Thursday, June 2, 2011



Like sands through the hourglass . . . so are the days of our Relationshapes. Slip into your loosest bra, pour yourself a glass of prosecco, run your fingers through your hair, and enjoy!

Actually, we only have three weeks left so we’d better get right to it:

Thanks to reader Nora R. for drawing these amazing shapes! Send your best shapes to shapes@artisanalpencilsharpening.com; maybe they’ll be featured in a future installment!
Reader Simon dV. found this shape in the wild and immediately snapped a picture!
After a week of silence, the ol’ answering machine at Relationshapes HQ is blinking and flashing once again. Let’s listen to a random message:

“Hello? Hello? Oh, I guess that was the beep and I should leave a message. (CLEARS THROAT) Hello Relationshapes, it’s me Chloe Sevigny, the famous actress and clothing designer(?). Can I just say that I’m your biggest fan and your shapes are almost too much for me to handle? I love everything about this comic strip. And the frames, don’t even get me started on those amazing gold frames! Meet me on the Lower East Side and let’s ‘paint the town pink’ like one of your shapes! I’ll wear my hottest fashions and you can wear whatever you want because you’re an artist so you can look like a bum.”

Previously: Relationshapes: Part Thirteen.

David Rees is a former political cartoonist. Now he is an artisanal pencil sharpener.

25 Comments / Post A Comment


mmm chicken...


"Will you go through that pile of clothes and sports magazines and tell me what you want to keep and what I can get rid of?" Are you tapping my phone?!


oh, relationshapes. i want so much to love you, but i don't think i get you. i swear...it's not you, it's me.

Aileen Jeffries

I mean this in the nicest, most self-deprecating, I'm-probably-the-rube-here way, but I totally don't understand this or find it funny.


@Aileen Jeffries Amen. Don't get, not funny, just... trite she nags he whines.. won't miss this, at all.

Hot mayonnaise

@lids: Why do you keep reading them?




@aileen jeffries - NO. You're not. I'm on the verge of taking my usual "no, no...i GET it...i just don't think it's *funny*" stance, but that's just not true.


@freelee Guys. We've covered this.


@melis Seeing it covered every time there are new Relationshapes has just become part of the thing for me.


@theharpoon i LOL at Relationshapes and then i LOL at the "wait, is this funny?"s. 2 for 1!


The gold frames are pretty amazing. I didn't expect ol' Chloe to have that level of good taste.

Also, the fried chicken? I heart you so much, Relationshapes.


I seriously don't understand how people can not find Relationshapes funny.

Gnome Vagina

@sophi Ooh! This is a perfect opportunity for us to connect and learn something from one another as Internet Commenters, because I don't understand how people can find Relationshapes funny. Like, really, non-sarcastically, non-flame-war-y, completely genuinely: what is the joke?


@Gnome Vagina I find amusement from the utter inaneness of it. I understand the I-don't-get-it stance, really, because that's how I initially felt. and damned if Relationshapes didn't get under my skin, and now I helplessly giggle with each new installment. have I become a pod person? oh dear...


@Gnome Vagina It's not something you can explain, it's something you feel deep, deep inside.


My boyfriend and I had a lively debate about whence the humor of Relationshapes - he argued it was a parody (of "Cathy"-esque relationship based humor) and I said that while it has some elements of parody the humor doesn't derive solely from parody so you can't call it that. I feel like it's more absurdist (and I don't even like absurdism) than parody. I can see how it is really hit or miss though.


There are few things I love more than Relationshapes, but one of those things is the little ribbon that connects each shape. Especially this week.


@carogriffin yes yes yes. I want to wrap my entire life in that border.


That ribbon is what the inside of my mind looks like. Except turn the heels into flats.

Tuna Surprise

@ohsweet - all my favorite things (ribbons, booze, shoes, fried chicken) in one package! Oh, David Rees, I'll sharpen your pencil anytime.


Loosest bra? How about no bra? All for you my darling Relationshapes, all for you.

Discussing the humor in a humorous post, how meta. I had to force myself to let go of my pre-existing notions of comedy and just let the relationshapes flow over me. *sparking another doobie*

Fig. 1 (formerly myfanwy)

I'm supplying my comment in a handy Quotable Format so Mr Rees can put it in the "Testimonials" section. "Relationshapes: the closest thing to Monty Python our generation can afford. Also, pancakes."

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