Friday, September 2, 2011


Spider Terrorizes News Team

I don't even have to do anything! It's nice to feel powerful, but it can also be isolating.


44 Comments / Post A Comment


posted "By A Spider"


@Lucia Martinez No offense, but I think A Spider might be my favorite hairpin contributor.


@Ophelia none taken. I want more A Spider posts. I am A Spider fan.


@Lucia Martinez I think A Spider is actually a tarantula...


@Lucia Martinez Phew.

Jolly Farton

@scully ........................

julie lauren

hahahahaha this is so amazing


Sounds like Michael Scott. But once they showed the spider on the guy's arm I just had to stop because bleargh. Sorry, A Spider.


I am possibly more hungover at work than I've ever been, and this has just cured me. I love how the woman bends in front of the camera so she can read the teleprompter.

A Spider

@bloomer Right?

julie lauren

god the voice cracking PRIMAL TERROR

julie lauren

"just put it back in there" has me wetting my pants. i'm the worst person on earth.


@julie lauren I am STILL laughing. Love this so, so much.


It's not a phobia! It's completely rational fear!


Dear A Spider,
Thank you for posting this today - it's so timely. There is a HUGE spider on (the outside of) my window, and I was wondering if it is you?

Tammy Pajamas

It's good to see you again, A Spider.


Reminds me of a tweet (trying/failing to remember whose it was) that was something along the lines of "pretty people often say that other people are too intimidated to talk to them...I wonder if that's how big spiders feel." Pretty sure this means the world needs a pretty people + spider support group.


@dearheart : It was on one of the "A Softer World" posts! This one.


@MoonBat Oh, bless! You just saved me from throwing the keyboard across the room in frustration at not being able to find the 'tweet' (oh, brain. nice try).

fondue with cheddar

@MoonBat I LOVE A Softer World so very much.

Lady Pennyface

A Spider! I have missed you! Will you be taking over for Nicole when she leaves? (SNIFFLE!) Also did you get offended when weatherdude said you shoot "hair?"

A Spider

@Lady Pennyface Nah it's all good.

Lady Pennyface

@A Spider Taking the high road. Respect.




Do you use a special keyboard, A Spider? Or do you dictate?


@itsasatchel : Touch screen, duh! *shuddering*

A Spider

@itsasatchel Normal keyboard, but it takes me forrreevverr sometimes. This comment alone took me 33 minutes.


Wow, A Spider. I like how you made them lose almost all professionalism and just fall apart on camera. That was awesome! Keep up the good work.


I feel like that newscast told me more about what it means to be a person in a community than any other newscast ever.

A spider on every news team?


i looovvvvve how quickly things spiraled out of control here...virtually no attempt for anyone to hold it together, and 30 more seconds and there would have been just flat out shrieking.


Aww, how could they be scared of something so fuzzy and relatively non-venomous? Don't feel alone, A Spider! My mom wrote a really cute children's book about your jumping cousin, so there's lots of love for you in our family! Also for giant Madagascar hissing cockroaches, which aren't pests but make lovely pets.


"That thing is freaking huge."

That's what A Lady Spider said.


Weathermen are pussies.

Beck Rea@facebook


And also, it's actually really douchey to torment people with their fears. Seriously, it's not going to help someone with a phobia "get over it"--therapy might, but not a situation like this.

I feel for the weatherman.


I am pissed the only roommate home who I tried to show this to has severe arachnophobia and could not watch once spiders were visible.


I love you so much, a spider. One of your pals is hanging out on the wall by my desk!


I'm not sure which creeps me out more: the spider, or the news team's ability to switch so rapidly from Terrified Normal Person Voice to Generic News Person Voice.


this seems more about how ray is a dick than how a spider is powerful


I've been waiting for you A Spider! The other week one of your tiny cousins flew through the air and onto the inside of my glasses lens and I, a graduate of The Hairpin's Love A Spider® program, completely did not freak out.

fondue with cheddar

@thatsrealbutter OMG HOW DID YOU DO IT? I am impressed. My fear of spiders is mild (and appropriate, I think), and I would have completely freaked out.


That's a terribly irresponsible way to handle a tarantula of that size. If she had panicked and jumped and hit a hard surface, she could easily have broken her abdomen and quickly bled to death.

Xa Hoi@facebook

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