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Thursday, June 23, 2011

48

Who Stole This Man's Pregnant Barbie?

Criminals are on the loose in Gurnee, Illinois:

A Barbie doll purported to be rare because of features that include a detachable pregnant belly and a tiny doll fetus has been reported stolen from a Gurnee apartment.

The 67-year-old man who owned the doll reported to police on June 18 that it had gone missing from inside his apartment ... The man didn’t know how long it had been missing.

He told police the blond figure, with its bulging belly, was a rare find, and set its value at $400.

A quick search, however, reveals that the doll, a controversial pregnant Midge produced in 2002, is also available on Amazon for $147. Or even $99. (Also, SIGTGMBMPBOIGTCYFT.)

[Via]

Photo via StraightFromtheA

48 Comments / Post A Comment

rhoswhen

I always wanted the pregnant Barbie doll when I was a kid. My mom wouldn't let me have it. I can see why. *shudder*

raised amongst catalogs

I'm having a hard time grasping why pregnant Midge was controversial. Was there some paternity test that revealed that Ken, not her husband Alan, was the father? Where's my Maury Povich doll when I need it?

DrFeelGood

@vanillawaif Does it have a button that makes the doll say "you are/not the father"?

becky@twitter

@vanillawaif i sure hope it also comes with connie chung and a piano for her to sing on top of (http://youtu.be/AiMvXCp2Qvo).

young preeezy

Ahhh!! One of my sister's friends totally had a pregnant belly barbie! But that was like, 1991. And it was possibly a knockoff-barbie.

Anyway, it was similar to the naked barbie in the picture above - you could pretty much open the stomach and remove the little baby inside. I think her mom gave it to her for some reason (and she must have been like, 10 at the time). Weird. I remember being slightly traumatized after seeing that (I was 6).

applestoapples

@prizzzle My friend had one of those, too--I think it was a Barbie knockoff. We used to pretend that Skipper and Steven (Christie's boyfriend) kidnapped the baby from the hospital and ran away to a tropical paradise.

jacqueline
jacqueline

@prizzzle Are you perhaps thinking of the pregnant french Barbie, also knows as "Maman Surprise"? I had one of those and it RULED.

young preeezy

@jacqueline AHH that might have been the same one! It looks similar.. That dress (which, I must say, is rather cute) looks really familiar.

Also-- lolz at "Maman Surprise."

raised amongst catalogs

Oh my god. Ok. I get it now. I read the Amazon reviews from the many, many customers who refudiate the idea of a pregnant doll. One did not find it "approprite" and then, well...then there's Shelly.

"Ok so now Barbie or Midge is pregnant. But it is ok because she is married to Alan. Well why then is Alan sold seprately? My daughter and I saw this at the toy store tonight. She announced shocked that there was a pregnant Barbie. I looked at the doll and had to laugh I didn't really think that she saw what she thought she saw but sure enough Barbie or Midge really was pregnant. My daughter than asked me if she was single mom Barbie. I told her that until you buy Alan that yes i guess she is single mom Barbie.
My daughter has played with Barbie as she has other dolls. She chooses the dolls by how they look and what they are wearing. She does not know that Midge got married a few years ago to Alan and that they have a son and now she is pregnant with a little girl. That is just to much pretend for her. This doll may not be inapropriate to some but to my daughter it was just to weird for her dolls."

jneslo

@vanillawaif How I read this: I'm too cheap to buy an Alan doll and don't want single motherhood anywhere near my daughters imagination.

DrFeelGood

@vanillawaif ha. Whatevs. my barbies were all dating/married to my Care Bears... Interspecies love! Suck on that Shelly!

theharpoon

@DrFeelGood I used to have interspecies wars between my Barbies, troll dolls, and Legos. I think the trolls usually won because I thought the Barbies were probably too stupid, and the trolls could just step on the Legos.

But my Barbies did get to take long road trips when I would tie a string to their beat-up Barbie convertible and drag it around my block. They would of course make pit stops for Barbie and Ken to do it in the bushes.

rosy disposition

@DrFeelGood My barbie was married to Skeletor! He was muscular and purple, a great match for Barbie (at least in my 6-year old mind)

Alexandra Martell

My best friend and I may or may not have made our own pregnant Barbie when we were kids by strapping a Barbie bike helmet to a Barbie's stomach. Theoretically.

sheepfriend

@aliemartell Hahahahahahahaha. That's brilliant.

Caitlin Podiak

@aliemartell That reminds me of how my sister and I would cut off our Barbies' hair and turn their torsos around to make hunchbacks, because we needed male characters for our stories and weren't allowed to have Ken dolls for some reason.

becky@twitter

@Caitlin Podiak we dyed their hair with koolaid in the sink.

dinos

@Caitlin Podiak My sister and I cut the hair and filed off the boobs of Maxi doll.

sarah girl

@aliemartell I made pregnant Barbies by stuffing clothes under their dresses into a vaguely round shape. I was a weird kid. :(

Katie Walsh

I had pregnant Barbie when I was little, but then my dog ate the baby :(

jackietgregory

@Katie Walsh *dingo

sheepfriend

I can think of a weirder (albeit knockoff) Barbie.

When I was younger I got this set of dolls & horses. The horses were for dolls to ride, obviously. Anyway, someone had the ingenious idea of creating a method of preventing the riders from falling off.. the dolls had holes (strategically placed between their legs, duh) and the saddle had a rod sticking out. Voila, doll don't fall. How my mother kept a straight face when I played with them I'll never know.

DrFeelGood

@sheepfriend Are you strangely attracted to equine role play now?

sheepfriend

@DrFeelGood Hahaha! No, although I am a keen horse rider.. but I was before the dolls, I swear!

rayray

@sheepfriend I had those!!! Creepy when you think about it.

rocknrollunicorn

@sheepfriend This is rather tangential, but due to my screenname, which is also associated with my FB account, I frequently get ads about Equestrian Dating. One was very strange and featured an image of a... centaur, I guess? Basically implying that I might want to fuck horse-men.

rayray

@rocknrollunicorn My best friend from school's older brother used to call me 'horsey porn' because I was into horse riding as a kid and read horse magazines. I saw him for the first time in years recently and he greeted me with the same old name. I'm just glad he doesn't know anyone else I know.

Pound of Salt

Cute hairdos. Not.

becky@twitter

why is the baby spread eagle?

sorry your heinous

@becky@twitter That's how babies are until their hip plates fuse.
--Dr. SYH, MD, Hollywood Upstairs Medical College

sox
sox

@sorry your heinous No kidding, I just had a friend whose baby had to wear a hip brace for like 2 months holding her legs in that position because her hips didn't fuse. The more you know.

becky@twitter

@sorry your heinous i feel like a horrible woman for not knowing that.

britt

Well, well. I live in Gurnee, Il. And I'm not sure how I'll sleep at night knowing a doll thief is afoot!

MKP@twitter

This is my favorite Amazon review thus far:

WHY WOULD ANY LITTLE GIRL WANT TO BECOME A REAL MOTHER! TELL ME! HOW MANY LITTLE GIRLS DO YOU KNOW OF WOULD WANT THAT? IF THEY DID DREAM OF BECOMING MOTHERS - WHICH IS NOT ONLY CUTE, BUT RATHER NURTURING, AND INNOCENT AS WELL - THEY'D BUY PLASTIC TOY BABIES! DUH! I DID! AND NOTHING BAD HAPPENED TO ME. I THINK MIDGE IS A BETTER ROLE MODEL THAN BARBIE ANYDAY. THAT BLONDE SLUT IS NOTHING BUT AN AIRHEAD WHO BECOMES OBSESSED WITH FASHION AND BOYS. LOOK AT MY SCENE! SAME GOES FOR BRATZ. MIDGE IS DECENT, MARRIED MOTHER, WHO WORRIES ABOUT MAINTAINING A FAMILY! BRATZ AND BARBIE HAVE SEDUCED GIRLS INTO WANTING TO BECOME HOOCHIE-MAMAS. FACE THE FACTS, PEOPLE! MIDGE WILL ONLY INSPIRE GIRLS TO DREAM OF BEING DECENT MOTHERS! THERE! MIDGE IS BETTER!

MIDGE IS DECENT. Well, not literally in the picture where she's half naked and torso-skinless.... but in general.

sox
sox

@MKP@twitter This just induced a major fake coughing fit in my cube. THAT BLONDE SLUT. Ahhhh!
But how did anyone know all these stories? I know I grew up in a rural area without cable/satellite and one TV station, but still, was there a cartoon, books, what? How did I never know the storyline?

raised amongst catalogs

@MKP@twitter Midge also has spring break braids in her hair, which leads me to believe she went on adult spring break and cheated on Alan. Don't believe me? Watch the Dolls Gone Wild video that came out before her 2nd baby was born.

Lola

@vanillawaif the argument ending "THERE!" is my fav.

Jolly Farton

@MKP@twitter "AND NOTHING BAD HAPPENED TO ME."

Well, something happened to you.

Kneetoe

Hey saythatscool, I told you to use protection!

Sunny Marie@twitter

Oh man, I remember seeing those commercials on TV as a kid. And even at that tender, impressionable age I was horrified.

Lola

I love babies and children, but pregnancy seems horrible. Isn't it like having a parasite that eats your food and uses your blood and battles its way out of your body in a horrible, violent way? This doll is reinforcing that impression. Barbie is just a hollow, baby-carrying host.

JessicaLovejoy

@Lola Ditto on loving babies, but pregnancy itself seeming like cruel and unusual punishment. They are parasites! Or deluxe teratomas.

rayray

@Lola This is how I feel about pregnancy too, and I'm really not keen on babies or children either. Am I monster? Perhaps.

DrFeelGood

@Lola lol. At the gym the other day I was watching "16 and pregnant" and during the delivery I'm all "GROSS" and then as soon as the baby is out I was all "AWWW... BABIES. MUST HAVE BABIES". Stupid uterus.

winchesterwolcott

@DrFeelGood Well, I'm pregnant right now and it's the worst. I mean, it's great and all, and there's a cute (I hope) baby in there and everything, but it's awful.

Lola

@winchesterwolcott Thank you for that honesty! All my pregnant friends are like, no it's an amazing miracle of life, I love my body and what it can do, etc, etc. There is no way it's a good time.

Also, you will obviously have the cutest baby ever. All Hairpinners have awesome babies.

bashe

Where is the militant natalist outcry against the pretty obvious issue that Barbie-Midge whatever is going to have to have a C-section, hmmmm? I don't think there's an anatomically correct panty hamster on those ladies. Unless Barbie-Midge was riding one of sheepfriend's horses, of course.

cosmia

Like everyone else, I'm totally confused as to why this particular doll is especially "controversial" when compared to the other equally terrifying pregnant Barbies my friends had in the early 90s. I never had one, because they kind of fascinated me but were mostly disturbing. WHEN YOU TAKE OUT THE FETUS THERE IS LITERALLY JUST A GAPING HOLE IN BARBIE'S TORSO.

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