Tuesday, February 8, 2011


Her Skintight Pants, for Him

This Valentine's Day, give him the gift of style with a "tribute" to his ex-girlfriend. It's like when you wear "boyfriend" sweaters, without any differences.

(This also reminds me of a video I think is hilarious but that others disagree about.)

20 Comments / Post A Comment


Wait, where is the video?!?! The link goes to iVillage's article about these crazypants.

Edith Zimmerman

Oops! Link fixed. Also, here.


Also available: Ex-girlfriend wife beaters!

forget it i quit

I have ex-girlfriend jeans. Not these and not skinny jeans but stolen from an ex-fiance who cheated on me after I lost 50 lbs and found out they fit pretty well actually.

This was after she joked if I got skinnier than her she'd break up with me. Is this a thing? Is being skinnier than a girl a dealbreaker? Or was it because she was struggling with her weight too and it was a competitive thing?


Her sexual preference, for him.

Lila Fowler

More than anything, I'm confused about the color. 'Mask (Waterless)?' That wasn't in my Crayola box.


I am confused by "Country of Origin: Imported." I would like to go to Imported on vacation. You know, see the ruins, eat the local specialty, maybe spend a day or two at the beach.

private hangnail

'Imported' is manufacture speak for 'China'.


Soooo...jeans for men without genitalia. I'm sure there's a market for them somewhere. Maybe a trauma ward?


See, this why I don't get the skin-tight jeans on dudes: Wouldn't it be terribly uncomfortable squishing up one's junk like that?


Wait is this the time for my special "Ask A Lady" - let's say there's a big guy. Is he better off wearing baggy-ish clothes (you know he's big cuz he's not wearing a burqa and he's wearing baggy clothes, but at least it's not in your face until you dig the personality and that whole personality makes anyone look better thing happens) - not talking Mid 90s rap, just 'loose fit' - or should he just say fuck it, and learn to accept the fact that regular people clothes feel stupid on him.

A, uh, friend, wants your opinion.


I would tell your ... friend ... to avoid overly baggy clothing. Fit, of course, is very important. Clothes that fit the body are more flattering, and look more expensive. And really, you want to be indicating that you've "taken the effort" with your appearance, while baggy-ish clothes can read as "sloppy", which you don't want. You'd be amazed at how much "effort" matters.

Of course you wouldn't want to wear anything too small -- no muffin-topping, which is generally a function of the wrong size, not the wrong body. You want to feel comfortable and confident.

Without knowing specifics, I'd recommend a straight-legged pant or maybe a "relaxed" fit. On top, stick to slightly more structured looks, and make sure that the shoulders fit correctly. A drop-shoulder is generally ill-advised.


Also, this thread on metafilter might be helpful: http://ask.metafilter.com/176928/Are-there-any-good-looking-fashions-for-an-overweight-guy

Edith Zimmerman

SECONDED, wholeheartedly

Katie Walsh

Yes totally agree. Ever read those makeover columns in GQ? They've done some big guys and it's always getting them out of the pleated khakis and into the straight legged dark denim (not those jeans up there) and fitted (not tight) tops. Also, as a curvy lady, I find that form fitting clothes are a better choice for me than baggy items, if I want to avoid the dreaded FRUMP.


Thank you all. Apologies in advance to whoever I drunkenly hit on at the next Awl/Hairpin commenter boozing in ny.

Tom Blunt

Yeah, guys if you have a thick body in general, wearing jeans that make your legs look their super-skinniest is the number one way to get that egg-on-scissors look. It's the same thing with women too, really, but we're just already more accustomed to the idea of all female garments being skin-tight from the waist down .


"egg-on-scissors look"!!!!!

Tom Blunt

Yeah, you know -- Like a big round egg teetering around on a pair of scissor stilts!

Bus Driver Stu Benedict

I am getting this sense that couples arguing over who gets to wear what is maybe not that common? It's weird that - while reaching agreement on kitchenware and the music collection was difficult - it was dividing up the clothes that caused the most arguments during our breakup? That I got 3 pairs of ex-girlfriend jeans out of?

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