Tuesday, January 18, 2011


Today in Hangover Cures

A study of rats in Philadelphia claims that the easiest way to cure a hangover is so obvious you're probably already doing it; you just continue to relax in hangover pose on the weekends (weekdays? Fine!) because your brain needs the down time. The cure is aspirin and coffee, and the scientists found this out by giving rats hangovers and then trying to take them away.

Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia induced the rats' hangovers with ethanol, i.e. "pure alcohol." The idea was to block the chemical acetate, which is produced by alcohol—even small amounts of it—and causes headaches. Caffeine has been used for this purpose quite a bit: it's an ingredient in Exedrin, the headache medicine, and aspirin has anti-inflammatory properties, so paired together, they apparently do great work. Caffeine is sometimes frowned upon as a hangover cure because it allegedly dehydrates the already-dehydrated drunk. But the scientists say the rats were not dehydrated by their hangovers.

The only trouble is that aspirin is hard on the liver, which is "already stretched trying to deal with all the alcohol from the previous evening." So this was a total waste of time: go back to eating spoonfuls of honey and chasing them with bloody marys, or whatever. But seriously, what do you do...that works? Home fries? Green smoothies? Acidophilus? A beer? Vicodin? Rom-coms? All of the above?


26 Comments / Post A Comment


Some of us can't take aspirin without getting a major additional headache, and have also given up on caffeine.

How I prevent hangovers: WATER LIKE A MOFO. Drink lots of water pre-drinking. Try to remember to drink water WHILE drinking, but understand you will eventually forget. Drink 32 oz gatorade and eat a lot of something starchy before passing out.

And boom, without medicines, you are hangover free! Because the medicines will make you hurt more, if you are me.


Drink SO MUCH WATER that the entire night, you feel like you're going to pee yourself (and maybe actually pee yourself a little bit? sometimes?) When you get home, don't half ass the starch with crackers or some bullshit, make an elaborate meal (like mashed potatoes from scratch, or pasta with pesto and something else you have to slice, because knives? always a good idea). Make as much noise as you possibly can, fuck those other people you live with. Go to your bed and roll around in it for a while for no reason. Stand up abruptly, like you have something really important to attend to, but just give yourself the spins. Hold your face and go "OH GOD HOW DID I LET THIS HAPPEN AGAIN ON A TUESDAYYYY." Pop two Aleve and SLAM (you have to slam them, or else it doesn't work) as many glasses of water as you can (bonus, if you're with somebody else, challenge them). Brush your teeth 3-6 times, because every time you leave the bathroom, you can't remember if you brushed your teeth because your mouth still tastes like bourbon (but the toothbrush is WET???! AHHH!) Go back to your bed and roll around like a mess. Force your cat to spoon with you.

Works like a charm.


I was a bartender for 7 years and Alka Seltzer is the best and only cure, hands down. Try it and TELL ME it doesn't work. And after I've changed your life, please send donations to ciara719@gmail.com.


I use Alka Seltzer as well in a nice huge glass of water and then go back to sleep. No one ever wants to believe me that it works wonders, but it says so right on the box!


lemon-lime vitamin water, and i attempt to drink as much water as possible before bed. also tons and tons of sleep.


Sex and Excedrin (sexcedrin?). Though for obvious reasons, avoid if you're pukey or have a bad case of beer shits.

Liz Colville

so it seems a lot of experience really helps here! it took me about 12 years to understand what exactly I was dealing with: dizziness (dehydration) and headaches (inflammation) and fatigue (too drizzunk to sleep!), but I'm still working on the last two.


Does this mean you are 33 and you're trying to say you didn't drink until you were 21 (if so, why? Legal reasons? Is mom reading this?)? And take it from one older and more experienced (in this particular area): a hangover that you can cure is NOT a hangover (hangunder? fallover?--who knows what it is, but I know what it's not).


Hopefully Starbucks will start selling 900 mg aspirins to go with the Trenta.

Whitmans Sampler



Oh god YES! I'm convinced that the main ingredient in phở is magic.


Solpadeine Max. The world is cruel, and you cannot purchase this otc in 'Merica. My workplace's Irish maintenance worker hooks me up; in between stashes, I house-sit for a British expat.


I'd avoid the Solpadeine if I were you, that has paracetamol in it, which can cause liver damage all by its lonesome. Add that to alcohol, and you're on an express train to cirrhosis city.


No no no, I take it hours and hours later. My liver is in her prime, I promise!


Doublemint gum has served me well. Because I feel like once I get rid of the disgusting taste in my mouth, I could probably manage to eat/drink something else without vomming.


1. Xanax + Gatorade (Gatorade "G2" to be exact, half the calories to offset the 900 extra that I drank in margs the night before).
2. DVD marathons of Twin Peaks. Feel free to doze off a lot.
3. Diet Coke.
4. Another Xanax (optional).


5. "Bite the bullet, baybee, bite the bullet!"

Ginger Jane

A nice big glass of some kind of exercise replacement stuff before you go to sleep. And blue Powerade the next morning. Only BLUE Powerade will do, because of it's additional powers of "blue".


Blue Powerade is magical. I like to drink it while watching HGTV and wearing sunglasses... tv is too bright.

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