Monday, February 14, 2011


On Trend: Fetuses

Forget Carla Bruni and Zoë Kravitz — this season’s newest style icons are fetuses, says Marie Clairol editor Anne Cowill. Here’s why:

Dangerous liaisons: “Almost anything can harm a proto-newborn,” says Frank Lunt, an amateur volunteer gynecologist. “Their thrilling vulnerability is what makes them so fun to watch.”

The hippest a humanoid can be: Fetuses never depend on their peers for style tips, as they can’t speak directly. They communicate their exotic food cravings to their parents, and dine out on the town in flattering, all-placenta ensembles.

Life of leisure: “Since fetuses are wholly dependent on their mothers, they don’t need to work full-time like the rest of us,” says Persons magazine writer Joey Bartolomatthew. Post-zygote hobbies include modeling for haute ultrasounds and DJing in-uterus, communicating their musical tastes with sharp kicks.

Magnets for controversy: “Fetuses’ much-debated status–as people with legal rights or still-developing humans–keeps them in the public eye,” says Cowill. “Their ever-changing bodies keep people guessing, like legendary shapeshifters Chloë Sevigny and Madonna before them.”

Arianna Stern just wants a dog.

Photo via Flickr

6 Comments / Post A Comment


Yeah, that fetus is super sexy. More sexy fetuses at http://barelyfetal.tumblr.com/. Oh yeah.


Yeah, speaking of fetuses. I was waiting in the doctor's office a few weeks ago and idly started flipping through some magazine for expecting mothers. And there was an ad for a new product you can buy, which is framed ultrasound pictures of your in-utero baby's semi-developed face. In the ad, many of these pictures were arrayed in gold frames on a mantlepiece. I was mesmerized/horrified by this.


"an amateur volunteer gynecologist." made me crack up!

Lah Ra Funnerstall

“Their thrilling vulnerability is what makes them so fun to watch.”

Excellent. I also love that this article triggers advertising targeted to expectant mothers.

Arianna Stern

@Lara & @thundacunt_1 -- thank you!

@barelyfetal -- ewwww


Just love this.

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