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Monday, September 19, 2011

22

The Pros and Cons of Stalking

In a July 1968 edition of the recurring romance-comic feature "Sweet Mystery of Love," the lovely Janice is set up with Freddy the unsmiling, single-minded creep. But is he really so creepy after all? Vintage comic book hoarder Sequential Crush abridges this strange and passionate story of love.

22 Comments / Post A Comment

theharpoon

I can't wait to say to someone, "Oh, you finky creep."

DMcK

@theharpoon That's funny, I can't wait for someone to call me a finky creep. MUST BE TRUE LUV!

DickensianCat

"Oh, you finky Creep!" I'm going to start calling people finks.

theharpoon

@DickensianCat JINX

julia

@DickensianCat Yes! I forgot about the word "fink" and all its insult possibilities.

Anne

I've said it before & I'll say it again.

The only difference between flattery and creepiness is the level of attraction you have for the perp.

wharrgarbl

@Anne I'm pretty sure the most handsomest dude on the planet's still gonna be creepy when he's all "Why won't you go out with me don't tell me you're busy I can see that you're just eating frozen fist sticks right out of the bag and watching reruns of Friends. Also, that time you told me you were washing your hair? The level in your shampoo bottle didn't go down at all. So, I'll pick you up at seven." Even if he brings you a bouquet of blue roses when he picks you up at seven.

atipofthehat

But isn't that Agent 99?

Bebe

Stalking aside, I totally want Janice's groovy hairstyle and collection of dangly earrings.

Patrick M

"Message received!" - every male reader of this site

atipofthehat

@Patrick M

I don't know, I think the guy dies in the end and it's too late for her. Encourage your stalkers early! Try playing them this Jerry Lee Lewis song:

Well, if you hear somebody knockin' on your door
If you see something crawlin' across the floor
Baby, it'll be me, and I'll be lookin' for you

If you see a head a-peepin' from a crawdad hole
If you see somebody climbin' up a telephone pole
Baby, it'll be me, and I'll be lookin' for you

...

Well, if you feel somethin' heavy on your fishing hook
If you see a funny face in your comic book
Baby, it'll be me, and I'll be lookin' for you

...

If you see a new face on a totem pole
If you find a lump in your sugar bowl
Baby, it'll be me, and I'll be lookin' for you....

Speaking of cake, I have cake

@atipofthehat The 'lump in the sugar bowl' is calling up many disturbing images...

melis

A LUMP IN YOUR SUGAR BOWL
A CRAWDAD HOLE

I am going back to bed. This day is over.

atipofthehat

@skyandgorse

Exaaaaaaaactly.

Ham Snadwich

@atipofthehat Well I mean come on, Jerry Lee Lewis.

George K.

in the end he says "I don't love you anymore"

jenergy

@George K. I kind of expected him to be in the hospital with amnesia from a head injury and be all like, "Who the hell are you? Get off me, you finky creep!"

Ham Snadwich

@George K. It's also kind of weird how every time he leaves the house she's making out with a different dude on his lawn.

atipofthehat

The artist simply flips the cover to make page 1. Why draw it twice?

knucklefish

Freddy tries to redeem himself at the end. "Maybe that's because I chased you too hard." MAY-be, Freddy. MAY-be.

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