Valentine's Day Tips From a Man
It's Valentine's Day, and a nation turns its lonely eyes to Marie Claire's beloved man-blogger Rich Santos. Rich, what's up with you this Valentine's Day? I see you're offering a list of V-Day Dos and Don'ts.
Don't Go Too Gung Ho Too Fast
… I'm not sure which is more awkward: receiving a gift when you didn't buy one for your significant other, or giving a gift when they didn't get you one. The second is definitely more embarrassing, so I'd urge you not to buy a gift if you're not sure — at least you can save face that way.
That's kind of heartbreaking, Rich. Don't always save face! Sometimes it's about losing your face completely. Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day to you from The Hairpin, and I sincerely wish you luck in love this year. One last thing, though, should I go psycho?
Don't Go Psycho
Sometimes I wonder if Riiiiicchhh is just a performance piece by the writers of Marie Claire speaking in the voice of "Dumb Dude."
Totally! That would make more sense.
I get the impression Rich has some serious abandonment issues. Let's talk about it, Rich. Rich, Rich, Rich. Has anyone ever called you Dick?
No really, that's just the tip.
Hey Rich, what's a "rose pedal"?
"… single guys like me and my buddies go out prowling for these groups in hopes of easy pickins."
So, tonight I finally have a chance with a guy like Rich Santos!?!?! Better take the rest of the day off to do my hair.
Rich sounds like such a catch, doesn't he? Dang it, if I were only single, so I could get all dressed up and be an "easy pickin" for Rich and his gentleman friends.
It actually seems like it would be more difficult to "pick up" on Vday than any other day.
Rich. Rich! Rich. With pickin-prowling tactics like that, how are you still single? No one is hotter to trot than a bitter girl surrounded by her lady friends.
"Valentine's Day is a vehicle for all you people who don't do so well with sharing your feelings"
aw, Rich, it's like you know me!
mind you 'a vehicle for people who don't so well w/ feelings' makes it sound like The Repression Bus.
"But it's even creepier that, in order to spread the roses in someone's room, one must sneak in without her knowing."
You should additionally paint all the walls and ceiling red and cover the carpet and mattress with visqueene. He will be pretty surprised how romantic you are and forget that you entered his house without permission.
What's wrong with going psycho?
I think RichieRich is on to something with that one. I recommend going dumb instead. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbJAPwrrjek
RICH!