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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

29

Mrs. John L. Strong Helps You Spend All Your Money on Paper

High-end stationery store Mrs. John L. Strong — whose catalog, as commenter Lily Rowan notes, is like an American Girl Doll catalog for grown women — has relaunched its website. On it, you can buy such beautiful, perfect little things as these Bison Cards, $135 for 20. Are you silent-screaming? I can't hear you over my own silent scream.

So lovely. Also, the Rococo Squirrel Card (also $135 for 20).

And the Bronze Place Card Holders, $175 for 24. How have you lived un-place-held for so long?

And, so pretty, Corn Place Cards, $40 for 12. (The Pomegranate Place Cards are excellent as well.)

The purpose of "The Entertaining Journal" (written across the cover) is to record "each sumptuous detail" of your every sumptuous get-together. (Details about non-sumptuous events rip tiny holes in the paper.) $125.

Naturally, Mrs. John L. Strong also does bespoke and wedding stationery, too, but if you click those sections she puts a hand over yours and reminds you in a soothing but firm voice that you must show up at their New York headquarters to even think about being part of that world.



29 Comments / Post A Comment

atipofthehat

I just wish I could find a source for Crane's Distaff Linen. Why did they discontinue it? Why!?!?

nonvolleyball

okay, how did you possibly fail to mention that they also sell something called a FOLDING BONE!!111!!!

http://www.mrsstrong.com/STOREFRONT/productdetail.aspx?idproduct=1034

folding. bone. FOLDING BONE. oh my god, I definitely just proved that I will never be genteel enough for Mrs. John L. Strong & her fancy-lady accoutrements.

wallsdonotfall

The rest of us bookbinding types just call it a "bone folder." Oh, the rich and their little jokes!

bearpope

Folding bones are phenomenally helpful when stuffing envelopes (wink wink, nudge nudge).

Lily Rowan

<3 <3
I do need to point out that the Bison and Squirrel cards do come with envelopes. So they are practically a bargain, really,

The Secret Sharer

my favorite thing there is the wine journal. i mean i really need that!

fierce_pierce

Oh yes. Most entries in mine would read "Three buck chuck from Trader Joe's: delightful hints of musk and blackberries tingle the nose and oh shit I'm drunk again."

ThundaCunt

LMAAAOOOO!!!!!

fierce_pierce

I spent all my money on Sun Room tablets [http://www.mrsstrong.com/storefront/productdetail.aspx?idproduct=1044]. All I have left is the Chuck, and Uncle Carlo, which you know, is in the jugs. And tastes of deep clove cinnamon and leather.

Tish

I assume that what makes these cards more special than regular poor people cards is that they stamp, address, and mail themselves, yes?

I need a manicure

Ah, yes. That reminds me to restock on gold-engraved tablets for the butler's pantry. I mean, to have the butler do it.

amuselouche

Um, are we just not mentioning the Indian Head cards? Because I desperate wish to know the responses I would get if I started sending my thank you notes on these.*

http://www.mrsstrong.com/storefront/productdetail.aspx?idproduct=1067

*Wait, no. No, I do not wish to know.

PBandJ

Oooooh my friends who live on the reservation would love to recieve these. It's SO posh. I keep them in the same drawer as headless Ben Franklin cards.

backstagebethy

Where is the clearance section?!

Hot mayonnaise

$135 for 20, $175 for 24, $40 for 12, etc.

Genius pricing so that you can't figure out the cost of each one!

PBandJ

Can someone tell me WTF is bespoke?

scroll_lock

It means custom made however you like!

PBandJ

So with a cat, a gun, and a tampon, and then my initials.

atipofthehat

Ooooo, please send me a card someday.

ThundaCunt

ooo me too! i would fancy rcv'n a card!

FromTheFuture

if your initials are "SF" I'll go in on that order with you...

TerseNursePornstein

@PBJ Love this– but The Mrs. wouldn't have. Don't know if the current owners have a better sense of humour but this wouldn't have flown in the ancien regime. I was a one-time customer and can testify.
n.b. It was a moment of weakness. And the bespoke stuff, if you are insane like me, was from another era. They allow you to use a die created for, say, a Mellon, for a fraction of the cost. (Thanks for the disembodied horse head, Bunny!) They'll still get you with the cost of the obscenely creamy paper, hand stamping, and don't even get me started on the envelope lining. But that box of gorgeous writing paper is still going, er, strong, being that
I live in 2011, and very rarely have occasion to drag it out.

TerseNursePornstein

Oh I forgot: Their real stock in trade, har, is the hand-engraved wedding invite. So be prepared to waiiiiiiiiit, and reminded of this frequently. Gird to be single-shamed like only that old cow of a grandmother to whom you'll be sending many of these can!

Fig. 1 (formerly myfanwy)

Oooh Hairpin, you have found my Achilles' heel. I plan on moving to Minnesota with a letterpress and several crates of cider and Mini Eggs when I win the lottery.

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