Beauty Q&A: She's Got Legs
Listen, this isn’t a makeup question, but still important for the overall *Lady Effect*:
Part 1. I live in a college town and there are a lot of formals this time of year, shorrrrt tiiiight dresses, big blowout hair, and extremely tall shoes. Very few of these pretty ladies know how to walk in high heels … resulting in weird crouch-monster gaits. It has also made me paranoid that maybe I walk like that in heels? HOW DO YOU WALK IN HEELS LIKE A LADY?! I checked YouTube for tutorials, but they weren’t that helpful.
Part 2. ALSO, I walk to/from work everyday (uphill. Both ways. I swear) and am always irritated about what shoes to wear. Should I wear walking shoes to walk in and change once I get to work? Should I (as a very classy lady) wear the heels I’d like to wear all day, no changing? But they hurt me, so I don’t want to. Is there a perfect shoe? FYI: I usually wear flats because I'm afraid of the issue in Part 1 and the problems in Part 2.
Last things first: Please don’t hurt yourself! You should definitely wear cute walking shoes to work, yes. Please, do not wear hose and cross trainers! Worishofer’s (below, in red) for your summer foot-commute perhaps? If you can afford to have a couple pairs of Sexy Date Heels in your closet at home and a few Comfortable Work Heels under your desk, you’ll have it made. Before we talk about how to walk in heels, let’s get you some painless but still cute/sexy pairs. My podiatrist (yes, I have one, whatever! I’m old!) says if you (I) can’t afford Prada, these will lean slightly chunky/crunchy, but here are a few great and reasonably priced brands with a comfortable toe box and sole.
Indigo by Clark’s (left) makes high heels that are very wearable (a friend of mine wears them to the hospital she’s doing her residency at and swears by them), and they keep coming out with hotter, trendier styles. And I have these saddle shoe heels from Bass (above) that are sooo comfy and kiiinda hot. As far as super-sexy shoes go, I find it’s hit or miss. I have one pair of Chinese Laundry platforms that never hurt (one of my friends has the same pair, same feeling), one pair of Guess, and, not to make a sweeping statement, but after a bit of Googling, it seems my three other comfy pairs are from Jones Group brands? Who knows? It’s a numbers game in the end. Unfortunately, the only wearable spike-heeled strappy insanely sexy shoes out there are usually uncomfortable and take a real pro to walk in them without injury.
OK, now that you have your shoes, how to get about in them without looking sad? Posture is key. Stand up straight, just as tall as you can, chin high-ish, shoulders back, eyes aimed straight ahead and try walking across the room in your new shoes. Pretend you are a model on ANTM. Do not look at your feet. It’s the same principle as being a good waitress: You only spill the coffee when you look at it. Don’t look; eyes straight ahead. If you feel your knees bending or your shoulders dipping/slouching a bunch, well, that’s not standing up as tall and straight as you can, now, is it? Is your ass slumping like it’s about to take a seat every step? Try again. If you’re finding this super difficult, I seriously, no kidding, think you should try the “balancing a book on your head” technique. Think these thoughts when you take it to the streets: “Not in a scary way, but seriously, every person I pass is so sad that they cannot throw me off my perfect balance and wife me right now.” As with most things beauty-related, you aren’t doing it right if you don’t feel, at least a little bit, like you look like an asshole. (Trust me that you don’t actually look like an asshole.)
And if none of this gives you confidence on your toes, fuck it and work the hell out of some flats. No heel is gonna make up for looking like an uncomfortable drunk baby deer.
I am about to embark on my official career after spending my entire life learning. The world I am about to enter is not one that demands suits or dainty dresses everyday but it IS a notoriously badly dressed profession (OK, OK I'm a librarian). I've been doing pretty good so far at remaining hip but still work-appropriate, but one thing plagues me: How in heavens does one figure out what color tights/nylons/stockings/what have you to wear with what. I've been doing the fleshy colored ones pretty exclusively, but I know it likely looks ridiculous half the time.
Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated, probably by the entire librarian world.
I promise you librarians & hosiery = hot. First though, do me a favor? Throw away any flesh colored hosiery you own right this minute. If you want the look of bare skin, it is perfectly acceptable these days to go bare at work with a knee length or longer skirt. If you feel too pale or bruised/veiny, use a little self-tanner or leg makeup! And though we’re headed into summer, I understand working in a cold, air-conditioned-to-all-hell environment every day can be torture (I run a space heater under my desk all summer). So, other rules of thumb: Only wear hose with mid-calf or higher cut skirts/dresses, never wear them with capris, and a fun trend right now is opaque tights under shorter shorts so long as you choose a not-too-sexy shoe – boots or Mary Janes work well. And before we shop, browse some of these styles for inspiration.
OK, for most looks, you’ll want the following on hand:
- One pair of patternless plain opaque black tights and a few pair of plain opaque colored tights. (Opaque meaning solid but not necessarily thick.) Colored tights are a chance to have fun with your look: they do not need to match whatever else you’re wearing especially if you’re wearing neutrals. Sure, get a brown and grey pair, but also try jewel tones (I am partial to the burgundy/magenta range) and for now avoid fluorescents or anything iffy. Spend an afternoon trying on at home with your different outfits.
- Three or four pairs of textured tights in neutral colors. By this I mean like a semi-opaque pair with a textured stripe or knitted look, a pair of faux fishnets, some lacy-looking tights, and a few wool or cotton knitted numbers. Again, first get the hose, then figure out what they go with once you’re home with your wardrobe.
- Two pairs of very nice sheer black hose, possibly with a seam up the back or side. Obviously, these will go with most fancier things if you’re opposed to bare legs.
I know this sounds expensive, but wait! Department store clearance joints are, I swear to god, the most ridiculously amazing places for hosiery. Think Marshall’s, TJ Maxx, Filene’s Basement, Nordstrom Rack. I’ve only been able to notice the irregularity that landed them there once or twice, and I don’t remember it ever stopping me from wearing them. The prices are low enough that you won’t be scared to take a risk and buy ‘em just to try ‘em. (You’re welcome, TJ Maxx for your new slogan. Freal, “Maxxinista”??) Seriously though, you can even find Wolford’s for like $25, which is insane. Once you’re totally a hose pro, all bets are off. Go have fun at, say, Anthropologie, where they have awesome crazy tights or, better yet, write me back and I’ll take you into garter territory. ; )
Previously: Wedding Makeup.
Jane Feltes produces the radio program "This American Life," and no makeup companies pay her to say any of this. Do you have a question for Jane?
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I want to copy and paste the paragraph about walking in heels and send it to every girl I've ever met, ever.
@Connor Simpson They probably would not appreciate that.
I live in Austin which has the similar "girls walking around all the time in short dresses and high heels they can't walk in" issue. It just looks so embarrassing to see someone wearing heels they can't walk well in. I used to not be able to walk well in heels but then I went to a six hour wedding in four inch heels and by the end I could dance in them. So my advice is practice a lot.
Best advice I would add vis a vis the actual physical motion comes from my ballroom dance instructor–think Barbie legs, swing your leg from the hip with your knee straight (but not locked, since you're a human)and keep 80% of your weight on your toes. Take shorter strides, which will help avoid the bent-knee clomp, and if you want a sexy hip-swing, walk putting one foot in front of the other, as if you're walking on a painted line a la a DUI test and/or runway, depending on your disposition.
Also, shoe selection is important. If you put on a pair of high heels and can't go up onto your tip-toes, your heels are too high and you won't be able to walk in them.
Do expensive stockings last longer? I destroy every pair of stockings I buy within the first three wearings (and I wear them like every day). I've hesitated to buy nicer ones for this reason because I'm afraid I'll just ruin them anyway. I feel like they can only be so durable, even if they're a nice brand.
@erratica: Yes – expensive last longer. If you are wearing them out too soon try buying a size larger than you normally do. If there is less tension they are less likely to get destroyed. Don't forget to handwash in the sink.
@erratica I personally think this depends on how you're destroying them. In my experience, expensive stockings stay nicer for longer – the waistbands don't stretch out and the knit of the stocking part holds its shape better. But the expensive kind are just as likely to be punctured by your dog jumping on you when you get home, the velcro from your kid's shoes rubbing up against them as you carry the kid out of daycare, your rough broken fingernail grazing them, or that weird rough patch under your desk you keep accidentally bumping when you cross your legs. I personally try to avoid stockings in favor of tights when possible, but always save the expensive ones for important work days or days when I'm traveling and away from all of the usual stocking hazards. Also, our TJ Maxx is a great place to get expensive stockings cheap, and most department stores have a great sales bin full of nice stockings lurking some where.
@erratica From my experience, yes. I really like the HUE brand because they're not prohibitively expensive but they truly do seem to last longer and resist runs better than L'eggs or whatever else you can find at CVS.
@amity I second the HUE brand. They are always 2 for $20, have good finishes (shiny, matte etc.), and hold up forever.
@amity HUE are awesome. I call them (in my head) "Wolford for broke people."
@rootmarm HA! That is so so true.
I've also had a pair of Spanx tights ($20ish at Nordstrom Rack) for TWO YEARS and they're only just starting to wear out. I recommend. Not the pantyhose, though – the tights.
@erratica I get Talbot's stockings which are a little pricey but not too prone to running immediately. If you're pretty careful they can last many wears without running. For opaque tights, I have found that J. Crew's black opaque tights are the most perfect tights ever – albeit they are also kinda pricey ($16.50; http://bit.ly/kcqGle) and not available in black right now but I'm sure they'll restock in the fall. They're perfect – they last for.ev.er and the waistband is comfortable and they're not too shiny, too un-controlling, or too control-top-ish, and the material is thin enough so it feels sexy. Cannot praise them enough.
@erratica I know this isn't the question you asked (personally yes, I think expensive tights last way longer – I see them more as pants than tights), but I want to big-up my favorite tights/socks shop. sockdreams.com They have really cute, really good quality tights there. I have a few pairs that have been in my wardrobe for two years, and I wear them a LOT.
@amity YES, HUE. They are always 2/$20 at Lord & Taylor, and there are always L&T coupons. I used to have to wear dresses and tights to work everyday, full time and I would just rotate a few different pairs of Hues. I STILL HAVE THEM, 2 YEARS LATER. AMAZING.
@erratica I wore Wolfords extra fine special occasion stockings at my wedding and they had completely disintegrated by the end of the night. Luckily no one could see them. They cost 9 thousand $ or something. JCrew ones seem to hold up pretty well? For less money.
@forrealz I have a couple pairs of Wolford tights I bought on study abroad in Paris. One I sadly never wear (it looked so good in the picture but I have nothing to wear black tights with white pinstripes with) and the other were my favorite pair of tights ever but they fell apart pretty quickly. Sigh. They're so expensive! And I still think about the pair I wanted but that was way too much money to buy.
@manshan Big, big, BIG props to SockDreams.com! They're great about posting actual sizing info according to their own trials of the hosiery on their site, too.
The manager-chickie is me friend, and she'll probably draw a dinosaur wearing roller skates or something equally silly on your invoice, because she's hilariously awesome.
@erratica TIGHTS ARE NEVER PANTS.
@erratica My Mom always had us freeze them. Anyone else hear of that, or is it an odd Northern Michigan thing? You'd wet them, roll them in a ball, put them in the freezer. Take them out, let them thaw and hang them up to dry. It was supposed to make them last longer, I don't know if it did or not.
@theharpoon I am so with you on this
@finguns Sadly, most of my stockings never get the chance to see old age and become saggy and misshapen… I put runs in them almost immediately. Which honestly works pretty well for my style aesthetic past 9pm but doesn't so much work for..work. I will try Hue though, that seems to be a trend from everybody.
@erratica yes! I stock up (PUN!) on Wolford opaques in the off-season when they're discounted and they last forever. I have a couple of pairs that are five years old and they're perfect after many winters of heavy rotation and machine washing. Another rule of thumb for buying tights is to buy XL even if you're not. I'm 5'6" and US size 6 and the XL sizes just hold their opacity so much better than the ones that are supposed to fit my dimensions according to the size guides on the pack.
Ugh, I've always wanted to be one of those ladies that wears heels like it ain't no thing! thx for the tips!! I've have had pretty good luck with cole haans as long as they weren't patent leather. and as long as they were on sale when i bought them. i also dont go over 3.5" coz i'm wimpy :-/
Sofft makes excellent and stylish comfy heels. Also, In my experience, walking to work in fancy shoes wears down the heels and makes them wear out faster. I am too lazy to go to a cobbler and too cheap/poor to constantly buy replacement shoes.
@Sydney C Sofft, seconded. But cobblers! Great!
I nominate Clarks Wallabees as the best commuting shoe ever. The sole is a solid inch of rubber, which is a) super comfy and b)waterproof. Also, they are cute with skirts in a grandma kind of way. I am telling myself that today because they are so comfy, I couldn't bring myself to take them off when I got to work.
@cuminafterall Second the Wallabees(any Clarks). I feel like such a dork wearing them in my usual life, but every time I happen to be in an actually cool neighborhood(Mexico City's Condesa/Roma, SF's Mission) I get stopped and asked about them. Keeps me wearing them another year or two.
Follow up question on walking in heels:
So this girl I know was walking somewhere with a boy she liked yesterday when she came to a screeching halt because one of her heels got stuck between the cracks in the sidewalk. She became very embarassed and had to admit she doesn't know how to walk in heels very well (this particular lady only owns two pairs that rarely get broken out).
Any hints? How do women avoid getting heels stuck in sidewalk cracks? Do you really have to stare at the sidewalk the whole time and hop around the cracks?
@Tuna Surprise yeah when i wear heels i have to keep an eye out for grates and general sidewalk treachery :-/
@Tuna Surprise Yes
once I got stuck in a sidewalk crack that totally skinned the sides off of my new kitten-heel boots the day after I bought them. Damn you charming New England red brick sidewalks!
@Tuna Surprise I hate to tell you, but you have to make this a part of walking in heels. Giant sad face, I KNOW.
@Tuna Surprise I live in NYC where there are those annoying grates everywhere so I've gotten used to scanning the sidewalk up ahead and then stepping lightly on the balls of my feet over them. In my head it looks adorable.
@Jane Feltes I just pretend I am in Singin' in the Rain, etc. when I have to do a grate-prance.
@hungrybee God, whatever you do, don't ever cross the Brooklyn Bridge in anything other than a wedge. I have absolutely RUINED a pair of heels that I thought were thick enough not to get stuck between the wooden slats. And they did get stuck. At just about every step!
Also, it really just takes practice to walk in heels. All there is to it!
@Tuna Surprise You have to keep an eye out! If I can tiptoe over subway grates here in NYC, sometimes I'll do that, but for the most part I avoid them, and move to the other side of the sidewalk. And if someone is making that difficult, i.e. one of the nameless employees at Large Investment Bank next door who stand around outside on cigarette breaks, I am not above snapping at them and asking them to move.
also, when do we get to garter territory? i want that post. those things are CON-FUS-ING!!!!
@karenpr Seconded!! Cause the garter belts I see at stores are obvs for sexy times only, and do not appear that they could get me through a work day. Also, why do I always see garter belts, but never thigh highs to go with them? Only the ones with annoying anti-grav rubber that doesn't actually work! HELP!
@BethH Helpful: http://www.thelingerieaddict.com/2010/10/how-to-buy-vintage-lingerie-for-perfect.html
@karenpr Garter belts + stockings are the bomb, workday or sexyday. No control top cutting into your waist or unpeeling pantyhose every time you have to pee. The kind of thigh highs with the rubbery tops are every woman's mortal enemy (unless you're a girl with pretzel stick skinny legs, in which case, go nuts)!
@karenpr Yes! Oh my God, Jane, take me into garter territory! I am so ready!
I cannot for the life of me walk in heels. I've owned a few pairs and only one of them was even remotely comfortable, I wore them out and never replaced them. I'm still scarred from having to walk something stupid like 10 blocks to my car in my bare feet after a job interview 'cause my feet hurt so bad.
So I'm still wearing my 14i DM's during my daily commute because they make my feet happy. I also recently bought a pair of Doc Marten 3989's which are SUPER comfy and (apparently) very "trendy" at the moment.
Once and a while I think it might be really sexy to buy a pair of heels. Then I think about my poor feet and heels don't seem so sexy anymore.
@ReginaSavage Apparently you are me. Docs 4-ever. I don't even care I just want healthy and happy feet so I can stomp around and ride my bike and dance for ever and ever and ever.
Ahh! i used to be in the fashion industry and could not stand walking in heels! and i am short so i needed it. i found any heeled (stylish) boot worked best for me. it didn't even have to be a major heel and i could work with dresses/denim/tights whatevs! those clogged boots are always super cute and really comfortable. i even invested in a a pair on No6 boots for the winter which are soo comfy and warm and easy to walk in (pricey but worth it). Wedges that aren't too high are also a smart move. when all else fails boots to walk and heels when you get to work. also, i save the highest of heels for the drunkest of nights.
I think I’m way less of a capital-L Lady than Jane and the question-askers here, but I thought I’d toss in my two cents about work shoe comfort, as it is #1 priority with me:
I keep a pair of nice work shoes AND an old pair of Chuck Taylors under my desk, so that I can change when I get to work, or, if I wear nice shoes to a morning meeting first thing or whatever, can throw on the comfy ones for drinks/the commute home after work. I have said yes to last-minute plans due to this lifesaver more than once.
I second Indigo by Clark’s, and Clark’s in general. Super- comfortable and sturdy.
I love me some Dansko clogs. I know these are contentious style akin to Crocs in some people’s books, but they look totally professional, especially with pants, and really are very comfortable.
I moved to California and CANNOT drive with heels on at all. I need a pair of slip-on flats that can live exclusively in my car!
Ewwwww heels.
Yeah, wearing heels is something I could never master and so as an asshole kneejerk reaction I've sworn them off for eternity. Like taking piano lessons, or cooking meatballs. Learning to deal with it like an adult? Whatever! I don't have the patience! TEAM UGLY FLATS 4-EVA.
@Riff Randell it's cool. I do wear heels occasionally but there's no reason to deal with the pain if you really hate it. My friend doesn't own heels and has never worn makeup, but it doesn't make her less of a lady.
and flats don't have to be ugly! There are some hella cute ones out there!
also … wait? meatballs? aren't meatballs the easiest thing to make ever? smush ground beef into balls, fry in pan, dump tomato sauce on top … right?
@elysian fields somehow I always mess it up! I DON'T KNOW HOW. I think it's a disease or something. I'm not a terrible cook otherwise, really, but they are my white whale.
@elysian fields There are bread crumbs and seasonings involved in meatballs! Ground beef balls would not taste like your average meatball.
@Katie Walsh For real? 'Cause the process I described is literally how I make meatballs, and that’s how my mom always made them, too. Make meat into balls, fry balls, mix with spaghetti and tomato sauce. Maybe it's not as legit as a real Italian recipe, but that’s what I think of when I think of meatballs … literal balls of meat.
@elysian fields Hey, however you like your balls of meat is fine by me! I just know that most meatball recipes call for crumbs and seasonings. http://allrecipes.com//Recipe/the-best-meatballs/Detail.aspx
@elysian fields But why settle for just a ball of meat when you can put cheese up in there?
Don't forget to silently hum your strut song while walking for extra swagger (mine are Stand Back and Freakum Dress). Also, I own a wedge shoe for every occasion — very comfortable and easy to walk in.
I'm normally the Queen of the Kitten Heel but recently purchased and feel VERY comfortable in Clarks Domino Pip wedges.
John Fluevog makes my absolute favorite heels, and pretty much the only heels I'll wear. They are amazingly cute and somehow also just as comfortable. And they tend to have extra padding at the balls of the feet! Also, they last forever.
@Tragically Ludicrous Strongly seconded. Fluevogs are pretty much the best shoes EVER.
@Tragically Ludicrous How could you do this to me?! I just looked them up and now I'm drooling…. unfortunately they are entirely out of my price range. Gorgeous.
@Elleohelle They do a fantastic sale once a year where a lot of them are half off.
Also, I save up for those shoes like whoa. I have three pairs, and they are literally the only shoes I wore all fall/winter.
@ cherrispryte I think I'll start saving up as well… the hard part will be deciding which pair(s) to save up for!
@Elleohelle Yeah, they can be pricy (although at least not like, Prada-pricy), but the sales are definitely awesome, and as I mentioned, they last FOREVER. I still have Fluevogs from at least 8 years ago in good shape, and I wear them everywhere, particularly in fall and winter.
I was out with a friend the other night who is a pre-school teacher — so on her feet all day — and she was still wearing a pair of heels she'd been in since 730am, and raving about them. Check out BC Footwear's wedges, at least: http://www.zappos.com/bc-footwear-womens~2
@EWorth I heartily second this. I have 2 pairs of heels from BC Footwear and not only are they super cute but they are as comfortable as sneakers.
Yay! I am about to be a librarian as well, so this is useful.
And there is hope; I was at the Texas Library Association's conference last month and a lot of the young people were looking VERY fashionable. I saw a lot of Anthropologie. I almost took pics of all the good looking librarians.
this is how you learn to walk in heels:
1. make sure your home alone
2. put on heels
3. put on Immigrant Song by Led Zeppelin
4. practice
trust me. after a few listens, you'll get it.
@FromTheFuture are we related?
@Jane Feltes: sisters in rock-song-inspired hip-shaking sidewalk-stomp.
If any of you ladies suffer from that syndrome where your tights/hose/what have you never stay up (aka "dumpy tights")I highly recommend the somewhat controversial Spanx tights.
If you also have freakishly long legs they have the added benefit of staying more opaque than other brands that I've found and they withstand a fair amount of beating (I am not nice to my tights!)
If you are additionally driven somewhat bonkers about how shiny black tights look unless you wear them inside out well come sit beside me on the weird "tights issues" bench.
@thatsrealbutter hold the phone, they're not shiny if you wear them inside out? I've been doing it wrong!
@rootmarm they are matte(er)! i learned that trick from a friend and now wear all of my black tights inside out.
I've found heels that have some sort of strap across the instep or around the ankle (or my favourite, t-strap heels) are easier for me to wear than ones that you just slip on. They just feel a bit more stable and I don't have to worry about them sliding off. And when I walk to work, I usually wear my chucks or TOMs then change once I get there. I just can't be one of those ladies that wear running shoes in their skirts and hose.
Also, I bought those Bass saddle shoes so quickly smoke came off my credit card.
@sarahf Oooh! Definitely seconding straps for heel newbies. High-heeled mules are definitely for the Advanced Heel Wearers. And whatever you do, don't buy shoes with ankle straps that aren't actually attached to the back of the shoe (like this). You'll get a false sense of security from feeling the strap around your ankle and then one wrong step and BAM! Recipe for a sprained ankle.
@sarahf The straps are a must. I have so many cute shoes that fit in the summer with bare legs, but slip right off when I wear tights. I usually end up stuffing the toes with Kleenex and that is just lame.
To make heels and flats more comfortable for me, I get those gel insoles (Dr. Scholls) and a little padded strip to line the heel/ankle part (I found these at Target). Also, for sandals that are heeled, footpetals were super helpful to stop my foot from sliding down. They also make a generic version of footpetals at Target (yay Target)
@ambling, I completely agree; just about any shoe can be made tolerable with a few adjustments! Those padded arch/ball of your foot support inserts work wonders. I have a pair of Repetto ballet flats that I spent a small fortune on, only to find out they feel like walking barefoot. The inserts saved them – they feel like really comfortable sneakers.
I wear flats for my long walks to and from work and they're fine except for the millions of tiny rocks that get inside! Maraca feet!
OMG. Jane. Please do this garter belt post. I am dying to buy one but I need advice! Where do I buy it? Sizing? Price range? What kind of stockings? Will this only exacerbate my upper-thigh/saddlebag issue? (I love my legs, but I have some serious thighs happening down there.) Help!
ETA: Also, I am an American lady living in the UK, so options in either country would be awesome, should any of you lovely commenters want to jump in …
@agba: I found that getting a garter belt with *metal* clips is infinitely better than the cheapo plastic ones you get from, like, Hot Topic.
That said, my garter belt came from a flea market–it's tough to find metal clip belts.
Sockdreams.com has non-elastic topped stockings that are lovely and wear well–I can highly recommend their backseamed ones!
Clipping the stockings on can be tricky–you'll want a belt that is snug on your *waist*, so it can't slip down.
1) Put the belt on.
2) Roll a stocking up your leg, gently.
3) If they are backseamed, get those seams straight in a mirror.
4) Stand up straight, see where the garter clip hits the stocking. Grab that part of the stocking, slip it onto the rubbery bit, and then slide that *firmly* into the clip.
5) Do the same for the back clip–it's tricky, but you'll get there!
6) Repeat for other leg
7) Stand up, walk around, sit–make sure the garters are straight, and that your stockings aren't getting all twisted
aha. So now this is a makeup AND fashion column? color me pleased.
@elysian fields: agree. everyone needs to wear clothes! more Jane! (i'm an ass)
The title of this is so apt because for real, Jane is like one of the ladies in a ZZ Top video dragging us into a gas station bathroom and giving us makeovers.
For the flat-wearing ladies (Holler!) I recommend these: http://www.zappos.com/born-precious-panna-cotta-metallic Basically all I wear are Born flats. They are the bomb heezy or whatever the kids are saying these days. In fact I'm wearing them RIGHT NOW
@alpelican Oh lame, the link didn't work. Let me try again. Best Flats Ever
@alpelican Just wore those today! They rub a bit but that should get better and there is so much awesome padding in them! Plus they are pretty and neutral and go with everything.
@Elleohelle they do take a bit of breaking in. Mine are still a little tight around the toes. My main issue (in life, really) is foot sweat so the fabric in them is a total win.
"No heel is gonna make up for looking like an uncomfortable drunk baby deer."
haha, super.
Stuart Weitzman's heels are seriously somehow SO COMFORTABLE. I borrowed my best friend's strappy backless SW sandals and stood up and danced at a party for HOURS in them; I'd never have picked them out myself but now I steal them on the regular. It's not just a function of price — I have some other fancypants shoes bought from sample sales or thrifting — it's just something about his shoes specifically. Two notes! One, they are mad expensive normally (normally around $300, up to $600), but you can get them for cheap at the yearly Saks sale or on eBay if you don't mind used (I just bought a pair of sick pink alligator pumps for $15.49). And two, both for SW and in general, a little bit of a platform helps so much with the ball-of-the-foot pain. It doesn't need to be like a huge, tacky Kardashian-style platform, just a little lift in the front to cushion your footfall. It makes such a noticeable difference!
Heel Walking Tip: I think it looks a bit more graceful when you try to put one foot in front of the other, instead of hobbling around bow-legged.
@Katie Walsh This is a good point, and also follows the "pretend you're a model" advice.
@Katie Walsh: having ridiculously large feet helps too.
Now I'm going to go do my grocery shopping in ridiculous heels. For practice.
Kind of/totally an aside, but those of you with iPhones should download the Zappos app and then put something in your cart to see what happens. Makes you want to put MORE things in your cart. Smart!
I'm just going to use this post to whine about how I've been looking for espadrille wedges for four days. All these choices are making me hate everything! Ahhhh!
@thatsrealbutter I can't find a cute wedge that ISN'T either cork or espadrilley raffia stuff.
Seychelles is another comfortable shoe brand with a lot of really cute options. The insoles have a decent amount of padding, although some styles are stiffer in the toe than others. http://www.zappos.com/seychelles-womens~2
@blerg Second that! I LOOOOVE Seychelles. I have a pair of bootie heels and a pair of flats and they are seriously comfy and chic.
@LauraJ I @blerg I just did a quick FIND "Seychelles" on this post to make sure someone had discussed how amazing they are. I own … let's not talk about how many pairs of Seychelles I own. THE. BEST. EVER.
I buy heels ocasionally when they're on sale and I just adore them, but I am about 80% sure I just can't walk in them. At all. I pull em out of the closet from time to time and try. I guess poor people with weird feet don't get to wear anything but ballet flats and the rare kitten heel. The bums me out very much regularly.
@McEllen Same here. I have trouble with ballet flats too (too flat). As Jane mentioned, Clarks have been coming out with some really cute heels and boots and I bought a pair of heels for the first time in like 12 years!
My experience with heels is that you get what you pay for. If you buy some cheap shit from Forever 21 or equivalent, your feet will be hurting five minutes after you put them on, and that will make you walk like an idiot.
Heels that have some sort of strap or other material across the instep are way more stable for walking. Look for heelsy mary janes and lace-up brogues. I have a pair of high-heel oxfords (which I like to call my "sexy librarian" shoes), and they are comfortable and other ladies compliment the shit out of them.
I just bought a pair of Aerosoles heels – they are super cute but most importantly ridiculously comfortable. I bought from DSW's clearance section, but they are usually moderately priced even if you buy them from their website.
@marymary I am a teacher and I swear by Aerosoles. You're not going to be sexy, but you'll easily pass cute most of the time.
Uncomfortable drunk baby deer is pretty much how I am always, heels or no!
I am hardly a heel expert, but recently purchased this cushion-y combo pack thing at the drugstore. It was only $10 and it included cushions for the balls of the feet AND the back of the heel, and a little clear sticker to give grip to the bottom of the shoe. I highly recommend.
Thank you for linking to my blog, The Lingerie Addict.
People! Sockdreams.com! http://www.sockdreams.com. Love them to bits and they've got free U.S. shipping.
Jane, you are the best! This is so helpful. Usually I am a fly by night hose lady, but just reading this makes me realise how much I would benefit from a little PLANNING. The BEST!
Okay I am about to divulge a VERY IMPORTANT TIP related to heels-wearing, so pay attention
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Make sure you have the right width of shoe! This is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT. I discovered late in life (age 22) that I have narrow feet that could probably function as skis. "Oh," you say. "What problems could that possibly pose? They are probably all dainty and shit." They are, but they also resulted in me being in extraordinary pain while trying to wear any kind of heel, even supposed comfort brands like Born or Sofft, because my feet slide forward and scrunch up in the front and get terrible toe-blisters. I thought I solved the problem by buying shoes a half-size too small, and the sliding disappeared but I got blisters everywhere instead of just my toes.
When I finally got proper narrow shoes, it was like the heavens opened. Heels still aren't terribly comfortable, especially since it seems like my heels are even narrower than the front of my feet, but they're SO. MUCH. BETTER than before. It sucks because you're really limited in brand availability and you have to shop exclusively online, but it's worth it to not waste hundreds on shoes you will never ever be able to wear. Nine West makes some narrows that are cute–they don't last super long but there's often a good sale. Sofft has some narrows, too (kinda want these, can't decide if they're Too Much?). I've been told that Italian-made shoes tend to run narrow, but I haven't tried it…I think most people's feet tend to run wide so I'm skeptical of anything other than a proper N or AA.
Anyway! measure your feet! It could be life changing.
@dotcommie 2nd this! i wear AA or AAA and am very picky about making sure my shoes fit perfectly. it does limit my choices though. i love stuart weitzman, donald j pliner, bruno magli, amalfi and vaneli. try 6pm.com for a variety of widths for cheap.
No one has mentioned the MOST important thing about walking in heels—Where are your toes pointing?
Walk with your feet pointing in FRONT of you, not all cock-eyed at 10 and 2. I guarantee you, nothing outs a bad-heel wearer like a duck-footed walker.
My mom used to walk behind us and say "12 o'clock! 12 o'clock!" (I…might have lingering issues.)
But seriously, your toes should be pointing straight in front of you. Do this, along with Jane's posture and attitude, and you'll look like you know what you're doing. If you want to master the model walk, by all mean, 12 o'clock it out.
Does anyone have a recommendation for quality, comfortable wedges or wood-soled heels? I love the style so much; the execution I am unsure of.
For awesome tights, those from hansel from basel (www.hanselfrombasel.com) are really unique and comfy, and they do a big discount on a different pair every month for their "sock of the month" offering. I ordered a few pairs from them recently and was really impressed (for ONCE my tights didn't fall down!).
@milksteak thanks for the link! try frye, they have tons of wooden soles and wedges AND wooden-soled wedges.
@milksteak Jane, I think we might be shoe twins. I totally second Frye and I have those black/white shoes up top.
LIBRARIAN HIGH FIVE!
JANE! Take us into Garter Territory! We're ready… we trust you. Lead on, lady leader.
They look dorky as hell, but I wear Sketchers Shape-Ups for my 2mi walk to work. Once I broke them in, they became super comfortable! I look like a fool if I forget to bring shoes to bring other flats or heels to change into once I'm at work, but it works out pretty well otherwise.
…also, I am TOTALLY on-board with a trek into Garter Territory! I've wanted to switch to garters and stockings for /years/ but have no clue about them! #pleaseplease
For shoes, I have a rule where if I'm going to be doing anything other than looking hot while sitting on a bar stool, it's 3" or less for heels. Kitten heels are made of win. But, my current favourite that you have to pry off my feet are my Doc Marten Darcie heels. Oh yes, Doc Marten heels! They're 8-eye lace up booties and they are SO COMFORTABLE and I run around and stand up a lot all day.
And socks/hose/etc leg coverings it's sockdreams.com always – you can get stuff for really inexpensive. Just don't buy the last pair of thigh high socks that I wanna buy and we'll be cool.