Tuesday, March 15, 2011


The Cork Screwnicorn

"[T]he Screwnicorn will bring a smile to your face every time you decide to pop a bottle of your favorite vintage!" No it won't — look at it. Use a real one. Sorry, this was supposed to be funny in some way, but it isn't.


22 Comments / Post A Comment


Shouldn't it have some kind of wings to pull the cork out? Or would that be a Screwinicornasus?

Hot mayonnaise

My stuffed narwhal does a much better job. I can also roast marshmallows and hot dogs with it.


I had a serious crisis last week---my regular corkscrew, the one that looks kind of like E.T. know what I mean? Well one of his arms broke off, and then the other one did, and then the corkscrew did in the cork itself. Horrid! I literally broke a sweat prying that sucker out of there, but I did. I would have killed for this Screwnicorn at the time.


It's ok a good dentist can make you teeth look good as new!


Bwahahahah, I never thought of the E.T. thing, and now that is how I will always think of my corkscrew! Mucho gracias!!!


I do not care to admit how many times I have basically punched myself in the face trying to pry out a wine cork using a corkscrew without some sort of a lever mechanism. Sorry, screwnicorn.


I'm picturing screwnicorn with a sad face and it's making my face sad.


I had a guy actually do that to me at a party once. SCARRRRYYY... "I'm a professional bartender, here, let me open that for you..." *KUCHUNK* with the sharp rabbit ears to the inner eye and bridge of my nose. Followed by a bloodcurdling scream, grabbing my face to see if my eyeball was still in my head. I had a bruise and swelling on my face for the rest of the party, but I drank on. The guy was suitably humbled and abashed and AVOIDED me, as he should have. It CAN happen, if you stand next to the wine opener.


On the other hand, it's just the perfect kind of novelty for one of those white elephant gift exchanges. Get one now and if you can still find it at Christmas then you're already finished with your shopping and you can spend your time drinking cocktails and curling you hair instead!

Miranda Everitt

Drinking + whimsy = totally this site's demographic


This is a terrible thing to use to open a bottle of wine, but it does hit the sweetspot between my two collections: corkscrews and white china animals. I think I will have to get it, but it will sit on a shelf, with my other decorative-but-useless corkscrews.


Use a real what? Corkscrew or unicorn?


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