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Friday, April 1, 2011

15

A Cure For Baby-Pattern Baldness

Baby girls are wonderful! They're so soft and pretty and precious, and they do such cute things. But sometimes you find yourself looking at one and thinking, "I really wish she had more hair. A few silky locks would just give her the dash of femininity she needs to realize her full potential." Well, thank goodness, there's a solution to this glaring error of nature: Baby Bangs! It's like a headband and a wig put together, and — as these before and after photos prove — it will take any baby lady from drab to FAB in seconds!

[Thanks, Melissa!]



15 Comments / Post A Comment

saythatscool

I'm familiar with a "Baby Bangs" website but you're disqualified from appearing on there if you have any hair.

Emily L. Hauser/ellaesther

God made very few perfect heads.

The rest he covered with hair.

This is why both of my babies were as bald as that wee lass until about the 18 month mark.

Also, too: That child is perfect! Take off the damn wig! Sheesh.

foureyedgirl

Why isn't one of the questions in the FAQ "what the WHAT?"

tiny dancer

I'm concerned about the future conversation that will take place when the baby gets older. "Mom, Dad, why did I have orange hair as a baby?" "Oh because we thought you looked like an a-hole and were embarrassed to show our friends your photo. So we got an orange wig."

Kneetoe

Among MANY other problems with this, there's no way a baby is gonna leave that thing on her (his?) head for more than about 1 second.

Bittersweet

No kidding. The only way that baby isn't ripping that monstrosity off her head in the right-hand photo is that those flowers have rice cereal on them.

Melissa Locker@facebook

I am here to help spread the word about the tragic plight of baby baldness.

ThundaCunt

i know its wrong....but that baby on the right is ADORABLE with that bright red hair. i am so ashamed....

but on the other hand, i am with Knee....that baby is ripping that thing off in like 2 seconds flat...so Momma better snap away with that cam.

kbn22

I was certain this was an April Fool's site - until I did a Google search and realized they've been around for years. BB brags that: "Because of its fine texture, softness and life-like appearance, we are often asked if Baby Bangs! Hair Strands are Real Hair!" I think they're misinterpreting the question. I think it's more like people are shocked at a wig-wearing baby, but are trying to be polite: "Is that, uh, her real hair??"

notjenny

Real talk, my mom probably would have used them on me as a baby. I had no hair until I was 3, and she used maple syrup to glue bows on my bald head so ladies at the grocery store would stop calling me her son.

ThundaCunt

*dead* maple syrup tho!??

fleurdelivre

My mom just slapped a bonnet on me for photos when I was a bald baby. Until about two years ago, I thought she just really liked bonnets...

didgeridoo

I think I'd be more concerned that my baby's topless than that she's bald...

Kendra Porath@facebook

In case your bald baby would like more options:
http://www.babytoupee.com/

SyntheticVagina

one of my sisters was bald until she was almost four. wigs would have been fun but totally unnecessary.

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