It’s like there’s a trepanning epidemic in the United States. We should honestly stop selling drill bits, because clearly our nation’s murderers are not able to control themselves.

Other thoughts (this is what happens when you watch episodes as they appear on your DVR in no particular order from all possible seasons): Wait, is ZZ Top seriously on the show? Why doesn’t Booth kill Ryan O’Neal? He sucks! Why don’t these people have normal goddamn names? Temperance! Seeley! Are they having an improbable name-off with Private Practice? (Cooper, Violet, Addison, Sheldon!) Am I the only person still watching Private Practice?

Oh, and if I ever find a body with signs of strangulation, I am handcuffing myself to the corpse until I can ask the CSI team if there’s a possibility they were garrotted. Hand to God.

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